Hi0p hop exsample for alliteration
University of Victoria
2010.06.13 20:45 joelfriesen University of Victoria
The University of Victoria is a major research university located in Victoria, British Columbia, Canada. The university traces its roots to Victoria College, the first post-secondary institution established in British Columbia in 1903, it was then reorganized in 1963 into its present form. The University of Victoria is a non-denominational multi-disciplinary institution.
2019.04.30 21:51 FeatsOverComments Chinesecuisine
Sub on Chinese food and cuisine. Mostly videos on how to cook it.
2011.10.23 21:34 mmm_burrito Wings & Teeth
This subreddit is home for fans of the Minneapolis hip-hop collective Doomtree, and the individual members: Cecil Otter, Dessa, Lazer Beak, Mike Mictlan, P.O.S, Paper Tiger, and Sims.
2024.05.31 01:45 ConsecutivePunches What makes Hip-Hop music, Hip-Hop? What is a rapper really?
Earlier, I was watching Akademik's stream where he was discussing the Mob Ties reference leak. During the stream, he called fans who believe that rappers write their own lyrics naive and that he was also naive once. I clipped the 3 minute section where he discussed this and i'll insert it in this post.
https://reddit.com/link/1d4hvj8/video/2x2vp9rign3d1/player
The way I see it, this is textbook coping. Drake wants to be a high echelon rapper so bad. But what parameters does it take to become a top-tier rapper within the Hip-Hop community/Culture? What differs Hip-Hop from literally every other music genre?
I decided to ask Chat-GPT to see if even A.I could understand Hip-Hop culture as an experiment. The question I prompted was "What makes Hip-Hop, Hip-Hop, do rappers write their own lyrics?" and this was the result,
Authenticity and Personal Expression
Personal Storytelling: Writing their own lyrics allows rappers to tell their unique stories, experiences, and perspectives, which is a fundamental aspect of hip-hop culture.
Authenticity: Authenticity is highly valued in hip-hop. Fans and peers often respect rappers more if they write their own lyrics, as it demonstrates genuine expression and creativity.
Techniques and Craft
Skill and Technique: Crafting lyrics involves various techniques such as metaphor, simile, alliteration, assonance, and complex rhyme schemes. Writing their own lyrics showcases a rapper's skill and mastery of these techniques.
Wordplay and Lyrical Dexterity: Many rappers are known for their clever wordplay, puns, and intricate lyrical structures, which are best displayed through their original writing.
submitted by ConsecutivePunches to rap [link] [comments]
https://reddit.com/link/1d4hvj8/video/2x2vp9rign3d1/player
The way I see it, this is textbook coping. Drake wants to be a high echelon rapper so bad. But what parameters does it take to become a top-tier rapper within the Hip-Hop community/Culture? What differs Hip-Hop from literally every other music genre?
I decided to ask Chat-GPT to see if even A.I could understand Hip-Hop culture as an experiment. The question I prompted was "What makes Hip-Hop, Hip-Hop, do rappers write their own lyrics?" and this was the result,
ChatGPT:Yes, many rappers write their own lyrics, and this aspect is often considered a critical part of their artistry and credibility in the hip-hop community. Writing one's own lyrics allows rappers to express their personal experiences, thoughts, and emotions authentically. Here are some key points about rappers and their lyric writing:
Authenticity and Personal Expression
Personal Storytelling: Writing their own lyrics allows rappers to tell their unique stories, experiences, and perspectives, which is a fundamental aspect of hip-hop culture.
Authenticity: Authenticity is highly valued in hip-hop. Fans and peers often respect rappers more if they write their own lyrics, as it demonstrates genuine expression and creativity.
Techniques and Craft
Skill and Technique: Crafting lyrics involves various techniques such as metaphor, simile, alliteration, assonance, and complex rhyme schemes. Writing their own lyrics showcases a rapper's skill and mastery of these techniques.
Wordplay and Lyrical Dexterity: Many rappers are known for their clever wordplay, puns, and intricate lyrical structures, which are best displayed through their original writing.
2024.05.22 05:23 x100139 Crossout Fan-Fiction The Ravaging, Chapter 3: How to Lose a Rig in 30 Seconds
Click this link to read Chapter 2
Chapter 3: How to Lose a Rig in 30 Seconds
“God damnit!” the salty old man ripped his headset from his balding head and he tossed it aside the radio.
“I’m on fire!” squelched a voice through the earpiece. “Oh my God I’m on fire!” he screamed, and the sounds of the garbled scream cut off into static decay.
“Bunch of idiots…” he shook his head. “Can’t listen worth a hill of beans!” He sat back with a deep sigh as he wiped the look of mild annoyance and defeat from his face. He just shook his head as he reached to press a green button on the radio, it switched to an open channel as he held it in place and picked up his headset to grumble into the microphone, “ObsidianFang to all outposts, the convoy is toast…I repeat, the convoy is toast.” He depressed the button and, again, tossed the headset down aside the radio as he stood from behind the counter in his shop. He looked up from his things to see outside as a man, long-haired and disheveled walked by and started shimmying up onto the roof. “What in the world?” Just out of Fang’s sight was a little girl, covered in filth and holding a tattered stuffed lion, both were heading up onto the roof. He stood to go outside but, just then, the radio static faded back into the sound of someone barely able to speak, pleading for help to the sounds of crackling fire and exploding things. With a grimace and a nervous laugh, the old man just tuned the radio channel over to Control Station 17 and its old collection of classic, upbeat music broadcasting on a loop.
That music…that music and it’s static-laden stream of blips and beeps that sat far off in the staticky background…sounding like some kind of Morris code, I think. Bah! I’m starting to ramble again…
Cool breezes were not the most common thing in the wasteland but, this morning, the air felt cool as ever as the breeze gently dipped out of the clear blue sky. In the breeze, a sullen steel squeal of a weathered windmill whined…how’s that for alliteration, huh? Heh! kinda proud of myself for that! Rhythmically, it turned to hush and whine, hush and whine, clatter, hush and whine. The mill sat fixed to the roof of the old gas station —the only gas station— and served as the water-pump for the area as it doubled to help charge up batteries (a commodity in the wasteland). The morning sun throwing the mills shadow onto the quarter-panel of my rig that sat parked below. But, as the breeze settled, so too did the windmill and, finally, its metallic whine hushed up for a long bit. Even though the windmill sat silent, still, the sounds of electronics hummed away from near the base of one of its legs. There, at the foot of the windmill, sat a darkly colored and armored casing with red glowing lights at one end, and grouping of red lenses on the other. A sentinel —one of many— keeping a watchful eye on things.
You should know that this “sentinel” that I said is “keeping a watchful eye on things” is not exactly keeping an eye to make sure things stay safe, not exactly. But we’ll get to that later. For now…for now all you really need to know is that it’s there. Watching…
The gas station, atop which the mill sat, usually stood abustle with many comings and goings but, for some reason, today it sat quiet, save for the salty old man screaming away into his radio. Yeah, he does his best to direct cargo convoys through the valley on the safest routes to the station but, sometimes, those convoys lose some cargo and he loses a gasket…literally as that’s what the cargo usually is: gaskets and other assorted mechanical items. And, metaphorically too with a little bit of anger to show for it. The stations only customers were the truck drivers of the convoys, and people like me, scouts for the local clans who were looking to re-up on supplies and resources from those convoys. Today, I was there for the fuel.
When I had pulled up there that morning, I thought it was odd to see some guy and his kid daughter milling around the mill on the roof, and no convoy to be seen. The usual trucker chatter on the overhead speakers had been replaced by the soothing and melodic sounds of AC/DC. And, what’s more, it looked like Fang had hired a new hand to help out at the station. I saw the punk getting up as I turned the rig off, heading my direction.
“Hell yeah!” I says under my breath as I got out of my rig, gave the punk a nod and says “I’ll be right out to get some fuel,” then, headed inside.
“Diesel…” the old man inside says to me.
“Boss,” I says back. Yeah, his callsign was ObsidianFang but, face to face, everyone called him Boss. “What’s with the yokes on the roof? … and where’s the shipment?”
“Don’t ask me about the shipment, Diesel.” He huffed, “It ain’t here, is it?!”
“Up in smoke, huh?”
“Burnt to a crisp…” he sighed.
“Oh, wow, dad!” I heard the little girl come hopping down the outside of the building with a thud onto some old sheet metal. “I can’t believe we got another one!” she rushed into the building with excitement written all over her, and a cracked-up sentinel in her hands.
“Hey hey hey, honey!” her father scaled his way down more cautiously, I could tell because there were no thuds of any sort. “Slow down there, your old pops ain’t what he used to be!” he said as he made his way after her.
“What you got there?” I axed the girl as she stopped cold, right in front of me.
She looked at me as though I had just asked her for her one and only heart.
“What’s wrong with your voice?” she finally asked with wide eyes.
“Oh…right…” I says as I ran a hand across my neck tracing the old jagged scar with my fingertips and, for the first time in forever, I had been embarrassed about the sound of my gruff, half-choked voice. Some have remarked that it sounds like I eat cigarrets.
“Christine!” her father started in through the door of the shop, close enough to place a hand in front of the girl and usher her behind himself. Flushed from exertion, and suddenly aware that his daughter needed corralling, he turned to look at me. “I’m sorry about that…she’s not used to interacting with other people.”
“But daddy, her voice…” the little girl whispered.
“Please,” he says to both his girl and myself as he blushed. “I’m so sorry.”
“No, no…it’s okay,” and it was, and that’s when I actually heard my voice for the 1st time in a long time. I guess I had tuned out the grizzled manliness over the years. I leaned down to be eye to eye with the little girl, “Christine, is it?” and she shyly nodded. “I hurt my voice playing with guns, so, don’t ever play with guns, okay?” and she nodded vigorously.
“Is that true?” her dad asked as I stood up.
“I got my vocal cords severed when a .50 caliber rifle misfired in my face.”
His eyes went wide as he looked to the old man who just nodded to confirm my story.
“As for the accent, possibly Eastern Seaboard USA…I think…can’t be too sure about it these days but what I do know is my name’s L.A. You got a name, yourself?” I axed.
“I-…” he stopped to look curiously at his daughter, then, back to me. “I’m Carl.”
“What’s a carl, daddy?” Christine whispered up at him.
“I’ll explain later, honey.” He says quietly out of the side of his mouth. “She’s never heard my name before…” he says to me with loss in his eyes.
“Ah, I get it…” and I did: they had lost her mother at some point before the girl could talk, and he’s only ever been Daddy to her. “Change of subject, then. You guys hunting down sentinels, huh?” I pointed to the contraption in the girl’s hands.
Carl scratched at his shoulder as he motioned for Christine to let him take the thing, and she slipped it into his hand. “Electronic parts, actually.” He held it up in view. “These peepers are loaded with the stuff.”
“That they are,” I says, “That they are…” turning to the old man and throwing my thumb up pointing outside. “Who’s the new guy?”
“Huh?” Fang looked out with a squint. “Oh, just some punk —said he’d work for cheap— told’em he could have whatever whoever gives him for helping out…”
“Alright…” I nodded in thought while I fished around in my back pocket for a surprise. “I’m guessing since there’s no shipment, that, whatever fuel you got left is gonna be at a premium, right?”
