This life ive built myself is slowly crashing down around me. Im so unhappy i dont even know what to bitch about anymore.
Im the sole breadwinner in a household of three grown men, 4 dogs, and 2 little girls (half the week.). I support every party. I pay every bill. i pay every debt. I pay for every habit, every vice. Every new fucking toy and ooh this is so pretty/so cool. I drive to every event, i take people to work, I do the road trips, god forbid i ask anyone to pitch for gas.
Theres never anything left for me to spend on myself. Ya know whens it gonna be my turn? . In the past 10 years of my marriage ive sacrificed EVERYTHING, credit card payments, car maintenance, i quit talking to my mom, stopped talking to my brother, 2 aunts, my grandmother and one born again tweaker uncle (whom i ENJOYED), all to make my husband happy.
Ive gone through 7 cars, including my precious honda, all drove into smoking rubble. I took out loans. I got fat. I GOT FAT!
He held a job (one job) for two months before we got married. He still never paid one bill. Our roommate has been "looking" for a job since we let him move in, hes my husbands uncle so i guess I just let that shit slide too?
All we ever do is argue, we dont even have sex anymore, but that could be more due to my unhappiness, he still tries. Husbands drunk 3-4 nights a week with his friends, alternating houses, i dread the day they come to ours.
The bills are slowly getting to be too much to handle and i almost dont care anymore. I begged and borrowed and mooched my way out of family and friends so thats no good.
I started smoking weed and stress eating. More than halfway considering cashing out my 401k and just leaving.
He even ruined my good driving record... Fuck. My. Whole. Life.

Currently drinking:
5-9 servings of alcohol per day on weekdays.
Typically start around noon with a tallboy at lunch
Grab another tallboy before leaving work for the 1 hour commute home (I know, bad bad bad)
Two double mixed drinks at home. One with dinner, one after.
8-16 servings of alcohol per day on weekends
If there is lots to do around the house, I sometimes get so caught up that I forget to even drink
If not, usually put 1 serving of alcohol in my coffee (bailey's creamer or amaretto)
Open a beer by 10am, then two around noon with lunch, then another around 2pm
Finish up stuff around the house and make my first triple mixed drink around 5pm
Have dinner, and another triple mixed drink around 6:30pm
Depends on the night from here. May keep making mixed drinks, switch back to beer, or wine. May pass out early, may be up late, depends on the environment I’m in.
Been following this routine for about a year now. Had periods of more and periods of less drinking for the previous 8 years or so. I’ve taken a month or two off 100% sober here and there. Used to do it 2-3x a year, but have been lacking recently.

My drinking isn’t effecting my health much. Hangovers after heavy late nights suck, but If I keep it under 6 drinks, have 3 good meals, and get 8 hours of sleep, I’m fine.
I feel like I could do better at my job, but everyone in the office seems to praise me for the work I do.
My relationship with family, friends, and S.O. are great. I'm even told I am a great and calm communicator.
Finances are tight, but stable (lower-middle class America in general I suppose). Mortgage, car payment, student loans, etc. are all paid on time with a little extra money to spare for savings, date night, etc.

I know there is no such thing as a functional alcoholic. I’m just curious on how tightly my train is gripping the tracks. I've heard there are light/social drinkers, medium drinkers, heavy drinkers, and alcoholics. I think I am a heavy drinker, but want to make sure I'm not slipping into an unsustainable lifestyle

Im am having 3 account that are giving me a hard time and i was young and dumb.
1) Pentagon Credit union had issues with payment for the only reason that we where hit by a natural disaster a Hurricane ( i live in Puerto Rico) and didnt have power or internet access for almost 15 day the close the account. account was closed by credit grantor on 4/28/ 2018
2) Military Star Card is a credit card to buy inside military installations and this one i just forgot about it but paid everything in it. Last payment date was on 01/2020 but have no information of this account on transunion.
3) First bank auto lone, i bought a vehicle but the dealership never told me the car had a roleover balance from the previous owner and we had a agreement for 800 a month and my monthly payments came to roughly 1,100 monthly and voluntarily gave the car back, the bank never gave me any documentation to sign or disclosure. 6 month after this the were at my previous address looking for me to sign the documents for the off payment to cover and never contacted me again (never signed) have no data of balance but it still shows

