Good marrow, bonelickers!
Early last month I announced the 19th Speedlang Challenge. I broke the mould with it a little bit by confining how the ambitious among you would actually put together your speedlangs rather than defining a number of requisite features. The bulk of this process had speedlangers root all their creative linguistic decisions in a small set of natlangs, and these natlangs specifically had to be native to areas representative of a chosen clade of organisms. To ensure the clade of organisms was well represented, I also asked for a number of lexical items and conceptual metaphors that had to be specifically inspired by the clade in some way, as well as some aspect of the phonology.
Like last time, I'll provide my thoughts about what I think makes each submission special and the features I particularly like. Afterwards, I'll quickly review what was inspired by the chosen clade, in case that has any bearing on what you kind readers might like to check out, and give out brownie points for any easter eggs I spot, whether intended or not.
Overall this has been a deeply creative round of submissions and I learned a lot, both things I set out to achieve when I thought up this particular challenge. I hope it was just as rewarding a challenge for everyone who submitted as it was for me getting to read up on each entry, and I hope it will be the same for anyone who reads up on them, too.
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Seba Bàsa by Miacomet

Gyps (griffon vultures); Chamic, Bengali, Santali & Mundari
With a name including the element Bàsa, I knew this had to have Indic flavours of one sort of another, and indeed it does! This conlang is largely Austronesian in origin with sound changes from Old Cham, but it has a lot of Bengali influence and is well situated in the Indian subcontinent, and I greatly appreciate the nod to Parsi funerary traditions as an inspiring reason for choosing Gyps. Amusingly, this conlang has many features that fit right into the inspiration for the last speedlang challenge, which I find just delightful, with some split-S marking, dative enclitics, and grammaticalised constructions for simultaneous and sequential events, and light pronouns. Therebeside, the historical clipping, CVK syllable structure, postpositional pronouns, and aspectual auxiliaries speak to sensibilities in my own conlanging, and the dissimilation processes in some of the affixes are a nice touch, too. I'm also a big of fan just how the split-S system is implicated in some verbal polysemy, and I really like how the few voices seem kinda muddy but have clear use cases. What really sets this conlang apart, though, is the consideration paid to the effect of prestige languages. Some phonemes are restricted to loanwords from the local prestige language, and one is even only confined to prestige language-educated speakers, which causes some allophony other speakers don't have. Loaning processes are detailed, too, and the number and classifier system also draws nice lines along the prestige axis with a total of 3 parallel number systems, spread out across both divisions of native vs. loaned classifiers, which themselves have specific semantic domains they each classify, and across divisions of prestige language education. The story at the end, too, is a real treat: it's a translation of Hindu vulture myth, perfect for this project.
Seba Bàsa's Gyps-inspired phonology includes the development of creaky voice from the loss of glottals, glottalised consonants, and final /s/ in Old Cham to recall vulture cries. It's inspired lexicon includes some fun polysemy of vulture behaviours like circling = waiting or sheepling = looking for something desirable. I'm also a big fan of kite (the bird) = messy eater. It's inspired conceptual metaphors include dividing the beginning, middle, and end of a process into eating skin, meat, and bones, respectively, and equating head height/position with one's health or comfortableness as inspired by how vultures droop their heads when ill.
We're starting off string with double brownie points for meeting both the space epic easter egg by calquing the Ewokese word for 'outsider' and the empress easter egg by referring to Buddha's Birthday!
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Kogëdek by u/Porpoise_God

Setonix & Macropodidae more generally (quokkas + kangaroos & wallabies); Noongar, Pitjantjatjara, Wajarri, Guugu Yimithirr, Miriwoong, Guniyandi, Dyirbal, Mbabaram
Aside from the one splant you'll soon see, I think this entry gets the prize for the most unique chosen clade by being A) not a bird, and B) not an ungulate. As great as birds are, quokkas are pretty amazing, too. I'm not too familiar with Pama-Nyungan languages but this did a good job of affecting some of the features I've come to know them for, including but not limited to the phonological natural classes of peripheral vs. coronal, coverb constructions, and the word for 'dog' bearing a striking similarity to English. Split-ergativity features across the noun-pronoun axis, and there's a unique set of duals that specifically refer to sibling, parent-child, or spousal pairs of individuals that I might have to steal for myself. The case marking includes a lative case I haven't seen before, and implicates the comitative in a neat way in comparative constructions. I also appreciate the what-looks-to-be resumptive subject pronominal proclitics; very speedlang 18, and a great example of a fossilised mistake, which I always love to see! The verbs also feature multiple conjugations, and the imperative is implicated for its tenselessness in certain subclause constructions, which has a certain type of quirkiness I'd expect out of some past speedlang challenges.
Kogëdek's Setonix-inspired phonology included a /ç/ in the proto-lang, which bears some resemblance to quokka calls, although it was lost to /s/ and /x/ in the modern language. The inspired lexical entries include roots for different kinds of macropods and styles of jumping, and conflates jumping with breathing. Some of the idioms include "pouch-baby" for pejorative "mama's-boy" and using kangaroo badassery as a metaphor for all sorts of less than ideal situations.
Brownie points for a particularly insidious word-form for 'father'.
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Yatakang by Lichen

Bubalus (water buffaloes); Hindi-Urdu, Thai, Vietnamese, Khmer, Burmese, Malay
This one's a little rough around the edges, but it's a good foundation for a nice mix of both SEA features, like the isolating morphosyntax, and unique features, like the class agreement system. It's also got clicks limited to avoidance speech! Diachronics from a proto-lang where considered, and I really like how the typologies of the inspo langs were used as targets for the sound changes. I'll have to keep this workflow in mind! Some of the sound changes include expanding the number of stop contrasts to match the average number of contrasts, or eroding the number of vowels to match that of Malay. Phonotactics were carefully considered with full structures for both mono- and disyllables as well as bare roots vs. compound stems. Grammatically, morphology is mostly limited to a host of different reduplication patterns, which in itself is something I'd really like to see more of! Where this really shines, though, is with its agreement system: nouns are sorted into a 3x2 matrix of 6 classes, portmanteau agreement particles mark for the class of both the subject and the object, the system implicates the social hierarchies common to many SEA languages, and the position of the particle marks modality. Incredibly inspired to pack all that into a set of maybe 36 particles, if you ask me, never mind how it helps to disambiguate fluid word class and how it might be implicated in future plans for Indonesian object-oriented verbs. I'm also a fan of how the temporal question verb patterns like an agreement particle to mark for tense by co-opting the modality marking. We also get some prosody-syntax interfacing with different pitch contours at clause boundaries operating as different sorts of conjunctions.
Yatakang's Bubalus-inspired phonology includes a combination of creaky voice and syllabic nasals to affect a mooing phonaesthetic. The lexical entries exhibit some nice semantic drift from water buffalo activities and behaviours towards more human behaviours, and the planned phrase of hat-hand stroke fur for "suddenly realise a problem, and then pretend there isn't one" just feels exactly like an observation a water buffalo would make observing its human, which I really like. The inspired metaphors are also simple and straightforward, likening roundedness to goodness or knowledge to food, which makes for some brilliantly idiomatic language like "I ate the book" to mean "I read and understood the contents of the book."
Extra brownie points for including both halves of the space epic easter egg to placate both sides of nerddom; the term 'tax-man' is everything it ought to be.
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Kurikiri by Jjommoma

Casuariiformes (cassowaries and emus); Dhuwal, Motu, Tok Pisin
Compared to most other entries, this one's very short and sweet with some Australian sounds and some head-final Papuan grammar (however loose a description that is). That being said, Kurikiri is very inventive in being partially signed with much of its grammatical marking encoded by actions done with the foot, including number, case, definiteness, and some basic TAM.
Aside from the cassowary foot action grammar markers, as well as some lexical entries there-related, Kurikiri also equates flightedness to being ostentatious, disdaining flighted birds out of envy, which I think is a fun thought process for these terrestrially confined birds. There's also some neat phonosemantics in the taboo word for predator being especially difficult to pronounce.
This wasn't the intent, but I'm giving some space epic brownie points for the foot grammar if for nothing else than that it reminds me of Paul Frommer's Thark from John Carter and its telepathic grammatical and verbal lexical expression.
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Whaynisiday by u/Fimii

Spheniscidae (penguins); Māori, Xhosa, Quechua
What do you do when the entire population of penguins achieves human-like levels of intelligence after some gene splicing and they start calling for a language to call their own? Why, you do exactly what the prompt of this challenge asks for and combine the languages native to the homeland of the blue, african, and humboldt penguins! The write up for this conlang does a great job of pointing out what features are from which language exactly, and plays a fun balancing game between some of the phonological and grammatical extremes in its sourcelangs. In so doing it has a few quirks that really tickle the intersection of my linguist and conlanger venn diagram, specifically the presence of what I'd have to interpret as onset morae, as well as semantic noun class marked solely through agreement (which is very Varamm, so I'm not at all biased towards it). There's a handful of fun, rare cases, and the simulative mood fits right into the inspirations for the last challenge to create some vaguely Tupian simultaneous actions. There's a bunch more little grammatical bits that are fun, but impressionistically I appreciate how the more isolating grammar of Māori was incorporated into the synthetic common ground of the other 2 sourcelangs.
Whaynisiday's Spheniscidae-inspired phonology includes a couple syringeal sounds to complement the otherwise human capable inventory. The highlighted lexical entries pay special attention to how penguins locomote with basic stems for different kinds of movement options both on land and in the water, as well as a split in breathing for whether its on land at rest or in the water being active. The conceptual metaphors include a great model of time with the past on land and the future in the inky depths, and the very adorable notion that safety = community, and so naturally a farewell would be a wish of friendship.
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Poro by The Inky Baroness

Rangifer tarandus subsp. (domestic reindeers); Proto-Samic, Komi-Zyrian, Tundra Nenets, Chukchi
Where do I even begin with this one? I was excited to read this one when I first received it, but it was even better than I could have hoped when I got round to reading it! Although, not for any linguistic reasons: the first half of the doc reminds me of Gillian Teft's Anthro-Vision as an anthropological account of reindeers written by a fictitious Finnish researcher rather than any sort of sketched reference grammar, which I love dearly. The latter half, meanwhile, goes into great detail about what went into the first half, including all sorts of motivations or reasons for the decisions made. Some diachrony is detailed, as well as the effects of language contact rooted in actual historical events relevant to the chosen sourcelangs, which is just great to see. I loved the ways in which each of the different sourcelangs were all represented in the final product with it being Samic in origin but including some phonological and grammatical borrowings from Komi and Nenets like the lack of consonant gradation, the verb-final syntax, some vowel changes, and a fantastic predestinative affix that interacts with the conceptualisation of time in some neat ways. All the while, care was taken to do a wealth of research at every step in the process with a fairly extensive bibliography. Hoof clicks all around for this one!
Poro's Rangifer-inspired phonology includes a deer bellow as some sort of epiglottal obstruent that actually patterns with the Nenets glottal stop, as well as some other approximated reindeer vocalisations including what I presume to be grunts or chuffs, both oral and nasal. Care was also taken to think about what a fully reindeerised descendant of Proto-Samic would look like as accords with the included etiological myth for reindeers and reindeer husbandry, but this was well beyond the scope of a speedlang. The lexical entries include all sorts of terms for reindeer physiology, including but not limited to antler velvet, different types of vocalisations, and hoof clicks. These lexical entries feature in some wonderful idioms using antlers to describe social hierarchy, useful- or uselessness, and glibness or malicious intent, as well as an equivalent to "when pigs fly": "to catch a bird between one's hooves."
Extra brownie points both for the nominal hierarchical exaltation of mothers baked into reindeer culture and inclusion of an anti-imperialist message in promoting the research of the under-represented and often stigmatised language and culture of traditionally reindeer herding peoples. Also do keep an eye out for Dr. Dolittle easter eggs: Inky will reward you handsomely if you can spot one!
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Kiwi by NerpNerp

Apteryx & Novaeratitae more broadly (kiwis + cassowaries & emus); English, Māori, Traditional Tiwi, Miriwoong, Bardi
Given the number of bird entries with Indo-Pacific flavours, I'm almost half surprised this was the only kiwi entry: they're such good birbs! As might be expected, this conlang endeared itself to me just as its namesake does. The phonology has all sorts of trills and rhotics, and limits itself to high vowels; it's also got some neat phrase level prosody to mark different sorts of modal information and focus, even including an intrusive glottal stop at the sentence level. Noun incorporation is varied and detailed, and can create some polysynthetic constructions as a consequence of just how exactly the rest of the otherwise fairly analytic morphosyntax works. I'm a particular fan of the deictic categories including 7 different degrees of deixis characterising both distance and motion, and I'm also a fan of of the grammaticalised time of day. Heximal numbers and coverb constructions also feature. There's even a kiwi-capable featural alphabet that each of the examples show off!
Kiwi's Apteryx-inspired phonology includes the trills and high vowels being inspired by kiwi calls and I imagine a little of their anatomy with those long, thin bills. The inspired lexemes include specific types of smells humans can't detect at the expense of any colour terms, reflecting kiwis nocturnal, smell-based lifestyles. The idioms for "a long time ago" or "once upon a time" is absolutely delightful--"when kiwis flew"--and the grammaticalised time of day subdivides the night but not the day, as might be expected from a nocturnal beastie.
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Asamiin by Christian Evans

Asamina (pawpaws); Ottawa, Unami, Tuscarora, Mikasuki, Chitimacha, Timucua
The speech that nourishes! And a splant, too, no less; I was hoping for at least one of these! This one's made all the better by delving into some Eastern North American languages and I really like the flavours this lends itself to. Syncope is abound with all sorts of morphological obfuscation through detailed phonological processes, and animacy plays a key role in the verb complex. Care was also taken to find a phonological common ground between all the sourcelangs, which made for a really interesting set of vowels with a basic 6 vowel inventory, but with 2 nasal vowels that can surface as vocalic allophones to the nasal consonants. The grammar is fairly straightforward but has a few quirks that I really appreciate, including but not limited to the fluid O placement to make for some syntactic focusing strategies I so adore and the optional, enclitic case marking narrowed by various postpositions used as another, separate means of focus. Overall just really well laid out and the formatting is really cute, something I've now come to expect after Yumpịku last time.
Asamiin's Asamina-inspired phonology includes a pharyngeal approximant to recall the really long taproot pawpaws grow, as well as regressive sibilant harmony to recall the mimicry the flowers employ to attract pollinators, both of which are some really inspired departures from the sourcelangs.
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Ekaangäq by Atyx

Haliaeetus pelagicus (Steller's sea eagle); Chukchi, Alyutor, Koryak, Itelmen, Ainu, Nivkh, Evenki, Uilta
A bird that escapes any Indo-Pacific flavours? Well I'll be! Instead of South Pacific this one gives all sorts of North Pacific energy being spoken by a population of eaglefolk native to the Sea of Okhotsk and representative of the languages spoken along its coasts. The Ainu flavours are especially strong with both an Ainu-based consonant inventory and a kana orthography, among others. The vowels also show some interesting lopsidedness with 2 creaky vowels complementing an otherwise fairly straightforward 6 vowel system that feature in a front-back vowel harmony system, though I'm a real fan of the sandhi rules at word boundaries that cause all sorts of fun consonant alternations. Word stress is also detailed and has funky placement rules at odds with my understanding of theoretical prosodic processes! Grammatically there's a few quirks that really stand out to me and tickle my curiosity: a dual distinction on the nouns but not in the pronouns, and polypersonal agreement in a transitive alignment system, the only departure from direct, accusative, and/or ergative alignment in this round of submissions. I also appreciate some of the syncretism in the pronouns!
Ekkangäq's Haliaeetus-inspired phonology includes entirely unrounded vowels and a lack of any labial consonants to reflect the speakers have beaks, as well as the 2 creaky vowels as rooted in their physiology, a common theme for this challenge. The lexicon includes some distinctions between diving and eating as it applies to different kinds of prey. The conceptual metaphor, though, I think is really great equating the passage of time with ice: an iceberg calving off a glacier is birth, melting is ageing, and melting all away is dying. Great stuff!
I think I actually have to give negative brownie points for this one: as much as I appreciate 3 separate orthographies (Kana, Cyrillic, Latin) for some historicity, they are all at odds with the anti-imperialism the brownie criterion requires, and there's no girl power to balance it out.
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Taqồpaq by accruenewblue

Gallus (jungefowl); Hindi-Urdu, Burmese, Thai, Punjabi, Tamil, Indonesian
I'm a little surprised this is, I think, the only truly tonal submission despite all the SEA birds, and it's less synthetic than most in this round of submissions. In either case, this one does a great job of illustrating some tonogenesis and some recent and still very transparent synthetic developments from a formerly isolating language. The tones are simple registers, but they interact with morae in some neat rightwards reassigning sandhi patterns, and they complement a system of 12 vowels in a 3x2x2 matrix of height, frontedness, and roundedness. There's even some vocalic nasal allophones (which is twice now in this round of submissions), and labial consonant-vowel harmony to boot! Grammatically I greatly appreciate all the call-outs for similarities to natural languages, and I wanna shout-out the use of a positive tag question instead of negative. The numbers have this funky sexagesimal base with an octal sub-base and remnants of an old decimal sub-base, which recalls some of the duodecimal remnants in the otherwise decimal system of many European languages.
Taqồpaq's Gallus-inspired phonology includes the tonal system being described as recalling a rooster's crow. The lexicon includes roots for all things chicken, including using the word for 'wattle' as a classifier for hanging things, which is so delightfully what I wanted out of this challenge. The more idiomatic language makes use of chicken behaviours as descriptors: dust baths are metaphors for something useful but not everyone's cup of tea, and continuing to brood after the chicks have hatched is a metaphor for doing a good thing so long it has negative consequences.
Extra brownie points for exalting queen Trưng, first queen of Vietnam, and a nationalist hero who fought against Chinese imperialism. Double whammy right there!
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Ngālin by u/borago_officinalis

Aptenodytes forsteri (emperor penguins); Awabakal, Māori, Norwegian
We already had a penguin splang but this one's a nice twist by focusing on the territorial claims of Antarctica rather than the ranges of more temperate inclined penguins where there are actually native languages. This does a great job of shirking the indigenous implication in the language selection step of the challenge (although I'm very glad to see no English or Spanish), so there's a really neat mix of isolating Māori particles with a fusional Germanic verbal system, and I was able to easily pick up on both reading through the doc. The verb system actually pleases me greatly with a strong/weak contrast and a V2 word order wherein the strong verbs mark tense through stem change and the weak verbs with a tense auxiliary, all whilst maintaining a very Polynesian aesthetic despite the very Germanic number of vowels. The Māori possessive system is also really fun, I think. I can't speak to the Awabakal influences, but I was able to pick up on the one, tiny Mapudungan influence of tone tag particles before it was even explicitly mentioned! Not sure where the negation system came from, but it implicates the weak verbs in a way I so adore. Really sweet, despite the fun grim facts about emperor penguin hatchlings, and I found this one just darling. The myth at the end about how penguins lost their ability to fly is also real treat and is a perfect fit for the project.
Ngālin doesn't have any A. forsteri-inspired phonology, but it makes up for it with the inspired lexicon and idiomatic language. The emperor penguin breeding cycle is detailed with translations for all the important terms along the way, including but not limited to the ritual of transferring egg from mother to father and "motherless" to refer to a newborn, whose mother hasn't yet returned from the sea. There's some great, everyday idioms elided down from full phrases for greeting and consoling another penguin being "which way?" and "next year", and conceptualising a long distance as specifically the distance from colony to see is a nice touch. I also appreciate how the relationship between creche-mates is more important than that between (half-)siblings.
I have to give queen exaltation brownie points purely for the one illustrative example of āmā o pipa "hatchling's mum" grammatically indicating the senior authority of an empress penguin.
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Honourable Mention

I've been kept somewhat apprised of a Urile (North Pacific cormorants) splang by u/PastTheStarryVoids. It's still very much in the works, but it sounds funky with both some polysynthetic flavours, no doubt inspired by some PNW languages, I imagine, and some formorant (cormorant formant) analysis! Keep an eye out for it, I'm sure it'll grace the sub in due time!
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And that's everything I've seen in the time I put together this showcase. I know there were a few among you all who felt inspired but couldn't put anything together during the course of this challenge. I remember mention of a banana and a tree kangaroo splang on the announcement post. If anyone ever uses the challenge to inspire a future project of theirs, please keep me apprised! I'd be interested in seeing them if for nothing else than to see some more projects outside of South Asian and Oceanian birds, as great as those birbs are. I can't believe I didn't see a single monotreme or non-ungulate eutherian, and that there weren't any non-avian reptiles or anything fully aquatic! And no fossil clades, too, for that matter! I'm positive there are the makings of some really funky splangs if the relevant modern continental and climactic boundaries didn't yet exist.
In any case, I hope all parties involved had a great deal of fun through the course of this challenge! I know I did! Until next marrow, bonelickers!