“Premium price for a premium account like yours?” the old man laughed. “And have your whole clan after my hide for trying to take advantage…no thank you!” he laughed again but this time a little more nervously.
“Well, take this anyways…” like an old coin I flipped a small electronic chip into the air and onto the counter, and I started to turn to leave the building. “Maybe you can trade Carl here, sounds like he needs the chip for something.” I stopped at the doorway, and saw that punk was eyeballing Snaggletooth like he’d never seen anything like it. “I’m grabbing about 60 gallons…10 in the rig and 50 in the barrel.”
“Have at it!” Fang said while happily looking over the gold-pinned electronic chip. On my way out the door I overheard Fang try to recruit Carl, asking if he’d like to try and recover any of the cargo that was just lost down in the canyon.
“I’ll even let you keep some of the scrap you find, sound like a deal?”
The music from the radio suddenly faded as the blips and beeps overtook the transmission fading from music to a pirated broadcast signal, “Breaking! Breaking!” It was a woman’s voice, cheerful even, “Reports are coming in that this week’s supply convoy from the Reconstructed Quarter has been stopped along the border entrance to the canyon,” oddly enough, the woman’s voice seemed a little too cheerful for the news being delivered, and it continued, “Looks like these boys don’t know how to ease big things into tight spaces.” I stopped suddenly at the callous nature of the joke…I mean, people were dead and all…but I brushed it aside and continued my way out of the building tuning out the report since I already knew about the situation.
“Is that the same cargo you’re asking me about?” Carl asked.
“The very same!” Fang chuckled. “You in?”
But that was the last I heard of it all. Outside, compared to inside that stuffy store, the cool breeze felt more welcoming than ever. There was even a different sound to the shuffle of dirt under my boots, as though the light gusts just carried the sounds away. The broadcast had ended and, just like that, the song it had cut into returned from where it left off, Hells Bells! There came a small serenity in the moment that I’ve managed to hold on to for all this time. The blue and crisp sky of morning, the cool and crisp breeze, the view of the desert dunes…crisp…all seemed perfect and serene. Except for the whining windmill. Hells Bells!
That punk looked like he was drooling when I walked up, and I couldn’t blame him because Snaggletooth was something else. About the size of one of those old Chevy Suburban trucks but about seven inches lower to the ground. Instead of four wheels it had six (two up front and four in the back) and each wheel had razor-sharp spikes welded to the rims. The grill of the truck had been fortified with sharpened steel pipes protruding forwards that could skewer a man clean through. A single metal spike had been welded just to the left where the headlights should have been, and this spike was angled downwards, looking a jagged tooth, hence the rigs name, Snaggletooth. I could go on for days about each and every blade and spike which covered that beast but, safe to say, you could lose a limb if you lean up against it.
“Yeah, what’doya want?” the question shot quick and rough from a high pitched and annoying voice.
Rattled and disturbed from my peace I gruffly answered, “You know what I’m here for…”
“Yeah? What’doya got?” the punk spat back.
“The usual wares, how much you want?” I was referring to the wires, batteries, and scrap metal that one in the wasteland usually barters with.
He didn’t think one more second and, just like that, he raised his crossbow right at me, “How ‘bout all of it!” he meant my rig.
“Aw crap!” A crossbow bolt zipped passed my head as I dove for the ground. Now, sidenote, I thought I was using some serious big-brained muscles when I grabbed at my pocket for the starter module but, as you’re about to see, that was not the best of my ideas.
The rig roared to life as I clicked the module in my pocket and, as I triggered its weapons systems, one of its handy-dandy drones popped out of the side and clobbered me right in the dome. Knock me right out. When I woke up, the module had been fished outta’ my pocket and the rig was gone. Fang and the others stood over me, vultures circled overhead, and a lone explosion sounded far off in the distance…and that cool breeze mocked me as it gusted up to tussle my hair, tickling the bridge of my nose while I laid there in the dirt. And, woefully, the smell of excrement permeating all around. The sound of the weathered windmill picked back up as I, too, picked myself up, and it whined into the wind as I grumbled and shuffled off into the distance.
Yeah, for those that can’t visually put things together, let me spell it out for you in this here black and white: I crapped my pants when I got knocked out by the drone. Yeah, yeah, laugh it up…get it outta’ your system…these things happen. Meh… … …look, I’m sorry for getting antagonistic on you, there. Just, please, for the sake of everyone involved, try to work on that imagination of yours so that I don’t need to spell things out so matter-of-fact. It ruins the subtle mystique of reading between the lines. And, what’s a story without mystique? Well, it ain’t no story at all, that’s what.
Moving on!
Click this link to read Chapter 4
submitted by x100139 to u/x100139 [link] [comments]
Chapter 3: How to Lose a Rig in 30 Seconds
“God damnit!” the salty old man ripped his headset from his balding head and he tossed it aside the radio.
“I’m on fire!” squelched a voice through the earpiece. “Oh my God I’m on fire!” he screamed, and the sounds of the garbled scream cut off into static decay.
“Bunch of idiots…” he shook his head. “Can’t listen worth a hill of beans!” He sat back with a deep sigh as he wiped the look of mild annoyance and defeat from his face. He just shook his head as he reached to press a green button on the radio, it switched to an open channel as he held it in place and picked up his headset to grumble into the microphone, “ObsidianFang to all outposts, the convoy is toast…I repeat, the convoy is toast.” He depressed the button and, again, tossed the headset down aside the radio as he stood from behind the counter in his shop. He looked up from his things to see outside as a man, long-haired and disheveled walked by and started shimmying up onto the roof. “What in the world?” Just out of Fang’s sight was a little girl, covered in filth and holding a tattered stuffed lion, both were heading up onto the roof. He stood to go outside but, just then, the radio static faded back into the sound of someone barely able to speak, pleading for help to the sounds of crackling fire and exploding things. With a grimace and a nervous laugh, the old man just tuned the radio channel over to Control Station 17 and its old collection of classic, upbeat music broadcasting on a loop.
That music…that music and it’s static-laden stream of blips and beeps that sat far off in the staticky background…sounding like some kind of Morris code, I think. Bah! I’m starting to ramble again…
Cool breezes were not the most common thing in the wasteland but, this morning, the air felt cool as ever as the breeze gently dipped out of the clear blue sky. In the breeze, a sullen steel squeal of a weathered windmill whined…how’s that for alliteration, huh? Heh! kinda proud of myself for that! Rhythmically, it turned to hush and whine, hush and whine, clatter, hush and whine. The mill sat fixed to the roof of the old gas station —the only gas station— and served as the water-pump for the area as it doubled to help charge up batteries (a commodity in the wasteland). The morning sun throwing the mills shadow onto the quarter-panel of my rig that sat parked below. But, as the breeze settled, so too did the windmill and, finally, its metallic whine hushed up for a long bit. Even though the windmill sat silent, still, the sounds of electronics hummed away from near the base of one of its legs. There, at the foot of the windmill, sat a darkly colored and armored casing with red glowing lights at one end, and grouping of red lenses on the other. A sentinel —one of many— keeping a watchful eye on things.
You should know that this “sentinel” that I said is “keeping a watchful eye on things” is not exactly keeping an eye to make sure things stay safe, not exactly. But we’ll get to that later. For now…for now all you really need to know is that it’s there. Watching…
The gas station, atop which the mill sat, usually stood abustle with many comings and goings but, for some reason, today it sat quiet, save for the salty old man screaming away into his radio. Yeah, he does his best to direct cargo convoys through the valley on the safest routes to the station but, sometimes, those convoys lose some cargo and he loses a gasket…literally as that’s what the cargo usually is: gaskets and other assorted mechanical items. And, metaphorically too with a little bit of anger to show for it. The stations only customers were the truck drivers of the convoys, and people like me, scouts for the local clans who were looking to re-up on supplies and resources from those convoys. Today, I was there for the fuel.
When I had pulled up there that morning, I thought it was odd to see some guy and his kid daughter milling around the mill on the roof, and no convoy to be seen. The usual trucker chatter on the overhead speakers had been replaced by the soothing and melodic sounds of AC/DC. And, what’s more, it looked like Fang had hired a new hand to help out at the station. I saw the punk getting up as I turned the rig off, heading my direction.
“Hell yeah!” I says under my breath as I got out of my rig, gave the punk a nod and says “I’ll be right out to get some fuel,” then, headed inside.
“Diesel…” the old man inside says to me.
“Boss,” I says back. Yeah, his callsign was ObsidianFang but, face to face, everyone called him Boss. “What’s with the yokes on the roof? … and where’s the shipment?”
“Don’t ask me about the shipment, Diesel.” He huffed, “It ain’t here, is it?!”
“Up in smoke, huh?”
“Burnt to a crisp…” he sighed.
“Oh, wow, dad!” I heard the little girl come hopping down the outside of the building with a thud onto some old sheet metal. “I can’t believe we got another one!” she rushed into the building with excitement written all over her, and a cracked-up sentinel in her hands.
“Hey hey hey, honey!” her father scaled his way down more cautiously, I could tell because there were no thuds of any sort. “Slow down there, your old pops ain’t what he used to be!” he said as he made his way after her.
“What you got there?” I axed the girl as she stopped cold, right in front of me.
She looked at me as though I had just asked her for her one and only heart.
“What’s wrong with your voice?” she finally asked with wide eyes.
“Oh…right…” I says as I ran a hand across my neck tracing the old jagged scar with my fingertips and, for the first time in forever, I had been embarrassed about the sound of my gruff, half-choked voice. Some have remarked that it sounds like I eat cigarrets.
“Christine!” her father started in through the door of the shop, close enough to place a hand in front of the girl and usher her behind himself. Flushed from exertion, and suddenly aware that his daughter needed corralling, he turned to look at me. “I’m sorry about that…she’s not used to interacting with other people.”
“But daddy, her voice…” the little girl whispered.
“Please,” he says to both his girl and myself as he blushed. “I’m so sorry.”
“No, no…it’s okay,” and it was, and that’s when I actually heard my voice for the 1st time in a long time. I guess I had tuned out the grizzled manliness over the years. I leaned down to be eye to eye with the little girl, “Christine, is it?” and she shyly nodded. “I hurt my voice playing with guns, so, don’t ever play with guns, okay?” and she nodded vigorously.
“Is that true?” her dad asked as I stood up.
“I got my vocal cords severed when a .50 caliber rifle misfired in my face.”
His eyes went wide as he looked to the old man who just nodded to confirm my story.
“As for the accent, possibly Eastern Seaboard USA…I think…can’t be too sure about it these days but what I do know is my name’s L.A. You got a name, yourself?” I axed.
“I-…” he stopped to look curiously at his daughter, then, back to me. “I’m Carl.”
“What’s a carl, daddy?” Christine whispered up at him.
“I’ll explain later, honey.” He says quietly out of the side of his mouth. “She’s never heard my name before…” he says to me with loss in his eyes.
“Ah, I get it…” and I did: they had lost her mother at some point before the girl could talk, and he’s only ever been Daddy to her. “Change of subject, then. You guys hunting down sentinels, huh?” I pointed to the contraption in the girl’s hands.