So I don’t know how to start this but I meet this girl on a dating app and we were talking, everything was amazing even the first time we met up. She spent the night over because she was too drunk to drive home so was I, I was very hesitant because this person at that time was a stranger but we just vibe so well. After that day we just keep hanging out and exploring places in SD. I got to really get to know this person so well and deeply that we had so much in common, Music, ideas, etc.
I started to like this girl so much but the only thing I didn’t like was she was talking to her ex still but for a reason. She had to pay him back for rent which I thought It was totally fine but it started to get to a point where she was like “ugh he is just pissing me off and I can’t take this with him.” Also she would bring up certain things with him to me which I thought was weird to me because even though I knew they lived with each other about two years ago and broke up a year ago.
I never seen somebody talk about their ex so much even though it was all bad things about him but even still have contact with him. I would kinda tease her about it sometimes like “oh sounds like you guys are still together.” She denies it and says fucker I like you not him anymore but it got to a point I would say stuff like that out of concern which one day, we had a conversation about it and she said I would bring him up all the time.
I never dealt with that before, so even though I know this is wrong I went on a the same dating app I found her on and was looking and I saw her sister friend at the time. I didn’t know the friend at the time so I swipe on her and we didn’t match but I get a call from the girl I was talking to and she was telling me how could I do this and everything else, which she is right I should of never done that. I just felt like she was so drawn on her ex and having conversations with him that I was going try and see what else was out there but after that we came to a agreement on just keep talking to each other.
Months go by and we fall for each other, we aren’t in a relationship yet because I just feel so doubtful that it could work because in my mind she is still talking to her ex. She wants to be my girlfriend but I just kept telling her let’s wait because of the ex stuff, I didn’t tell her that but she got it. We have each others location and spring break comes, I don’t know what happened but my location stops working for her.
I leave to go back home. She gets worried about not seeing it and wants to fix it and I tried to fix it but it wouldn’t work for me even showing her that it didn’t but then I told her I’m going to be spending time with my family because I never get to see them because I play college football. she got that but it’s also my fault because I spent so much time with them and didn’t text her as much when I was back at home.
My birthday is in spring break so I got gifts from my family but I got crocs that had I heart N which was from my mom which represented my uncle who passed, His name started with a N. she’s worried that I might have a another girl back home. I tried telling her I don’t but I wanted her to come over since I was gone for a week and she had gifts for my birthday that past so everything was good.
She is over my place and is fine with staying until I got back from practice so I left then I get text messages from my family friend telling me she is texting her on instagram and somehow gets her phone number. I couldn’t go back home to ask why she is doing that since I was already at practice but after practice I call her and she is literally back at her house and telling me that I lied to her and that she is done with me.
She literally took an edible and drove home which I think is crazy but she is so high and I tell her, What is going on and she says I have proof of you lying to me and I told her send it to me. She takes forever to send it but she sends it to me and it’s my crocs with the N. She tries to say my family friend is the girl so we go back and forth but then she realize that it wasn’t and says sorry for leaving and she also got in an argument with her mom.
I tell her that we need to just slow down we are just dating and you are doing crazy things. She agrees and we kinda slow down, after this she is still stalking my family friend. she doesn’t know that my family friend has a boyfriend and keeps looking at her stories and thinks it’s me so she jumps to conclusions and breaks up with me. I keep tryna tell her it’s not me and she keeps saying it is but we come to a agreement again and she asks me why do I still wanna date her when she’s done that, I tell her I just like her so much and wanna see how far it can go.
This is true and still is because this is still fresh. weeks later she is having conversations with her ex but she already told him that she wants me and not him anymore. he didn’t wanna let go and she was just paying him back the money she owed him but he started to make conversation with her and they were just talking like friends. Couple weeks ago he confessed to her about wanting her back and wants her to drop me and come back to him but they have a long bad history and she told him “I’m not doing that to him, I want him in my life not you just move on.”
He literally pass out or something while driving because he wasn’t getting sleep or something and she calls me and tells me everything that went on and all that shit made me so mad. she still was talking to him because I knew he would do something like that but he gives her a ultimatum of it’s either me or him. She told me that and tells him the next day I’m sticking with him. She couldn’t and wouldn’t go back to that place he put her in so after that I’m pissed off about that whole shit and keeping contact with him.
A week ago, my family friends car stops working so she asks me to take her to target to get stuff and I did because why wouldn’t I help. I do that and we are just laughing and talking then I take a picture of her with my crocs half way in it and she posted it but next thing that happens is I get a text from the girl. She says fuck you, bye then blocks me and it hurt so fucking much like I still think about it and tried to tell her, I wasn’t doing anything with my family friend but I was blocked.
I start to post on my story and she just watches them and not saying anything. I don’t say anything as well but then she posts something about karma is coming for the people that lied to her and did her wrong which hurt because I truly wasn’t doing nothing. I didn’t wanna text her because I was still shocked that she would do that then days go by and she stops watching it.
I saw she keep going public and private on instagram so when she opened it again I like some new pictures of her then she texts and delete. I asked her what did she say and she said why am I liking her shit and I need to stop because my little girlfriend isn’t going like that like just being so petty. She tells me that she is going block me on Instagram too so I started feeling sad and told her don’t let me just talk to her.
I wasn’t even home, I was literally in a different state for a family trip which was two days ago but I tell her everything that I love her and wanna fix it. I don’t wanna lose her but she tells me she isn’t changing her mind and I’m begging her because I truly love this girl but we come to somewhat an agreement of seeing each other Tuesday. I got back in the state so I text her and tell her my flight is going be late maybe let me stay over at her place because I know her mom a little and her mom likes me.
I told her maybe I could do that and we can just talk but then she tells me that’s not a good idea and she isn’t doing that so I keep trying and trying but she says we can talk on the phone when I land so I said fine I’m cool with that. I landed and I was about to text her that I landed, can we talk now but before I went on instagram to see if she unfollowed people because I just couldn’t stop thinking about her being with someone else. I see she blocked me on instagram so I go to text her phone number and I was blocked too.
I had a whole letter for her and she hasn’t even seen it because I sent it after the messages went green but it just hurts so much because I want this girl like she just matches me. This just happened two days ago,I am really hurting bad. I don’t know what to do I feel so alone but I just want her bad like what can I do and I know the story is everywhere but it’s so hard to type this out. I don’t know if anyone wants to hear all of it, maybe I can make a discord or something but I don’t know what to do and I don’t want nobody else but her.

i have a 760 credit score. i was an authorized user for 3 years and opened my first unsecured credit card last september and the limit is about 8500 only because i don’t care to get it increased lol. I own a car i bought straight cash (2005 altima) and i do not pay rent. my dti % is shown as 8 percent. i make about 55k not including my business income and need about 45k personal loan over 60 months for a business investment. I most likely will have it paid off in less than 24 but to play it safe i chose 48. Would I need DD to help secure this loan or is my credit profile decent enough considering i only have 2 credit cards? 1 with authorized user and the other is my personal. i’m 22 so it would be hard for my credit profile to be but so big! thoughts ? comments ? thanks ! all advice will be appreciated no matter how harsh lol

Are lenders a little more lenient when it comes to taking over a car lease? I found someone that already put down $10,000 on the lease and wouldn’t require me to put down any additional money. I sadly have a score of 550 right now and I’m having a hard time locking in an auto loan with a lower down payment.
Could this be a hack or is there a better way around this issue? Asking for a friend.

Was in jail. Impound sold my car while in jail. Owed a good deal on it now I have a jury summons by the loan servicer to explain why I should or should not return possession of the vehicle to them. I don’t have it, because they sold it. Is that a reason? The case I was arrested for is being dismissed, but now I’m riding a bike in a suburban city and can’t get a job because the pending charges are being reported on my background check. No conviction, still disqualifies me from working at Target where I worked when I was 15; now I’m 30. What would you say on a jury to this? Or any other semblance of begging for some form of negotiation? It’s one of the least walkable cities I know of. It is as well due to me being on on the outskirts. Can’t pay $3 for bus fare either, because no job. Willing to work. Eagle Scout please help.