-A vacuum chamber, preferably in a spherical shape -A roughing vacuum pump capable of reaching at least 75 microns vacuum -A secondary high vacuum pump, either a turbo pump or oil diffusion pump -A high voltage supply, preferably capable of at least 40kv 10ma - Must be negative polarity -A high voltage divider probe for use with a digital multimeter -A thermocouple or baratron (of appropriate scale) vacuum gauge -A neutron radiation detector, either a proportional He-3 or BF3 tube with counting instrumentation, or a bubble dosimeter -A Geiger counter, preferably a scintillator type, for x-ray detection and safety -Deuterium gas (can be purchased as a gas or extracted from D2O through electrolysis - it is much easier and more effective to use compressed gas) -A large ballast resistor in the range of 50-100k and at least a foot long -A camera and TV display for viewing the inside of the reactor -Lead to shield the camera viewport -General engineering tools, a machine shop if at all possible (although 90% of mine was built with nothing but a dremel and cordless drill, the only thing you really can't build without a shop is scratch building the vacuum chamber)

Step 1: Assemble the Vacuum Chamber

A quality high vacuum chamber is required for the fusor to operate. Sometimes an appropriate chamber can be found on eBay, but generally it is best to make one. Parts can be scrounged for several hundred dollars, or purchased new for $500+.
Get two stainless steel hemispheres, purchase two corresponding conflat-flanges (8" flanges in my case), bore out holes for accessory flanges, and then TIG weld it all together. Flanges are typically either of the KF or the conflat style. Conflat can be seen in the image below as the flanges with bolts, and KF (kwik-flange) are seen as those with only clamps holding an o-ring on the mating surface. Only weld on the inside, never on the outside (since virtual leaks can be formed if both inside and outside are welded). If you've never TIG welded before, it would be wise to have someone with experience do it as the welds must be flawless with no pin-sized holes or porous areas to hold a vacuum.
After machining, thoroughly clean the chamber and avoid getting fingerprints in it since these will outgas, which means at vacuum pressure molecules in the oil of finger prints or machining oil will become vapor and make it hard to maintain plasma stability or reach a good ultimate vacuum level.

Step 2: Prepare the High Vacuum Pump

Install the oil diffusion pump (or turbo pump if you have a bit of luck scrounging or a higher budget). Fill the pump with quality diffusion pump oil to whatever fill level the pump documentation suggests, attach the inlet to a valve which then connects to the chamber (see diagram), and attach the outlet to a mechanical backing pump capable of reaching at least around 75 microns (any higher and the diffusion pump will not operate properly or the oil will oxidize quickly).
Make sure the pump is sufficiently cooled, many oil diffusion pumps require water cooling, smaller ones such as the one pictured can get by with a decent air flow.
Once this is assembled, turn on the mechanical pump and wait for the vacuum to reach at least 75 microns. Next you can test the high vacuum pump by turning on the boiler on the diffusion pump. After it warms up (could take a while), the vacuum should rapidly drop below the single micron range.

Step 3: Build Inner Grid

The inner grid (where the high voltage is applied) must now be built and attached to a high voltage feedthrough.
It is best to use a metal such as tungsten for the grid wires since it has a very high melting point, and the grid will get extremely hot during high power runs.
This can be built however you wish, as long as it resembles a spherical shape of roughly 1-1.5 inches in diameter (for a 6-8" chamber), it should work fine.
The grid should be internally attached to an electrical feedthrough such as the one pictured in the second image. This feedthrough needs to be rated for the cathode voltage that will be used, typically 40kv is a good target voltage.

Step 4: Assemble the Deuterium System

Deuterium gas is used as the fuel for this fusion reactor. You will need to purchase a tank of this gas (unless you wish to do electrolysis on heavy water, this process will not be documented here but nothing more than a small Hoffman Apparatus is required - higher purity gas can be gotten from a compressed tank).
Attach a high pressure regulator directly to the tank, add an extremely fine-metering needle valve after this (or a laser drilled orifice in the range of 5 microns), then attach this to the chamber. A ball valve can also be installed between the regulator and the needle valve since needle valves are not shutoff valves.
See the attached diagram now updated with the deuterium handling system.

Step 5: High Voltage

If you can purchase a power supply (occasionally but not commonly found surplus) appropriate for fusion use, the high voltage becomes very simple. Simply take the output of the 40kv negative supply and attach it to the chamber with a physically large high voltage 50-100k ohm ballast resistor in series (large enough that its length will not flash-over if 40kv is applied to it in a plasma run-away or arc discharge).
The difficulty is that it is often difficult if not impossible to find an appropriate fully assembled DC supply of this voltage level that is affordable to the amateur scientist.
Pictured is my high frequency ferrite transformer pair, with a 4-stage multiplier seen behind it.
If a fully assembled power supply (typically manufactured by either Glassman or Spellman), there are a few options: -Find an x-ray transformer, and if necessary either reverse the rectifiers for negative polarity or add rectifiers if it has none (an x-ray transformer core won't have rectifiers, it probably will if it is in its oil tank) -Build a switching high frequency ferrite power supply. This is what I did, however it requires a bit of EE experience since several aspects must be resonant and if it is ever taken out of tune, the transistors will burn out. Probably not the best option for people with little electrical background.

Step 6: Setup Neutron Detection

The proof of fusion (and a quantitative analysis of how much fusion) is obtained through detecting neutron radiation, the byproduct of a D-D fusion reaction. There are three options which will be described. They are in order of descending ease of setup.
-A Neutron Bubble Dosimeter A bubble dosimeter is a small unit with a gel in it that forms bubbles when ionized by neutron radiation. This is the easiest form of neutron detection available since all you have to do is unscrew the top and set it next to the fusor. Some of the drawbacks are that it is an integrative detector which means all you get is a total neutron emission number over the time that it was used, rather than an instantaneous neutron rate. Additionally, they are somewhat hard to get since the only company to make them is Bubbletech in Canada, which has a minimum order of 3 with steep shipping and handling (expect to spend $700+ if ordering directly from them not in a group buy). Additionally, they tend to be fairly worn out after a year of shelf life (although I've kept mine in a refrigerated storage container at 50*F and it seems to be like new after I think more than a year). The advantage is that calibration data is provided with purchase and of course it is easy.
-Silver Activation When silver is placed near the reactor (with a moderator [paraffin wax, water, HDPE, etc] between it and the neutron source, since only thermal neutrons will activate the material) it becomes slightly radioactive with decent neutron fluxes. It has a short half life of only a few minutes, but if you quickly put a geiger counter next to the silver, counts can be detected. In my best runs, I have gotten a piece of silver to about 250CPM over background on a CDV-700 geiger-counter. The disadvantages of this are that it requires a decent neutron flux (at least about 100,000 neutrons/s) which is above the average "beginner's first run" neutron rate. Also, it is somewhat difficult to calibrate, and the counts can't be taken until after the fusor has been shut off.
-A Proportional Tube Tubes can be purchased which are filled with either BF3 or Helium-3 (some very old tubes are Boron-10 lined inert gas tubes). These tubes, similar to a geiger counter, can be used with a counting device to detect electrical pulses when neutrons pass through the tube. Either an all-in-one counter can be used, often made by a company called Ludlum, or a modular counting system can be made using NIM modules. The tube is surrounded by about 2 inches of moderating material such as wax or water. This is by far the most accurate and useful form of neutron detection, however the cost of a new tube is prohibitive to most people, and they are extremely rare on the surplus market. Also, counting equipment can become quite costly.
NIM Configuration: If you chose to make a NIM setup as I have, the typical layout is a charge sensitive pre-amplifier at the head of the proportional tube, which is plugged into both a high voltage power supply generating positive polarity voltage appropriate for the tube (in the range of 800V-2kV generally). The amplifier also hooks into a shaping amplifier, which is followed by a Single Channel Analyzer (for setting the detection discrimination level), followed by a pulse counter and/or rate meter.
Shown in the first picture is my NIM setup, the second picture is the pre-amplifier attached to a moderated helium-3 tube, the third picture is a bubble detector after being exposed to neutrons.

Step 7: Fire It Up (and Cross Your Fingers)

Time to turn it on (don't forget to cover any viewports/cameras with lead! Also x-rays can pour out of ceramic feedthroughs so point them away from people. It is a good idea to be monitoring for x-rays where any people are present). The basic procedure is:
-Turn on the roughing pump and wait for sufficient backing pressure, turn on the diffusion or turbo pump and wait for it to fully warm up or achieve running speed -Throttle the chamber back (with the valve between the diffusion/turbo pump and the chamber) -Ever so slightly open the needle valve to the deuterium tank -Turn up the high voltage until either plasma establishes on the camera, or you've reached 40kv and nothing has happened (don't forget, you only get one chance in your life to screw up with voltages of this degree) -If nothing has happened, keep admitting more gas and the pressure should keep going up. Plasma should form around 40kv at about 10-15 microns of deuterium.
If all goes well, you should see on your camera the image below, and you should be detecting neutrons at this point.
Operation is quite a balancing act, since the voltage is controlled by both the power supply, but also by Paschen's Curve and Ohm's Law relating to the pressure in the chamber. Great patience is required to "Get the hang of it", but after doing so it becomes quite simple to run. Operation can be aided by an ion-gun which will not be discussed in this article.

I used to roll my eyes when my teacher would pull out the chunky, totally 80's overhead projector in class. Don't get me wrong, I appreciated her dedication to our learning, but things like projectors and chalkboards seemed so...antiquated. Fast forward a few years, I'm now the one in front of the classroom, and let me tell you, things have changed dramatically - and for the better.
I recently introduced a virtual reality (VR) system in my geology class. I know, pretty hi-tech for a bunch of rocks and dirt. But here's the thing, instead of looking at 2D diagrams or pictures of landscapes, my students can now virtually step into the Grand Canyon or stroll around the foot of Mount Everest. The level of engagement and excitement I see in them while 'visiting' these geological sites is astounding and heartening. Suddenly, a subject that was once considered 'boring' has become the highlight of their school day. I mean, who wouldn't want to take a break from equations and grammar to trek around the Amazon rainforest?
But the benefits don't stop at student engagement. With VR, I can also bring in experts from around the world. Last week we had a virtual Q&A with a volcanologist from Hawaii - IN CLASS! The innovation in education technology has allowed educators like me to broaden the horizons of our students, making learning not just informative but also incredibly fun.
P.S. Oh by the way, the whole VR thing is just a hypothetical scenario (I wish my school budget allowed for VR setups). But it is an excellent illustration of the 'First Principles' mental model. You strip down a concept to its fundamental truths and then build up from there. In this case, the fundamental truth is our need to understand the world around us. From here, we build up using the best tools available. And right now, those tools are hi-tech and pretty damn cool! So, chalkboard, it's been real, but this teacher is diving headfirst into the 21st century!

Someone tossed an old construction diagram at me that made me go hmmmmmm....It is stamped by a surveyor who has passed and his firm does not exist anymore.
Boundary surveyors don't do this right? Item 3 really has me going "this is SUS".
Is this really an as-built survey's measurements being taken too far and pretending it's a boundary survey, or a construction guy doing something weird right? Is there a world where this isn't sus?

1. It's in an old subdivision in a 13 original colony's state without mandatory recording.
   
2. This lot is shown on this construction diagram to have measurements portrayed (and drawn to scale) to be exactly 50.00' wide
   
3. Both pairs of front/back calls and left/right side calls for the lot are the same size and angle exactly to the second/hundredths. A perfect parallelogram in a century old development.
   
4. The construction diagram only shows a single pin on the property labeled *anything*, and that is a found item. There is a neighbor's pin a bit away across a gore which is supposedly that depth (but shouldn't be by his deed either).
   
5. When you take a physical scale to the diagram, all the side measurements, etc are the size portrayed, but, the lot itself is about a foot deeper than the survey calls say.
   
6. The homeowneconstruction company filed deeds which changed the lot dimensions around the same time and noted the pins were found, not set. It grew almost a foot on paper, and apparently more in reality.
   
7. Even worse: when you pick up a scale and hold it on the diagram, the lot is even deeper by another foot or slightly less.
   

All the side measurements are to scale in the diagram. Area calculations on the buildings match the scale as well. Is this a "homeowneconstruction firm misunderstood an as-built and went wild"? You might be going "that's like only a foot or two of "bonus claimed land", who cares".
There are private road courses and easements affected by this "magic growth", magically gaining a "bump" right here after this, which makes them navigationally (and construction wise) harder to handle.
I'm really looking for an innocent explanation here. I don't see one. Do you?

Hi Reddit community.
I am trying to decide between DLD (prob Alchemy or Pursuit) vs Toetem Blackbear 2.0 for a travel (city, beach & nature) and hiking sandal. Never owned a minimalist sandal before.
Anyone have any experience with either or both brands? What was your use case and how well did they meet it? How has the webbing felt, how easy were they to adjust, how comfortable were they generally and specifically re the toe cord etc?
Also, as regards sizing, how "snug" were your feet in the print out size diagrams both companies offer? Did people go for the tighter fit, or allow for a bit of room, say in case one's foot expands? How did the actual sandals correspond to the fit you thought you were getting? Any advice if one falls between sizes?
From my review of the various commentary out there (although Toetem seems to have less, prob for being a newer company), DLDs provide more customisation and foot shapes, allowing for a more bespoke look and fit (even permitting a fully bespoke footbed), whereas the Toetems seem like they have super comfortable straps as well as easy/secure adjustment system that completely takes the stress out of buying minimalist active-wear huaraches, esp when one can not try on in store.
Any views most assuredly welcome.

PART ONE THOUSAND AND TWENTY
[Previous Chapter] [The Beginning] [Patreon+2]
Sunday
Without Maddy in the room, things became rather heated between the humans and Llyr, with Sam’s dad absolutely refusing to budge on his stance despite how ridiculous he was being. Tiacor warned Miss W to calm down as her agitation was beginning to aggravate her young, and everyone agreed to sit down rather than stand and shout.
Lucas sat between Levi and Sam’s parents, for despite Maddy being the source of the argument and Levi being her father, Lucas had a better chance of reasoning with Llyr. Or, at the very least, not get murdered by him. That would upset both Sam and Miss W.
The final push to end the argument abruptly came from an unlikely source. Robbie walked through the door with his arms full of bags and grocery boxes, not all of which were labelled in English. The guy had gone on an international shopping trip.
“Hey,” he said, until the vibe of the room hit him with all the finesse of a Mack truck, and he drew to a halt in front of Llyr’s chair. “What’s going on?” His tone was cautious.
“Llyr doesn’t want Maddy to stay here in case she hurts Miss W,” Lucas said, bringing the situation down to its bare bones.
“No problem. Tiacor is always with Miss W,” Larry said, following Robbie in with bags of his own. “And with our speed, the kid won’t do squat that we can’t intercept.” He lifted his gaze to the true gryps healer standing in the walkway between the sofa and the kitchen island behind Miss W. “And why didn’t you say that?”
“Ivy is my charge,” Tiacor answered, standing her ground. “Not what happens to others in this household.”
Larry nudged Robbie to keep going and followed him into the kitchen. “You gotta get with the program, girl,” he growled, placing the bags on the island so he could do a slow helicopter-style circle with one finger while death-staring at Tiacor. “This whole apartment is part of the assignment. Every person staying here is important to the health and well-being of everyone else. You can’t do your job if you don’t see that, and I can’t believe I’m the one telling you. You’re the healer.”
Tiacor tensed, almost as if she were about to argue, but then she relaxed and nodded in agreement with the reprimand.
Robbie opened Voila and began putting all manner of grocery items in it, many of which Lucas didn’t recognise. Even the cold and frozen went in, though Lucas didn’t draw any attention to that fact.
As he worked, Larry went back outside and brought in more bags.
“Feeding an army?” Levi asked as he and Lucas both got up to help.
Lucas grabbed his brother by the shoulder and shoved him back into his seat. “Get off your busted foot, you moron,” he said and went down the gap between Sam’s parents and the coffee table.
“Always,” Robbie laughed at Levi’s comment while Lucas waited for Larry to come through with his next load before heading into the hallway outside. “I normally do this through the night, but I was kinda busy last night with Charlie.” He waggled his eyes. “If you get my drift.”
“Really?!” Levi groused while Lucas laughed at his indignation. “You have to talk about our sister like that?”
“You know he loves her, so shut up,” Lucas snarked, passing through the alcove and out the front door. It was a good thing he’d offered – there were like fifty more bags out there. Robbie must have remembered Levi and Maddy were in the apartment and came through the front door carrying only what was humanly possible. He leaned back into the apartment. “Ummm…Llyr, you wanna come help with all of this? I don’t think he left anything in any of the shops.”
Lucas fully expected Llyr to ignore the request and was mildly surprised when he appeared a few seconds later to help.
“I never said I didn’t want the child staying with us,” Llyr said, sliding several bags onto his arms and gathering more handles in his hands. “I said I wouldn’t be responsible for my actions should the child accidentally harm Ivy or worse. And if you think I’m alone in that mindset, you haven’t looked in on Sam lately. He’s terrified for his mother’s well-being.”
“I did see that at the party yesterday,” Lucas admitted, having been caught by surprise at Sam’s explosion at Jonathan.
Between the two of them, they grabbed over half of the remaining bags before Llyr spoke again. “So long as Ivy is protected, I genuinely have no problem with it.”
Which meant they’d been arguing for well over an hour for nothing. Dammit, Tiacor.
Robbie then unpacked some things into the fridge and the pantry, but those were items that the household would be grabbing out for themselves as snacks—things like ice cream and potato chips.
Once all the groceries were inside, Lucas went back into the alcove. He grabbed the larger clothes bags that held two sets of summer clothes, two sets of winter clothes, a summer and a winter pair of pyjamas and underwear, all in Levi’s size (Lucas knew the sizing, for despite being taller, Levi was a size smaller than Lucas and always had been).
He brought it back into the room and tossed it on the sofa beside his brother, where he’d been sitting.
Levi began pulling it out, quickly realising it was all for him. “What the hell is all this?” he demanded.
“I’ve seen what you look like when you stagger in after an emergency call-out. If it comes down to it, you can crash here until you can see through both eyes. I’m not putting Maddy in a car with you when you’re wrecked like that. I’ll arrest your sorry ass first.”
“You’re not paying for all of this…”
“For God’s sake, Levi. Will you just say ‘thank you’ and go and get changed?”
“This is crap,” Levi snapped instead.
“You talk like that in front of your little girl?” Miss W asked, arching her eyebrow reprimandingly.
Levi’s eyes dropped to the coffee table. “No, ma’am.”
“Good. Then go and get changed, and let Lucas wash the rest.” Her parental gaze then skewered Lucas next. “You were going to wash all those new clothes for them, weren’t you?”
Lucas wasn’t dumb enough to look at Robbie, who had been doing the laundry for everyone since … forever. “Yes, ma’am.”
Ivy smirked. “Good answer.” She clambered awkwardly to her feet, and Llyr was right there to help her. “I’m thinking I might go out for a bit this afternoon. Head into the office and see what’s been going on while I’ve been on leave.”
“Ivy, it’s Sunday,” Llyr argued.
“And if you think that matters to Ben Pomerac, it’s been too long since you’ve interacted with him, boo. Come on. You two got along like a house on fire before.”
“We were passionate about the cause,” Llyr agreed, letting her move ahead of him down the hallway towards their room.
“Would you like me to throw you together a picnic lunch to take with you?” Robbie called after them.
“Yes, please!” Miss W called back.
“Wow,” Levi said after they were gone, and Robbie had turned his back on them to busy himself in the kitchen, over-enunciating the syllable.
Lucas smirked at his brother. “I know, right? Reminds you of a certain matriarch in our family, doesn’t it?”
“That woman would eat Mom for breakfast.”
“I dare you to tell either of them that.”
“Hell no. I like breathing.” Levi then looked at the clothes. “I do appreciate this, Luk—as. But are you sure I can’t…?”
“Positive. I’m saving hundreds of dollars every week by living here rent and board free.”
“Wait, you don’t even pay for food or utilities or anything?”
Lucas shook his head. “I told you Llyr…”
“Yeah, but that’s Llyr. Robbie just paid a fortune for food…”
“And if you can get him to accept my money, you’re better than me. He’s even managed to put a block on money transfers from any of us after Boyd and I tried to sneakily put it into his account. He’s told us flat, ‘When you have even close to the same amount of money in your account that I do, then you can start paying your way. Not before’.”
“But he’s got millions in his account!”
“Yes, I do,” Robbie said cheerily from the kitchen, still putting together the picnic lunch as fast as humanly possible. “And if I wanna feed Lucas and anybody else in this place, it’s no one’s business but mine.”
“But you’re turning him into a kept man.”
Robbie’s scowl was instantaneous, with Lucas not far behind him. “Really?” Robbie growled. “That’s your read on this? That me sharing my good fortune with my best friends, who I happen to live with, is your idea of making your brother a kept man?” Robbie shook his head and made a negative buzzer noise. “No one is kept here, bozo, and I like cooking for everyone. The ingredients I use now are ridiculously expensive, and I’d never ask any of them to hand over that kind of money. This is my gift to them, and you aren’t taking that away from me.”
Lucas looked at his brother and arched a ‘tolja so’ eyebrow at him. “And I’m paying that gift forward with stuff you and Maddy need. So going back to what I said earlier, say, ‘thank you’ and go and get dressed before I kick your sorry tail down the hall.”
Levi climbed to his feet, hopping once to balance his weight on his medical boot. He then held his hand out to his brother. “Thanks, Lucas.”
Lucas took the hand and pulled him into a back-slapping embrace. “Anytime.”
“What clothes did you get Maddy?”
Lucas shrugged. “I’ve no idea. The shop assistant helped me out.”
“Good lord, do I even want to know how much they cleaned you out for?”
“Actually, she felt sorry for me since I was standing in the middle of the kid’s clothing section and wondering where the hell to start.” With an evil grin, he added, “Oh, I did buy something else for Maddy.”
Levi squinted one eye without saying a word, waiting for him to come clean.
“They had these cute little vet kits in the toy section. I bought her one of each.”
“Are you going to help me pay for her college degree in veterinary science?” Levi grumbled half-heartedly.
“If that’s what she wants out of life, absolutely. You’re a single dad trying to do it all on your own. It’s commendable but dumb. In fact, are you okay with me starting a college fund for her using the money I don’t spend here anymore?”
Levi huffed out a frustrated breath. “I don’t know, man. It seems … I don’t want you to think that’s…”
“You really don’t want to finish that sentence,” Lucas warned.
Levi snapped his mouth shut and breathed silently through his nose for a beat. “Well, I suppose a college fund … to be added to what I put away,” Levi insisted, determined to save some face in the matter.
Lucas knew ol’ bat ears in the kitchen would’ve heard every word, and whatever funds Maddy needed for her education would be paid for in full the day she signed up for the courses, regardless of whether the money was there or not. Charlie would probably want to pitch in as well when she found out, and Maverick had been riding Levi hard about letting him help pay for Maddy’s education, but somehow, in his brother’s eyes, it had seemed so wrong.
In this case, Lucas was simply forwarding money that should have been earmarked for something else. “Done,” he said before Levi could change his mind. He would need to check with the rest of the family to see if anyone else had the same idea but was doing it on the sly.
Their parents were at the top of that list, having put their oldest two through college. They hadn’t needed to with the rest since Maverick landed a full athletic scholarship, he and Levi had left school (ignoring the stint in rehab for his busted leg) and gone into emergency services, and Charlie went straight into Paul’s auto shop.
As such, Lucas was willing to bet that four-person nest egg was still sitting there, waiting for the grandkids to reach that age. It’d be weird if they all rocked up on day one of Maddy’s higher education, each with thousands of dollars to pay for the same courses.
Levi grabbed one of the summer sets of clothes and a pair of underwear and made his way around the sofa to the room he and Maddy had shared.
As soon as the door shut, Robbie stopped prepping the picnic lunch and realm-stepped away. Movement in the alcove said he hadn’t gone far. “What are you doing?” Lucas demanded, rounding the corner to see Robbie grabbing out fistfuls of clothing from the bags and dumping them on the floor. He stayed in the doorway to keep an eye out for Levi.
“Giving everything a quick clean,” Robbie answered without stopping. “Keep a lookout for me, will you?”
“Already am.” A couple of minutes later, his brother hobbled into the living room. “All good, bro?” he asked, more for Robbie than Levi.
“I’m still not overly comfortable with all this,” his older brother admitted.
Robbie swept all of the clothes he’d cleaned into Lucas’ arms and then realm-stepped away while he was still hidden from Levi’s sight. It took Lucas a hot minute to realise that, in doing so, the two brothers had been left alone for the first time since Levi and Maddy stayed over.
Thanks … this isn’t awkward at all, he thought to himself as Levi stared at the clothes in his arms. “Umm … this is pretty much all the clothes I got for Maddy…” he hedged, hoping like crap his brother would accept the gift without having another meltdown.
He braced himself for either when Levi hobbled around the sofas to reach him and pulled out a rainbow-striped dress with ruffles around the hem and on the thin shoulder straps. The torso was drawn in with a thick band of elastic. “I’m glad you told me the sales clerk helped you,” he said, grabbing a pair of underwear and breaking the tags off both with his teeth. “There’s no way you’d have picked this, and she’ll love it.”
“I bought shoes and slippers for her, too, in case you had to grab her from daycare or something and didn’t have time to go home.”
“Are you okay if I add you and whoever else you recommend to her pickup roster, in case I have to go straight in?"
"Sure," Lucas agreed, mad that he wasn't already ON that roster.
Levi nodded, still staring at the dress. "We’ll leave her shoes here,” he said, his emotions finally getting the better of him. “She can wear the pair she wore yesterday home.”
Lucas dumped the rest of the clothes on Llyr’s chair, gripped his brother’s shoulders and squeezed. “We’re family, man. If our positions were reversed, you’d do all this and more for me. It’s what family does.”
Levi nodded with a pinched smile that fought against the tears welling in his eyes, and then he bowed his head and rested it on his brother’s shoulder. Lucas hugged him close until he broke away with a silent sniff that was meant to appear like a sinus cleanse and headed down Llyr’s side of the apartment in search of his daughter.
“We’re all here for you, man,” Lucas whispered to his retreating back. "You don't have to do it alone."
* * *
((All comments welcome. Good or bad, I’d love to hear your thoughts 🥰🤗))
I made a family tree/diagram of the Mystallian family that can be found here
For more of my work, including WPs: Angel466 or an index of previous WPS here.
FULL INDEX OF BOB THE HOBO TO DATE CAN BE FOUND HERE!