Carl scratched at his shoulder as he motioned for Christine to let him take the thing, and she slipped it into his hand. “Electronic parts, actually.” He held it up in view. “These peepers are loaded with the stuff.”
“That they are,” I says, “That they are…” turning to the old man and throwing my thumb up pointing outside. “Who’s the new guy?”
“Huh?” Fang looked out with a squint. “Oh, just some punk —said he’d work for cheap— told’em he could have whatever whoever gives him for helping out…”
“Alright…” I nodded in thought while I fished around in my back pocket for a surprise. “I’m guessing since there’s no shipment, that, whatever fuel you got left is gonna be at a premium, right?”
“Premium price for a premium account like yours?” the old man laughed. “And have your whole clan after my hide for trying to take advantage…no thank you!” he laughed again but this time a little more nervously.
“Well, take this anyways…” like an old coin I flipped a small electronic chip into the air and onto the counter, and I started to turn to leave the building. “Maybe you can trade Carl here, sounds like he needs the chip for something.” I stopped at the doorway, and saw that punk was eyeballing Snaggletooth like he’d never seen anything like it. “I’m grabbing about 60 gallons…10 in the rig and 50 in the barrel.”
“Have at it!” Fang said while happily looking over the gold-pinned electronic chip. On my way out the door I overheard Fang try to recruit Carl, asking if he’d like to try and recover any of the cargo that was just lost down in the canyon.
“I’ll even let you keep some of the scrap you find, sound like a deal?”
The music from the radio suddenly faded as the blips and beeps overtook the transmission fading from music to a pirated broadcast signal, “Breaking! Breaking!” It was a woman’s voice, cheerful even, “Reports are coming in that this week’s supply convoy from the Reconstructed Quarter has been stopped along the border entrance to the canyon,” oddly enough, the woman’s voice seemed a little too cheerful for the news being delivered, and it continued, “Looks like these boys don’t know how to ease big things into tight spaces.” I stopped suddenly at the callous nature of the joke…I mean, people were dead and all…but I brushed it aside and continued my way out of the building tuning out the report since I already knew about the situation.
“Is that the same cargo you’re asking me about?” Carl asked.
“The very same!” Fang chuckled. “You in?”
But that was the last I heard of it all. Outside, compared to inside that stuffy store, the cool breeze felt more welcoming than ever. There was even a different sound to the shuffle of dirt under my boots, as though the light gusts just carried the sounds away. The broadcast had ended and, just like that, the song it had cut into returned from where it left off, Hells Bells! There came a small serenity in the moment that I’ve managed to hold on to for all this time. The blue and crisp sky of morning, the cool and crisp breeze, the view of the desert dunes…crisp…all seemed perfect and serene. Except for the whining windmill. Hells Bells!
That punk looked like he was drooling when I walked up, and I couldn’t blame him because Snaggletooth was something else. About the size of one of those old Chevy Suburban trucks but about seven inches lower to the ground. Instead of four wheels it had six (two up front and four in the back) and each wheel had razor-sharp spikes welded to the rims. The grill of the truck had been fortified with sharpened steel pipes protruding forwards that could skewer a man clean through. A single metal spike had been welded just to the left where the headlights should have been, and this spike was angled downwards, looking a jagged tooth, hence the rigs name, Snaggletooth. I could go on for days about each and every blade and spike which covered that beast but, safe to say, you could lose a limb if you lean up against it.
“Yeah, what’doya want?” the question shot quick and rough from a high pitched and annoying voice.
Rattled and disturbed from my peace I gruffly answered, “You know what I’m here for…”
“Yeah? What’doya got?” the punk spat back.
“The usual wares, how much you want?” I was referring to the wires, batteries, and scrap metal that one in the wasteland usually barters with.
He didn’t think one more second and, just like that, he raised his crossbow right at me, “How ‘bout all of it!” he meant my rig.
“Aw crap!” A crossbow bolt zipped passed my head as I dove for the ground. Now, sidenote, I thought I was using some serious big-brained muscles when I grabbed at my pocket for the starter module but, as you’re about to see, that was not the best of my ideas.
The rig roared to life as I clicked the module in my pocket and, as I triggered its weapons systems, one of its handy-dandy drones popped out of the side and clobbered me right in the dome. Knock me right out. When I woke up, the module had been fished outta’ my pocket and the rig was gone. Fang and the others stood over me, vultures circled overhead, and a lone explosion sounded far off in the distance…and that cool breeze mocked me as it gusted up to tussle my hair, tickling the bridge of my nose while I laid there in the dirt. And, woefully, the smell of excrement permeating all around. The sound of the weathered windmill picked back up as I, too, picked myself up, and it whined into the wind as I grumbled and shuffled off into the distance.
Yeah, for those that can’t visually put things together, let me spell it out for you in this here black and white: I crapped my pants when I got knocked out by the drone. Yeah, yeah, laugh it up…get it outta’ your system…these things happen. Meh… … …look, I’m sorry for getting antagonistic on you, there. Just, please, for the sake of everyone involved, try to work on that imagination of yours so that I don’t need to spell things out so matter-of-fact. It ruins the subtle mystique of reading between the lines. And, what’s a story without mystique? Well, it ain’t no story at all, that’s what.
Moving on!
Click this link to read Chapter 4
2024.04.11 15:32 joesoldlegs Who would guys say BIG's musical influences were?
I'd say
G Rap - Both husky/overweight rappers who specialized rapping about gritty street and grand mafioso themes while mastering the use of internal and multi-syllable rhyme scenes, alliteration, and vivid storytelling.
Heavy D - The original archetype for the smooth overweight lover which BIG, Pun, 8Ball, Rozay, Chubb Rock and others heavily played into.
King Tee - Was BIG's favorite rapper which you can definitely tell on Ready To Die since their voices and flows sound so similar on that record.
Pac - Influenced BIG to wear Versace and got him to start appealing to women in his music. Ready To Die was also heavily influenced by Pac thematically in that he was more vulnerable and emotional when talking about what the average street mf goes through.
LL - Was the original ladies man and knew how to make hardcore music and radio hits to attract both audiences. Unrelated but I kinda hear his influence on Meth except that Meth leaned more into the hardcore shit.
Rakim - Goes without saying seeing as he influenced literally everyone to the point hip hop history is damn near divided into before and after Rakim eras.
Kane - Had that Brooklyn coolness and air of confidence you kinda feel with other Brooklyn rappers after him like BIG and Hov.
Scarface - He was a mafioso pioneer as well and was very good at detailing the mental health issues that are so common in the streets, which you can see rubbed off on BIG in songs like Suicidal Thoughts. He (and Pac) were good at portraying the vulnerable and emotional sides of the average dude in the streets which I thought BIG really tapped into on Ready To Die which is why that was so much more well received than Life After Death.
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G Rap - Both husky/overweight rappers who specialized rapping about gritty street and grand mafioso themes while mastering the use of internal and multi-syllable rhyme scenes, alliteration, and vivid storytelling.
Heavy D - The original archetype for the smooth overweight lover which BIG, Pun, 8Ball, Rozay, Chubb Rock and others heavily played into.
King Tee - Was BIG's favorite rapper which you can definitely tell on Ready To Die since their voices and flows sound so similar on that record.
Pac - Influenced BIG to wear Versace and got him to start appealing to women in his music. Ready To Die was also heavily influenced by Pac thematically in that he was more vulnerable and emotional when talking about what the average street mf goes through.
LL - Was the original ladies man and knew how to make hardcore music and radio hits to attract both audiences. Unrelated but I kinda hear his influence on Meth except that Meth leaned more into the hardcore shit.
Rakim - Goes without saying seeing as he influenced literally everyone to the point hip hop history is damn near divided into before and after Rakim eras.
Kane - Had that Brooklyn coolness and air of confidence you kinda feel with other Brooklyn rappers after him like BIG and Hov.
Scarface - He was a mafioso pioneer as well and was very good at detailing the mental health issues that are so common in the streets, which you can see rubbed off on BIG in songs like Suicidal Thoughts. He (and Pac) were good at portraying the vulnerable and emotional sides of the average dude in the streets which I thought BIG really tapped into on Ready To Die which is why that was so much more well received than Life After Death.
2024.04.08 17:12 TA_Account_12 Keepers for next year
Now that most league are over, wanted to make a thread about keepers/breakouts due to more opportunities that might come up next year. My league allows 4 keepers so was looking into players and I figured it'd be great to discuss it here. These are of course my opinions, and I'm happy to hear what you guys think. Also, a lot of this is coloured by my experiences with my league. We are an auction league and add 4 bucks to any keeper from their last year's salary. A FA is 3 bucks. Which means if I pick up someone from the free agency on the last day, he will be 7 bucks next year and 11 the next. I'm also in a 14 team league so our waivers are a barren wasteland which consists of just teams picking up and rotating The Pencil HB, THJ, Royce O'Neal amongst us. It also means the options are super limited since it's a roto league and people are still holding on to all the actual good players. So for me, to get a 7 buck (and 11 the next year) good player from FA under my control for 2 years is huge.
Atlanta - Most of us have been on the OO train for a while, but the Hawks have been unwilling to trade CC and hop on. And tbh, it's not like Capela has been bad. He is also just 29. That said, he is going into the last year of his contract and is an expiring this year. Hawks will have to extend Jalen the year after, plus they likely match Bey's offer as a RFA this year so they might want to shed some salary. It might not happen till the trade deadline though so I feel like we need to look at the backcourt instead. There have been the DJM trade rumours, the Trae to the Spurs rumours. If either of these happens, Bogdan plays his way into a bigger role. With AJ griffin having likely been kidnapped by Beyonce stans or something, Kobe "The untradeable" Bufkin likely becomes the sixth man. As a young guard there will likely be lots of efficiency issues, so he's probably better in points than cats. Likely the best option still remains the old reliables. Bogdan and Onyeka.
Boston Celtics - They very likely bring exactly the same team back. There are no great keeper options here. All of their top players are signed through the next year. Maybe PP improves so much he starts getting minutes over White Holiday, but that's very very unlikely. Maybe they rest Horford a bit more, and in those games Hauser or The Cashier play some bigger roles. But that won't make them must rosters. So best keeper option - Nobody.