So I don’t know how to start this but I meet this girl on a dating app and we were talking, everything was amazing even the first time we met up. She spent the night over because she was too drunk to drive home so was I, I was very hesitant because this person at that time was a stranger but we just vibe so well. After that day we just keep hanging out and exploring places in SD. I got to really get to know this person so well and deeply that we had so much in common, Music, ideas, etc.
I started to like this girl so much but the only thing I didn’t like was she was talking to her ex still but for a reason. She had to pay him back for rent which I thought It was totally fine but it started to get to a point where she was like “ugh he is just pissing me off and I can’t take this with him.” Also she would bring up certain things with him to me which I thought was weird to me because even though I knew they lived with each other about two years ago and broke up a year ago.
I never seen somebody talk about their ex so much even though it was all bad things about him but even still have contact with him. I would kinda tease her about it sometimes like “oh sounds like you guys are still together.” She denies it and says fucker I like you not him anymore but it got to a point I would say stuff like that out of concern which one day, we had a conversation about it and she said I would bring him up all the time.
I never dealt with that before, so even though I know this is wrong I went on a the same dating app I found her on and was looking and I saw her sister friend at the time. I didn’t know the friend at the time so I swipe on her and we didn’t match but I get a call from the girl I was talking to and she was telling me how could I do this and everything else, which she is right I should of never done that. I just felt like she was so drawn on her ex and having conversations with him that I was going try and see what else was out there but after that we came to a agreement on just keep talking to each other.
Months go by and we fall for each other, we aren’t in a relationship yet because I just feel so doubtful that it could work because in my mind she is still talking to her ex. She wants to be my girlfriend but I just kept telling her let’s wait because of the ex stuff, I didn’t tell her that but she got it. We have each others location and spring break comes, I don’t know what happened but my location stops working for her.
I leave to go back home. She gets worried about not seeing it and wants to fix it and I tried to fix it but it wouldn’t work for me even showing her that it didn’t but then I told her I’m going to be spending time with my family because I never get to see them because I play college football. she got that but it’s also my fault because I spent so much time with them and didn’t text her as much when I was back at home.
My birthday is in spring break so I got gifts from my family but I got crocs that had I heart N which was from my mom which represented my uncle who passed, His name started with a N. she’s worried that I might have a another girl back home. I tried telling her I don’t but I wanted her to come over since I was gone for a week and she had gifts for my birthday that past so everything was good.
She is over my place and is fine with staying until I got back from practice so I left then I get text messages from my family friend telling me she is texting her on instagram and somehow gets her phone number. I couldn’t go back home to ask why she is doing that since I was already at practice but after practice I call her and she is literally back at her house and telling me that I lied to her and that she is done with me.
She literally took an edible and drove home which I think is crazy but she is so high and I tell her, What is going on and she says I have proof of you lying to me and I told her send it to me. She takes forever to send it but she sends it to me and it’s my crocs with the N. She tries to say my family friend is the girl so we go back and forth but then she realize that it wasn’t and says sorry for leaving and she also got in an argument with her mom.
I tell her that we need to just slow down we are just dating and you are doing crazy things. She agrees and we kinda slow down, after this she is still stalking my family friend. she doesn’t know that my family friend has a boyfriend and keeps looking at her stories and thinks it’s me so she jumps to conclusions and breaks up with me. I keep tryna tell her it’s not me and she keeps saying it is but we come to a agreement again and she asks me why do I still wanna date her when she’s done that, I tell her I just like her so much and wanna see how far it can go.
This is true and still is because this is still fresh. weeks later she is having conversations with her ex but she already told him that she wants me and not him anymore. he didn’t wanna let go and she was just paying him back the money she owed him but he started to make conversation with her and they were just talking like friends. Couple weeks ago he confessed to her about wanting her back and wants her to drop me and come back to him but they have a long bad history and she told him “I’m not doing that to him, I want him in my life not you just move on.”
He literally pass out or something while driving because he wasn’t getting sleep or something and she calls me and tells me everything that went on and all that shit made me so mad. she still was talking to him because I knew he would do something like that but he gives her a ultimatum of it’s either me or him. She told me that and tells him the next day I’m sticking with him. She couldn’t and wouldn’t go back to that place he put her in so after that I’m pissed off about that whole shit and keeping contact with him.
A week ago, my family friends car stops working so she asks me to take her to target to get stuff and I did because why wouldn’t I help. I do that and we are just laughing and talking then I take a picture of her with my crocs half way in it and she posted it but next thing that happens is I get a text from the girl. She says fuck you, bye then blocks me and it hurt so fucking much like I still think about it and tried to tell her, I wasn’t doing anything with my family friend but I was blocked.
I start to post on my story and she just watches them and not saying anything. I don’t say anything as well but then she posts something about karma is coming for the people that lied to her and did her wrong which hurt because I truly wasn’t doing nothing. I didn’t wanna text her because I was still shocked that she would do that then days go by and she stops watching it.
I saw she keep going public and private on instagram so when she opened it again I like some new pictures of her then she texts and delete. I asked her what did she say and she said why am I liking her shit and I need to stop because my little girlfriend isn’t going like that like just being so petty. She tells me that she is going block me on Instagram too so I started feeling sad and told her don’t let me just talk to her.
I wasn’t even home, I was literally in a different state for a family trip which was two days ago but I tell her everything that I love her and wanna fix it. I don’t wanna lose her but she tells me she isn’t changing her mind and I’m begging her because I truly love this girl but we come to somewhat an agreement of seeing each other Tuesday. I got back in the state so I text her and tell her my flight is going be late maybe let me stay over at her place because I know her mom a little and her mom likes me.
I told her maybe I could do that and we can just talk but then she tells me that’s not a good idea and she isn’t doing that so I keep trying and trying but she says we can talk on the phone when I land so I said fine I’m cool with that. I landed and I was about to text her that I landed, can we talk now but before I went on instagram to see if she unfollowed people because I just couldn’t stop thinking about her being with someone else. I see she blocked me on instagram so I go to text her phone number and I was blocked too.
I had a whole letter for her and she hasn’t even seen it because I sent it after the messages went green but it just hurts so much because I want this girl like she just matches me. This just happened two days ago,I am really hurting bad. I don’t know what to do I feel so alone but I just want her bad like what can I do and I know the story is everywhere but it’s so hard to type this out. I don’t know if anyone wants to hear all of it, maybe I can make a discord or something but I don’t know what to do and I don’t want nobody else but her.