Hi All! As the title says, I have a 2012 Sportage SX that is giving me a B2415 code for a Passenger Air Mix Door motoactuator. I have a replacement motor and purchased 72 hour access to the Kia Global Information System for access to the service manual. However I'm stuck. There is a duct called a "shower duct - foot" that is in the way. Even the service manual says to remove it, but for the life of me I cannot figure out how.
Does anyone here know how? The right side (exit, right under glove box) has a small square-ish slot that goes over a tab sticking down from the blower plastic. On the left side where it connects lto the heater it looks like it has a pull tab. However when I try to pop it loose the part itself seems like its coming apart and I can't get it out. What am I missing?
Here's a link to the part I'm trying to remove. I know its a parts dealer, but they have a diagram showing where it connects to the heater and parts information about it. Also I was leery about what I can post from KGIS.
https://www.kiapartsnow.com/genuine/kia-duct-shower-foo~972822s000.html
Any help would be appreciated. If I have to, I'll break it since it looks like a cheap part, but I dont want to do that if I can avoid it. Also I dont want to break anything else while doing it.
Thanks!

I am very sad and I need help. My 1995 Trans Am was working fine but the headlights were very dim, the front turn signal was out, and one of the reverse lights was out. I thought these were things I could take care of myself. I was wrong.
The story starts last November when I bought LED headlights and an LED turn signal bulb. These were recommended to me by my then housemate, who was helping me and appeared to know what he was talking about. When we took the old headlights out, one of them broke so now we were committed to the replacement. Unfortunately, the new ones had a different connector type so we spent hours driving around trying to find a solution. No luck so I ordered a converter cable online, which took a very long time to arrive.
Meanwhile, we replaced the turn signal bulb. As you can imagine, this was a bad idea and the turn signals on that side went a bit crazy. Some research led to the ordering of a turn signal relay for LEDs and the replacement of all the turn signal bulbs with LEDs. Why did I not just go back to a standard bulb on the one that was out? I don't know but I really wish I had.
In order to get to the turn signal bulbs in the back, the whole rear light assembly must be removed. I also needed to replace one of the reverse light bulbs so that was ok. That bulb socket was super corroded so I ordered a new one, which wasn't the right style, so I ordered another new one, which fit. Meanwhile, the car isn't being driven, it has no headlights, and the rear light assembly has been off for weeks. Several of the other light sockets and/or their wiring were in bad shape so I just ordered a whole new set of them. I bought the wiring diagrams for the car to ensure I did everything right and I have double checked them all. All the rear sockets have been replaced and there is a new bulb in every one.
In the middle of all this, I went on several work trips that kept me out of the country for most of January and February. Then I had foot surgery in February. My housemate kept saying he would get everything fixed and buttoned back up but he never did. I have now kicked him out for other reasons. I was unable to walk until late March and by then I was pretty depressed about the whole thing. I started working on this again in late May. At some point, one of the light assembly parts and all the screws were misplaced so I bought new ones. The LED headlights have also disappeared so I just bought regular ones. The headlights are now installed, all the rear light sockets are on with new bulbs, and I have double checked all the fuses are correct.
The problem happened in stages. When the rear sockets were replaced, all the rear lights worked except for the turn signal lights, but the ones that did work all flashed like a turn signal when the brakes were pressed. I tried swapping them all out for regular (vs LED) but that did not help. I double checked the wiring again and they are all wired properly. Then I installed the headlights, which I did by manually raising them. Once I did that, when I turned the headlights on, they would flip down and the lights would come on. When I turned them off, they would flip up and the lights would go off. I never did anything with the headlight wiring so this makes no sense. I tried various combinations of manually operating them and turning them on and off but no luck. In my fuse check, I noted that the turn signal fuse was 30A but should be 15, so I replaced the fuse and the turn signal relay. This all happened over the last several weeks.
Today, I have everything installed and now nothing works. I charged the battery; the battery charger says it is at 12.7V. Nada. No lights, car won't even try to start. Everything is dead. I give up. What do I do??? Is there something I overlooked? The lights worked just a week or so ago. Should I have it towed somewhere? I am obviously going to just keep making the problem worse. I am beyond depressed about this car. I am in Houston, TX if anyone knows a person or shop that could deal with this.

(a mere abstract likely has 1-3 pages), plus my own remarks and bolding especially interesting bits. I use free pdfcreator to create a pdf file for myself when 'printing'/saving studies that do not provide .pdf file downloading.
201101 Exercise on Bone Structure jcem0955

Independent and Combined Effects of Calcium-Vitamin D3 and Exercise on Bone Structure and Strength in Older Men: An 18-Month Factorial Design Randomized Controlled Trial by Sonja Kukuljan, 9pp

Men assigned to fortified milk consumed 400 ml/d of 1% fat milk containing 1000 mg/d calcium and 800 IU/d vitamin D3 Conclusion: A community-based multi-component exercise program successfully improved LS and femoral neckBMDand strength in healthy older men, but providing additional calcium -vitamin D3 to these replete men did not enhance the osteogenic response. there is no reason to suggest that calcium in excess of requirements or circulating 25(OH)D levels higher than a particular thresh old will enhance BMD, bone structure, or strength in response to a given dose of loading. a 10-month trial in Chinese postmenopausal women who had habitually low calcium intakes (275 mg/d) reported that supplementation with 800 mg/d of calcium for 10 months enhanced the effects of load bearing exercise on femoral neck aBMD (19).
Exercise program ((fully details were included)) Supervised exercise training was performed on three nonconsecutive days per week for 18 months in one of four community leisure facilities under the supervision of qualified exercise trainers. After 18 months, exercise resulted in significant net gains in femoral neck aBMD [1.9% (95% CI, 1.2, 2.5)], cross-sectional area (CSA) [1.8% (95% CI, 0.8, 2.7)], and section modulus [2.1% (95% CI, 0.5, 3.6)] as well as lumbar spine trabecular vBMD [2.2% (95% CI, 0.2, 4.1)] relative to no-exercise.
201107 prescribing exercise QQ_PS_MSSE_July_2011

Quantity and Quality of Exercise for Developing and Maintaining Cardiorespiratory, Musculoskeletal, and Neuromotor Fitness in Apparently Healthy Adults: Guidance for Prescribing Ex... by Carol Ewing Garber 27pp

TABLE 1. Summary of the general evidence relevant to the exercise prescription.
((extremely detailed study, eg.*)) Holding a stretch for 10–30 s at the point of tightness or slight discomfort enhances joint range of motion, with little apparent benefit resulting from longer durations Older persons may realize greater improvements in range of motion with longer durations (30–60 s) of stretching Reducing total time spent in sedentary pursuits and interspersing short bouts of physical activity and standing between periods of sedentary activity should be a goal for all adults, irrespective of their exercise habits.
201206 effects of aging, physical training, nihms547430

The effects of aging, physical training, and a single bout of exercise on mitochondrial protein expression in human skeletal muscle by Zoltan Boria 22pp

Mitochondrial fission is impaired by aging and could be one of the most sensitive markers of the age-associated decline in the adaptive response to physical activity. regular physical activity could attenuate the age-associated decline in important physiological functions Mitochondrial fission appears to be impaired by aging, at least at the level of gene expression, and to be one of the most sensitive markers of the age-associated decline in adaptive responses to physical activity.
201208 Effects of Yoga on Older Adults Patel2012

The Effects of Yoga on Physical Functioning and Health Related Quality of Life in Older Adults: A Systematic Review and Meta-Analysis by Neela K Patel 18pp

Conclusions: Small studies with mixed methodological quality suggested that yoga may be superior to conventional physical-activity interventions in elderly people. The precision of the estimates remains low.
201212 Yoga Program Improved Balance glt087

A 12-Week Iyengar Yoga Program Improved Balance and Mobility in Older Community-Dwelling People: A Pilot Randomized Controlled Trial by Anne Tiedemann, 8pp

12-week, twice-weekly yoga program focused on standing postures Primary outcome was standing balance component of the short physical performance battery with addition of one-legged stance time (standing balance). Secondary outcomes were the timed sit-to-stand test, timed 4-m walk, one-legged stand with eyes closed, and Short Falls Efficacy Scale-International. Feasibility was measured by recording class attendance and adverse events. Short Portable Mental Status Questionnaire) (12),
The balance challenge increased over time by gradually increasing the difficulty of the postures performed, commencing with low levels of challenge such as performing a half knee squat with feet side by side and arms extended above the head (known as “mountain pose”) and progressing the challenge over time to postures such as one-legged standing with arms extended above the head and the nonsupport foot placed on the thigh of the support leg (known as “tree pose”). Poses were modified to suit individual ability, with some participants initially requiring upper limb support (eg, leaning on a wall) to perform the most challenging postures. The ultimate goal, however, was that toward the end of the 12-week program, all participants would be performing the poses with minimal upper limb support.
((includes diagrams of poses)) Table 1. The Yoga Protocol and Modifications to Poses to Account for Varying Physical Abilities
Twenty-two (81%) people reported enjoying the program and 19 people (70%) felt confident they would continue to take part in yoga classes after study conclusion. the sit-to-stand test and walking speed timed for 6 m are valid predictors of falls in older people (2,26). Adherence was promoted by cohesive group dynamics, gradual increases in program intensity, and strong instructor leadership. The feasibility and enjoyment of yoga among older people should not be underestimated. Poor rates of uptake and adherence to exercise for fall prevention among older people clearly demonstrate the need for evidence-based programs that are also popular choices among older people. Much greater participation is required to have a substantial public health impact.
201300 exercise on bone density in middle-aged and older men

The effect of physical exercise on bone density in middle-aged and older men: a systematic review by KA Bolam 3pp

Bone mass density was significantly increased in most of the resistance-training interventions. Only one trial (90 participants) reported a significant difference in favour of exercise compared with the control for bone mass density of the femoral neck.
201300 strengthening and high-impact exercises on bone metabolism and quality of life in postmenopausal women

The effects of strengthening and high-impact exercises on bone metabolism and quality of life in postmenopausal women: a randomized controlled trial Hande Basat 2pp

Our data suggest that 6-month supervised high-impact exercise training can be effective in prevention of bone loss at lumbar spine and femoral neck. These data also indicate that both supervised training programs improve HRQoL in postmenopausal women.
201400 Rest Intervals Reduce the Number of Loading Bouts Required nihms626489

Rest Intervals Reduce the Number of Loading Bouts Required to Enhance Bone Formation by Sundar Srinivasan, 17pp

rest-inserted loading holds potential to retain the osteogenic benefits of mechanical loading with significantly reduced frequency of bouts of activity while also enabling greater flexibility in the timing of the activity. it may be possible to design rest-inserted exercise interventions in humans that require substantially reduced time and effort compared with repetitive cyclic exercise while maintaining, or potentially augmenting, the osteogenic benefit derived from the intervention.
201400 Strontium -- Bone quality and bone strength 20-24

Bone quality and bone strength: benefits of the bone-forming approach by Giovanni Iolascon 5pp

therapeutic strategies to increase bone strength consist in improving both bone quantity and quality through physiatric interventions (e.g. physical exercises), nutritional approach, vitamin D and calcium supplementation, micronutrients supplementation, biophysics stimulation and drug therapy. since the late 90’s when it was clear from the results of clinical trials upon efficacy of several anti-osteoporotic drugs that BMD increase did not reflect a proportional reduction of relative risk of fracture
Strontium ranelate is an orally active agent consisting of two atoms of stable strontium and an organic moiety (ranelic acid), now considered effective in managing osteoporosis and reducing fracture risk in postmenopausal women. In numerous studies this drug has demonstrated to improve all parameters linked to bone quality and bone strength The 3-year changes in femoral neck BMD explained 74% of the reduction in vertebral fractures observed during treatment with strontium ranelate A post-hoc analysis was performed on DXAs from 79 women out of 189 included in a double blind, double dummy study and randomized to strontium ranelate 2g/day or alendronate 70mg/week during 2 years. The study shows that there is an increase of Spine BMD and TBS on both treatments but a differential effect of alen-dronate and strontium ranelate on bone microarchitecture in particular SrRan has greater effects on bone architecture; in dex at the spine compared to ALN as already described in pQCT and HR-pQCT studies
strontium ranelate represents a unique approach in the management of osteoporosis by its ability to restore the imbalance between bone resorption and formation in favor of bone formation. Its beneficial effects on bone microarchitecture improve the biomechanical properties of bone to resist to fragility fractures.
201405 Effects of Different Types of Jump Impact pone.0107953

Effects of Different Types of Jump Impact on Trabecular Bone Mass and Microarchitecture in Growing Rats by Yong-In Ju 8pp

most studies have focused on the take-off, rather than the landing phase of jumps. Thus, we compared the effects of landing and upward jump impact on trabecular bone mass and microarchitecture. Bone mass ( + was significantly higher in the 40UJ group compared with the J groups +49.1% and 28.3%, respectively), although peak GRF (257.8% and 2122.7%, respectively) and unit time force (221.6% and 236.2%, respectively) were significantly lower in the 40UJ group These results showed that trabecular bone mass in growing rats is increased more effectively by the take off than by the landing phases of jumps The results suggest that local impact accompanied by muscle contraction during jumps plays an important role in enhancing trabecular bone mass compared with impact expressed as GRF.
201407 sedentary behaviour and physical activity with BMD in adults and older adults

Associations between objectively-measured sedentary behaviour and physical activity with bone mineral density in adults and older adults, the NHANES study by S.F.M. Chastin 3pp

• Repeated exposure to sitting in daily life (objectively measured) is negatively associated with femoral bone mineral density in women. • In women, this negative association is seen with longer duration of sitting bouts, as opposed to sitting bout frequency. • This negative association with bone mineral density is independent of level of moderate and vigorous physical activity in women. • In men, however, time spent in moderate and vigorous activity is positively associated with femoral bone mineral density.
Time spent in sedentary behaviour (SB), or time spent in non-exercising seated and reclining postures, has recently emerged as a new public health risk, independent of the amount of time someone spends being active
the duration of SB bouts, rather than their frequency, appears to be deleteriously associated with BMD of the total femur and of all hip sub-regions. In a study of white older women aged 65 and over, the risk of fracture was found to double where those individuals spent 4 h or less standing per day, while the fracture risk was only 30% lower for those who walked regularly [29].
201409 Different Types of Jump Impact

Effects of Different Types of Jump Impact on Trabecular Bone Mass and Microarchitecture in Growing Rats Yong-In Ju 8pp