Brooklyn Nets - Now this is where things get really interesting. This team, let's face it, sucks. Plenty of us got sucked in by half a season of great Bridges production only to be burnt badly this year. Their "Core" is also sort of locked in. Other than Claxton, Lonnie, and DSJ, most of their rotational players are locked into their contracts, even if Brooklyn wished they were not (cough Simmons cough). Cam thomas is due for an extension the year after and seems to be a much better 1st option scorer than Mikal. However, he still isn't a great categories option. He's ranked outside top 50 over the past 2 weeks despite playing close to 38 mpg. People can love him, but he has some undeniable holes in his game. If somehow Benny boy is magically HEALED, COMPLETELY HEALED, he might have some actual sneaky upside next year. But the chances of that are not that great. His back seems to be giving up on him so likely he continues to load manage next year. Combined with the fact that he is also an expiring 40 million contract, and the Nets not needing him, he is also likely is a massive trade bait. Dennis, CamJ, DFS, Mikal are all going to be pretty much what they are with not much extra upside. Lonnie and DSJ, even if they come back, aren't really 12-14 team options. There is the question of Jalen Wilson who has actually shown flashes of being a solid player. However, where does he even get the minutes? He will still be lower in the depth chart behind the plethora of wings the Nets have. All of this wall of text was to point us to one position and one person. Nicholas Claxton. The Nets will want him. He's just 24 years old. He's a great shot blocker and a decent rebounder. He's a perfect young C for a young team. However, the Grizzlies loom in the background, trying to poach him. Memphis destroyed their big man depth this year, trading away both their starting C, and the projected backup, in Adams and Tillman. They have a glaring need at C, and their star has past connections to Claxton and has tentatively shown a desire to bring him in. Full breakdown of the rumours here. If Claxton stays with Nets, he will have a solid season. If he goes to the grizzlies, he might even have a bigger season. Last year Grizzlies were 8th in pace. Claxton might thrive in a high paced offense running and gunslinging alongside Ja. But that's for later. Right now lets consider the scenario for the Nets. If Claxton stays, he has a good season. If he does not, it opens up a great opportunity for a couple of players. Noah Clowney and Day'Ron Sharpe. C position is where young guys can usually make the most impact from. The rebounding, shot blocking and usually high fg% will make these guys great fantasy assets. So far, Noah seems to be parting the seas and getting to the opportunities before Sharpe. He might sneakily be one of the best FA pickups in keeper leagues. In our league, where we can choose keepers upto the week before the draft, I already picked him up. If he works out, I got a great keeper for next year. If not, we drop him and no harm done. To bold him, cause I honestly don't expect anyone to read all of that, Noah, the sea parter, Pennywise, Clowney
Charlotte Chucklefucks - A bit harsh maybe. But I'm a sucker for alliteration. At first glance, they might seem like an interesting team for fantasy. But in reality, in terms of keepers they aren't particularly interesting. Their starters next year are going to be pretty similar to what they have this year. Mark Williams, if he is alive, slides into the 5 spot. Miles, if they sign him, or Grant, if they don't is their 4. Then we have Miller and LaMelo. Only 1 starter position is up for grabs. The replacement for Rozier at SG (or SF, depending on what position you consider Miller). They have Tre "League Winner" Mann and Micic, both under contract for the next year. Lamelo is going to dominate the ball, which will limit ball handling opportunities for both of those guys. Micic seems to be the better player, but Mann seems to be the better 3 point shooter. Micic's biggest strength is his playmaking which might be severely limited playing alongside Lamelo anyways. So I'm going to have to go with Mann. Outside of that, the only real interesting thing with their rotation will be their draft pick really. It is very likely that they just draft a wing (Holland maybe) and just slot him next to Lamelo and Miller and be done with it. So in reality everything I've mentioned about them is a moot point but on the off chance they fuck everything up and cause I can't really pick nobody who was already drafted and is playing for Boston, I'd pick Tre Mann.
Chicago Bullshits - Holy shit, this team is a fucking dumpster fire. They don't have any cap space unless they dump everyone they can. Lonzo can't get healthy. No one wants to trade for Lavine. Vuc is bad. Patrick Williams is a bust. DD is old. His cap hit also happens to be over 40 million which severely limits what they can do in free agency. Their best case scenario is DD signs an extension early and gives them a huge discount. But that seems unlikely. A more realistic expectation is that they continue to be a middling team in a weak conference and refuse to blow it up. Coby/Caruso (Ayo and Terry if you stretch it) seem to be the only bright spots for their future. It seems very likely that they hold on to their pieces and just do it all over again despite that being the definition of madness. If Lonzo can get healthy maybe they are good, but if your team's best hope is a guy who couldn't walk up the stairs without pain an year ago, it doesn't look good. Likely their rotation is Vuc/DD/Lavine/Coby/Lonzo with Drummond/Terry/Caruso/Ayo/Pat (or someone equally bad). So not a great keeper scenario here either. Unless you want to take a punt on Lonzo. The better hope here is that Kyle Filipowski falls to them and slots in to PF and somehow is exactly what they need to have a functioning offense and defense.
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Atlanta - Most of us have been on the OO train for a while, but the Hawks have been unwilling to trade CC and hop on. And tbh, it's not like Capela has been bad. He is also just 29. That said, he is going into the last year of his contract and is an expiring this year. Hawks will have to extend Jalen the year after, plus they likely match Bey's offer as a RFA this year so they might want to shed some salary. It might not happen till the trade deadline though so I feel like we need to look at the backcourt instead. There have been the DJM trade rumours, the Trae to the Spurs rumours. If either of these happens, Bogdan plays his way into a bigger role. With AJ griffin having likely been kidnapped by Beyonce stans or something, Kobe "The untradeable" Bufkin likely becomes the sixth man. As a young guard there will likely be lots of efficiency issues, so he's probably better in points than cats. Likely the best option still remains the old reliables. Bogdan and Onyeka.
Boston Celtics - They very likely bring exactly the same team back. There are no great keeper options here. All of their top players are signed through the next year. Maybe PP improves so much he starts getting minutes over White Holiday, but that's very very unlikely. Maybe they rest Horford a bit more, and in those games Hauser or The Cashier play some bigger roles. But that won't make them must rosters. So best keeper option - Nobody.
Brooklyn Nets - Now this is where things get really interesting. This team, let's face it, sucks. Plenty of us got sucked in by half a season of great Bridges production only to be burnt badly this year. Their "Core" is also sort of locked in. Other than Claxton, Lonnie, and DSJ, most of their rotational players are locked into their contracts, even if Brooklyn wished they were not (cough Simmons cough). Cam thomas is due for an extension the year after and seems to be a much better 1st option scorer than Mikal. However, he still isn't a great categories option. He's ranked outside top 50 over the past 2 weeks despite playing close to 38 mpg. People can love him, but he has some undeniable holes in his game. If somehow Benny boy is magically HEALED, COMPLETELY HEALED, he might have some actual sneaky upside next year. But the chances of that are not that great. His back seems to be giving up on him so likely he continues to load manage next year. Combined with the fact that he is also an expiring 40 million contract, and the Nets not needing him, he is also likely is a massive trade bait. Dennis, CamJ, DFS, Mikal are all going to be pretty much what they are with not much extra upside. Lonnie and DSJ, even if they come back, aren't really 12-14 team options. There is the question of Jalen Wilson who has actually shown flashes of being a solid player. However, where does he even get the minutes? He will still be lower in the depth chart behind the plethora of wings the Nets have. All of this wall of text was to point us to one position and one person. Nicholas Claxton. The Nets will want him. He's just 24 years old. He's a great shot blocker and a decent rebounder. He's a perfect young C for a young team. However, the Grizzlies loom in the background, trying to poach him. Memphis destroyed their big man depth this year, trading away both their starting C, and the projected backup, in Adams and Tillman. They have a glaring need at C, and their star has past connections to Claxton and has tentatively shown a desire to bring him in. Full breakdown of the rumours here. If Claxton stays with Nets, he will have a solid season. If he goes to the grizzlies, he might even have a bigger season. Last year Grizzlies were 8th in pace. Claxton might thrive in a high paced offense running and gunslinging alongside Ja. But that's for later. Right now lets consider the scenario for the Nets. If Claxton stays, he has a good season. If he does not, it opens up a great opportunity for a couple of players. Noah Clowney and Day'Ron Sharpe. C position is where young guys can usually make the most impact from. The rebounding, shot blocking and usually high fg% will make these guys great fantasy assets. So far, Noah seems to be parting the seas and getting to the opportunities before Sharpe. He might sneakily be one of the best FA pickups in keeper leagues. In our league, where we can choose keepers upto the week before the draft, I already picked him up. If he works out, I got a great keeper for next year. If not, we drop him and no harm done. To bold him, cause I honestly don't expect anyone to read all of that, Noah, the sea parter, Pennywise, Clowney
Charlotte Chucklefucks - A bit harsh maybe. But I'm a sucker for alliteration. At first glance, they might seem like an interesting team for fantasy. But in reality, in terms of keepers they aren't particularly interesting. Their starters next year are going to be pretty similar to what they have this year. Mark Williams, if he is alive, slides into the 5 spot. Miles, if they sign him, or Grant, if they don't is their 4. Then we have Miller and LaMelo. Only 1 starter position is up for grabs. The replacement for Rozier at SG (or SF, depending on what position you consider Miller). They have Tre "League Winner" Mann and Micic, both under contract for the next year. Lamelo is going to dominate the ball, which will limit ball handling opportunities for both of those guys. Micic seems to be the better player, but Mann seems to be the better 3 point shooter. Micic's biggest strength is his playmaking which might be severely limited playing alongside Lamelo anyways. So I'm going to have to go with Mann. Outside of that, the only real interesting thing with their rotation will be their draft pick really. It is very likely that they just draft a wing (Holland maybe) and just slot him next to Lamelo and Miller and be done with it. So in reality everything I've mentioned about them is a moot point but on the off chance they fuck everything up and cause I can't really pick nobody who was already drafted and is playing for Boston, I'd pick Tre Mann.
Chicago Bullshits - Holy shit, this team is a fucking dumpster fire. They don't have any cap space unless they dump everyone they can. Lonzo can't get healthy. No one wants to trade for Lavine. Vuc is bad. Patrick Williams is a bust. DD is old. His cap hit also happens to be over 40 million which severely limits what they can do in free agency. Their best case scenario is DD signs an extension early and gives them a huge discount. But that seems unlikely. A more realistic expectation is that they continue to be a middling team in a weak conference and refuse to blow it up. Coby/Caruso (Ayo and Terry if you stretch it) seem to be the only bright spots for their future. It seems very likely that they hold on to their pieces and just do it all over again despite that being the definition of madness. If Lonzo can get healthy maybe they are good, but if your team's best hope is a guy who couldn't walk up the stairs without pain an year ago, it doesn't look good. Likely their rotation is Vuc/DD/Lavine/Coby/Lonzo with Drummond/Terry/Caruso/Ayo/Pat (or someone equally bad). So not a great keeper scenario here either. Unless you want to take a punt on Lonzo. The better hope here is that Kyle Filipowski falls to them and slots in to PF and somehow is exactly what they need to have a functioning offense and defense.
2024.03.14 08:13 RoseBlack2222 A Very Uneggcellent St. Patrick's Day And Unlucky Easter
Everyone knows that there are holidays, but where do they come from? Are they made by people deciding what to celebrate? Perhaps. However, there is another reason, a place where all holiday figures hail. Is it a magical castle? Nope. Is it a magical fairyland up in the clouds? Still no.
Then surely it must be a place that exists in the realm of dreams, right? All incorrect. Where they hail is in the place between dreams and the waking world. To be more specific, they come from an infinitely tall office building. This is where our story takes place.
“This is the last fucking straw!”
Lowell Joy sighed upon hearing this and put his pen down. He was looking over some paperwork, but it would have to wait. He counted to himself.
3…2…1
His office door swung open, bouncing off the stopper and becoming closed once more. What followed were small yet aggressive footsteps. Lowell peered over his desk.