So I don’t know how to start this but I meet this girl on a dating app and we were talking, everything was amazing even the first time we met up. She spent the night over because she was too drunk to drive home so was I, I was very hesitant because this person at that time was a stranger but we just vibe so well. After that day we just keep hanging out and exploring places in SD. I got to really get to know this person so well and deeply that we had so much in common, Music, ideas, etc.
I started to like this girl so much but the only thing I didn’t like was she was talking to her ex still but for a reason. She had to pay him back for rent which I thought It was totally fine but it started to get to a point where she was like “ugh he is just pissing me off and I can’t take this with him.” Also she would bring up certain things with him to me which I thought was weird to me because even though I knew they lived with each other about two years ago and broke up a year ago.
I never seen somebody talk about their ex so much even though it was all bad things about him but even still have contact with him. I would kinda tease her about it sometimes like “oh sounds like you guys are still together.” She denies it and says fucker I like you not him anymore but it got to a point I would say stuff like that out of concern which one day, we had a conversation about it and she said I would bring him up all the time.
I never dealt with that before, so even though I know this is wrong I went on a the same dating app I found her on and was looking and I saw her sister friend at the time. I didn’t know the friend at the time so I swipe on her and we didn’t match but I get a call from the girl I was talking to and she was telling me how could I do this and everything else, which she is right I should of never done that. I just felt like she was so drawn on her ex and having conversations with him that I was going try and see what else was out there but after that we came to a agreement on just keep talking to each other.
Months go by and we fall for each other, we aren’t in a relationship yet because I just feel so doubtful that it could work because in my mind she is still talking to her ex. She wants to be my girlfriend but I just kept telling her let’s wait because of the ex stuff, I didn’t tell her that but she got it. We have each others location and spring break comes, I don’t know what happened but my location stops working for her.
I leave to go back home. She gets worried about not seeing it and wants to fix it and I tried to fix it but it wouldn’t work for me even showing her that it didn’t but then I told her I’m going to be spending time with my family because I never get to see them because I play college football. she got that but it’s also my fault because I spent so much time with them and didn’t text her as much when I was back at home.
My birthday is in spring break so I got gifts from my family but I got crocs that had I heart N which was from my mom which represented my uncle who passed, His name started with a N. she’s worried that I might have a another girl back home. I tried telling her I don’t but I wanted her to come over since I was gone for a week and she had gifts for my birthday that past so everything was good.
She is over my place and is fine with staying until I got back from practice so I left then I get text messages from my family friend telling me she is texting her on instagram and somehow gets her phone number. I couldn’t go back home to ask why she is doing that since I was already at practice but after practice I call her and she is literally back at her house and telling me that I lied to her and that she is done with me.
She literally took an edible and drove home which I think is crazy but she is so high and I tell her, What is going on and she says I have proof of you lying to me and I told her send it to me. She takes forever to send it but she sends it to me and it’s my crocs with the N. She tries to say my family friend is the girl so we go back and forth but then she realize that it wasn’t and says sorry for leaving and she also got in an argument with her mom.
I tell her that we need to just slow down we are just dating and you are doing crazy things. She agrees and we kinda slow down, after this she is still stalking my family friend. she doesn’t know that my family friend has a boyfriend and keeps looking at her stories and thinks it’s me so she jumps to conclusions and breaks up with me. I keep tryna tell her it’s not me and she keeps saying it is but we come to a agreement again and she asks me why do I still wanna date her when she’s done that, I tell her I just like her so much and wanna see how far it can go.
This is true and still is because this is still fresh. weeks later she is having conversations with her ex but she already told him that she wants me and not him anymore. he didn’t wanna let go and she was just paying him back the money she owed him but he started to make conversation with her and they were just talking like friends. Couple weeks ago he confessed to her about wanting her back and wants her to drop me and come back to him but they have a long bad history and she told him “I’m not doing that to him, I want him in my life not you just move on.”
He literally pass out or something while driving because he wasn’t getting sleep or something and she calls me and tells me everything that went on and all that shit made me so mad. she still was talking to him because I knew he would do something like that but he gives her a ultimatum of it’s either me or him. She told me that and tells him the next day I’m sticking with him. She couldn’t and wouldn’t go back to that place he put her in so after that I’m pissed off about that whole shit and keeping contact with him.
A week ago, my family friends car stops working so she asks me to take her to target to get stuff and I did because why wouldn’t I help. I do that and we are just laughing and talking then I take a picture of her with my crocs half way in it and she posted it but next thing that happens is I get a text from the girl. She says fuck you, bye then blocks me and it hurt so fucking much like I still think about it and tried to tell her, I wasn’t doing anything with my family friend but I was blocked.
I start to post on my story and she just watches them and not saying anything. I don’t say anything as well but then she posts something about karma is coming for the people that lied to her and did her wrong which hurt because I truly wasn’t doing nothing. I didn’t wanna text her because I was still shocked that she would do that then days go by and she stops watching it.
I saw she keep going public and private on instagram so when she opened it again I like some new pictures of her then she texts and delete. I asked her what did she say and she said why am I liking her shit and I need to stop because my little girlfriend isn’t going like that like just being so petty. She tells me that she is going block me on Instagram too so I started feeling sad and told her don’t let me just talk to her.
I wasn’t even home, I was literally in a different state for a family trip which was two days ago but I tell her everything that I love her and wanna fix it. I don’t wanna lose her but she tells me she isn’t changing her mind and I’m begging her because I truly love this girl but we come to somewhat an agreement of seeing each other Tuesday. I got back in the state so I text her and tell her my flight is going be late maybe let me stay over at her place because I know her mom a little and her mom likes me.
I told her maybe I could do that and we can just talk but then she tells me that’s not a good idea and she isn’t doing that so I keep trying and trying but she says we can talk on the phone when I land so I said fine I’m cool with that. I landed and I was about to text her that I landed, can we talk now but before I went on instagram to see if she unfollowed people because I just couldn’t stop thinking about her being with someone else. I see she blocked me on instagram so I go to text her phone number and I was blocked too.
I had a whole letter for her and she hasn’t even seen it because I sent it after the messages went green but it just hurts so much because I want this girl like she just matches me. This just happened two days ago,I am really hurting bad. I don’t know what to do I feel so alone but I just want her bad like what can I do and I know the story is everywhere but it’s so hard to type this out. I don’t know if anyone wants to hear all of it, maybe I can make a discord or something but I don’t know what to do and I don’t want nobody else but her.

I'm 23, I have a credit score of 740 and I'm looking to get a new car. I currently have a 2011 ford Taurus and would like to trade it in. I plan on applying for an auto loan through a credit union and trading in my car. This all seems very daunting and I would appreciate any tips or help. I'm looking to get either a Toyota Corolla or a Honda Civic. I would like a newer one, 2022 or newer. I'm concerned with monthly payments and the cost of insurance being a lot.

I'm 20, and lucky enough to live with parents who still pay for my necessities and then some. I'm working a part time job, and will be going to a university in August. I graduated from community college a semester early, so I'll have to pay student loans until I'm back in school.
(June 1st) Savings: $947.05
Earnings: $884.74 on June 14th $628.47 on June 28th $658.98 on July 12th $518.64 on July 26th $658.98 on August 9th —————— $3,349.81
Spending: • $100 for gas ($300) • $50 for karate ($150) • $50 for fun ($150) • $50 for cushion ($150) • $300 for karate testing • $50 for Father's Day • $50 for best friend's birthday —————————— $250 ($1,150)
Student loans (2x min, rounded up) • $89 to 4k Unsub ($44.26 min) ($267) • $67 to 3.5k Sub ($37.26 min) ($201) • $45 to 2k Unsub ($22.13 min) ($135) —————————— $201 ($603)
$3,349.81 - $1,753 = $1,596.81
(August 9th) Savings: ~$2,543.86
My goal is to get a better car before leaving, as mine is 30 years old and I'll be going far. I'm looking at $10k max, I know that 2.5k for a down-payment and fees will be cutting it really close, but I will most likely have extra I can pull from my checking. (Also, I'll have another paycheck from my current job after I arrive on campus, and I already have a job lined up over there, so don't worry about me being completely broke.)