High-impact and weight bearing activity are generally accepted as being beneficial for strengthening skeletal bone. Among various types of exercise in rats, high-impact loading such as jumping seems to be most beneficial for increasing bone mass and strength rather than low impact loading such as running landing impact is considered more beneficial for building bone mass and increasing strength than take-off impact. (incorrect)
Our results showed that GRF alone cannot account for the impact of jumps on limb bone and suggest that local impact by muscle contraction serves an important role in increasing bone mass. in vivo the results of a human study by Lu et al. [30] .70% showed that of bending moments on a bone during gait are transmitted by force generated from muscle than from external reaction.
201509 Resistance Training 40279_2015_Article_385

Dose–Response Relationships of Resistance Training in Healthy Old Adults: A Systematic Review and Meta-Analysis Ron Borde 28pp

with the largest effect sizes for the longest training periods (mean SMDbs = 2.34; 50–53 weeks), intensities of 70–79 % of the 1RM (mean SMDbs = 1.89), and total time under tension of 6.0 s (mean SMDbs = 3.61). A tendency towards significance was found for rest in between sets (p = 0.06), with 60 s showing the largest effect on muscle strength (mean SMDbs = 4.68; two studies). resistance training (RT) program with the goal to increase healthy old adults’ muscle strength is characterized by a training period of 50–53 weeks, a training intensity of 70–79 % of the one-repetition maximum (1RM), a time under tension of 6 s per repetition, and a rest in between sets of 60 s. Selecting a training frequency of two sessions per week, a training volume of two to three sets per exercise, seven to nine repetitions per set, and a rest of 4.0 s between repetitions could also improve efficacy of training. RT to improve muscle morphology seems to be effective using the following independently computed training variables: a training period of 50–53 weeks, a training frequency of three sessions per week, a training volume of two to three sets per exercise, seven to nine repetitions per set, a training intensity from 51 to 69 % of the 1RM, a total time under tension of 6.0 s, a rest of 120 s between sets, and a 2.5-s rest between repetitions.
With the onset of the sixth decade in life, degenerative processes affect the neuromuscular system in terms of losses in muscle strength (dynapenia) and muscle mass (sarcopenia) [1–3]. Neural (e.g., numerical loss of alpha motoneurons) and morphological factors (e.g., reduced number and size of particularly type-II muscle fibers) as well as their interaction are responsible for age-related declines in muscle strength and mass [4]. There is evidence that muscular weakness is highly associated with impaired mobility and an increased risk for falls [5]. Moreover, lower extremity muscle weakness was identified as the dominant intrinsic fall-risk factor with a five-fold increase in risk of falling [5]. using 60 s produced the largest mean SMDbs short rest intervals between sets resulted in significantly greater increases in leg press 1RM less rest times produced greater levels of fatigue, providing a stimulus which resulted in increases in muscle strength Based on different metabolic and hormonal loads, a narrative review suggested that rest in between sets of 180–300 s is suitable for improvements in maximal strength, 1–2 min for gains in hypertrophy and 30–60 s for improvements in muscle endurance
201511 step_aerobics_on_bone_metabolism_and_functional_fitness

Effects of short-term step aerobics exercise on bone metabolism and functional fitness in postmenopausal women with low bone mass H. J. Wen 9pp

A 10-week group-based step aerobics exercise significantly improved functional fitness in postmenopausal women with low bone mass, and showed a positive trend in reducing resorption activity via bone turnover markers. group-based step aerobics (GBSA) exercise group (EG) Serum bone metabolic markers (C-terminal telopeptide of type 1 collagen [CTX] the percent change for CTX was significantly different between the groups significantly reduced bone resorption activity
Chien et al. discovered that the femoral neck BMD of PMW increased by 6.8 % after the participants performed a 30-min treadmill walking exercise at 70 % VO2max followed by a 10-min stepping exercise (bench height of 20 cm) for 24 weeks, while the BMD of the control group decreased by 1.5 % [10]. the benefits of exercise intervention on bone health can be alternatively indicated by a number of methods other than densitometry. During all the sessions, exercises were accompanied by appropriate music set at a tempo of 120–126 beats per min. Participants were instructed to set the training target zone at the range of 75–85 % of their heart rate reserve and to monitor their HR to determine whether they had reached their target HR zone during the GBSA exercise. When the HR dropped below the target HR zone, participants expanded their movement or increased their step height to ensure that they reached their target HR. The height of the step was initially set at 10 cm and subsequently elevated when the trainng HR was no longer in the target zone. By the end of the training programs, the step height was elevated to 20–25 cm, at which the mean vertical impact force was reported to range from 1.54 to 1.87 × body weight [22, 23]. The average up- and down-step routine during each SA exercise (40–45 min) was 1280–1440 cycles. The training protocol was designed in accordance with the guidelines recommended by ACSM [24].
For the details of the functional fitness testing, please refer to the Senior Fitness Test Manual [27]. The estimated energy expenditure of the EG was increased about 41 % during the intervention period. the 10- week GBSA elicited a trend of downregulating bone resorption activity; this may benefit for bone formation and bone health. Theoretically, the duration of the human bone-remodeling cycle takes about 4–6 months, and the durations of resorption and formation are not evenly divided. Especially for senior participants, factors such as step height and step cadence can be easily adjusted to suit the individual’s ability.
201512 protection of high peak bone mass s00198-015-3467-5

Achieving the protection of high peak bone mass by R. P. Heaney 2pp

A recommendation supporting accumulation of high peak bone mass must confront school budgets that eliminate physical education, plus the endless tweaking of federal school meal programs which, in their dairy component, provide virtually the only bone-building nutrients in the daily diet of many schoolchildren.
201602 Influence_of_Adolescents_Physical_Activity_on_Bon

Influence of Adolescents’ Physical Activity on Bone Mineral Acquisition: A Systematic Review Article Mohamed S. ZULFARINA 13pp

physical activity (PA) peak bone mass (PBM). Conclusion: This study supported the importance of increase adolescents’ regular PA in optimizing PBM thus preventing osteoporosis at later life.
About 26% of adult peak total body bones mineral were accrued during this key time (14-16). Thus, adolescent years could be the final opportunity to maximize PBM. High PBM is an important determinant in preventing osteoporosis and risk of osteoporotic fracture Loaded PA above a physiological threshold or higher than usual forces would elicit osteogenesis response the lack of association at the vertebrae could be explained by the influence of endocrine factors boys have greater bone area while girls have higher bone density. bone responsiveness to mechanical load is limited to load bearing regions. regular PA started at early life particularly during adolescence is the key towards achieving healthy bone and a practical way to overcome the increasing incidence of osteoporosis and future risk of fracture
201608 Exercise to prevent falls in older adults 1750.full

Exercise to prevent falls in older adults: an updated systematic review and meta-analysis Catherine Sherrington, 10pp

exercise reduced the rate of falls in community-dwelling older people by 21% 2.At least 3 hours of exercise should be undertaken each week 3. Ongoing participation in exercise is necessary or benefits will be lost 7. Strength training may be included in addition to balance training high-risk older people should not be told to walk briskly.
201609 BMD is increased after a 16-week resistance training intervention in elderly women

Bone mineral density is increased after a 16-week resistance training intervention in elderly women with decreased muscle strength Ville Huovinen 2pp

Results: Resistance training seemed to increase total hip BMD by 6% Our findings suggest an important role of continuous supervised resistance training for the prevention of osteoporotic fractures in elderly women with decreased muscle strength.
201700 falls elderly drugs and exercise igx004.982

EXERCISE TO PREVENT FALLS IN OLDER ADULTS: AN UPDATED SYSTEMATIC REVIEW AND META-ANALYSIS C. Sherrington 1p

exercise reduced the rate of falls in community dwelling older people by 21% (pooled rate ratio 0.79, with greater effects seen from exercise programs that challenged balance and involved more than three hours per week of exercise

FALLS AND THE SOCIAL ISOLATION OF OLDER ADULTS IN THE NATIONAL HEALTH AND AGING TRENDS STUDY J. Pohl 1pp

The probability of falling increased with each increase in social isolation construct score. Even after adjusting for age, gender, and education, social isolation significantly predicted falling (OR=1.08; CI=1.02–1.14).

DOES DEPRESCRIBING FALL-ASSOCIATED DRUGS REDUCE FALLS AND ITS COMPLICATIONS?: A SYSTEMATIC REVIEW J. Lee2,4,6, 1pp

“fall-risk increasing drugs” (FRIDs) There is insufficient evidence that a FRID withdrawal strategy is effective for preventing falls.
201707 Calcium reduces Disruptions in Calcium homeostasis during exercise nihms853171

Calcium Supplementation Attenuates Disruptions in Calcium Homeostasis during Exercise Vanessa D Sherk1,*, 12pp

Purpose —The purpose of this study was to determine whether taking a chewable calcium (Ca) supplement 30 minutes before exercise mitigates disruptions in Ca homeostasis and bone resorption in competitive male cyclists. It is possible that ingesting Ca only 30 minutes before exercise was not a sufficient time interval to optimize gut Ca availability during exercise. (so 60-90 minutes ought to be tried imo)
201709 Aging, Osteocytes, and Mechanotransduction 11914_2017_Article_402

Aging, Osteocytes, and Mechanotransduction by Haniyeh Hemmatian1, 11pp

The bone is able to adapt its structure to mechanical signals via the bone remodeling process governed by mechanosensitive osteocytes. the load-adaptive response of osteocytes may change with aging, even when mechanical loading would remain unchanged. The osteocytes are considered to be the cells responsible for sensing mechanical signals on the bones and consequently orchestrating the activity of osteoblasts and osteoclasts bone matrix deformations resulting from mechanical loads placed on the bone cause interstitial fluid flow through the canaliculi along the osteocyte cell processes. the hydraulic pressure induced by loading could be another mechanism to activate osteocytes. It has been shown that a cyclic hydraulic pressure of 68 kPa results in the production of signaling molecules in murine MLO-Y4 osteocyte like cells, and a pressure as low as 13 kPa induces prostaglandin production by primary osteocytes in chicken calvariae
201800 Effects of Exercise and Aging on Skeletal Muscle cshperspectmed-BEX-a029785

Effects of Exercise and Aging on Skeletal Muscle Giovanna Distefano1 15pp

We posit that exercise and physical activity can influence many of the changes in muscle during aging, and thus should be emphasized as part of a lifestyle essential to healthy aging. exercise can profoundly improve muscle me tabolism, strength, and function, which can attenuate or prevent some of the negative age-associated changes and will translate to a “healthy” aging. The combination of good nutrition and an active lifestyle can minimize the declines in muscle mass, strength, and physical performance that are observed in older people, all of which likely prevent or delay mobility limitations, disability, institutionalization, and morbidity, translating into healthy aging.
201802 inflammatory markers and fractures nihms935867
Soluble inflammatory markers and risk of incident fractures in older adults: the Cardiovascular Health Study Danijela Stojanovic, 17pp
chronic inflammatory and immune processes may be related to higher rates of incident hip fractures Cardiovascular Health Study (CHS) In the hip fracture analysis cohort, doubling of IL-6 was associated with a significantly higher risk of incident hip fractures (unadjusted model HR 1.13, in men the HR was not significantly different from 1. a unit increase in WBC was associated with a significantly higher risk of incident hip fracture overall (HR 1.04, 95%CI 1.01–1.06), and, in models stratified by sex, in women (HR 1.08, 95%CI 1.03–1.14) but not men. baseline levels of IL-6 and WBC were associated with higher incidence of hip fractures among women and the overall cohort during an 11.2-year follow-up period.
201810 Effects of Resistance Exercise on Bone Health enm-33-435

Effects of Resistance Exercise on Bone Health A Ram Hong1, 10pp

a diagnosis should be considered for both sarcopenia and osteoporosis, which may be treated with optimal therapeutic interventions eliciting pleiotropic effects on both bones and muscles To stimulate the osteogenic effects for bone mass accretion, bone tissues must be exposed to mechanical load exceeding those experienced during daily living activities. resistance exercise (RE) the term ‘osteosarcopenia’ has been proposed for patients with both sarcopenia and osteoporosis a variety of muscular loads are applied on the bone during RE, which generate stimuli and promote an osteogenic response of the bone [16]. Regular walking, which is frequently prescribed to prevent osteoporosis, also has little or no effect on prevention of bone loss [23]. hip and spine areal BMD (aBMD) The RE interventions including weighted lunges, hip abduction/ adduction, knee extension/flexion, plantar-/dorsi-flexion, back extension, reverse chest fly, and abdominal exercises or a smaller number of compound movements oof squats and deadlifts, target the major muscle groups attached to the hip and spine.
The greatest skeletal benefits from RE have been achieved when the resistance was progressively increased over time, the magnitude of mechanical load was high (around 80% to 85% one RM) [34], exercise was performed at least twice a week, and large muscles crossing the hip and spine were targeted [35,36]. The spine may be more responsive to RE than the hip [37]. Osteocytes play a key role in the remodeling process by sensing the mechanical loads, and transmitting the information to the osteoblasts and osteoclasts, which then maintain the skeletal homeostasis [74]. mechanical loading can lead to increase in the cross-sectional area and tissue density of bones. positive skeletal effects on hip regions have been reported in previous studies and literature reviews [76,77]. Many animal studies showed that loading must be dynamic not static [83], induce high frequency strains [84,85], and be applied rapidly [86].
Because osteocytes are desensitized due to repetitive loading, short bouts with interval foor rest are more beneficial than the same number of loads performed all at once [88]. Furthermore, because bone adapts to customary patterns of loading such as one-directional movement, diversification of loading such as multi-directional training is required to stimulate an adaptive skeletal response [89]. Bones become less sensitive to mechanical loading after skeletal maturity is reached at 18 to 25 years of age. Consequently, the skeleton is more responsive to exercise in childhood than in adulthood and old age [91].
RE has resulted in a significant improvement of BMD in the lumbar spine and femur neck in postmenopausal women [17,92,93]. A combination of RE and weight-bearing aerobic exercise (e.g., running, skipping, jumping, or high-impact aerobics) is recommended as RE training provides muscular loading while weight-bearing aerobic exercise provides additional mechanical loading to the bone above gravity. DXA-based exercise studies could underestimate the actual effects of mechanical loading on bone [99]. Considering that most of the beneficial effects of exercise in adult bones are characterized by changes in geometry, there is a growing interest in using other bone imaging modalities such as quantitative computed tomography (QCT) to assess bone strength.
201900 High-Impact Exercise Increased Femoral Neck Bone Density With No Adverse Effects

High-Impact Exercise Increased Femoral Neck Bone Density With No Adverse Effects on Imaging Markers of Knee Osteoarthritis in Postmenopausal Women by Chris Hartley 11p (thanks to hungryim/ )

bone mineral density (BMD), bone mineral content (BMC), and section modulus (Z Forty-two women aged 55 to 70 years who were at least 12 months postmenopausal were recruited. The 6-month intervention consisted of progressive, unilateral, high-impact exercise incorporating multidirectional hops on one randomly assigned exercise leg (EL) for comparison with the contralateral control leg (CL). Femoral neck BMD, BMC, and Z all increased in the EL (+0.81%, +0.69%, and +3.18%, respectively) compared to decreases in the CL -0.57%,0.71%, and 0.75%: all interaction effects In conclusion, a high-impact exercise intervention that requires little time, cost, or specialist equipment improved femoral neck BMD with no negative effects on knee OA imaging biomarkers. Unilateral high-impact exercise is a feasible intervention to reduce hip fracture risk in healthy postmenopausal women.
201904 osteocytes and aging nihms-1521190

Senescent and apoptotic osteocytes and aging: Exercise to the rescue? Vanessa D Sherk 11pp

exercise can prevent senescence in skeletal muscle, we provide a novel hypothesis by which exercise can prolong skeletal health. Exercise is often recommended for maintaining and improving bone health, in part, because of the demonstrated increases in bone formation rate and bone strength in response to mechanical loading, although gain in bone mass is less apparent Endurance or aerobic exercise typically provides a smaller-magnitude and rate of loading, and acutely stimulates bone resorption [34] There is less oxidative damage to muscle mitochondrial membranes in response to acute exercise and improved antioxidant capacity with aging in those who chronically exercise [48–50].
201906 Aerobic exercise modulates cytokine profile and sleep quality in elderly AFHS1902-2198

Aerobic exercise modulates cytokine profile and sleep quality in elderly by Shehab M Abd El-Kader 10pp

Objective: To investigate the effects of aerobic exercise training on the sleep quality and inflammatory cytokines in elderly subjects. Results: There was a significant increase in total sleep duration, sleep efficiency and sleep onset latency in group(A) after 6 months of aerobic exercise training, while, wake time after sleep onset and rapid eye movement (REM) latency significantly reduced after 6 months of aerobic training compared with values obtained prior to aerobic exercise training. Also, the mean values of TNF- a and IL-6 decreased significantly and the mean value of IL-10 significantly increased in group (A) after the aerobic exercise training,
Lower physical activity level was found to be a significant risk factor for insomnia20. and a total sleep time of less than 6.5 hours exercise intervention conducted 3 times per week for 6 months The program began with 10 min of stretching and was conducted using the maximal heart rate index (HRmax) estimated by: 220-age. First 2 months = 60–70% of HR max, second 4 months = 70–80% of HRmax34. Conclusion Exercise training can be considered as a non-pharmacological modality for modifying sleep quality and inflammation among elderly.
201907 isometric back extensor strength testing 10.1177_0300060519885268

Reliability and validity of three isometric back extensor strength assessments with different test postures by Sen Yang, 12pp

back extensor strength (BES) standing, prone and sitting positions, tests conducted in the sitting position showed a relatively low validity ( 0.32) measurement error was lowest in the prone position. A hand-held dynamometer (HHD) is a relatively time-saving and inexpensive apparatus now commonly used in clinical practice. (b) prone BES with tripod fixation of the handheld dynamometer; Prone position BES was measured with a microFET3 isometric dynamometer (Hoggan Scientific, Salt Lake City, UT, USA) the participant was asked to raise their hands, lift their head, and push back against the tripod with maximal force (N) for 5 s (Figure 1b). All three test procedures showed higher peak back extensor strength in session 2 compared with session 1, suggesting a mild learning effect. fixation of the HHD with a tripod to assess BES, with the participant in a prone position, allows accurate evaluation of BES without discomfort, and poses minimal risk of injury to even the severely disfigured spine. maximal isometric back extensor strength assessment, with the subject in a prone posture, can be applied to individuals with different back strength levels and may be the most useful for ranking back extensor strength in clinical and epidemiological studies.
201907 protect hips from fall-related fracture PMRR-4-205

Technology innovation to protect hips from fall-related fracture Patricia A Quigley 4pp

(informercial imo) One such promising innovation recently emerged onto the commercial market is a hip protection “smart belt” (Tango Belt, Active Protective Technologies). Motion-sensing and companion mobile application technologies combine to measure efficiency and effectiveness of this innovation, articulated through a case-study. the elderly infrequently wear hip protector products - pants, undergarments, or outer wear. In studies concluding that hip protectors had no significant effect on hip fracture risk [17- 20], patient adherence was generally poor
(ah ha! post sizes must be <40,000 characters), so the balance up to date will become Part 4