“Happy March, Graeme, what brings you here?”
The man staring up at him had an expression that could make an oak shrink back. Lowell was used to it, though. Graeme was the head of St. Patrick’s Day. Usually, this leprechaun would be jolly during this month if not for a certain long-eared bipedal.
“You know god damn well what!”
He pulled something out from his coat. It was a calendar.
“What is this?” he asked, pointing to March 17 which had a four-leaf clover under it.
“That would be when your holiday occurs I believe.”
“Exactly and this?”
March 31 was the date he pointed to next and it contained a colorful egg.
“Do we really need to go through this again?” Lowell asked.
“You’re damn right I do. If that bunny thinks he can pull this shit, he has another think coming!”
Sensing Graeme was going to request, or demand rather, his presence, Lowell hit a button on his desk and spoke into it.
“Arledge, please report to my office.”
Arledge was on his lunch break with a big salad before him. Sitting across from him with a plate of cookies was Santa Claus.
“I noticed your big day is going to be at the end of this month,” Santa said. “That’s a bit earlier than some of your other years. Isn’t it?”
‘That’s right and that’s why I’ve been eating so much. I gotta make sure to keep my strength up!”
“Smart thinking, but I’d consider some of these if I were you.”
Santa held up a cookie.
“They put me in the shape I need to deliver presents.”
He popped it into his mouth. Arledge thought “in shape” was a bit subjective. However, he was too polite to say this.
“I think I’ll stick with my veggies, thanks.”
“Suit yourself.”
Santa washed down the cookie with some milk. Arledge had a glass of carrot juice to wash his meal down with. As he was enjoying his meal, Lowell’s voice came over the speaker, requesting his presence.
“Trouble?” Santa asked.
“Not that I know of. I thought I’ve been doing pretty well lately.”
Later, there was a knock on Lowell’s door.
“Enter.”
“You wanted to see me?” Arledge said, closing the door behind him.
“No, I did!” Graeme told him.
Arledge saw that the leprechaun was sitting in a chair with his arms crossed. He glared at him and furiously chewed on the pipe in his mouth.
“Of course, I should have known.”
“Show him the calendar!” Graeme demanded of Lowell.
“I was getting to that. Please try to exercise some patience.”
After looking it over, Arledge asked simply, “Graeme, what do you expect me to do about this?”
Graeme shot up, the chair enabling him to stand at face length with the bunny.
“What I want you to do is pick a date for Easter and stick with it! No more of this date-jumping shit! No pun intended.”
Arledge rolled his eyes.
“We’ve been over this. I don’t have any control over it. Blame the moon.”
“Oh, really, you don’t have any control over it? Because last I checked, people like Santa and the Baby New Year both have managed to accomplish this. Hell, even that colonizing fuck, Christopher has his set date!”
“What about the turkey?”
“He gets a pass on alliteration. You, on the other hand, need to stop sticking your flea-bitten paws in my month!”
Arledge was known to be patient. Even he had his lines, though, and one of them was just crossed.
“Well, I’m sorry about that.”
“Damn right, you are.”
“And I’m sorry your holiday isn’t as popular as mine.”
Rage spilled out of Graeme like lava.
“Oh, please, that’s easy when you only have to appeal to a bunch of snot-nosed little shits!”
“What can I say? I prefer a child’s smile to hangovers and vomit in an alleyway.”
Graeme’s scowl curved into a wicked smile.
“Since you mentioned that, how about we have a drink in Italy? You’re a big gan of their wine, right?”
Arledge’s ears drooped. A while ago he decided to indulge in a little wine. At the time, Graeme had informed him it was something that came from grapes, neglecting to mention the effects it had after consumption. The result of this was him waking up on a farm, after having consumed a substantial portion of its produce, and then getting chased away by a man with a pitchfork.
“At least I’ve never had to hide in a dumpster!”
“That was one damn time! Those little bastards snuck up on me!”
Sensing the situation was getting out of hand, Lowell interjected.
“Bickering isn’t getting us closer to a solution so I suggest we try to be mature about this.”
“What do you suggest then?” Arledge asked.
“I think perhaps Easter having a more stable date would make things easier.”
Graeme’s smug grin was wiped away by Arledge’s next words.
“Why should I? The theme fits. The date hops around and so do I. Besides, if we're being truthful, St. Patrick's Day isn't that important.”
“What did you just say, you fuzzy fuck?”
“Maybe I wasn’t clear. What I said was if your holiday was gone tomorrow, the only people who would miss it would be a bunch of no-good no-account deadbeats going around with piss running down their legs!”
“I’ll have you in a stew!”
In a flash, Garaeme was leaping from his seat at Arledge. Then there was punching, biting, scratching, and chairs being thrown. Lowell ducked one and it smashed through his window.
“Ow,” someone yelled after being hit by it.
“Oh, Jesus Christ,” Lowell said.
There was another knock at the door, interrupting the fight. It opened.
“Jesus, what are you doing here?” Lowell asked, seeing him step inside.
Jesus made his way over to him, carefully stepping over an overturned chair.
“I heard you say my name.”
“Oh, that, sorry, it was just an expression. I’m dealing with a bit of a situation here as you can see.”
He gestured to Arledge and Graeme.
“Yes, it is a shame when friends quarrel,” Jesus said.
“Who said we were friends?” Arledge asked.
“For once, I agree with the rabbit,” Graeme said, “and you can turn water into wine. You should be on my side!”
“Hey, I make church fun for kids on Easter Sunday,” Arledge told him.
“Please, settle down,” Jesus interjected. “This may not be my business, but I sense it requires my assistance so what is the issue here, Lowell?”
After explaining, Jesus pondered for a moment.
“I may have a solution. Why not hold a contest? You both can switch holidays for this year and whoever does a better job gets to have their way.”
The bunny and leprechaun considered this.
“I do like the sound of that,” Graeme admitted. “What would be the terms?”
For once in this ordeal, it was Lowell’s turn to smile.
“I’m glad you asked. Whoever wins will have the date of their holiday remain as is.”
“What if we lose?” Arledge asked.
“Then the date of your holiday will be moved…To August!”
Even Jesus gasped at the brutality of these words. August wasn’t a month known for holidays aside from “National Such And Such Day”. However, it had no widely recognized holidays. The reason for this was something many people around the office came to call “The August Effect”. By then the Earth is at the extreme of both temperatures.
One side of the world is so scorching hot it makes people irritable and more prone to violence. Meanwhile, on the other, you have blizzards and icy roads. Both of these aren't ideal if say people want to hunt for eggs or search for leprechauns.
Although, staying at home would probably cause people to drink more.
“You’re out of your mind!” Graeme protested.
“Yeah, that's just sick!” Arledge added.
“Perhaps you two should have thought of that before you wrecked my office, again.”
Arledge and Graeme thought about disputing this but knew they were in too deep.
“Your success will be determined by the amount of holiday spirit you generate. I suggest you get started right away.”
The two of them left to prepare for their contest.
“So, who are you betting on?” Lowell asked Jesus.
“You know I am not a gambling man,” he replied, “but if I were…”
He gestured for Lowell to lean forward and he whispered something in his ear.
“Seriously?” Lowell said in shock.
Jesus gave a conspiratorial grin.
“God damn,” Lowell told him. “Oh, sorry.”
“Please, I got over that a long time ago.”
St. Patrick’s Day came.
“This will be a piece of cake,” Arledge thought. “What do I really need to do when I boil it down? Hide some gold? Run away from some kids? That leprechaun is going to be kissing March goodbye!”
His confidence dwindled when he received a message from Lowell on his phone.
“Don’t forget about the shoes.”
“This is no big deal. I can just make some from my eggs,” he said to himself.
This seemed like a good plan until he realized his eggs weren’t large enough for that which meant he’d have to make the shoes all by hand, or paw in this case. His first attempt resulted in leather scraps. The second was aesthetically pleasing until they fell apart after he picked them up. He had several million shoes to make. Needless to say, he was in over his ears.
Easter Sunday arrived.
“That stupid rabbit thinks he can beat me,” Garaeme thought. “Everyone knows that you never send a rodent to do a leprechaun’s job! All I have to do is paint some eggs then hide them and I’ll have this in the bag!”
He already had the eggs. All he would need to do is paint them. Luckily, he had some tricks up his sleeve. He threw some magic dust on the eggs. All of them turned green at once and he laughed in triumph.
He then noticed his right pocket was shining. From it, he pulled out a scroll. He unrolled it, revealing a message from Lowell. It wiped away any notion he had of an easy victory.
“Don’t forget that the eggs need to be different colors.”
He blinked and then glanced at the endless amount of eggs in his possession. It took a moment for the realization that he’d need to paint them all by hand to settle in.
“Fuck!”
Lowell stepped into his office on April 1st. He sidestepped the bucket of water that had been propped above his door. Then he used some scissors to cut the tripwire that would have left him tarred and feathered. He plucked the spike sticking up from his chair and tested its stability as well as if there was glue on it. When he was satisfied, he sat down.
He kept a mini fridge that he made sure to lock before he left. In it, he’d been keeping an Italian sub. He examined it, seeing it was still wrapped tight as he’d left it. He tore off the wrapping and bit into it only to be met with a mouthful of glue. He spat it out.
“I’m done for!” Arledge thought as he was walking to Lowell’s office.
St, Patrick’s Day had been a disaster for him. Not only did he fail miserably in shoe-making, the amount of alcohol he had to consume made his Italy incident seem tame. His only bit of luck was that the bullets had missed him. As he was having this crisis, he bumped into Graeme.
“Watch where you’re going, floppy-eared shit!”
Arledge knew if he showed any weakness it would be like blood in water.
“My bad, did I almost step on you?”
Graeme was ready to fight again but maintained his composure.
“You know what? I don’t need to waste my time with you because I’m winning for sure!”
“Does that mean Easter went well for you?”
Graeme thought back to how much his wrists ached from painting the eggs, most of which got broken in the process of him trying to hide them. Several times they were taken by an animal and once a bird snatched him off the ground. That made him cry for his mother and he struggled until he was dropped into a thorny bush. That had been a painful ordeal.
“It went great,” he replied. “How did things go with you? I bet it wasn’t so easy.”
“I’ll have you know I didn’t break a sweat, but that’s for Lowell to decide.”
In his office, they watched footage on Lowell’s TV of how they did. The embarrassment they felt was indescribable and both wished a giant hole would swallow them up.
“Games normally have one loser and one winner,” Lowell said, “but in this case, there are two losers.”
“What’s going to happen to us?” Graeme asked in a defeated voice.
“It may surprise you both to know that there is a concept called sharing.”
“Wait, so our holidays won't be moved to August?” Arledge said.
“No, they will remain as is.”
“What the hell?” Graeme snapped. “After all this shit, this damn bunny still gets his way!”
Lowell put up his hand and Graeme became silent.
“Not quite, I don't think moving your holidays would have solved anything anyway. What I think would be is if you two learned to put your differences aside. Therefore, you two will be helping each other on their respective holidays from now on.”
Arledge and Graeme exchanged a glance.
“You know, August might not be that bad,” Arledge said.
“It's too late. This decision is final. I suggest you begin working on getting along. Now, kindly get the hell out of my office.”