So I'll try to give some background on the situation. I'm currently in a debt relief program due to some hardship and bad decisions. I had a car I was paying 1k a month,but needed a bigger car for my family. Since I'm in debt relief I couldn't get a new loan,so my mom helped put it on her credit. Monthly is same price, so no issues there.
So my car is off my name and new car is under my mom. I'm an adult and don't not live with her.
I didn't think this was an issue as we told the dealer,but they said it's fine. But others have told me I may be in trouble. Any insights?

My step daughter is 7 years old. Her mother and I work quite often, I own a business that takes me away from home anywhere from 8am to 10pm and her mother works from 4 to 9 (which is about the time she gets out of school) so she spends a majority of time at her grandparents.
The problem is, she's never disciplined over there at all, her biological father has only seen her twice, once when she was born and the second time on her 1st birthday; other than that I've raised her since she was 2. I completely blame the grandmother for the childs lack of respect for people. She says blatantly racist things, cusses, throws tantrums, cries until she gets her way, treats my other children horribly, as well as her own mother and I.
My biological daughter is an absolute sweetheart and when she comes over all she wants to do is go play with her little sister (they are 1 year apart), she constantly ask if she's gonna see her but anytime my step daughter comes over she bullies my daughter and treats her like crap. Calling her names and saying she doesn't like her. I fear that my daughter will begin to mimick this behavior and honestly, she's an angel (no exaggeration, I've never heard anyone complain about her, she's well mannered, polite, loving, and respectful. A polar opposite of her step-sibling).
The maternal grandfather works just as much as I do, but the grandmother stays at home and drinks pretty heavily. Talking bad about people (even about her own daughter in front of the child). When my step daughter is here, no lie, she literally sounds like her grandmother, mimicking her behavior and mannerisms. Honestly, there's nothing I can do. I'm in no position to discipline her because she's not my child and when I leave it up to her mother she completely agrees with me but nothing is ever done because she only gets to see her daughter so much and doesn't want to be the bad guy.
I just don't know what to do anymore, of course I tell her things like (don't talk to your mother that way, you only get one), (stop cussing, that's not very lady like), (cross your legs), (put some clothes on), (don't burp/fart at the table, go excuse yourself), (cover your mouth when you cough), (don't hit your brother), (don't say that its rude), (you shouldn't point at people), (that wasn't very nice, you need to apologize). The same way I speak to my other children but she just tells me to shut up or continues to do it anyway. The things this 7 year old says just completely baffles me and now our child that we have together, our 4 year old son, is beginning to act the same way and I won't have that. I have 3 older children that are all well behaved and it's because I made sure they were raised to be respectful and empathetic. This child just doesn't get it and I really don't want my youngest or even my daughter thinking that her behavior is acceptable or tolerated. I won't condone it or give that type of behavior a safe haven.
Something has to be done but I'm lost on what to do. Everything I've read on this topic has to deal with older children in their teens, she's only 7 and I feel like she doesn't understand what she's saying or the hurtful impact it has on other people. She's literally in the other room telling my 4 year old he's going to get an "ass whooping" and I've already told her multiple times to stop talking like that.
It's like my lady just gave up on trying to correct her and when it comes to my youngest child, her entire family encourages his bad behavior because they find it amusing not understanding the repercussions it will have later in his life.
My step daughter also eats a ridiculous amount of food, she's twice the size of a child her age, her mom even has her wearing sports bras, and she constantly plays roblox and is always role playing on there talking about things no 7 year old should talk about. "Boyfriends, Girlfriends, being gay, having sex, being retarded, being colored, cussing", she literally acts like an undisciplined spoiled 16 year old girl.
Now mind you, she hangs around a lot with her older cousins who live a couple houses down (my ladies entire family lives within a 3 minute walk), they're between the ages of 13 and 16, (3 girls) and she acts just like them. I've tried explaining to her that she shouldn't be talking about those things or even thinking about them at her age, she clearly ignores me though and anytime I try to put my foot down her mother just shrugs it off like it's no big deal.
I feel like giving up, honestly, at this point her behavior is accepted by everyone and there's no way I can punish her without negative reactions from her family. She runs back and tells her grandparents everything.
Like I said, my son is beginning to do the same thing and what's worse is my lady doesn't see it. Now, my youngest son was a little slower on learning to communicate with words but now that he talks he says things like (shut up, die shit, and bitch) and her family thinks it's hilarious. It's disgusting to watch because I was in no way raised like that, I'd be eating soap. He flips people off, hits them, screams, throws tantrums. It's like what the f*** do I do at this point. When I discipline him, my lady protects his every action. Saying he doesn't understand. Anytime I say something, she rebuttals telling me what his behavior is going to be and he acts it out instantly. Say for instance, when we are alone, he's very well behaved, he doesn't act all crazy running around babbling, he listens when I talk. But the second his mom is there his personality changes and he turns into Donny from the "Wild Thornberries". Example: If we're alone I encourage him to eat his food by pretending to take something off his plate and eat it, he protects his food and begins to eat. If mom is around and I do it, she says something like "you're gonna make him scream and throw a fit, why are you irritating him?" And almost instantly he begins to do exactly what she said. He listens to his mother and waits for her response and then acts it out. He literally stares at her until she says what he's going to do then he does it. I watch it constantly and when I point it out she says "I just know how he's going to respond". Like it's a permanent behavior.
Then there's things my lady says that really irks me, like asking our child who he loves more, mommy or daddy and if he says me, my lady makes a crying sound and he goes "mommy, mommy". She's slowly programming and conditioning him to not acknowledge or respect me and to choose favorites.
I will summarize quickly my ladies relationship to our children. Her biological daughter (from a previous relationship) has spent a majority of her childhood being raised by her grandmother so our son (4) which we have together, is the first child she has raised continously (noted: she definitely didn't read the baby books) and the way she parents is so off the charts I can't even begin to explain it all. She spoils him like an only child, treats my other biological children (17, 13, & 8 years old) as alien and indifferent, she's very jealous of their presence and my strong relationship to them, she gets mad when I do things for them, buying them things they need/ want, or I put them first (emotionally and financially). For instance my oldest turns 18 soon and I'm buying him a car, she's upset that I'm doing that for him and not buying her one, she has already taken me for child support even though we live together and I pay for everything in the house already. We have an agreement she pays gas, electric, water, and trash I pay the mortgage and everything else. (Roughly 8-10k a month).
I do make 300k+ a year and she might only bring home 20k, but I've worked really hard to get us to where we are from where we've been.
Enough rambling, my concern right now is the behavior of my step daughter and what actions I need to take to get her to start behaving like a well respected and empathetic human being and prevent my youngest son from growing up thinking the way his older sister acts is normal. I'm at a loss. I can't punish her because 1.) Physical punishment is unethical and frowned upon, 2.) Timeouts aren't heeded or respected, 3.) I can't take away her devices because she just leaves and walks down to her grandmother's house, 4.) I was told it isn't my responsibility, 5.) She's not my biological child.
Anything I do say is completely ignored and she goes right back to doing the same off the wall thing. Saying blatantly disrespectful things like "black people are disgusting", "You're stupid and lazy", "you're retarded", "I don't care", "you're not my dad", "why don't you just leave, this isn't your house", "my mom doesn't even like you", "you're not the boss of me", "I'm going to tell my grandma", "I don't even like you", "you don't even care about your son", "why are you here", "my mom loves my brother more than me", "I hope you die", "That girl is ugly", "that guy is a fatass", "why do they look like that", "you're annoying / you're stupid / you're ugly / you're dumb", "nobody cares".
These things were ingrained into my mind from a young age to be inappropriate and disrespectful and I've passed this empathetic understanding onto my other children. She just doesn't seem to get it and doesn't respect me at all even though I've treated her like my own daughter for a majority of her life. She even calls me dad. The only thing I haven't done is physically punished her but my God, some days I want to put her through a wall. Especially when she disrespects her mother or me.
Now before anyone goes on about how she doesn't get attention or she's seeking it, this child is spoiled. Not only by her mother but her grandparents also. They buy her whatever she wants, she's goes to so many different events, theme parks, movies, the store. Always has to get something. Her birthdays are massive, she gets hundreds of presents and she's always accompanied by someone who gives their undivided attention. It's not a lack of attention that is the cause of her ill behavior. If anything it's her grandmother's drinking and talking disrespectfully about other people in front of her that she picks up and is reiterated.
I've explained to my lady that her mother is a horrible influence on the child's young, susceptible, and maleable mind. That her behavior is mimicked, learned, and then projected onto others all while being condoned by people with an authoritive position to inact necessary discipline.
To counteract this and on a positive note, it's summer... school is out and the child will be spending less time over there, especially on nights she's been drinking. But the true question is this, is the learned behavior reversible after being accepted for so long? and what can I do (as a step father), to direct and coerce her perception to not only become more analytical but create a thought process that is more empathetic and understanding?
I'm sure there is not a one size fits all answer but if you have the time and the patience to share your opinions, I'm all ears.
Thanks, (Concerned Step-Father)