PART ONE THOUSAND AND NINETEEN
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Sunday
The pulse from Barris’ back pocket was both surprising and annoying in equal measure. He brought a silencing finger to his lips, then reached back with the same hand and retrieved his phone, promising himself if it was Nuncio being an annoying git for shits and giggles, the following hunt he went on would be far worthier of his time.
Sam’s name on the screen was a shock.
He connected the call and lifted his phone to his ear. “Hey, buddy. I wasn’t expecting a call this soon.”
“Quick question,” Sam said, getting to the point, just like the rest of their branch of the family.
“Shoot.”
“Haha,” Sam deadpanned. “I see what you did there.”
Barris smiled, liking this side of Sam. Perhaps he should’ve had a phone meeting instead of a face-to-face. This morning hadn’t gone as well as he’d pictured in his head. “What do you want to know?”
He heard Sam moving around before he asked in a lowered whisper, “Why’d you send Gerry’s mom that statue if you hate her so much?”
Barris deduced several things from that. One: Sam had been talking to someone from Pensacola – most likely Helen’s husband. Two: Geraldine was in the room with Sam. And Three: Sam had not told her about their conversation this morning.
He took a second to wonder why Sam hadn’t and another to wonder why he cared. He blamed it on his fledgling relationship with Emily, who was very much a people person.
“Are you there, Uncle Barris?”
An unwelcome noise had Barris’ right hand flexing in a brief squeeze, his eyes flaring as he tilted his head to one side in warning. “Sure, Sam.”
“So?”
“So, yes, I gave her a statue. She annoyed me, making assumptions that weren’t hers to make, and apparently, I wasn’t the only one in the family she’d been making unwanted overtures to. Was there anything else?”
“Uhhh… yuh,” Sam drawled like he was a fool for thinking they were done.
Barris worked his jaw, deciding for the sake of forward movement in their budding relationship, to let Sam have that one … this time.
“Why?” Sam then seemed to think about it for a second. “What’d you do to it? Did you poison it? Could my girl be hurt if she touched it? What…”
Of course, Sam would jump to that conclusion. He was still thinking in terms of a human after all, and the mortals of this realm stopped believing in curses centuries ago. “Sam, cool your jets, kiddo. Your girl and everyone else are fine.”
“So it is poisoned?” he whispered accusingly.
“No. Not the way you’re thinking.”
“But it’s doing something to her mother, right?”
With his right arm still fully extended, Barris turned his head to the left, focusing entirely on the phone in his hand. “Sam, what I have or haven’t done is, at this moment, no reflection on you. My actions are my own, and I will stand by them ’til the end of time. That said, you really need to ask yourself how important it is that you inject yourself into my business because once you know, you can’t deny your knowledge.”
Things went quiet for a few seconds, and Barris knew he was mulling it over.
“Thanks, Uncle Barris,” Sam finally said, the finality of his tone being answer enough.
“Anytime, Sam. You know I’m just a phone call away.”
Sam hung up, which made it easy for Barris to use his thumb to turn off his phone and return it to his back left pocket.
Then he panned ever so slowly to the right; taking in the beauty of the grass and trees that ended abruptly, giving him a gorgeous view of Penn’s View in Bald Eagle State Forest. His right foot was already up on the last clump of rock before it fell away to the forest floor thousands of feet below them. When he finally faced forward, he stared coldly at the badly beaten man who clung helplessly at his wrist, his face bruised and bloodied, his jaw shattered and unusable.
“Now,” he said, his voice devoid of all emotion. “Where were we?” He took a moment to catalogue the man’s injuries, knowing Llyr would want to relive every second of the man’s demise at the reunion for having dared to taser his son. “Oh, yes.”
He drew the man towards him until they were nose to nose, though his feet continued to dangle over the drop. “Nod, if you believe in a god.”
The man jerked his head in affirmation, his terror and agony blending together seamlessly.
“Well, when you meet them—whoever they are—tell them ‘the sons of Armina of Mystal say ‘hi’.”
And with that, Barris tossed him on a ballistic arc, deep into the forest like the garbage he was, with no chance of survival and limited odds of ever being found.
* * *
After I hung up, I internalised and relived the conversation in intricate detail. Uncle Barris had definitely done something to the statue, but I believed him when he said no one else would be hurt. Helen was not my friend. Despite being my girl’s mother, she was a stain on the species in the worst possible way as far as I was concerned.
He hadn’t gone as far as to say she would die, but he was very clear on his intent, and how he would stand by the outcome, and from what I’d seen of Dad’s family, they weren’t the touchy/feely/live-and-let-live-after-a-warning kind of people. (The guy that tasered me would already be dead if I hadn’t gotten their promise to leave him alone.) And because I didn’t know for sure, technically, I wasn’t hiding anything from Gerry.
I was already willing to look the other way if I thought Fisk was screwing with Helen, so what difference did it make if it was my uncle instead of my brother? The best part of this plan was Gerry didn’t know about the statue. She didn’t because Robbie hadn’t mentioned it, and if he’d seen it, he’d have been all over it.
On top of that, Tuck said the statue had arrived in Pensacola after they’d arrived, which meant Alex had been in hospital unconscious. So, even if he were to make a miraculous return, he didn’t know anything about it either.
That meant that only Tucker, Helen, and the two bodyguards had seen it, and it couldn’t be discussed if I was the only one who knew the connection.
And right then, I realised I needed more information … dammit.
Returning to the physical realm, still facing away from Geraldine and Maddy (because my girl could lipread), I called Uncle Barris again. It took three times to go through.
“Sam, this is getting a bit much, don’t you think?” he said, his voice thick with amusement. I heard heavy traffic in the background, something missing from before.
“Bear with me, Uncle Barris,” I whispered. “I still don’t want to know the details, but I’m sorting out what’s going to happen down the track.”
“I’m listening.”
“I think your gift needs to disappear afterwards. Or, at least, it needs to lose any connection to the family.”
“That’s why I didn’t put anything on it, Sam. It’s just the marble statue by itself. Apart from the quality being Kala’s, no one will ever prove it came from us.”
Okay, that’s good. But after all this time, I felt confident that revelling in glory all by herself wasn’t Helen’s style. “That doesn’t mean she didn’t do it for you. If she’s been bragging to people that you gave it to her, she’s bound to have commemorated it somehow so that everyone coming or going knows it was a personal gift from you to her.”
I heard a whole lot of dark cursing that was possibly the most colourful I’d ever heard. “Fuck it! You’re right. She would,” he admitted with a snarl. “I’ll take care of it.”
Language aside … “Alright, well, I’ll leave that with you. I don’t plan on mentioning it ever again to anyone.”
“Sounds like a plan. Talk to you later, Sam.”
“Later, Uncle Barris.”
[Next Chapter]
* * *
((All comments welcome. Good or bad, I’d love to hear your thoughts 🥰🤗))
I made a family tree/diagram of the Mystallian family that can be found here
For more of my work, including WPs: Angel466 or an index of previous WPS here.
FULL INDEX OF BOB THE HOBO TO DATE CAN BE FOUND HERE!!

PART ONE THOUSAND AND EIGHTEEN
[Previous Chapter] [Next Chapter] [The Beginning] [Patreon+2]
Sunday
Tucker’s phone rang, but since Julian had permanently attached himself to Tucker’s hip (despite repeated attempts on his part to make Julian go home to his wife and kids—even going as far as to call Kimberley directly to tell her he didn’t need Julian hovering, only to be told her husband had her blessing to be with him during this difficult time), the asshat he considered his best friend reached it first.
“Tucker Portsmith’s phone,” Julian said after checking the number. “How’d it go?”
He glanced at Tucker, then nodded and put it on speaker, placing it on the kitchen table between them.
“I’m here,” Tucker said, leaning forward over the phone, wanting … no … needing to know what Helen had done. It was just after midday, which was the deadline for their offer.
“She submitted the signed paperwork,” James said, seeming to choose his words carefully.
“Then what’s the problem?” Tucker demanded. Having done more than his share of corporate negotiations, he knew an approaching hiccup when he heard it.
“Technically, nothing, and perhaps I’m reading something that isn’t there…”
“When it comes to Helen, assume the worst and multiply it exponentially,” Julian said.
“Exactly, which is why her compliance without any counterdemands is problematic for me. It’s as if she’s thrown in the towel.”
Tucker and Julian both shook their heads. “That woman’s tenacity is borderline sociopathic,” Julian said while Tucker mulled the situation over. “Quitting isn’t in her vocabulary. She’d only back off if she had a better offer on the horizon.”
Just like that, the memory of Helen shamelessly throwing herself at Yitzak Nascerdios flashed in front of his eyes, and he groaned, bowing his head to the table.
“Tuck?”
Tucker rolled his head just enough to see his friend. “We had dinner last week with Yitzak Nascerdios.”
“The wine connoisseur?” Julian and James asked together.
“I have to warn him.”
“No! No, you don’t!” James insisted, growing louder with every word. “You absolutely do NOT have to do anything of the sort. If she’s happy to move on, let. Her. Go. That couldn’t work out better for us! I’m serious, Mister Portsmith. You don’t know anything for sure anyway, so it’s pre-emptive and arguably presumptuous of you to assume something of this nature.”
Tucker closed his eyes and felt his friend’s hand between his shoulders. “From a legal point of view, I agree with James. Letting her chase after the Nascerdios is in your best interest. By the time they figure out she’s a gold-digging…er…nasty piece of work,” he amended when Tucker opened one eye to glare at him. “She’ll be far from you and no longer your problem. If you warn them and they chase her off, she’ll become twice the problem she is now.”
“But this is the family Geraldine’s … distantly marrying into. Poten—Stop looking at me like that, Julian. I didn’t mean it like it was a done deal, and I was forcing her into it. The future is theirs to decide. My point is the Nascerdios wouldn’t even be on Helen’s radar if it wasn’t for Geraldine’s relationship with Sam.”
“It doesn’t matter,” James maintained over the phone. “If she’s got her sights set on something more and is willing to cut you loose to chase it, it’s the best possible outcome we could ask for. Let her do it.”
Tucker only then realised his friend hadn’t stopped rubbing circles between his shoulder blades. “Is there anything else we can do right now?” Julian asked on Tucker’s behalf.
“No. I’ve just left Judge Allcott’s now. The signatures are on the paperwork, and his wife processed them for us as I waited.”
Tucker’s head came up. “His wife?”
James chuckled. “His wife was his secretary for eighteen years before they were married. He deliberately neglected to remove her authorisation from the judicial system.”
“I thought that sort of thing was a trope…” Julian said in surprise.
“People have to meet somewhere, Mister Santos. Logistically, meeting our future partners through work connections makes up over sixty percent of relationships.”
“That’s true,” Julian said, and from the smile in his voice, he was remembering how he and Kimberley had met back when her father had hired James to represent him in a fraud case. “But I’m more concerned if someone works out she’s not technically authorised to file his paperwork.”
“She is authorised. If it’s ever brought to light, it will be rescinded then, but until then, filing paperwork for her husband under his authority is still legally binding.”
“So, as far as we’re concerned, it’s a done deal?” Tucker asked, wanting it spelled out in its simplest form.
“It is. As soon as the stock market opens tomorrow morning, half of your shares in Portsmith Electronics will be transferred to Mrs Portsmith to do with as she wishes.”
Tucker pulled himself back to look at the phone still sitting on the table before him. “Do you need us for anything else?” he asked, for the next steps were from a business perspective, and he was done taking a back seat in his own situation.
“I’ll be monitoring Mrs Portsmith’s actions, but we’re in a holding pattern for now.”
“Thank you, Mister Cowell. You are worth every cent of your fee.”
“If I’m being honest, I would’ve preferred a harder fight, Mister Portsmith. With Geraldine still technically your dependant until the end of the financial year and everything we could have thrown at this, not only would she get nothing, but she’d be doing prison time…”
“We were never bringing Geraldine into this mess. She’s been through enough.”
“I understand, sir. I have a teenage daughter of my own. I’ll let you know when things are finally sorted.”
Tucker’s divorce lawyer hung up without another word, and Julian turned to Tucker. “I didn’t finish what I was going to say before,” he said, folding his arms and resting his hip on the table. “As your lawyer, I agree with Mister Cowell. However, as your friend, I’m torn between doing what’s right for you and doing what’s right for your conscience.”
Tucker shook his head. “This isn’t about me. If it were, I’d leave it. I don’t care what happens to me…”
“I DO!”
“STOP!” Tucker shouted just as loudly. When Julian took a breath, so did he. “What I meant is, I’m not doing this for me. There’s enough friction between our family and the Nascerdios as it is. For Geraldine’s sake, I can’t add any more to it.”
Julian stared at him for a few seconds, then released a breath and reached for the phone, gently pushing it to within Tucker’s reach. “Call them.”
* * *
I didn’t know how it was possible to lose at a board game seven times in a row when random chance was all there was to it, but somehow, I’d managed to achieve that unwanted milestone.
Maddy was thrilled to win five games; squealing and crowing and running around the room waving her hands above her head in victory.
As she was doing yet another lap of our room, I leaned towards Gerry. “I see Levi’s taught her the value of being a good sport.”
“Shhh,” Gerry chided, giving my side a nudge. “She’s a little girl having fun. Stop being a bully.”
Gerry’s phone rang from the side table, causing her to flop back, twist and stretch out with one hand to reach it without getting up. My smile was huge, loving how relaxed my girl was in my space. “Hey, Daddy,” she said, and my smile dwindled. She pushed my shin with her foot. “Stop it,” she mouthed over the top of the phone. She then stiffened, her full attention on my face, and I followed suit. “Yes, Daddy. He’s here.”
Gerry passed her phone over to me.
“Hello?”
“Sam, do you have a minute to talk?”
He must have heard Maddy in the background. Half the building probably heard her crowing. “Give me a second,” I said, then twisted the phone to my throat. “Are you okay having another game without me while your Dad and I talk?” At her hurt look, I added, “I’d put it on speaker, but I don’t know if Maddy should hear it. I’ll tell you all about it later, I promise.”
I watched as Gerry shifted gears and turned to Maddy. “Hey, sweetie. Do you want to play again while Sam talks boring grown-up stuff on the phone?”
Maddy suddenly scrambled across the bed, taking up her coveted gingerbread girl and moving it back to the starting position. Gerry followed suit with the ice cream girl. I had been relegated to the marshmallow square as it was the least feminine piece.
I went over to Gerry’s reading nook and sat in her chair. “Okay, sir. What’s up?”
“Gerry’s mother has signed the divorce settlement in its entirety.”
“Isn’t that a good thing?”
The sigh on his side said ‘no’. “I might be completely wrong about this,” he began, which was never a good start. It was just as evident that whatever he wanted to say involved us. I merely needed to wait him out.
Since patience wasn’t my forte, I fished out my bottle of pills and pushed one between my unwilling lips. Fortunately, they were so small and dissolved immediately on the tongue that they didn’t allow me to second-guess myself and spit it out. Gerry caught the motion, and I saw her frown in concern before refocusing on Maddy and the game.
“It’s as if she’s given up, but that’s not in her nature,” Tucker finally said. “The only way she would let me win was if she had someone else with deeper pockets and wider fame on the hook, and I’m worried it might be someone in your family.”
I jerked away from the phone and stared at it for a second like it was an alien speaking gibberish before returning to the call. “Come again?” Surely, I’d heard wrong.
“I think Helen has her sights set on marrying into your family, Sam, and whoever she’s circling needs to be made aware of her intentions.”
I closed my eyes, bowed my head, and pressed the phone into my forehead. You have got to be kidding me! Realising I wasn’t calming down, I internalised, searching through every member of my family that I had met (assuming Helen hadn’t met one outside my circle), trying to figure out who’d be that dumb! No one stood out, but it was still embarrassing how long it took me to leave my imagination and return to the physical realm.
“Any idea who?” I finally asked.
“My initial thoughts are perhaps Barris or Yitzak. She’s had extended contact with Barris through the gym…”
“It’s not Uncle Barris. He hates her.” Of that, I was absolutely sure. I’d made the mistake of mentioning my girl this morning, and he told me to be very sure of her motives and that apples didn’t fall far from the tree, which was another reason for the tension between us. He was lucky I didn’t punch him.
“Are you sure about that, Sam? He did have a life-sized marble statue of her built and delivered to us in Pensacola.”
I was back to thinking the gibberish-speaking alien had returned. “My Uncle Barris did what?” I couldn’t keep the incredulity from my voice, grimacing when Gerry’s head snapped up to look at me. I waved her off and turned towards the nook.
“A life-size statue of her, in marble. It would have cost a fortune to have her likeness carved so perfectly and shipped across the country to us. I must admit, I was pretty annoyed when I first saw it. I mean, she’s a married woman…”
I could see why he’d think Uncle Barris was making an unwanted move, but it didn’t make sense from my perspective. “Maybe he was trying to get her away from you. Not for himself, but for you.”
“Why would he do that?”
“I don’t know, but I’m deadly serious about how much he doesn’t like her. Before he found out about me, he thought Gerry was going out with my older brother in China and called him straight away to warn him off. I’ll reach out to Yitzak, and then I might try our communications whiz to see if there’s been any phone chatter amongst the family.”
“Your cousin monitors everyone’s phone calls?”
There was no way to answer that without making Nuncio look bad, and after everything he’d done for me (except that one time he went way too far setting up my office), I wasn’t about to burn him. “Moving on,” I said instead.
“If you ever find out why Barris gave Helen that statue, I’d love to know.”
“I’ll ask him next time I’m talking to him,” I said, without committing to his sideways request.
“Alright. As I said, I don’t know any of this for sure, but it would be unforgivable to suspect her intentions and say nothing to you.”
“And I appreciate the heads up.”
“Tell Geraldine I love her, and I’ll talk to you both soon.”
The man had climbed several rungs in my opinion of him. “Later, sir,” I said and hung up.
Geraldine glanced at me as I twisted side-on to place her phone on the ledge deliberately moulded without sharp corners for that purpose. I raised my flared fingers to let her know I wasn’t finished, then pulled out my own phone.
Despite saying Yitzak would be my first call, I dialled my uncle instead because, dammit, I wanted to know about that statue too.
Talk about mixed messages.
[Next Chapter]
* * *
((All comments welcome. Good or bad, I’d love to hear your thoughts 🥰🤗))
I made a family tree/diagram of the Mystallian family that can be found here
For more of my work, including WPs: Angel466 or an index of previous WPS here.
FULL INDEX OF BOB THE HOBO TO DATE CAN BE FOUND HERE!

To clear up a common misconception that this is something that only happens extremely rarely, here's a list of every time more than 4 words have fit one of the categories and what number puzzle it occurred in. The first 4 words are the answers and every word after that in parenthesis are words that fit that category but were part of another group. Also, category names might not be exactly the same as the ones used.
Edit because some of the comments think I'm actually angry about Connections doing this: Some people think that I compiled this list because I'm anti-overlap when it's actually the opposite case. I actually like the overlap since I think it makes for a more interesting puzzle. I feel like every so often there's an angry comment about more than 4 words fitting a category and acting like this has never happened before so partially out of pettiness and a love of useless stats I decided to make this list to serve as proof that this has been a deliberate part of Connections since the start.