The bunny and leprechaun left, unsure of how their future would play out. Lowell got a candy bar that he’d kept in a hidden drawer. When he bit into it, he tasted dirt.
“I hate April Fool's Day.”
The moral of this story is most people don't know what the hell they're talking about so they should think before assuming. Otherwise, they may just end up embarrassed.
Author's Note: Happy St. Patrick's Day and early Easter I guess. Since this year they're both in the same month, I decided to lump them together into one story. If you enjoy it, consider checking out my other stories here, my articles here, and lastly, how you can support me here.
submitted by RoseBlack2222 to Odd_directions [link] [comments]
Then surely it must be a place that exists in the realm of dreams, right? All incorrect. Where they hail is in the place between dreams and the waking world. To be more specific, they come from an infinitely tall office building. This is where our story takes place.
“This is the last fucking straw!”
Lowell Joy sighed upon hearing this and put his pen down. He was looking over some paperwork, but it would have to wait. He counted to himself.
3…2…1
His office door swung open, bouncing off the stopper and becoming closed once more. What followed were small yet aggressive footsteps. Lowell peered over his desk.
“Happy March, Graeme, what brings you here?”
The man staring up at him had an expression that could make an oak shrink back. Lowell was used to it, though. Graeme was the head of St. Patrick’s Day. Usually, this leprechaun would be jolly during this month if not for a certain long-eared bipedal.
“You know god damn well what!”
He pulled something out from his coat. It was a calendar.
“What is this?” he asked, pointing to March 17 which had a four-leaf clover under it.
“That would be when your holiday occurs I believe.”
“Exactly and this?”
March 31 was the date he pointed to next and it contained a colorful egg.
“Do we really need to go through this again?” Lowell asked.
“You’re damn right I do. If that bunny thinks he can pull this shit, he has another think coming!”
Sensing Graeme was going to request, or demand rather, his presence, Lowell hit a button on his desk and spoke into it.
“Arledge, please report to my office.”
Arledge was on his lunch break with a big salad before him. Sitting across from him with a plate of cookies was Santa Claus.
“I noticed your big day is going to be at the end of this month,” Santa said. “That’s a bit earlier than some of your other years. Isn’t it?”
‘That’s right and that’s why I’ve been eating so much. I gotta make sure to keep my strength up!”
“Smart thinking, but I’d consider some of these if I were you.”
Santa held up a cookie.
“They put me in the shape I need to deliver presents.”
He popped it into his mouth. Arledge thought “in shape” was a bit subjective. However, he was too polite to say this.
“I think I’ll stick with my veggies, thanks.”
“Suit yourself.”
Santa washed down the cookie with some milk. Arledge had a glass of carrot juice to wash his meal down with. As he was enjoying his meal, Lowell’s voice came over the speaker, requesting his presence.
“Trouble?” Santa asked.
“Not that I know of. I thought I’ve been doing pretty well lately.”
Later, there was a knock on Lowell’s door.
“Enter.”
“You wanted to see me?” Arledge said, closing the door behind him.
“No, I did!” Graeme told him.
Arledge saw that the leprechaun was sitting in a chair with his arms crossed. He glared at him and furiously chewed on the pipe in his mouth.
“Of course, I should have known.”
“Show him the calendar!” Graeme demanded of Lowell.
“I was getting to that. Please try to exercise some patience.”
After looking it over, Arledge asked simply, “Graeme, what do you expect me to do about this?”
Graeme shot up, the chair enabling him to stand at face length with the bunny.
“What I want you to do is pick a date for Easter and stick with it! No more of this date-jumping shit! No pun intended.”
Arledge rolled his eyes.
“We’ve been over this. I don’t have any control over it. Blame the moon.”
“Oh, really, you don’t have any control over it? Because last I checked, people like Santa and the Baby New Year both have managed to accomplish this. Hell, even that colonizing fuck, Christopher has his set date!”
“What about the turkey?”
“He gets a pass on alliteration. You, on the other hand, need to stop sticking your flea-bitten paws in my month!”
Arledge was known to be patient. Even he had his lines, though, and one of them was just crossed.
“Well, I’m sorry about that.”
“Damn right, you are.”
“And I’m sorry your holiday isn’t as popular as mine.”
Rage spilled out of Graeme like lava.
“Oh, please, that’s easy when you only have to appeal to a bunch of snot-nosed little shits!”
“What can I say? I prefer a child’s smile to hangovers and vomit in an alleyway.”
Graeme’s scowl curved into a wicked smile.
“Since you mentioned that, how about we have a drink in Italy? You’re a big gan of their wine, right?”
Arledge’s ears drooped. A while ago he decided to indulge in a little wine. At the time, Graeme had informed him it was something that came from grapes, neglecting to mention the effects it had after consumption. The result of this was him waking up on a farm, after having consumed a substantial portion of its produce, and then getting chased away by a man with a pitchfork.
“At least I’ve never had to hide in a dumpster!”
“That was one damn time! Those little bastards snuck up on me!”
Sensing the situation was getting out of hand, Lowell interjected.
“Bickering isn’t getting us closer to a solution so I suggest we try to be mature about this.”
“What do you suggest then?” Arledge asked.
“I think perhaps Easter having a more stable date would make things easier.”
Graeme’s smug grin was wiped away by Arledge’s next words.
“Why should I? The theme fits. The date hops around and so do I. Besides, if we're being truthful, St. Patrick's Day isn't that important.”
“What did you just say, you fuzzy fuck?”
“Maybe I wasn’t clear. What I said was if your holiday was gone tomorrow, the only people who would miss it would be a bunch of no-good no-account deadbeats going around with piss running down their legs!”
“I’ll have you in a stew!”
In a flash, Garaeme was leaping from his seat at Arledge. Then there was punching, biting, scratching, and chairs being thrown. Lowell ducked one and it smashed through his window.
“Ow,” someone yelled after being hit by it.
“Oh, Jesus Christ,” Lowell said.
There was another knock at the door, interrupting the fight. It opened.
“Jesus, what are you doing here?” Lowell asked, seeing him step inside.
Jesus made his way over to him, carefully stepping over an overturned chair.
“I heard you say my name.”
“Oh, that, sorry, it was just an expression. I’m dealing with a bit of a situation here as you can see.”
He gestured to Arledge and Graeme.
“Yes, it is a shame when friends quarrel,” Jesus said.
“Who said we were friends?” Arledge asked.
“For once, I agree with the rabbit,” Graeme said, “and you can turn water into wine. You should be on my side!”
“Hey, I make church fun for kids on Easter Sunday,” Arledge told him.
“Please, settle down,” Jesus interjected. “This may not be my business, but I sense it requires my assistance so what is the issue here, Lowell?”
After explaining, Jesus pondered for a moment.
“I may have a solution. Why not hold a contest? You both can switch holidays for this year and whoever does a better job gets to have their way.”
The bunny and leprechaun considered this.
“I do like the sound of that,” Graeme admitted. “What would be the terms?”
For once in this ordeal, it was Lowell’s turn to smile.
“I’m glad you asked. Whoever wins will have the date of their holiday remain as is.”
“What if we lose?” Arledge asked.
“Then the date of your holiday will be moved…To August!”
Even Jesus gasped at the brutality of these words. August wasn’t a month known for holidays aside from “National Such And Such Day”. However, it had no widely recognized holidays. The reason for this was something many people around the office came to call “The August Effect”. By then the Earth is at the extreme of both temperatures.
One side of the world is so scorching hot it makes people irritable and more prone to violence. Meanwhile, on the other, you have blizzards and icy roads. Both of these aren't ideal if say people want to hunt for eggs or search for leprechauns.
Although, staying at home would probably cause people to drink more.
“You’re out of your mind!” Graeme protested.
“Yeah, that's just sick!” Arledge added.
“Perhaps you two should have thought of that before you wrecked my office, again.”
Arledge and Graeme thought about disputing this but knew they were in too deep.
“Your success will be determined by the amount of holiday spirit you generate. I suggest you get started right away.”
The two of them left to prepare for their contest.
“So, who are you betting on?” Lowell asked Jesus.
“You know I am not a gambling man,” he replied, “but if I were…”
He gestured for Lowell to lean forward and he whispered something in his ear.
“Seriously?” Lowell said in shock.
Jesus gave a conspiratorial grin.
“God damn,” Lowell told him. “Oh, sorry.”
“Please, I got over that a long time ago.”
St. Patrick’s Day came.
“This will be a piece of cake,” Arledge thought. “What do I really need to do when I boil it down? Hide some gold? Run away from some kids? That leprechaun is going to be kissing March goodbye!”
His confidence dwindled when he received a message from Lowell on his phone.
“Don’t forget about the shoes.”
“This is no big deal. I can just make some from my eggs,” he said to himself.
This seemed like a good plan until he realized his eggs weren’t large enough for that which meant he’d have to make the shoes all by hand, or paw in this case. His first attempt resulted in leather scraps. The second was aesthetically pleasing until they fell apart after he picked them up. He had several million shoes to make. Needless to say, he was in over his ears.
Easter Sunday arrived.
“That stupid rabbit thinks he can beat me,” Garaeme thought. “Everyone knows that you never send a rodent to do a leprechaun’s job! All I have to do is paint some eggs then hide them and I’ll have this in the bag!”
He already had the eggs. All he would need to do is paint them. Luckily, he had some tricks up his sleeve. He threw some magic dust on the eggs. All of them turned green at once and he laughed in triumph.
He then noticed his right pocket was shining. From it, he pulled out a scroll. He unrolled it, revealing a message from Lowell. It wiped away any notion he had of an easy victory.
“Don’t forget that the eggs need to be different colors.”
He blinked and then glanced at the endless amount of eggs in his possession. It took a moment for the realization that he’d need to paint them all by hand to settle in.
“Fuck!”
Lowell stepped into his office on April 1st. He sidestepped the bucket of water that had been propped above his door. Then he used some scissors to cut the tripwire that would have left him tarred and feathered. He plucked the spike sticking up from his chair and tested its stability as well as if there was glue on it. When he was satisfied, he sat down.
He kept a mini fridge that he made sure to lock before he left. In it, he’d been keeping an Italian sub. He examined it, seeing it was still wrapped tight as he’d left it. He tore off the wrapping and bit into it only to be met with a mouthful of glue. He spat it out.
“I’m done for!” Arledge thought as he was walking to Lowell’s office.
St, Patrick’s Day had been a disaster for him. Not only did he fail miserably in shoe-making, the amount of alcohol he had to consume made his Italy incident seem tame. His only bit of luck was that the bullets had missed him. As he was having this crisis, he bumped into Graeme.
“Watch where you’re going, floppy-eared shit!”
Arledge knew if he showed any weakness it would be like blood in water.
“My bad, did I almost step on you?”
Graeme was ready to fight again but maintained his composure.
“You know what? I don’t need to waste my time with you because I’m winning for sure!”
“Does that mean Easter went well for you?”
Graeme thought back to how much his wrists ached from painting the eggs, most of which got broken in the process of him trying to hide them. Several times they were taken by an animal and once a bird snatched him off the ground. That made him cry for his mother and he struggled until he was dropped into a thorny bush. That had been a painful ordeal.