35 married with 4 kids. Income is currently about 18k/mo combined (both self employed). Monthly spend is 12k average.
Budget is 6k housing. 2k childcare. 1.5k groceries/toiletries. 200 auto. 200 home repair sinking fund. 600 medical. 2k to Roth IRA/529s. 1500 guilt free spending/miscellaneous. 3k taxes. 1k student loan payments.
60k in savings. 80k in Roth IRAs. 0 in taxable. 3 houses: 600k w 200k mortgage, 2500 rent - 1500 expenses including mortgage. 450k w 280k mortgage, 2200 rent - 1500 expenses including mortgage. Primary is 1.2M w 900k mortgage, 6k mortgage inclusive of utilities. 570k in student loans with no serious plan to pay it off. No consumer debt. Cars paid off but getting old and needing expensive repairs. 16k in 529s, 200/mo total contributions split four ways.
The thought is that by the time we retire, the three houses will be paid off and the rental income plus social security will easily cover living expenses with no mortgage. The Roth IRA will go to lifestyle spending. As expenses like mortgages and childcare fall off, we would put those funds into retirement or taxable accounts, but four kids means we are often limited to 60-70 hours a week of work. If the tax situation does not change for student loans, I will use some of the Roth or taxable funds to pay off the student loans or taxes for student loan forgiveness.
My spouse thinks we should spend more (travel, summer camps, skiing, etc.) instead of saving and reaching for higher income (we do hourly work), since the real estate should cover all of our expenses in retirement. Are we in as precarious a position as it feels? We are not trying for anything crazy like retiring early or leaving an inheritance. In fact, we both expect to work until our health prohibits it.
I feel like one of those city horses with blinders on, like there is something I'm not seeing.

I am not the OOP. The OOP is u/ElectronicMoon1676 posting in AskALawyer
Likely Concluded as per OOP
2 updates - Medium
Original - 13th May 2024
Update1 - 15th May 2024
Update2 - 23rd May 2024
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Mother wants to legally force me to live with her even though I am 39.
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So my mother (60) has always had a flair for dramatics and will convince herself of things that are just not true, and of course her brothers (my uncles) think it’s hilarious and will get her worked up even more, while making fun of her for being so gullible behind her back. I cut her out of my life 4 years ago. We are in Michigan. Someone I trust in the family came to me with concerns that my mother may lie to try to get conservatorship over me.
Here is what I know. Her current belief is that I am an unemployed alcoholic living in my car and being taken advantage of by evil men from the political party that she hates. This is not true. I have a place, pay my bills and had a full-time job last time we spoke. I did leave that job but I also returned to school full time on GI Bill, which includes a stipend for living expenses, and found a sweet part-time job, in an air conditioned office, on campus. As far as I know she has no idea I am back in school and I haven’t told anyone in my family, even the ones I trust, what is going on in my life.
Problem is that she lost her job of over 20 years during a mass lay off sometime since we last spoke. These new coworkers haven’t known her long enough to recognize how she doesn’t keep her stories straight or how she flip-flops things around. Basically she has led everyone she works with to believe I am only in my early-mid 20’s and haven’t quite finished my “teenage rebellion phase”, and she is a good mommy who just wants to save her baby from the evil political party.
They have all been “helping her with “research””, and believe because I have a disability rating from the VA, it means I am mentally incompetent. It does not at all mean that. Now I am positive that none of them actually understand how a VA disability rating actually works, my mother likely lied to them about it. Her new friends believe she can have me declared incompetent, force me to live with her for monitoring, and finally take control of my finances thus getting control of my disability payments. I have an 80 rating which is currently just under $2000 a month.
My concern isn’t that my mother could prove I am incompetent but it’s that she could use court proceedings to get a hold of my address, school, or work place. I guess my question is about rules of discovery when it comes to conservatorship cases. Can my mother or any lawyer willing to take her case on actually get ahold of my personal info I don’t want her to have?
If I provide courts with documents proving my competence and ability to care for myself, do I have the right to ask the court to seal or redact any information or documents with info I don’t want her getting? She sabotaged me going to college around 20 years ago and I don’t want to go through that again. I am assuming that the first person I would ever have to deal with would be a social worker, and I want to know if I have any legal recourse to prevent the social worker from sharing my info with my mother?
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Comments
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530_Oldschoolgeek
See if your college has some kind of free legal aid service they can direct you to, and explain this to them. They might be able to point you in the direction to get low cost or free legal services so an attorney can send your mother a cease and desist letter along with filing for a restraining order in such a manner as to not disclose your current whereabouts.
They might also have other ideas that will curtail any attempt by her to try to put a conservatorship in place.