#4 Cleaning Verbs

Possible answers: DUST, MOP, SWEEP, VACUUM, (IRON)

#5 Condiments

Possible answers: KETCHUP, MAYO, RELISH, TARTAR, (MUSTARD)

#5 Clue Characters

Possible answers: GREEN, MUSTARD, PLUM, SCARLET, (PEACOCK)

#6 Shades of Blue

Possible answers: BABY, MIDNIGHT, POWDER, ROYAL, (SEA)

#6 Rappers

Possible answers: COMMON, FUTURE, ICE CUBE, Q-TIP, (CHANCE)

#9 Shirts

Possible answers: CAMI, HALTER, TANK, TEE, (POLO)

#9 Vegetables

Possible answers: BEET, CARROT, CORN, ONION, (SQUASH)

#9 Insects

Possible answers: ANT, BEETLE, MANTIS, TERMITE, (CRICKET)

#10 Countries

Possible answers: CHAD, GEORGIA, JORDAN, TOGO, (TURKEY)

#10 Birds

Possible answers: CRANE, JAY, TURKEY, SWALLOW, (KIWI)

#11 Spices

Possible answers: CARDAMOM, CLOVE, CORIANDER, CUMIN, (GINGER)

#11 Terms of Endearment

Possible answers: BOO, HONEY, SUGAR, SWEETIE, (BABY)

#12 Animal Group Names

Possible answers: FLOCK, PACK, POD, SCHOOL, (PRIDE)

#12 Deadly Sins

Possible answers: ENVY, GREED, LUST, PRIDE, (SLOTH)

#13 Airlines

Possible answers: FRONTIER, SPIRIT, UNITED, VIRGIN, (DELTA)

#13 Greek Letters

Possible answers: BETA, CHI, DELTA, IOTA, (NU)

#13 Silent G's

Possible answers: GNAT, GNAW, GNOCCHI, GNOME, (GNU)

#14 Famous Brothers

Possible answers: JONAS, MARX, WARNER, WRIGHT, (MARIO)

#14 Honda Vehicles

Possible answers: ACCORD, CIVIC, PASSPORT, PILOT, (CANOPY)

#15 Colors

Possible answers: BROWN, PINK, TURQUOISE, VIOLET, (SILVER)

#15 Fishing Equipment

Possible answers: LURE, REEL, ROD, TACKLE, (HOOK)

#16 Nuts

Possible answers: ALMOND, CASHEW, PECAN, WALNUT (PEANUT)

#17 Neck Accessories

Possible answers: ASCOT, BOLO, TIE, SCARF, (BOW)

#19 Disagreement

Possible answers: QUARREL, ROW, SPAT, TIFF, QUARREL, (BEEF)

#20 Grains

Possible answers: BARLEY, OAT, RYE, SPELT, (RICE)

#20 Royal Titles

Possible answers: BARON, EARL, KING, PRINCE, (DUKE)

#23 60's Band Member

Possible answers: BEACH BOY, BEATLE, BYRD, MONKEE, (ROLLING STONE)

#23 Dance Fads

Possible answers: DOUGIE, MACARENA, MASHED POTATO, TWIST, (VOGUE)

#25 Desserts

Possible answers: CHEESECAKE, FLAN, MOUSSE, TIRAMISU, (FUDGE)

#25 Animals with Tusks

Possible answers: ELEPHANT, HIPPO, NARWHAL, WARTHOG, (WALRUS)

#26 Countries (Holland is technically a region but it's often used as an informal name for the Netherlands)

Possible answers: DENMARK, GREECE, POLAND, PORTUGAL, (HOLLAND)

#26 Spelled with Roman Numerals

Possible answers: DILL, LIVID, MILD, MIX, (MIMIC)

#27 Body Parts

Possible answers: HEART, LIVER, LUNG, KIDNEY, (SPINE)

#28 File Extensions

Possible answers: GIF, PDF, TIFF, ZIP, (DOC)

#28 Fruits

Possible answers: BANANA, COCONUT, MANGO, PINEAPPLE, (KIWI)

#30 Joints

Possible answers: HIP, KNEE, SHOULDER, WRIST, (ELBOW)

#33 Boats

Possible answers: FERRY, JUNK, TUG, YACHT, (SUB)

#33 Cuts of Beef

Possible answers: FLANK, LOIN, ROUND, SHANK, (CHUCK)

#34 Smell

Possible answers: AROMA, BOUQUET, FRAGRANCE, SCENT, (FUNK)

#34 Music Genres

Possible answers: BLUES, COUNTRY, FUNK, SOUL, (ROCK)

#35 Metals

Possible answers: IRON, LEAD, TIN, ZINC, (NICKEL)

#36 Animals

Possible answers: KANGAROO, KOALA, WALLABY, WOMBAT, (MOLE RAT)

#38 Trees

Possible answers: ASH, CEDAR, MAPLE, PINE, (ELM)

#38 Land Formation

Possible answers: HILL, MOUNTAIN, PLATEAU, VALLEY, (PLAIN)

#38 Bagel Flavors

Possible answers: EVERYTHING, ONION, PLAIN, POPPY, (SESAME)

#41 Islands

Possible answers: CUBA, JAPAN, MALTA, PALAU, (FIJI), (JAVA)

#42 Punctuation Marks

Possible answers: COLON, COMMA, HYPHEN, PERIOD, (DASH)

#43 Birds

Possible answers: BOOBY, GULL, PELICAN, PUFFIN, (CANARY)

#45 Modes of Transportation

Possible answers: BOAT, CAR, PLANE, TRAIN, (SUBWAY)

#46 Cities

Possible answers: CHICAGO, MUNICH, PHILADELPHIA, RIO, (MANHATTAN)

#46 Fashion Magazines

Possible answers: ALLURE, ELLE, GLAMOUR, W, (COSMOPOLITAN)

#46 Storms

Possible answers: BLIZZARD, CYCLONE, SQUALL, TORNADO, (HURRICANE)

#48 Apparitions

Possible answers: GHOST, PHANTOM, SPECTER, SPIRIT, (GENIE)

#49 Relatives

Possible answers: AUNT, COUSIN, MOTHER, NEPHEW, (GRANDFATHER)

#49 Offbeat

Possible answers: DAFFY, KOOKY, QUIRKY, WACKY, (CUCKOO)

#49 Fictional Ducks

Possible answers: DAISY, DEWEY, DONALD, SCROOGE, (DAFFY)

#50 Imperial Measurements

Possible answers: FOOT, INCH, MILE, YARD, (QUART)

#52 Rodents

Possible answers: GERBIL, HAMSTER, RAT, VOLE, (MOUSE)

#52 Musical Instruments

Possible answers: HARP, HORN, ORGAN, TRIANGLE, (KEYBOARD)

#52 Complain

Possible answers: CARP, GRIPE, GROUSE, MOAN, (HARP)

#53 Animal Group Names

Possible answers: COLONY, HERD, PRIDE, SWARM, (FAMILY)

#53 AP Classes

Possible answers: BIO, CHEM, GOV, STATS, (LIT)

#54 Places for Worship

Possible answers: ALTAR, RELIQUARY, SHRINE, TEMPLE, (ABBEY)

#54 Presidents

Possible answers: CALVIN, CHESTER, GROVER, HARRY, (GARFIELD)

#56 Dances

Possible answers: HUSTLE, SALSA, SWING, TANGO, (TAP)

#57 Patterns

Possible answers: HOUNDSTOOTH, PAISLEY, PLAID, STRIPES, (DOT)

#58 Arachnids

Possible answers: MITE, SCORPION, SPIDER, TICK, (BLACK WIDOW)

#58 Fish

Possible answers: CHAR, EEL, PERCH, SHARK, (CATFISH)

#58 Superheroes

Possible answers: BLACK WIDOW, BLADE, FLASH, STORM, (TICK)

#59 Quantity

Possible answers: FEW, HANDFUL, SEVERAL, SOME, (PAIR)

#59 Celestial Objects

Possible answers: ASTEROID, COMET, MOON, PLANET, (SUN)

#60 Sports Venues

Possible answers: COURT, DIAMOND, FIELD, RINK, (RING)

#60 Jewelry

Possible answers: ANKLET, BANGLE, BROOCH, PENDANT, (RING), (CHARM)

#62 State Abbreviations

Possible answers: CO, MA, ME, PA, (LA)

#62 Period Table Symbols

Possible answers: FE, HE, NA, NI, (CO), (PA), (LA), (TI)

#63 Slang for Zero

Possible answers: JACK, NADA, NOTHING, SQUAT, (ZIP)

#63 Exercises

Possible answers: CURL, LUNGE, PLANK, PRESS, (SQUAT), (CRUNCH)

#63 Captains

Possible answers: CRUNCH, KANGAROO, OBVIOUS, PLANET, (JACK)

#64 Dog Names

Possible answers: FIDO, LUCKY, ROVER, SPOT, (REX)

#64 Perceive

Possible answers: CATCH, NOTICE, OBSERVE, SEE, (SPOT)

#64 Fishing Terms

Possible answers: BAIT, CHUM, FLY, SINKER, (CATCH)

#65 Energy

Possible answers: JUICE, SPIRIT, STEAM, VIGOR, (GAS), (FIRE)

#66 Time Periods

Possible answers: CENTURY, DECADE, MILLENNIUM, YEAR, (MONTH)

#66 Breakfast Foods

Possible answers: CEREAL, OMELET, PANCAKE, WAFFLE, (BACON), (EGG)

#67 Desserts

Possible answers: CAKE, COBBLER, PIE, TART, (FUDGE)

#67 Occupations

Possible answers: FISHER, MASON, MILLER, SMITH, (DOCTOR)

#68 Extremely

Possible answers: AWFUL, QUITE, SUPER, VERY, (REAL)

#68 Currencies

Possible answers: RAND, REAL, STERLING, WON, (POUND)

#68 _____Cake

Possible answers: CARROT, COFFEE, POUND, SPONGE, (CUP)

#69 Shoes

Possible answers: CLOG, PUMP, SLIDE, WEDGE, (MARY JANE)

#69 Slang for Marijuana

Possible answers: GRASS, HERB, MARY JANE, WEED, (BUD), (POT)

#70 Camping Supplies

Possible answers: COOLER, LANTERN, SLEEPING BAG, TENT, (CAMPER)

#70 Insult

Possible answers: BARB, DIG, DISS, JAB, (SLIGHT)

#71 States

Possible answers: ARIZONA, COLORADO, NEVADA, UTAH, (KANSAS), (MONTANA)

#72 Santa's Reindeer

Possible answers: COMET, CUPID, DASHER, VIXEN, (DANCER)

#72 Seen on Valentine's Day

Possible answers: CARD, HEART, CHOCOLATE, ROSE, (CUPID)

#73 Facial Hair

Possible answers: BEARD, GOATEE, MUSTACHE, STUBBLE, (HANDLEBAR)

#73 Pursue

Possible answers: DOG, FOLLOW, TAIL, TRACK, (SHADOW)

#74 Failures

Possible answers: BUSTS, FLOPS, MISSES, TURKEYS, (DUDS)

#75 Social Gathering

Possible answers: BASH, BLOWOUT, PARTY, SHINDIG, (MIXER)

#75 Found in a Kitchen

Possible answers: COUNTER, MIXER, RANGE, SINK, (ISLAND)

#79 Depart Quickly

Possible answers: BOOK, BOUNCE, RUN, SPLIT, (JET)

#79 Shades of Black

Possible answers: EBONY, JET, ONYX, RAVEN, (BLACK)

#80 Influence

Possible answers: CLOUT, PULL, WEIGHT, SWAY, (IMPACT)

#81 Appetizer Unit

Possible answers: FRY, NACHO, POPPER, WING, (CHIP), (CRACKER)

#81 Response to a Correct Answer

Possible answers: BINGO, CORRECT, RIGHT, YES, (DING)

#82 Drink Vessels

Possible answers: GOBLET, SNIFTER, TUMBLER, STEIN, (FLUTE)

#82 Woodwinds

Possible answers: CLARINET, FLUTE, OBOE, SAXOPHONE, (BASSOON)

#82 American Poets

Possible answers: BISHOP, FROST, OLDS, POUND, (STEIN)

#83 Unclothed

Possible answers: BARE, NAKED, NUDE, UNCLAD, (BUFF)

#83 Football Actions

Possible answers: FUMBLE, PUNT, SACK, SNAP, (TURNOVER)

#83 Finger Actions

Possible answers: BUFF, CLIP, FILE, POLISH, (SNAP)

#84 Female Animals

Possible answers: COW, DOE, HEN, MARE, (EWE)

#84 Pronouns

Possible answers: I, IT, THEY, WE, (YOU)

#84 Roman Numerals

Possible answers: D, L, M, V, (I)

#86 Information Displays

Possible answers: CHART, DIAGRAM, GRAPH, MAP, (PIE)

#86 Additional Benefit

Possible answers: BONUS, EXTRA, ICING, PERK, (GRAVY)

#86 Creatures in Folklore

Possible answers: GNOME, GOBLIN, OGRE, TROLL, (DRAGON)

#89 Alcohol

Possible answers: CIDER, PORT, SAKE, STOUT, (SPIRIT), (SCOTCH)

#89 Pixar Movies

Possible answers: BRAVE, CARS, COCO, UP, (SOUL)

#90 Baseball Calls

Possible answers: BALL, OUT, SAFE, STRIKE, (WALK)

#90 Fish

Possible answers: CARP, CATFISH, FLOUNDER, SMELT, (SALMON)

#91 Jungle Animals

Possible answers: ANACONDA, CAPYBARA, JAGUAR, TOUCAN, (LION)

#91 Lowest Point

Possible answers: BASE, BOTTOM, FOOT, FOUNDATION, (LEGS)

#92 Halloween Decorations

Possible answers: BAT, COBWEB, PUMPKIN, TOMBSTONE, (BONES)

#93 Animal Sounds

Possible answers: BUZZ, CLUCK, MEOW, OINK, (BARK)

#93 Inside Info

Possible answers: DIRT, DISH, SCOOP, SKINNY, (TEA)

#95 Songs that are Names

Possible answers: ALEJANDRO, LOLA, MICHELLE, STAN, (IRIS)

#96 Animals

Possible answers: BUFFALO, COW, GOAT, SHEEP, (HORSE)

#96 Gymnastics Apparatus

Possible answers: FLOOR, HORSE, RINGS, VAULT, (BEAM)

#97 Fairy Tale Figures

Possible answers: GIANT, PRINCESS, WITCH, WOLF, (QUEEN)

#97 "Peanuts" Characters

Possible answers: CHARLIE, PEPPERMINT PATTY, PIGPEN, WOODSTOCK, (LUCY)

#98 Fruits

Possible answers: APRICOT, FIG, GRAPE, LIME, (BERRY)

#98 Luxurious

Possible answers: DELUXE, GRAND, LAVISH, OPULENT, (SWANK)

#99 Intelligent

Possible answers: BRIGHT, CLEVER, QUICK, SHARP, (SMART)

#100 Web Browser-Related

Possible answers: BOOKMARK, HISTORY, TAB, WINDOW, (LINK), (POCKET)

#100 Dirty_____

Possible answers: DOZEN, JOKE, LAUNDRY, MARTINI, (WINDOW)

#101 Bowling Terms

Possible answers: ALLEY, BALL, LANE, PIN, (SPARE)

#101 Common Merch Items

Possible answers: MUG, PEN, TEE, TOTE, (PIN)

#102 Vehicles

Possible answers: BUS, CAR, MOTORCYCLE, TRUCK, (SCOOTER)

#102 Muppets

Possible answers: ANIMAL, BEAKER, GONZO, SCOOTER, (CHEF), (PIGGY)

#103 Soda Fountain Orders (Concrete can mean a type of milkshake or frozen custard)

Possible answers: FLOAT, MALT, SHAKE, SUNDAE, (CONCRETE), (SPLIT)

#104 Robust

Possible answers: FIT, HEALTHY, SOUND, STRONG, (WELL)

#104 Water Sources

Possible answers: FOUNTAIN, SPRING, TAP, WELL, (SINK)

#105 Kitchen Utensils

Possible answers: GRATER, LADLE, PEELER, WHISK, (CLEAVER)

#106 Wedding Items

Possible answers: BOUQUET, RING, TRAIN, VEIL, (CAKE)

#106 Encase

Possible answers: CAKE, COAT, COVER, CRUST, (VEIL)

#107 Snakes

Possible answers: BOA, MAMBA, PYTHON, VIPER, (GARTER)

#108 Produced by Trees

Possible answers: ACORN, CONE, POLLEN, SAP, (GUM), (NEEDLE)

#108 Candy

Possible answers: CHOCOLATE, GUM, LICORICE, LOLLIPOP, (SUCKER)

#108 Target of a Scheme

Possible answers: CHUMP, FOOL, MARK, SUCKER, (SAP)

#109 Rap Subgenres

Possible answers: BOUNCE, CRUNK, DRILL, GRIME, (TRAP)

#110 Golf Clubs

Possible answers: IRON, PUTTER, WEDGE, WOOD, (CLUB)

#112 Coffee Counter Items

Possible answers: CUP, LID, STIRRER, STRAW, (STICK)

#114 Talk

Possible answers: BLATHER, CHAT, GAB, JABBER, (YAK)

#115 Christmas-Related

Possible answers: MISTLETOE, REINDEER, SNOWMAN, STOCKING, (PRESENT), (CANDY CANE)

#116 MLB Teams

Possible answers: ANGEL, CUB, MET, RED, (NAT)

#119 Celebratory Occasion

Possible answers: ANNIVERSARY, BIRTHDAY, SHOWER, WEDDING, (RECEPTION), (SERVICE)

#120 Crops

Possible answers: CORN, CUCUMBER, PEPPER, TOMATO, (MELON)

#121 Bible Books

Possible answers: ACTS, JOB, KINGS, MARK, (GENESIS)

#121 NHL Teams

Possible answers: FLAMES, KRAKEN, STARS, WILD, (KINGS), (RANGER)

#123 Conceal

Possible answers: BLOCK, COVER, HIDE, MASK, (SHIELD)

#124 "L" Cities

Possible answers: LAGOS, LIMERICK, LINCOLN, LUXOR, (LIMA)

#124 Poetry Terms

Possible answers: LINE, METER, RHYME, VERSE, (LIMERICK)

#125 Butt

Possible answers: BOTTOM, BUNS, SEAT, TAIL, (BOOTY)

#126 Tools

Possible answers: HAMMER, FILE, LEVEL, SAW, (WRENCH)

#126 Keyboard Shortcuts

Possible answers: COPY, FIND, PRINT, SAVE, (FILE)

#127 Days of the Week

Possible answers: FRIDAY, SATURDAY, SUNDAY, THURSDAY, (WEDNESDAY), (TUESDAY)

#127 Go Bad

Possible answers: ROT, SOUR, SPOIL, TURN, (FESTER)

#129 Bit of Air

Possible answers: BREEZE, DRAFT, GUST, PUFF, (PANT)

#130 Falsify

Possible answers: FABRICATE, FAKE, FIX, FORGE, (FUDGE)

#130 TV Shows

Possible answers: FARGO, FIREFLY, FLEABAG, FLIPPER, (FRIENDS)

#131 Animal Homes

Possible answers: DEN, LAIR, HIVE, NEST, (WEB), (WARREN)

#131 Equitable

Possible answers: EQUAL, EVEN, FAIR, JUST, (GOOD)

#132 Tableware

Possible answers: BOWL, DISH, PLATE, SAUCER, (CROCK), (CUP)

#133 British Food

Possible answers: MASH, ROAST, SCONE, TRIFLE, (BANGER)

#133 Predicament

Possible answers: BIND, PICKLE, SCRAPE, SPOT, (JAM)

#134 Impel

Possible answers: DRIVE, INSPIRE, MOTIVATE, SPUR, (SPARK)

#135 Compound Words

Possible answers: BACKPACK, BIGWIG, DOWNTOWN, RAGTAG, (TEXTBOOK)

#136 Grammar Tenses

Possible answers: FUTURE, PAST, PERFECT, PRESENT, (SIMPLE)

#136 The 12 Days of Christmas

Possible answers: DRUMMER, LADY, RING, SWAN, (LORD)

#137 Excellent

Possible answers: ACES, KEEN, NEATO, NIFTY, (SWELL)

#137 Bubbles

Possible answers: FOAM, FROTH, HEAD, LATHER, (BUBBLE)

#138 Metals

Possible answers: COPPER, GOLD, NICKEL, SILVER, (BRASS), (MERCURY)

#139 Aesthetics

Possible answers: DRESS, LOOK, MANNER, STYLE, (TASTE)

#140 Mishmash

Possible answers: HASH, JUMBLE, MEDLEY, STEW, (LITTER)

#143 Filler Words

Possible answers: ERM, UH, UM, WELL, (LIKE), (ER)

#146 Clue Weapons

Possible answers: CANDLESTICK, KNIFE, ROPE, WRENCH, (PIPE)

#147 Unchanging

Possible answers: EVEN, LEVEL, STABLE, STEADY, (UNIFORM)

#147 Long, Sharp Objects

Possible answers: LANCE, PIN, SKEWER, SPIT, (PITCHFORK)

#148 Musical Format

Possible answers: LP, PLATTER, VINYL, WAX, (CD)

#148 Cube-Shaped

Possible answers: BOUILLON, DIE, ICE, SUGAR, (STOCK)

#150 Equivocate

Possible answers: HEDGE, SEE-SAW, WAVER, YO-YO, (FLIP-FLOP), (WAFFLE)

#151 Podcasts

Possible answers: RADIOLAB, SERIAL, UP FIRST, WTF, (FRESH AIR), (REPLY ALL)

#152 Intelligent

Possible answers: BRIGHT, QUICK, SHARP, SMART, (SAGE)

#152 Medieval Weapons

Possible answers: CLUB, MACE, SPEAR, SWORD, (AXE)

#153 Filmmaking Equipment

Possible answers: BOOM, DOLLY, LENS, TRIPOD, (GRIP)

#154 Sports Professionals

Possible answers: COACH, GM, PLAYER, SCOUT, (SUB)

#154 Car Companies

Possible answers: BMW, HONDA, JAGUAR, SUBARU, (FORD), (GM)

#156 Vocal Fanfare

Possible answers: BEHOLD, PRESTO, TADA, VOILA, (SURPRISE)

#157 Magazines

Possible answers: O, OK, US, W, (EW), (SI)

#157 Yes

Possible answers: HAI, JA, SI, DA, (OK), (OUI)

#158 Animals

Possible answers: BUFFALO, DEER, FISH, MOOSE, (BULL), (STEER), (SEAL)

#160 Quick Observation

Possible answers: GANDER, GLANCE, GLIMPSE, LOOK, (PEEK)

#160 Parts of a Mountain

Possible answers: CLIFF, CRAG, LEDGE, RIDGE, (BLUFF), (PEAK)

#161 _____Day

Possible answers: EARTH, GROUNDHOG, LABOR, MAY, (BIRTH)

#162 Primates

Possible answers: BABOON, BONOBO, GIBBON, GORILLA, (APE)

#162 Fashionable

Possible answers: CHIC, HIP, HOT, IN, (VOGUE)

#164 Area Between Mountains

Possible answers: CANYON, GULCH, PASS, RAVINE, (GORGE)

#165 Food

Possible answers: PASTY, PIE, TART, TURNOVER, (PARFAIT), (RAGOUT), (CURRY)

#165 Countries

Possible answers: JAPAN, POLAND, TUNISIA, TURKEY, (JORDAN)