“It went great,” he replied. “How did things go with you? I bet it wasn’t so easy.”
“I’ll have you know I didn’t break a sweat, but that’s for Lowell to decide.”
In his office, they watched footage on Lowell’s TV of how they did. The embarrassment they felt was indescribable and both wished a giant hole would swallow them up.
“Games normally have one loser and one winner,” Lowell said, “but in this case, there are two losers.”
“What’s going to happen to us?” Graeme asked in a defeated voice.
“It may surprise you both to know that there is a concept called sharing.”
“Wait, so our holidays won't be moved to August?” Arledge said.
“No, they will remain as is.”
“What the hell?” Graeme snapped. “After all this shit, this damn bunny still gets his way!”
Lowell put up his hand and Graeme became silent.
“Not quite, I don't think moving your holidays would have solved anything anyway. What I think would be is if you two learned to put your differences aside. Therefore, you two will be helping each other on their respective holidays from now on.”
Arledge and Graeme exchanged a glance.
“You know, August might not be that bad,” Arledge said.
“It's too late. This decision is final. I suggest you begin working on getting along. Now, kindly get the hell out of my office.”
The bunny and leprechaun left, unsure of how their future would play out. Lowell got a candy bar that he’d kept in a hidden drawer. When he bit into it, he tasted dirt.
“I hate April Fool's Day.”
The moral of this story is most people don't know what the hell they're talking about so they should think before assuming. Otherwise, they may just end up embarrassed.
Author's Note: Happy St. Patrick's Day and early Easter I guess. Since this year they're both in the same month, I decided to lump them together into one story. If you enjoy it, consider checking out my other stories here, my articles here, and lastly, how you can support me here.
2024.01.10 23:12 Nurdok Obsessively memorizing song lyrics - is this echolalia?
I'm 34M. My 3 year old son was recently diagnosed with ASD and I've been feeling that a lot of autism traits apply to me, so I'm on this journey where I'm looking at a lot of weird things I do and thinking if it's autism related.
One thing that I've doing all my life is rewatching / relistening to movies and songs over and over again on repeat and almost obsessively memorizing the lyrics. I know this is common in kids to watch the same stuff over and over, but I never got over it. In recent years it's mostly been songs, though I really enjoy musicals so I tend to rewatch those over and over even today (like, for a few months, I would rewatch the beginning of "Come From Away" on my phone in the gym).
The way it happens usually is that I focus on a specific song for a few days, listening to it over and over and eventually I'll try to sing along. Once I start singing, I will aggressively start over if I make a mistake and I'll be a little upset with myself for getting it wrong. I also try to reproduce it perfectly, including slight intonation changes and it's very important to me to be precise when singing.
Ever since I became an adult with more private time I've been doing this more and more. Usually while driving alone. I also bought a shower bluetooth speaker so that's what I do in the shower too. Or when I do chores around the house. I could listen to the same song dozens of times a day while I actively practice at singing it.
Another aspect of this is that I do this and enjoy this more when the lyrics are hard. Like, I can do most of Hamilton start to finish by heart. I can't really sing well, so doing rap / hip hop where it's more spoken word feels much better because I feel like I can get it right. Lin-Manuel Miranda stuff is just the best for this. Tim Minchin also has great songs with really hard lyrics and I really need to "train" myself on performing them, including when to take strategic breaks to breathe, etc.
During the day when I'm not singing, I can easily get "triggered" by someone saying 2-3 words in a row that are part of some lyrics and I my brain immediately continues a song from that point in my head. This happens to me with movie / TV / sketch comedy quotes. I'm the type of person who makes a lot of references even when no one realizes it, because I autocomplete quotes that other people unknowingly started. Sometimes it makes sense in the context, but my internal urge to complete the quote happens even when the quote is irrelevant. Luckily I have a lot of really close friends who get me :)
Come to think of it, at a certain point in my life I would also pretty much memorize standup comedy, specifically George Carlin, and his specific style is very "poetic" and very intentional in the rhythm of how he speaks. When I look at YouTubers I really like (like those I donate to via Patreon), they all have sort of a poetic style with a lot of alliteration and very intentional scripted language.
When I hear these things, it's like it's scratching an itch in my brain and it feels really pleasant to hear and especially to say / sing out loud.
Anyway, this was very rambly. Could this be a form of echolalia? Do I just like to sing along or is this a bit too weird?
submitted by Nurdok to AutismTranslated [link] [comments]
One thing that I've doing all my life is rewatching / relistening to movies and songs over and over again on repeat and almost obsessively memorizing the lyrics. I know this is common in kids to watch the same stuff over and over, but I never got over it. In recent years it's mostly been songs, though I really enjoy musicals so I tend to rewatch those over and over even today (like, for a few months, I would rewatch the beginning of "Come From Away" on my phone in the gym).
The way it happens usually is that I focus on a specific song for a few days, listening to it over and over and eventually I'll try to sing along. Once I start singing, I will aggressively start over if I make a mistake and I'll be a little upset with myself for getting it wrong. I also try to reproduce it perfectly, including slight intonation changes and it's very important to me to be precise when singing.
Ever since I became an adult with more private time I've been doing this more and more. Usually while driving alone. I also bought a shower bluetooth speaker so that's what I do in the shower too. Or when I do chores around the house. I could listen to the same song dozens of times a day while I actively practice at singing it.
Another aspect of this is that I do this and enjoy this more when the lyrics are hard. Like, I can do most of Hamilton start to finish by heart. I can't really sing well, so doing rap / hip hop where it's more spoken word feels much better because I feel like I can get it right. Lin-Manuel Miranda stuff is just the best for this. Tim Minchin also has great songs with really hard lyrics and I really need to "train" myself on performing them, including when to take strategic breaks to breathe, etc.
During the day when I'm not singing, I can easily get "triggered" by someone saying 2-3 words in a row that are part of some lyrics and I my brain immediately continues a song from that point in my head. This happens to me with movie / TV / sketch comedy quotes. I'm the type of person who makes a lot of references even when no one realizes it, because I autocomplete quotes that other people unknowingly started. Sometimes it makes sense in the context, but my internal urge to complete the quote happens even when the quote is irrelevant. Luckily I have a lot of really close friends who get me :)
Come to think of it, at a certain point in my life I would also pretty much memorize standup comedy, specifically George Carlin, and his specific style is very "poetic" and very intentional in the rhythm of how he speaks. When I look at YouTubers I really like (like those I donate to via Patreon), they all have sort of a poetic style with a lot of alliteration and very intentional scripted language.
When I hear these things, it's like it's scratching an itch in my brain and it feels really pleasant to hear and especially to say / sing out loud.
Anyway, this was very rambly. Could this be a form of echolalia? Do I just like to sing along or is this a bit too weird?
2024.01.04 22:12 VitisIdaea 🛏️ Vote for our Book Club Selection: Just One Bed January 🛏️
It's time to select January’s Book Club read! We're doing a Trope-tastic 2024, and this month's trope is: Just One Bed. (Okay, it’s Only One Bed, but we’re embracing alliteration.)
We've narrowed it down to six contenders. Below are the books, links to their Goodreads pages, and information on where they're available (Kindle Unlimited, library databases, or Everand subscription). Please consider taking a look at availability before you vote to make sure you're going to be able to grab your choice in time to join the discussion!
Book Club discussions are hosted on Discord. Join the server here so you're ready to start chatting once the book's been chosen! Voting will close in 48 hours.
Voting posts for the book club for Forced Proximity February and Marriage of Convenience March will be going up soon, so keep your eyes peeled for more exciting book club news!
These are alphabetical by author.
{Cruising by Sean Ashcroft} - MM contemporary. Kindle Unlimited. Rowan didn't want to go on this Caribbean cruise—and he definitely didn't want to walk in on his hot, charming roommate—Lee—naked. But when Lee runs into the ex-boyfriend, the one who broke his heart, he tells a lie that leaves him stranded—he's here with the perfect boyfriend. Quiet, shy, reserved, and sweet, Rowan fits the bill and has his own reasons for wanting to help Lee out. Hot Caribbean nights, a cruise ship full of party boys out for a good time, sharing a bed, and pretending to date should be fine, right?
{How to Find a Princess by Alyssa Cole} - FF contemporary. Libby, Hoopla, audio on Everand. Makeda Hicks has lost her job and her girlfriend in one fell swoop... Yet when Beznaria Chetchevaliere crashes into her life, the sleek and sexy investigator exudes exactly the kind of chaos that organized and efficient Makeda finds irresistible, even if Bez is determined to drag her into a world of royal duty Makeda wants nothing to do with. When a threat to her grandmother’s livelihood pushes Makeda to agree to return to Ibarania, Bez takes her on a transatlantic adventure with a crew of lovable weirdos, a fake marriage, and one-bed hijinks on the high seas. When they finally make it to Ibarania, they realize there’s more at stake than just cash and crown, and Makeda must learn what it means to fight for what she desires and not what she feels bound to by duty.
{What the Hex by Alexis Daria} - MF paranormal. Libby, Hoopla, Everand. When Catalina Cartagena returns home for her older sister’s wedding, she’s shocked to discover that her soon-to-be brother in law is possessed by a demon. To make matters worse, everyone else seems to be under the demon’s spell—except for Diego Paz, younger brother of the groom and Cat’s childhood rival. With only three days until the wedding, Cat must join forces with her sexy nemesis to break the spell and defeat the demon. If they fail, demonic forces will control two of the most powerful witch families on Isla Bruja. There’s only one bed at the magical B&B, and it’s time for these witches to get wicked…in more ways than one.
{To Catch a Raven by Beverly Jenkins} - MF historical. Libby, Hoopla, audio on Everand. Lying and cheating may be sins to some people, but for Raven Moreaux, it is a way of life. She comes from a long line of grifters and couldn’t be prouder…Until she’s forced to help the government. A former Confederate official is suspected of stealing the Declaration of Independence, and Raven, posing as his housekeeper, is tasked with getting it back. Her partner is the too handsome Braxton Steel. Masquerading as a valet/driver, Brax is also supposed to be her “husband.” He has his own reasons for doing this job, but when their pretend marriage ignites into fiery passion, they’ll have to put everything—including their hearts—on the line.
{Going Public by Hudson Lin} - MM contemporary. Libby, Hoopla, audio on Everand. As an operating partner at Jade Harbour, Raymond Chao prides himself in fixing even the most disastrous of portfolio companies—no matter the cost... Elvin Goh has been Raymond's assistant for years, and he's been in love with the charming, ruthless playboy for just as long. There's very little that Elvin won't do—or hasn't done—for Raymond. Impossible crush aside, it's his job... When long nights in the office lead to whispered confessions and a newfound intimacy, it seems like a dream come true—for both of them. But with the prospect of failure on the horizon, can this dream team beat the odds and come out the victors in the office and in their hearts?