OOP: I just checked and they don’t. But, silly me forgot, the VA clinic in my city has a social worker on site. I used her once for a medical power of attorney. But I bet she could either help me herself or get me to the right resource.

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Stunning-Interest15
Not a lawyer, but they pay me a shit ton of money to handle stuff like this as a private investigator. Here's my take.
Yes. Her lawyer will hire an investigator to find all of your information. They will pay online databrokers for your file and they will get WAY more than your address. (Everything. They will get everything. If you fucked up and said that thought you didn't want people knowing about, they will find that out.)
Any of that information that can then be found on Google is a public record since it's already on the public Internet. Your address is almost certainly among that data.
No court can sanction public information. Even if they could, the internet is forever and it's already out there.
So, bad news there. The good news is that you're a grown ass woman and the courts are not going to give her a conservatorship just because you have PTSD. You are in no danger of anything other than your mom showing up on your doorstep unannounced.

OOP: How likely are lawyers and private investigators to take on someone without the ability to pay. Do they have the ability to check credit scores. My mother is terrible with money. My brother confessed to me that she “sold the house” she bought with her third husband a little while after their divorce. By brother insinuated that she was in a bad way with money. I know that when I was 20 and she was 40, I had a better credit score than her. I went to buy a used car and she said she would have to co-sign cuz I was too young to have a good credit score. Turned out I got a better rate without her co-signing. Makes me wonder how bad someone’s credit has to be that you are detrimental to a loan as a co-signer.

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Update - 2 days later
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I tried to update the original post and couldn’t, and the update comment I left got buried at the bottom.
Backstory: Mother wanted me declared incompetent to gain control of me and my veteran disability payments.
So I talked with another family member who confirmed what the first said. Everyone is angry because I wasn’t suppose to find out what happened because “they were handling it”. I refused to tell who told me, which is causing more anger but whatever. So this situation had resolved itself last week. My mother was talking a big game about how she was calling lawyers and Adult Protective Services. After a few days she started trashing on all lawyers and saying that APS was wasting taxpayer dollars.
Apparently she has forgotten all about this whole mess. Her job got a new summer internet and my mother is obsessed. Every conversation anyone has with her is about this guy. My poor grandma has to have no less than a one hour conversation with my mother everyday about this guy. The guy comes from a lot of money, which in the end was what I think she wanted with me. This guy just turned 20 and my mother is 60.
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Comments
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homer_lives
That sounds like a win for now. Most likely, APS "laughed" her out of the room. I would avoid contact since she sounds Manic, going from one scheme or idea to another.
shhh_its_me
Sounds like Mom needs a guardian
DredgenCyka
If I had a nickel for everytime I heard of someone's mom trying to force their 100% VA disabled veteran son or daughter to live with them by declaring them incompetent for self care, I'd have about 25 to 30 cents. It's just weird that it's happened that many times, and it's sad. Stay away from her, and thank you for your service!
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Update - 8 days later
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TLDR of my previous post was that my mother wanted to have me declared incompetent so she could get control of my veteran disability payments and force me to come live with her. I went no contact like 4 years ago. Her plan was to make up wild stories about me and it didn’t go her way. Now she is obsessed with this new intern at her job that comes from money, and seems to have forgotten all about her plan.
I was able to squeeze in meeting with the social worker who works at my VA clinic. I gave her the run down and even showed her my two previous posts. She thought it was kinda funny. She informed me that if a state SW were to be informed of a veteran in a need they would reach out to the VA and she would likely be a first point of contact.
She said that no one from the county or state has contacted her about me yet, but she would make a note. Apparently, the whole Britney Spears conservatorship has made a lot of people think it’s super easy to get conservatorships. She said some people think they will get paid a lot of money to do it. Her best guess is that if my mother did call, it was explained to her how complex the process is and that I would be guided to the VA to receive treatment first, before declaring me incompetent. She did agree with many of the comments that said my mother could find me pretty easily if she really wanted to.
The SW use to work at the state office and while she didn’t work at adult protective services but she had friends and coworkers who did. Money seemed to her to be a really big factor in how hard people fought to get conservatorship. She was surprisingly compassionate towards my mother and said sometimes parents just get worried and worry makes people do stupid things. She said some parents have a hard time adjusting to their children becoming adults and moving out.
Sometimes it’s because they are losing child support, or they’re losing the person who did all the chores, or because they just don’t want to face reality that their baby grew up. And these parents will lash out at the world instead of accepting the truth. She told me about a case a friend of hers had where the parents of an adult woman who had moved out couldn’t face reality. Her parents had been relying on her to do all the housework and raise her brothers. With her gone, everything fell apart at home.
These parents blamed their daughter who had moved out instead of taking responsibility for their own lives Her friend was so stressed by the case because she got yelled at by the parents almost daily about how the state needed to force their daughter to move back in with them. They never got their wish and almost lost their other kids. A grandparent found out what was happening and stepped up to set the parents straight.
Someone had messaged me saying my post was blowing up on social media and I went looking for it and couldn’t find it. They pointed out my family could see it, but I’ve decided I don’t care if they do.
So basically, if my mother really wants to find me she can, but the conservatorship isn’t that easy to get, and I know my mother well enough to know she doesn’t have the patience, or money needed to pursue this anymore. Also there seems to be a lot of rules surrounding conservatorship that I don’t think my mother would have liked following. So I should be good for a while.
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Comments
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OOP in response to a deleted comment (presumably about the intern)

A far as I know he still works there and she is still obsessed.