#166 Reality Shows

Possible answers: ALONE, CATFISH, CHOPPED, SURVIVOR, (BACHELOR)

#168 Municipalities

Possible answers: CITY, TOWN, COUNTY, VILLAGE, (CAPITAL)

#171 Parts of the Foot

Possible answers: ARCH, BALL, SOLE, TOE, (HEEL)

#171 Dog Commands

Possible answers: COME, DOWN, SIT, STAY, (HEEL)

#173 Ways to Remove Hair

Possible answers: SHAVE, THREAD, TWEEZE, WAX, (CUT)

#174 Hold Back

Possible answers: CAP, CHECK, CURB, LIMIT, (HAMPER)

#175 Excite, with "Up"

Possible answers: AMP, FIRE, HYPE, PUMP, (GAS)

#177 TV Shows

Possible answers: CHEERS, EUPHORIA, FELICITY, GLEE, (FRASIER)

#178 Found on Sheet Music

Possible answers: CLEF, NOTE, REST, STAFF, (SCALES)

#178 Zodiac Symbols

Possible answers: BULL, CRAB, SCALES, TWINS, (VIRGIN)

#180 Absolute

Possible answers: PURE, SHEER, TOTAL, UTTER, (STARK)

#180 Express

Possible answers: AIR, SPEAK, STATE, VOICE, (UTTER)

#181 Cooking Oils

Possible answers: CORN, OLIVE, PALM, PEANUT, (RICE)

#183 Luxurious Fabrics

Possible answers: CHIFFON, SILK, SATIN, VELVET, (LACE)

#185 -ough

Possible answers: BOUGH, COUGH, DOUGH, TOUGH, (ROUGH), (ENOUGH)

#189 Used to Build a Snowman

Possible answers: CARROT, COAL, SNOW, STICKS, (STONES)

#190 NYC Avenues

Possible answers: BROADWAY, FIFTH, MADISON, PARK, (SECOND), (FIRST), (ELEVENTH)

#191 Accessories

Possible answers: BELT, BRACELET, TIE, WATCH, (CHARM)

#199 Name Prefixes

Possible answers: GEN, MS, PROF, REV, (DR)

#200 Parts of a Car

Possible answers: BUMPER, HOOD, TIRE, TRUNK, (DASH)

#201 Single Letter Homophones

Possible answers: BEE, EX, GEE, JAY, (TEE)

#203 New Years-Related

Possible answers: BALL, COUNTDOWN, FIREWORKS, KISS, (PARTY), (RESOLUTION), (CHAMPAGNE)

#207 Gift-Giving Accessories

Possible answers: BOW, BOX, CARD, WRAPPING, (MESSAGE)

#210 Kinds of Exams

Possible answers: BAR, FINAL, ORAL, PHYSICAL, (EYE)

#211 Long, Skinny Objects

Possible answers: POLE, ROD, STAFF, STICK, (CLUB)

#212 Cooking Elements

Possible answers: ACID, FAT, HEAT, SALT, (PEPPER), (SMOKE)

#213 Seen at a Casino

Possible answers: CARDS, CHIPS, DICE, SLOTS, (POKER)

#213 Ways to Prepare Cheese

Possible answers: CRUMBLE, MELT, SHRED, SLICE, (GRATE)

#217 Thieve

Possible answers: PINCH, ROB, STEAL, SWIPE, (JACK)

#218 Medicine Formats

Possible answers: CAPSULE, CREAM, SYRUP, TABLET, (POD)

#221 Colors

Possible answers: BLUE, GREEN, WHITE, YELLOW, (SCARLET)

#222 Minced Oaths

Possible answers: CURSES, DARN, RATS, SHOOT, (FUDGE), (NUTS)

#224 Contains Wax

Possible answers: CANDLE, CRAYON, HONEYCOMB, SEAL, (EAR)

#229 Baseball-Related

Possible answers: BALL, BASE, BAT, GLOVE, (STRIKE)

#233 Mario Power-ups

Possible answers: FEATHER, STAR, MUSHROOM, FLOWER, (HAMMER)

#234 _____Pit

Possible answers: BARBECUE, ORCHESTRA, SNAKE, TAR, (FIRE)

#235 Make Shorter

Possible answers: CLIP, CUT, PARE, TRIM, (PRUNE)

#235 Muscular

Possible answers: BUILT, JACKED, RIPPED, SWOLE, (TRIM), (BUFF)

#237 Farm Fixtures

Possible answers: COOP, PEN, STABLE, STY, (RANGE)

#238 Unexciting

Possible answers: BORING, DULL, MUNDANE, VANILLA, (ROUTINE), (DRY)

#239 Ecclesiastical Titles

Possible answers: BISHOP, CARDINAL, PASTOR, PRIOR, (BROTHER), (LORD)

#251 Media Attention

Possible answers: COVERAGE, EXPOSURE, PRESS, PUBLICITY, (MEDIA)

#254 Little Bit of Liquid

Possible answers: BEAD, GLOB, DROP, TEAR, (DRIP)

#257 Shades of Green

Possible answers: OLIVE, FOREST, LIME, MINT, (CACTUS)

#260 Ilk

Possible answers: KIND, SORT, TYPE, VARIETY, (MANNER)

#263 Propel into the Air

Possible answers: HOP, JUMP, LEAP, SPRING, (VAULT)

#266 Large Amount

Possible answers: MASS, SEA, SLEW, TON, (WAVE)

#266 Fall under Pressure

Possible answers: BUCKLE, CAVE, COLLAPSE, GIVE, (FLOP)

#268 Pop Stars

Possible answers: GRANDE, MARS, STYLES, SWIFT, (LEGEND)

#269 Found at an Airport

Possible answers: HANGAR, RUNWAY, TARMAC, TERMINAL, (WINDSOCK)

#269 Ends in an Article of Clothing (A Mac is a raincoat)

Possible answers: FOXGLOVE, GUMSHOE, TURNCOAT, WINDSOCK, (TARMAC), (LAWSUIT)

#271 Food Preservation Techniques

Possible answers: CAN, CURE, DRY, FREEZE, (SPICE)

#272 Space_____

Possible answers: BAR, CADET, HEATER, STATION, (BLANKET)

#273 Keyboard Keys

Possible answers: COMMAND, CONTROL, OPTION, SHIFT, (SPACE)

#283 Seen at a Sports Stadium

Possible answers: ASTROTURF, JUMBOTRON, SCOREBOARD, SKYBOX, (KISSCAM), (JOURNEYMAN)

#284 Animals

Possible answers: COW, DOE, HEN, EWE, (YAK)

#284 Palindromes

Possible answers: BIB, EYE, GAG, POP, (EWE)

#285 Olympic Sports

Possible answers: BREAKING, HOCKEY, TRAMPOLINE, SKELETON, (CRICKET), (SQUASH), (VOLLEYBALL)

#289 Plant Growths

Possible answers: BLOOM, BUD, SHOOT, SPROUT, (CORONA)

#290 Quarrel

Possible answers: FIGHT, ROW, SCRAP, TIFF, (WAR)

#290 Games of Chance (Poker is technically a game of skill but it's still highly associated with chance)

Possible answers: BINGO, LOTTERY, ROULETTE, WAR, (POKER)

#291 Whale Species

Possible answers: BLUE, FIN, GRAY, RIGHT, (PILOT)

#293 Food Preservation Techniques

Possible answers: CANS, CURES, SALTS, SMOKES, (JAMS), (PICKLES)

#296 Thrust

Possible answers: JAB, POKE, PROD, STICK, (ELBOW)

#301 _____Horse

Possible answers: CHARLEY, CRAZY, DARK, GIFT, (PRIZE)

#302 Brief Moment

Possible answers: FLASH, HEARTBEAT, JIFF, WINK, (ZIP)

#302 Dispute

Possible answers: CLASH, TANGLE, SCRAP, TIFF, (SPAT)

#303 Hair Care Items

Possible answers: BRUSH, COMB, DRYER, IRON, (OIL)

#307 Seen at the Circus

Possible answers: CLOWN, RING, TENT, TRAPEZE, (LION)

#310 Parts of a Theatre

Possible answers: BALCONY, BOX, ORCHESTRA, STAGE, (FLOOR), (FLAT)

#312 Golden_____

Possible answers: FLEECE, GIRLS, PARACHUTE, RULE, (MEAN)

#315 Starting with the Same Sound

Possible answers: CYMBAL, SCIMITAR, SIMMER, SYMPHONY, (SYMBOL)

#318 Mexican Food-Related

Possible answers: CILANTRO, LIME, ONION, SALSA, (PICO), (WRAP), (MOLE)

#328 _____Sale

Possible answers: BAKE, CLEARANCE, GARAGE, SAMPLE, (YARD)

#329 Enjoy

Possible answers: FANCY, LOVE, RELISH, SAVOR, (LIKE)

#330 Quantity

Possible answers: FEW, MANY, SEVERAL, SOME, (COUPLE), (HANDFUL)

#333 Restrict

Possible answers: CHECK, CONTAIN, CURB, LIMIT, (CAP)

#334 Things that Spin

Possible answers: CAROUSEL, GLOBE, RECORD, TOP, (MERCURY)

#336 Cuts of Meat

Possible answers: CHUCK, FLANK, LOIN, ROUND, (RIB)

#339 Forthright

Possible answers: DIRECT, FRANK, OPEN, STRAIGHT, (PLAIN)

#342 Games

Possible answers: CATEGORIES, CHARADES, FISHBOWL, WEREWOLF, (MOUSETRAP)

#345 Billiards-Related

Possible answers: BALL, CHALK, CUE, RACK, (POCKET)

#348 Things You can Crack

Possible answers: EGG, KNUCKLES, SMILE, WINDOW, (CORN)

#351 _____Iron

Possible answers: PUMP, STEAM, TIRE, WAFFLE, (FLAT)

#355 Things People Shake

Possible answers: HANDS, MARACA, POLAROID, SNOWGLOBE, (BODY)

Anyone know of a good iPhone/iPad app for conducting site visits? i.e. recording measurements, plotting locations of powedoors, shapes of room, making notes etc that I can then take back to the office and turn into a useful plan/signal flow diagram?
Is there one that will run on an iPhone 12 and allow me to use the camera to measure a room, and if so how accurate is it? I'm only looking for like the nearest foot....

Hey, Reddit! I just wanted to give you guys some more stories about my Kevin, who is, unfortunately, the supplier of my genetic material (ie, he’s my father.) For those who missed the first stories, you can find the link here: https://www.reddit.com/StoriesAboutKevin/comments/16byk04/my_dad_the_kevin/
There were some excellent responses to the first post, including several requests for a part two. Myself and my brother (who goes by the username u/undercookedbrotato for the purposes of this thread) sat down together and cobbled together some more memories of Kevin, along with our Mom. And you know what? It truthfully was kinda painful. Kevin was cruel and selfish. He sacrificed the financial stability of his family for his own short-term happiness and actively tried to sabotage his spouse’s and his children’s academics and careers for no other reason than he was jealous. We’re just thankful that Kevin is also unbelievably moronic, and so most of these ploys ended quickly. We laugh now, because what else is there to do?
Anyway, just a quick note about me and u/undercookedbrotato. There’s a big age gap between us. I was born in the early ‘80s, and I wasn’t born until the mid-90s. The end result is that both of us have stories of Kevin that span 40 years. Kevin, himself, is a Baby Boomer, and has been inflicted upon this world for nearly seven decades.
A few things to remind our readers of: Kevin failed to achieve much of anything due to his ineptitude, laziness, and sense of entitlement. He is horrible with money and was frequently unfaithful during his marriage. He successfully summited the peak of Dunning-Kruger’s “Mount Stupid” and took pride in never descending. Summiting ANYTHING was amazing for Kevin; he only stood at 5’1”, and his vertical challenges would send him into a sputtering rage if anybody made a comment about it. He loved weather, porn, and amateur radio, and drove everybody nuts with his obsessions.
And here’s one more thing about Kevin: the man was made of teflon. We’re not quite sure why providence likes him so much, but he seemingly is always escaping from the consequences of his bad behavior–or he is at least able to foist them off on somebody else.
Kevin is still alive, but this entire thing is written like he’s not. You see, Kevin has developed Alzheimer’s, and now he spends his days in a memory care unit. A rather inglorious end to a life defined by snatching defeat from the jaws of victory. And maybe that’s for the best.
As before, we’ve selected only the juiciest bits. If this update seems a little more bitter than the last, I think you’ll see why. Apologies in advance. So anyway, without further ado . . . the continuing adventures of our Dad, the Kevin.
*Kevin had done a stint of active duty in the Air Force. The fact that he had managed to complete a term of enlistment without getting himself or somebody else killed still mystifies us. We’re even further gobsmacked when we realize that he somehow got promoted a few times, which is proof of the statement that God looks out for drunks, children, and the incompetent. Our father probably was smack dab in the middle of that particular Venn diagram.
*I once got a betta fish for Christmas. Since the family lived in Arizona at the time, it could get pretty cold. Mom once showed Kevin how to put the betta’s glass bowl on a small heating pad and turn it on low to keep the fish warm. Mom was very clear to put it on “low,” and never, ever “high.” She then went out of town on a conference and OH COME ON YOU KNOW WHERE THIS IS GOING.
*At least the new betta fish was pretty.
*While in the active duty Air Force, Kevin decided to prank his unit First Sergeant. Said First Sergeant had a specialty baseball cap that read “1SGT”, or at least had similar lettering. Kevin snuck into his NCO’s office, carefully peeled the letters off the “S” and “T” from the hat, and inserted, “E” and “G” in their place. The hat now read “1EGG.” This had the potential for being a funny prank had Kevin not raided the key when he was pulling staff duty and then destroyed his superior’s personal belongings. Kevin got in trouble and was always mystified as to why people were mad at him.
*Kevin loves weather. When Kevin got sent on temporary duty (TDY) to Montana, he was ecstatic when a tornado formed above the dormitories. So he ran outside and took pictures. The pictures were cool, but the fact remains that Kevin is fucking stupid.
*When the Cold War ended, Kevin took a separation bonus from the Air Force. The intent was that he would use the money as a cushion until he found a new job and his wife finished grad school. Instead, Kevin moved the family out to New Mexico because he had a job interview (no, not an offer . . . an interview.) Yes, it’s as idiotic as it sounds.
*When Kevin separated from the Air Force, the guys in his unit decided to celebrate his departure. They did this by grabbing Kevin, handcuffing his hands behind his back, drenching him with a garden hose, dumping flour over him and then smacking him with water-filled condoms from the roof of the building. Then they left him out in the sun for a little while for good measure.
*This hazing ritual was Kevin’s own idea. He had wanted to do it to the last guy who left the unit, but nobody would go along with it. Kevin was, as Shakespeare would say, hoisted by his own petard.
*Kevin’s chain of command not only knew about his upcoming hazing, but they actively participated. To his credit, Kevin thought it was hysterical . . . until his wife pointed out that friends don’t really do that to each other, and the last guy who left had gotten a cake instead of a face full of condoms. Kevin was then salty about it for decades.
*A year after leaving the Air Force, Kevin had to move into his mother-in-law’s house because he was legally bankrupt. We don’t know where his separation bonus went, and we’re afraid to find out.
*In our previous post, we erroneously stated that it took Kevin nine years to get a Bachelor’s degree. This was incorrect, and for that, we apologize. You see, we just found his transcripts while cleaning out the storage unit, and have found new information. It actually took him twelve . . . if we mark from the completion of his Associate’s. His transcripts show him starting college in 1983 and graduating in 2004. It’s a pity they don’t offer pensions for being a student. And this doesn’t even cover all the degree mill places he likely signed up for . . .
*At the end of his Bachelor’s degree, Kevin had withdrawn from seventeen(!) classes throughout his collegiate career.
*As stated in the previous post, Kevin spent much of our childhoods unemployed. In a bid to get money, Kevin went back and joined the Air Force Reserves. The only income he made for years was his “one weekend a month, two weeks a year” dough. Despite this, he somehow managed to not get kicked out, even though he was frequently passed over for promotion, laughed out of his commander’s office when he asked about being promoted, and once had an entire skit at an Air Force Reserve unit black tie event devoted to mocking him.
*Kevin was sensitive about his short stature. When the eHarmony website launched, Kevin went on a long diatribe about the website’s “heightist” policies and how shorter men were excluded from the dating pool. He disintegrated into quiet grumbling when Mom pressed him as to how he knew this. He blamed it on a friend complaining to him about it. Too bad that guy was 6’1”.
*Mom made all the money in the house due to working three jobs. Kevin figured that his money was his money, and so what little money he did make–as well as a good chunk of Mom’s–disappeared on ham radio equipment, guns, penny stocks, MLMs, hookers, porn, and, bizarrely, musical instruments. WE HAVE SO MANY FUCKING VIOLINS.
*Kevin had played in his high school orchestra. Kevin took this to mean that he was good at the violin. Kevin once showed up to a college jam session. We don’t know what happened, but Kevin came home, went to his bedroom, and cried. He never played the violin again.
*Kevin decided to save money for Christmas one year by getting into wine making. He Googled it and then set jugs of fermenting grapes behind the toilet. Then, on Christmas Eve, he slapped floppy disk labels on the front, wrote “Kevin’s Valley” in big block print on the sticker, and slipped them into gift bags. That shit made my aunt barf. Kevin hated to be reminded of the time he made bad pruno for Christmas and got people sick.
*Kevin was obsessive about floppy disks. He downloaded grainy .jpeg porn images onto them and then labeled them with names like “Big Blondes in Double Trouble” or “Mother Does Her Duty.” I mean, literally, he wrote these on the sticker labels, alphabetized them, and kept them in a disk caddy next to the family computer. Our father was . . . weird, and not in a good way. This has made cleaning out his storage unit tremendously unfun.
*Do you know those scuzzy payday loan places? They’re usually run out of old Pizza Huts and have pawn shops attached to them. They may even have bullet proof glass when you talk to the cashier. Most people avoid them. Our father, on the other hand, looked at those places and would think, “yeah, that’s a GREAT idea.” He seriously borrowed money from those lenders for fun and then wondered why his shit would get repossessed.
*Kevin had a credit score in the 300s. He didn’t know why.
*Back in the early 2000s, there were commercials that would run late at night. They were by a guy called Matthew Lesko, and he would obnoxiously scream at you to buy his book to “get free money!” while wearing a garish suit adorned with question marks like he was some sort of Great Value Riddler. You can see it for yourself here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NECn-uohptg . Anyway, I saw this commercial and said, “what type of idiot would buy that book?” and then walked into the living room to find Kevin reading his.
*Kevin once came home with a “family film” on video tape and put it on in the middle of the day. That “family film” was “Death Wish” with Charles Bronson. He got mad when mom made him take it back to the video store.
*Kevin and his wife were fighting one night and Kevin specified that he was going to go get a divorce attorney. Mom told him to go right ahead, because he didn’t have money to hire one anyway, and that she was willing to pay for his. This shut him up.
*Later on, Kevin became obsessed with the book “Rich Dad, Poor Dad,” despite the fact he never read it beyond the introduction. I received at least three copies as Christmas gifts, and undercookedbrotato is sure to have at least one floating around somewhere. Spoiler: the book is now regarded as inaccurate feel-good self-help schlock.
*When Kevin finally got a full-time job again, he was quickly removed from day shift due to his incompetence and put on night shift. He complained about being “punished” and would not tolerate any discussion that it at least allowed him to keep his job. Kevin went to work on night shift and was immediately written up for watching movies and sleeping. His argument was that if they didn’t want him watching movies or sleeping, then they shouldn’t have put him on the night shift.
*Kevin left work one day to find a coworker putting a computer in his truck. Kevin asked his coworker where he got his computer, and he said that he got it from the company. Kevin went running back inside and grabbed HR and told them that his coworker was stealing computers. As it turns out, his company had a program where employees could buy outdated hardware and equipment, and that’s what was going on. Kevin didn’t understand why his coworker was mad.
*Kevin’s Air Force Reserve detachment deployed to Jordan in the spring of 2005 and they stayed at the Ryatt Hotel in Amman. He came back in early summer. On November 9th, the hotel he had stayed in was attacked by a suicide bomber. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2005_Amman_bombings . Kevin claimed that the fact that the hotel he stayed in was destroyed six months after he left gave him “war PTSD.”
*Do you know that Kanye West episode of South Park where Cartman steals Jimmy’s joke about fish sticks and every time Cartman tells the story, he makes himself look better and more heroic? That was how the hotel bombing was for Kevin. Every time he told the story, the bombing happened closer and closer to his departure from Jordan, until the last time we heard it, he was “running around trying to get people to listen to him about an imminent attack” but that “nobody would believe him.” Amazingly, the attack happened “just a few hours after they left”and not the six months that actually occurred.
*Kevin bought tickets for an Ollie North book signing. He didn’t understand why nobody in the family was impressed.
*Kevin is a bit of a hypochondriac. He once came home from the doctor screaming that his kidneys were failing and that he was going to die soon. He had the entire family riled up and had Mom crying. It turns out that, while he does indeed have kidney disease, it’s nowhere near fatal and can be controlled with medication.
*Kevin once woke up, went to the bathroom, and exited the bathroom shaking. He then called out of work and reported to the emergency room due to finding a “reddish, bloody discharge” around the head of his penis. He was terrified that he had some sort of cancer. What was this mystery secretion, you ask? Lipstick.
*We’re horrified by this story on a number of levels. First, there’s the idea of dad getting a blowjob, which is terrible. Secondly, now that his infidelity has come to light, we must acknowledge that said lipstick could have belonged to any number of women. And then, finally, we must face the realization that Dad didn’t wash his dick. This world is garbage and I hate it.
*Years later, a kid in our hometown got arrested for breaking and entering somebody else’s house, and he happened to have the same last name as us. Dad cut the clipping out of the newspaper, scanned it into his computer, and emailed it to his friends and associates claiming that he had cheated on Mom and that this kid was his illegitimate offspring. He said this was a “joke.” Mom did not find this funny. In retrospect, we don’t think he was joking. We wonder how many half-siblings we have.
*Kevin decided he wanted new ham radio gear. Kevin had no money. Kevin decided he was willing to trade for it. What did he trade? The dog. We’re still pissed.
*Kevin got mad at me for “marrying outside my race” (I’m white, my wife is Filipina.) He then told me that I was being cut out of the will. I told him to go ahead, because there was nothing to inherit anyway. The idea that his son was willing to go no contact hurt him less than the realization that he had no wealth.
*Mom once went up to Alaska to visit me out, as my wife had just had a baby. This left u/undercookedbrotato at home with Kevin. Kevin decided that he was grown and needed to be out on his own, so he gave him a week to leave the house. He was only fifteen. When Mom and I called him and gave him an earful, his claim was that he forgot how old he was and then rescinded his edict.
*In our last post, I wrote about how Kevin had decided to start a real estate company despite not having any money. Or real estate to sell. Or clients. Or a real estate license. But there were some things I forgot to mention–Kevin had gone out and bought a car to advertise his latent business, and even tried to get a car wrap put on it. On top of that, he registered as an LLC and used my social security number to register me as a co-owner with the IRS. I did not give him permission to do this and only found out when I was fucking audited. Fortunately, the business never made any money and I got out of the audit without having to pay any money, so yay?
*Kevin then decided to start a self-defense business, but he didn’t want to put any time or effort into marketing or sales or researching laws. Instead, he just bought a bunch of tasers and pepper spray online and then shipped them to my house. When I called and wondered why there were a bunch self-defense weapons of nebulous legality sitting on my porch, I was told to go sell them and pass along the money. I refused, and the next time Kevin visited, he was given his box back. I don’t know how Kevin got rid of them, and I’m not sure I care.
*Kevin was well-known for mangling popular idioms. His most famous was “hindsight is 100%”, although he also encouraged people to be “fair and objectionable.” When pressed about his philosophy about the human condition, Kevin was not shy about sharing how he felt the world was out to get him–despite the fact that people around him spent most of their time protecting him from himself.
*Kevin likes space stuff and Kevin likes women. So Kevin really likes women astronauts. He could barely contain himself when he met one. He friended her on Facebook and was then, unsurprisingly, creepy. He got blocked and he was crushed.
*Kevin once had a wet dream involving his female supervisor. He told her about it.
*When Kevin was finally fired from his job for having porn on his computer, a group of women met him at the door and told him they were thankful he was gone.
*Kevin registered for Truth Social and was buying Donald Trump gold coins from randos on the Internet. He never received any of them.
*After Kevin got caught cheating on our Mom, he claimed that his “war PTSD” made him do it and that we “couldn’t begin to understand the horrors of war” when confronted. Unfortunately for Kevin, I served in the Sunni Triangle with the 2nd Cavalry during OIF 1 and have actual PTSD (seriously, there’s a slip of paper signed by a doctor and pills and appointments and everything. It’s awesome.) Kevin didn’t have a good explanation for why I hadn’t cheated on MY wife.
*Kevin then (badly) tried to defend his infidelity by texting me advertisements for local Craigslist hookers. His logic was that he would prove how “irresistible” they were, and then people would sympathize with him! At best, this was him grasping at straws–at worst, it was him actively trying to sabotage my marriage. Anyway, and on a completely unrelated note, Kevin hasn’t seen his grandkids in a long time.
*After Mom left, Kevin told me that he’d just move in with me. He got a courtesy ride to the retirement home instead.
*After Kevin was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s, I started getting collections calls from one of those tribal payday loan places. It turns out that Dad had borrowed money from them at some point in the past. When I called them up and explained that my father was mentally incapacitated, they then shared that his account age was ten years old and he was a “gold tier customer.” I don’t know what that means, but I’m horrified, especially since they’re not regulated by the FDIC and charge 300% interest.
“But hey!” you might be thinking, “this just sounds like the venting of a pair of maladjusted adult children with daddy issues taking their umbridge to the internet.” And you would be right, of course. But you don’t have to just take our word for what a menace Kevin was.
While cleaning out the family storage unit, I found Dad’s old high school yearbooks. Let’s see what Kevin’s peers had to write, shall we?
Farewells and Salutations Left in Kevin’s Yearbooks
“You are the only person I know who’s temper is shorter than he is. You’re nuts.”--Allen
“Kevin, to a very nice guy. Even though you cut me down, I don’t mind. Nice knowing you.”--Ricky
“Kevin, you’re a real nice guy that works at a store and is obscene.”--Barbara
“You’re a strange Lithuanian dwarf.”--Eugene
AUTHOR’S NOTE: The joke here, of course, is entirely on Eugene. Kevin’s not Lithuanian.
“To Kevin, alias Shorty; I am sorry that I have to disagree with you on the little matter of who is taller. I am, Shorty, and you had better start facing life the way you should.”--Cathy
“Good luck. You’re going to need it!”--Carol
“Kevin, you have certainly added ‘life’ to the classroom! At times, however, wouldn’t it have been better to divert your energy to studying?”--Mrs. Frey
“To a nice guy I wish would go somewhere.”--John
“Good luck with your girlfriend who’s coming back from the Azores.”--Sue
Author’s Note: Kevin apparently decided to one-up the kid with a girlfriend that you wouldn’t know, because she lives in Canada. I gotta give Kevin this–the Azores were a creative touch.
“To the dumbest guy in electronics class that I still hate.”--Daniel
“A real weird kid in my driver’s ed class. Good luck when trying not to hit people (so far you’ve been lucky).”--Byron
“Kevin, I guess you’re alright so I give you the privilege of having my autograph. To a very small punk who can’t keep his feet off anybody’s desk.”--Michael
“Kevin, you’re a real slob, but outside of that you’re alright. You’re lousy in math, but I guess you can’t help it.”--Bill
“Kevin, even though you call me fat, I still consider you a friend of mine.”--Laurie
“A screwy guy that has just about as much sense as a pervert in an elementary school.”--Tim
Author’s note: Ouch, Tim.
“Kevin, we expect you to come in and sand down the desk.”--Mr. Bell, Woodshop
“To a little squirt tattle tale.”--Samantha
“Kevin, how have I stood it?!? You could go so far if you’d only use your capabilities. Remember the parable of the man and the talents? Good luck.”--Mrs. Siwa
Author’s note: Mrs. Siwa seems to be referencing a Biblical story (Matthew 25:14) wherein a master gives three of his servants bags of gold to see what they will do with them. Two of the servants invest the gold and then give their master the earnings, which makes him happy, and he allows them to keep some of the gold. The third servant buries his gold in the ground like a fucking idiot and so gives his master back a bag of dirty, muddy coins. The master, unsurprisingly, is unamused, and so orders his servant to be bound hand and foot and thrown out “into the dark where there will be a weeping and a gnashing of teeth.” Mrs. Siwa got no chill.
“Kevin, you’re really weird. That’s the only way to describe you.”--Deb
“To a kid I wish would go and play in traffic sometimes.”--Lance
“I hope you go far in this world. And soon.”--Larry
“To a very nice friend, even if you are short. And if the world is lucky, you will fall over dead.”--Lee
Author’s note: Goddamn, Lee. Saying the quiet part out loud, are we?
Kevin, Kevin, Kevin. Percy Shelly once penned a poem that reminds us of him so very well. One stanza in “Ozymandias” states, “look upon my works, ye mighty, and despair!” Of course, the reader is then treated to imagery of Ozymandias’s fallen kingdom.
And that’s Kevin for you. A monarch is his own imagination. A maladaptive malcontent in the public’s. A life defined by failure, incompetence, rage, and laziness, with only the detritus of his own failed enterprises to keep him company in his declining years. No thing beside remains, indeed.
Rest well and rest quietly, Kevin. We’ve earned it.