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DredgenCyka
You should still remain in No Contact with your mom. This will still make it difficult to gain conservatorship over you. I also don't think the VA hospital will pronounce you incompetent at all unless you lost limbs or went into a vegetative state from a concussive blast, in addition 100% Disabled ≠ Incompetent to manage youre own life. Hopefully, the VA will become an advocacy group for you, im also pretty sure the VA offers lawyers to their veterans. You can ask about that if your mom steps out of line.
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I am not the OOP. Please do not harass the OOP.
Please remember the No Brigading Rule and to be civil in the comments

Single male with no dependents. Don’t spend more than $500 in a month usually other than rent, car payment, and student loans, so that makes me lean towards Custom cash.
Your recommendations?

Kind of a late post, I officially FIRE'd last September, guess I just wanted to make sure it stuck. Before making my post about it. I'm hoping to make yearly updates, just to track the post FIRE journey. I'm also on mobile, so forgive the errors, or roast me for them, I'll take either.
Anyway, onto my journey and numbers. Numbers are at the bottom if you don't care about my boring life story. I know all we really care about here is seeing the stats, at least that's what I like.
I enlisted in the Air Force at 18 with $500 in my bank account and did almost 12 years active duty. I know the military isn't for everyone, but I had a blast. Learned a few foreign languages, got to fly on multiple aircraft (MC-12, RC- 135, and and the AC-130 gunship),and finished my last couple years as a paralegal.
My initial plan was to retire at 20 years, but during my time AD, I purchased several multi family homes, invested in the stock market,and remained frugal. By the time I separated I had a primary home, a 4 plex, a triplex, three duplexes, and a SFH I bought for my brother. I ended up with 60% disability, but that recently got bumped up to 90%.
Once I got out of the Air Force, I got a defense contractor job as a pred drone imagery analyst...the pay sucked and the hours were long, but I missed being part of the war effort like I was in my aircrew days. That lasted 11 months.
Then I got picked up for a much higher paying job, deploying as aircrew to different warzones. Made about 200k a year for the next 3 years for 6 months of work a year. My plan was to keep doing the job until the contract got cancelled, but defense contractor life is full of layoffs. My layoff in September triggered my decision to FIRE. I also downsized my rentals by selling the triplex and two duplexes, might sell the third duplex this year or next.
Not sure what my future goals are, I do need to use my GI Bill for college at some point and I would like to start traveling some more.
Now for the part that matters, the money I decided I could FIRE with.
Investments:
-200k in retirement accounts
-700k taxable brokerage account
-100k in USFR (mostly to cover my cash secured puts)
-25k in HYSA
Total: $1,025,000
Monthly Income:
-VA: $2500
-Rentals: $5000
-Short term rental: $3000 average
-Seller financed property: $1100
Total: $10600
Monthly expenditures:
This is one I'd like to start tracking better, I've never been a fan of spreadsheets. I'm just going to list the numbers that don't really change much.
-Mortgage payments (combined): $3000

• Utilities: $500
  
• Car payment: $800
  
• Insurance: $200
  
• groceries: $350 average
  
• misc: $500 roughly
  

Total: $5350
Debt and real estate info:
Car: 31k remaining at 4.75% (will pay off when HYSA rates drop below that)
Primary home: 134k at 2.99% -Purchased in 2018 for 180k, estimated value 320k based on comps
Fourplex: 187k at 2.85% -Purchased in 2014 for 350k, estimated value 850k based on comps
Duplex: paid off -Purchased in 2016 for 89k cash, estimated value 225k based on recent offers
Sold properties:
Triplex: I sold as seller financing -purchased in 2020 for 106k purchase price, sold 195k at 5% for 7 year term 168k balloon payment at end
Two duplexes: purchased as a pair in 2015 for 190k sold for 450k
I think I covered everything. I'm considering downsizing by selling my primary home and moving into my four plex. That would take away my short term rental income.
Thanks to anyone who read this, I know it's just a dumb humblebrag post, but I don't see many stories on here from people who grew up poor and retired early. I spent a lot of time during my last few years in the military teaching younger military members the value of the VA loan and multifamily investing, would love to get back into that.

About a week ago, my wife got into a car accident. Someone pulled out in front of her & they hit each other. Things are still being worked out for insurance, but our car is looking to be a total loss.
In the meantime, our insurance got us a loaner car for about a month. Originally, my wife was going to drive the car as it was her car that was totaled.
However, upon driving to the rental office, she realized she did not have her license on her. While we had accurate pictures of her license, the agent said that they would not accept the pictures & that she needed to display her license to them in person. The agent made it very clear that she is not to drive the car until she’s on the rental agreement.
When we got home, she immediately wanted to take the car around the block for a test drive. I told her that I was not comfortable with that at all & I didn’t want her driving it until we found her license. She protested, but I offered to help her look for it. We spent all afternoon looking for it, but could not find it.
Now we’re looking at getting a replacement sent, but the DMVs current processing time is about 3 weeks, which is nearly the entire time we have the car. She’s frustrated because she was looking forward to having a “nice” car to drive, but is stuck driving mine.
For reference, her car that was wrecked was a 2019 Outlander. The Loaner is a 2024 Yukon. And my car is a 2007 Camry.
She accused me of wanting the nice car to drive for the next month while she’s stuck driving my car around. I told her I want nothing more than for her to have the Loaner (especially because I commute 60 miles every day) but since she’s not officially on the agreement, I don’t want her risking anything.
Also, she used to never carry her license around. Any time she got pulled over, she gave them her license number & the police officers had no issue with it, which is what she intends to do here if she does get pulled over.

Hi, I have a quick question and your answers will be really helpful to me. I have a car loan of 15L for 7 years at 8.9 interest rate from SBI. The monthly EMI is 25k. I have been paying 25k emi + 25k pre pay since the first month. Now when i check the statement...it says 25k principal repayment, 16,032 principal repayment and 8,968 interest repayment. This has been same for every month, my question is, shouldn't the amount 8,698 reduce as I have been paying more and my principal is reducing...so the interest on it should also reduce?

Looking for advice or any insight.
I’m $45k in credit card debt. Plan to meet with a lawyer and talk about filing for chapter 7 bankruptcy as soon as I can. I’ve been unemployed since January and just doordashing since while I apply to literally every job on indeed everyday. So my car is pretty vital to me at the moment. The thing is I have my car loan through my credit union which I also have a credit card at that I’m going to stop paying on when it comes to meeting with a lawyer.
I’ve read about credit unions completely cutting ties after BK. I have already changed my checking account over but my car loan is still there. I’ve only had it for a little over a year but I’ve never missed a payment and I have about $2k in equity on it. I would reaffirm if it comes down to that but I fear the credit union won’t even agree to that they’ll just close my account and repo. Should I try to refinance it somewhere else that is more likely to let me keep it after BK? I know I’m going to take a hit on the interest rate but I’m desperate to keep the car.