PART ONE THOUSAND AND FIFTEEN
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Sunday
Mason straightened at the sound of an incoming message on his phone, lifting the screen just enough to read it. Then he jumped to his feet.
Khai: I’m here.
“YES!” he shouted, slapping his hands together as he took off for the living apartment’s front door. He knew Khai wouldn’t have come the mortal way and, as such, fully expected him to be on the other side of that door rather than the massive entry door to the whole floor.
“Mas’n!” Maddy cried, causing Mason to skid to a halt. Both Maddy and Levi were sitting with their backs to the wall the living room shared with the half-bath, watching the big screen TV above Llyr’s chair.
Well, Maddy was. Levi looked partially lobotomized.
“Hey, guys! I didn’t expect you to still be here.”
“Lucas ducked out to grab us some supplies, though he should be back by now.” Levi patted himself down and must have realised he was only wearing boxers and a shirt … as in no pockets for a phone. He eased himself forward and gently balanced his weight on his medical boot before shoving up onto his feet in one move.
“You know, medically, that’s not doing you any—”
“Zip it,” Levi grumbled, waving his lecture aside.
“Where ya goin’, Daddy?”
“I’m just going to our room to get my phone and find out what’s keeping Uncle Luke.”
“Unca Lu-cas,” Maddy corrected, emphasising the second syllable.
The fact that a three-year-old could get it right and her father couldn’t had Mason snicker-snorting, though he quickly covered his mouth and nose with both hands to hide the evidence.
Levi’s filthy glare still said plenty. “Right. Uncle Lucas … and Auntie Charlie,” he drawled without looking back at her. He hobbled around the couch to the hallway. “Be right back, Peaches.”
Mason would’ve loved to stand there and chat, but his boss was at the door. He moved through the alcove and opened the front door. “You came,” he said, beaming up at his newest mentor a beat before stepping back to let him in. “Come in.”
Khai stepped into the apartment and removed his shoes without asking before entering the living room. “This is more like what I was expecting of Llyr’s residence,” he admitted, spotting and dismissing Maddy sitting on the sofa, who was staring at him wide-eyed.
“It’s okay, bunny. This is my boss from work.” When Khai didn’t answer, Mason nudged him. “Say ‘hello’ to Maddy.”
Only then did Khai’s eyes find the little girl. “Hello.”
“How in the world are you a father?” Mason muttered more to himself, then overcompensated with a huge grin. “He’s gonna help me study so I can get even smarter. Isn’t that cool?”
But Maddy’s eyes never left Khai.
Meanwhile, Khai focused on Boyd’s carving on the coffee table. “A housewarming gift from Kala?” he asked, gesturing to the piece.
“No,” Mason chuckled. “Though the big guy’ll get a huge kick out of knowing you thought so.”
Khai frowned and moved closer to the carving. “Are you sure? This is exceptional work…”
“Positive. Llyr gave him some … errr … special tools, so there’s no stopping him now.”
“Ahhh,” Khai said, with a nod of understanding, his eyes flicking once more to Maddy. “Well, your friend had better be careful. History is littered with people getting their hands on those types of special items or gaining some manner of assistance and then deluding themselves afterwards into thinking the outcome was their own. Look at Jason and the Argonauts. He had no idea he had Zeus’ son in his crew when Hercules accompanied him on his adventures.”
Knowing all that information would flow right over Maddy’s head, Mason squinted at his boss. “That’s the golden fleece dude, isn’t it?”
Khai’s painful wince would’ve been funny under any other circumstances.
“Hey, I’m a vet. Not a mythological historian.”
“Anyway, please tell him not to believe the skill is his. It never ends well when they do that.”
Mason didn’t want to argue anymore, despite knowing Hell would freeze over twice before he’d say anything of the kind to Boyd. “Did you want some lunch before we start?” he asked instead.
“No, I’m good, thank you.”
Mason turned his attention to Maddy, who was still staring at them like a deer in the headlights. “You stay right there, baby girl, okay? Daddy said he’ll be right back.”
“’kay.”
A few seconds later, Levi passed them in the hallway on their way to Mason’s room. “Hey,” Levi said, nodding at Khai before extending his hand. “Levi. Levi Dobson.”
“Khai Nasc—Khai Hart,” Khai returned, shaking his hand without exerting any other emotion.
Levi grinned, obviously catching the slip. “I figured you had to fit in somewhere to be allowed into the inner sanctum.” He glanced at Mason. “Luke said he was—Lucas! I mean Lucas said he was on his way back.”
Mason smirked and nodded. “We’ll be in my room if anyone’s looking for us. Studying,” he stressed when Levi raised an eyebrow. Mason pointed briefly at Khai. “His wife is expecting, and his sister is my boss. So get your head out of the gutter. He’s here to help me study for my finals.”
“Nice,” Levi said, bobbing his head. “Sorry, in this household, anything’s possible.”
“You have no idea,” Mason muttered under his breath as Levi headed back into the living room. And speaking of oddities, he suddenly remembered Brock was still using his gaming system. “Before we go in, my youngest roommate is in there playing online games in the corner. But he’s truly in the inner circle and knows all about you and the divine, so you don’t have to watch what you say or use the phrase or anything because it won’t work on him anyway.”
“You have an interesting household, Mason.”
You have no idea, Mason repeated in his thoughts as he reached for the doorknob, opened the door and stepped inside. “It’s awesome, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.” He gestured briefly at the gaming machine on his way to his desk. “Brock, Khai. Khai, Brock.” He didn’t bother looking at Khai. “He probably won’t hear you, but just covering bases in case he’s in a lull between fight scenes.”
Khai didn’t respond to either of them, so Mason assumed he’d done something to know Brock was, in fact, fully submerged in his game. “Here, you have my seat, and I’ll go and steal another from Sam’s office.”
Mason returned a minute or so later, pushing Sam’s giant executive chair ahead of him.
“I thought you said Sam was against wealth.”
“Yeah, well, he’s drowning in it, so it’s a case of sink or swim.” Mason twisted it beside his own and was about to sit down when Khai lifted himself out of Mason’s chair and slid into the new one.
“You sit where you usually do. I’m the only one between us who can stretch enough to reach everything,” he said in explanation.
A few minutes later, Khai showed him precisely what he meant by elongating his arm over the five-foot desk to take control of the Sectra table with fingers that sprouted dozens more to program an image of a feline’s shattered back leg and hip. With so many fingers working at once, Mason couldn’t ascertain what the parameters were before the image appeared on the screen.
“Okay,” Khai said, pointing at the display. “You have a distraught client in Consult Two, bringing with her a large Maine coon who was hit by her father’s plough while it was clearing snow. She’s had the cat now for over ten years, ever since her mother died.”
“That’s a low blow,” Mason growled at him.
“You were the one to point out the emotional element, Mason. Now, back to the board. You’ve done an initial check of the hip and found it broken in numerous places and the foot is hanging by the skin with the bone exposed at the ankle. After an x-ray and CT scans, this is what you see.” He refocused on Mason. “What do you do?”
Mason took a deep breath to clear his thoughts, putting himself into the roleplay. The x-rays showed the hip had been wrenched free of the spine, with the left side shattered in several places. His first instinct had been to end the animal’s suffering, but the owner’s connection became part of the equation. “How long ago did this happen? What does the bloodwork show?” Maybe there was a chance to salvage this. Maybe.
More buttons on the Sectra table were pushed, creating a fake bloodwork report that showed no sign of blood poisoning yet, which only meant the accident was recent enough to have not had that complication. More proof that he was a beloved pet that had been rushed to the clinic.
The rest of the information was far from good. “We need to find out how bad the damage is to the sciatic nerves in both hind legs.” He stood up and went over to the scan, pointing at the crushed bone and the subsequent mass on the CT. “It’s caught up in this mess, it could be damaged as well as pinned. If he’s really lucky, it might just be pinned, in which case surgery to release the pressure is an option.” He looked Khai in the face. “Right?”
Khai tilted his head. “Depends. What do you tell the owner?”
“The truth. Always the truth. We can’t tell the extent of the damage to the legs until we operate, though, at this point, it’s not looking good. In fact, I’d let her know before we proceeded that it was as bad as she feared and that euthanasia was a strong possibility.
“She needs to know that if she agrees to the surgery and we open him up and find the nerves in both legs are severed, no amount of work on our part will make a difference. I’d also tell her to stay close to the phone, for we’d need her to make that final decision.”
Mason’s heart ached under the weight of the news to an owner that didn’t even exist. “And then I’d offer her a hug because I think she’d need one.”
“How do you do that?’ Khai asked, breaking the illusion of the role play.
“Do what?”
“How do you engage so thoroughly with people … even ones that don’t exist? You act like you personally know them…”
“I put myself in their shoes, Khai. Or I put someone I care about in their shoes. If it’s an older woman, I put Mom there. If it’s a young kid – I picture my sister there. Either way, I make it personal.”
Khai hummed thoughtfully.
“What?”
“Just thinking how unfortunate it is that most of my immediate family are too old for this to be applicable…”
“Isn’t your wife—uh…mate—whatever you call them…isn’t she pregnant right now?”
“She is,” Khai said cautiously.
“Right. So, there’s your touchstone for pregnant women. You wouldn’t be blunt if it were her, would you?”
“I would,” Khai admitted. “Choi is a warrior. She’d rather have all the facts as soon as possible.”
“Even if the fact you had to relay was one of your other kids had accidentally been killed due to goofing off with their siblings while she was away?”
“That would then become a case of self-preservation. She would literally kill whoever had been tasked with watching over them and failed, even if it were me.”
“Your wife sounds scary.”
“She’s a blooded warrior, like all border veterans. Cross her at your own peril.”
“Okay, well, what about your kids? What if one of them comes in with a native pet that they’ve attached themselves to, and it’s been … I don’t know … bitten by a poisonous snake, and they want you to fix it.”
“Then I would.”
“I’m beginning to see what the problem is here,” Mason huffed in frustration. “C’mon, bossman. If you want to feel empathy for your clients, you need to see the heartache or the hope that that person has in your ability to cure their beloved pet and ask yourself ‘how would I feel if that was….’ And put in a name. It won’t take long for that stance to become a default setting because caring and healing is what we’re all about, right?”
“That may work here, but once I go back to the border, empathy isn’t a luxury I can afford.”
“Maybe not in the heat of battle, but once the emergency is over, a little empathy for those around you might bring you into a tighter team.”
“Why did you want to be a vet?”
Mason was startled by the question. “What do you mean?”
“You could make a lot more money going into human medicine, and your personality, for the most part, is well suited to psychology. Why did you choose animals?”
Mason’s grin was immediate. “Maybe because they can’t tell me no when I’m trying to help them.”
“Don’t deflect.”
Mason hadn’t meant to, but that had always been his go-to answer and no one had ever called him on it. Now that Khai had, he honestly wasn’t sure about the whys of his decision. Thinking about it now, he realised while farming was in his blood, it wasn’t what ignited his passion. “I can’t picture my life not being surrounded by animals, but I wanted more out of life than just raising them.”
“High IQ and EQ.”
“High enough, anyway,” Mason argued, lifting his chin towards the gaming console in the corner. “Brock over there is a real genius. If he sat for an IQ test, he’d probably reset the top score.”
Khai glanced back at the machine the young man had wrapped around him. “Perhaps that’s why he seems so intent on trying to decrease it with computer games.”
Mason snickered.
[Next Chapter]
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((All comments welcome. Good or bad, I’d love to hear your thoughts 🥰🤗))
I made a family tree/diagram of the Mystallian family that can be found here
For more of my work, including WPs: Angel466 or an index of previous WPS here.
FULL INDEX OF BOB THE HOBO TO DATE CAN BE FOUND HERE!!