{Missed Connection by Stephanie Shea} - FF contemporary. Kindle Unlimited. Avery Dimaano is good at most things. No, she’s better... There’s only one problem, she has no one to spend her weekends with. Travel influencer Ky Logan doesn’t play by anyone else’s rules. Her life of jet-hopping across the world is the envy of two million followers, even if her family doesn’t exactly approve... Six months after her trip to Sydney, Ky still can’t stop thinking about the woman she sat next to on the plane. Avery. Beautiful, clever, straight Avery. When a leak in Avery’s apartment leads them to share a bed for two weeks, lines inevitably become blurred, especially after the kiss they shared in San Francisco International. Maybe Ky is the person Avery has been waiting for, even if she’s never considered being with a woman. But is Ky’s time with Avery just another one of her vacations?
View Poll
submitted by VitisIdaea to RomanceBooks [link] [comments]
We've narrowed it down to six contenders. Below are the books, links to their Goodreads pages, and information on where they're available (Kindle Unlimited, library databases, or Everand subscription). Please consider taking a look at availability before you vote to make sure you're going to be able to grab your choice in time to join the discussion!
Book Club discussions are hosted on Discord. Join the server here so you're ready to start chatting once the book's been chosen! Voting will close in 48 hours.
Voting posts for the book club for Forced Proximity February and Marriage of Convenience March will be going up soon, so keep your eyes peeled for more exciting book club news!
These are alphabetical by author.
{Cruising by Sean Ashcroft} - MM contemporary. Kindle Unlimited. Rowan didn't want to go on this Caribbean cruise—and he definitely didn't want to walk in on his hot, charming roommate—Lee—naked. But when Lee runs into the ex-boyfriend, the one who broke his heart, he tells a lie that leaves him stranded—he's here with the perfect boyfriend. Quiet, shy, reserved, and sweet, Rowan fits the bill and has his own reasons for wanting to help Lee out. Hot Caribbean nights, a cruise ship full of party boys out for a good time, sharing a bed, and pretending to date should be fine, right?
{How to Find a Princess by Alyssa Cole} - FF contemporary. Libby, Hoopla, audio on Everand. Makeda Hicks has lost her job and her girlfriend in one fell swoop... Yet when Beznaria Chetchevaliere crashes into her life, the sleek and sexy investigator exudes exactly the kind of chaos that organized and efficient Makeda finds irresistible, even if Bez is determined to drag her into a world of royal duty Makeda wants nothing to do with. When a threat to her grandmother’s livelihood pushes Makeda to agree to return to Ibarania, Bez takes her on a transatlantic adventure with a crew of lovable weirdos, a fake marriage, and one-bed hijinks on the high seas. When they finally make it to Ibarania, they realize there’s more at stake than just cash and crown, and Makeda must learn what it means to fight for what she desires and not what she feels bound to by duty.
{What the Hex by Alexis Daria} - MF paranormal. Libby, Hoopla, Everand. When Catalina Cartagena returns home for her older sister’s wedding, she’s shocked to discover that her soon-to-be brother in law is possessed by a demon. To make matters worse, everyone else seems to be under the demon’s spell—except for Diego Paz, younger brother of the groom and Cat’s childhood rival. With only three days until the wedding, Cat must join forces with her sexy nemesis to break the spell and defeat the demon. If they fail, demonic forces will control two of the most powerful witch families on Isla Bruja. There’s only one bed at the magical B&B, and it’s time for these witches to get wicked…in more ways than one.
{To Catch a Raven by Beverly Jenkins} - MF historical. Libby, Hoopla, audio on Everand. Lying and cheating may be sins to some people, but for Raven Moreaux, it is a way of life. She comes from a long line of grifters and couldn’t be prouder…Until she’s forced to help the government. A former Confederate official is suspected of stealing the Declaration of Independence, and Raven, posing as his housekeeper, is tasked with getting it back. Her partner is the too handsome Braxton Steel. Masquerading as a valet/driver, Brax is also supposed to be her “husband.” He has his own reasons for doing this job, but when their pretend marriage ignites into fiery passion, they’ll have to put everything—including their hearts—on the line.
{Going Public by Hudson Lin} - MM contemporary. Libby, Hoopla, audio on Everand. As an operating partner at Jade Harbour, Raymond Chao prides himself in fixing even the most disastrous of portfolio companies—no matter the cost... Elvin Goh has been Raymond's assistant for years, and he's been in love with the charming, ruthless playboy for just as long. There's very little that Elvin won't do—or hasn't done—for Raymond. Impossible crush aside, it's his job... When long nights in the office lead to whispered confessions and a newfound intimacy, it seems like a dream come true—for both of them. But with the prospect of failure on the horizon, can this dream team beat the odds and come out the victors in the office and in their hearts?
{Missed Connection by Stephanie Shea} - FF contemporary. Kindle Unlimited. Avery Dimaano is good at most things. No, she’s better... There’s only one problem, she has no one to spend her weekends with. Travel influencer Ky Logan doesn’t play by anyone else’s rules. Her life of jet-hopping across the world is the envy of two million followers, even if her family doesn’t exactly approve... Six months after her trip to Sydney, Ky still can’t stop thinking about the woman she sat next to on the plane. Avery. Beautiful, clever, straight Avery. When a leak in Avery’s apartment leads them to share a bed for two weeks, lines inevitably become blurred, especially after the kiss they shared in San Francisco International. Maybe Ky is the person Avery has been waiting for, even if she’s never considered being with a woman. But is Ky’s time with Avery just another one of her vacations?
View Poll
2023.11.30 20:10 TheFInestHemlock Meltdown story and how to cope?
Hey all, I'm putting the tl;dr here because this is a long one. Basically I think I had a meltdown, but I'm not top sure that it aligns with the "stereotypical" ones. Hopefully some can relate and maybe we can help each other with how to cope leading up to and in the aftermath of them. Anyways, here it goes:
I was diagnosed with autism lvl 1 support needs this year, at 29. Living my whole life by masking pretty hard, apparently.
The week or two leading up to this event was filled with my in-laws visiting. While I appreciate their willingness to help in many situations, their existence is the antithesis of calm, calculated and steady. Daily conversation between them could often be mistaken as shouting matches, and they seem to incorporate someone else's home as their own, as if to really follow the mantra “mi casa es su casa” verbatim, though that mantra was never spoken in the first place.
My job can be pretty stressful as well. Usually I get a small amount of time after the kids are asleep to decompress and try and regroup myself before going to bed and starting the cycle over again, but having a group this chaotic stay in my home didn't give me much opportunity to do so between things they wanted to do and me trying to do the best I could to help my wife manage everything.
I had been feeling more anxious as the days passed, my eye began twitching, which I've noticed only happens when I'm quite stressed. I began to be more direct in my speech, I noticed my wife getting pulled into the frenzy that her family exuded. As time went on I felt the foundations that we worked hard to set were being picked away at by the constant and tumultuous instances of haphazardness.
Three days ago I noticed I was crying more to songs on my drive to work. I always thought I was just overly emotional, but now I suspect it has something to do with stress or overstimulation? Not sure. These are not sad songs, mind you, these are things like rap songs or jpop/vtuber music, etc. I very much like the alliteration and rhyme schemes of a lot of rap and hip hop, along with the consistent yet melodic beats. However, on my commutes this week I have not been able to follow along without getting choked up and having tears well up in my eyes.
Two days ago I finally started feeling overwhelmed to the point of no return. I knew it was only a matter of time, sitting at my desk at work, before I was going to need to run outside or try and find an empty quiet place to lose my mind at. I don't think any main sensory issues became a big bother to me, but the crushing weight of mental burden just built up like cosmic static in my mind. When I was a teenager I used to have what I think were meltdowns that wound up with me screaming, potentially kicking things, etc. In growing, I found to channel that as best I could into just, uncontrollable fits of crying. I was afraid, if at any moment, anyone noticed I had tears building from the waves of emotion that were hitting the back of my eyes, it would have been game over for me. I've had plenty of times in the past where someone noticed at that moment and asked directly at me if I was alright. It was like they were looking right into my soul at the time and pierced the levy with their gaze, letting loose all of the emotions I was holding and I'd turn into a blubbering mess. Somehow, I managed to request the rest of the day off and had gotten the go ahead from my manager to leave. I left.
I couldn't go home because my in-laws were still there. So I drove 5 minutes to the mall parking lot where I knew I could park and be alone and put on a song Playlist that has always worked as a good release valve for me when things get too built up. Plus I had Barnes and noble right there so, if I made it out the other end as some semblance of a person I could try and get a Manga volume that I like so very much.
I didn't make it to the parking lot before I been to cry so hard that I could nearly drive. The dam started breaking. Like contractions before a birth it would come in strong and recede, giving me enough time to safely park and sit and wait for the coup de grace to arrive. And arrive it did. Sad wailing, utterances I'd be embarrassed to even have my wife hear came from me as panic hit me with surges of adrenaline that, more than anything else, have cured my imposter syndrome about my diagnosis. My music played as I buried my head in my steering wheel while people drove by, hoping I wouldn't be stared at like the wounded animal I felt I was.
Minutes passed, I felt exhausted, my head and psyche were empty. Eyes puffy, I sat in silence as the lower side of my hands started to tingle like they had pens and needles. I remember my first emotions coming back. Anger, I wanted to call my dad immediately and tell him that my sister has this too. She should have been diagnosed. But she's younger than me and has other cognitive issues so she can't articulate herself. When she has “tantrums” as my dad calls them, I can recognize the same bleak, gutteral, heart-wrenching, painful utterances that I've had time and time again. Have to speak with him more about this when I've fully returned to normalcy.
After all that I managed to pull myself together and go and get myself a volume of that Manga, I felt empty, but the cover art was a comforting sight. I knew overall this would help me even if I had to interact with the cashier to bring it home. The drive back was rather uneventful. No thoughts crossed my mind except to get home. I was on autopilot. I just wanted to curl up somewhere. I didn't want to have to interact with anyone that I didn't have to. Making it home, I whisped myself away to my office where people rarely bother me unless needed. I was able to sit and watch some streams and just try and do anything I thought would help me get back to normal. Nothing really worked. I guess time is the only thing that does, but idk. I'm back at work now, I feel like I need a vacation despite having to take off for an illness not too long ago. With my in-laws leaving I may take one day to try and rest, but on the bright side my director says I've “been killing it” this morning, so I suppose I have that going for me.
I guess I needed to get this off my chest, but also I had some questions. Namely can anyone relate to my experiences? I don't get too overstimulated until I'm not able to live how I set my daily life up to be, I guess? I never thought most sensory things bothered me to the point of meltdown, but could internal/emotional pressures or cognitive overload cause meltdowns? Was this a meltdown or a shutdown or something else? And what things help you guys through after these events? I've started making a list of things I like, don't like and signs of stress that I hope to put to good use in the future for myself and my wife to acknowledge, but other than that I'm open to suggestions.
Thank you for reading and sorry for the very long post.
submitted by TheFInestHemlock to AutisticAdults [link] [comments]
I was diagnosed with autism lvl 1 support needs this year, at 29. Living my whole life by masking pretty hard, apparently.
The week or two leading up to this event was filled with my in-laws visiting. While I appreciate their willingness to help in many situations, their existence is the antithesis of calm, calculated and steady. Daily conversation between them could often be mistaken as shouting matches, and they seem to incorporate someone else's home as their own, as if to really follow the mantra “mi casa es su casa” verbatim, though that mantra was never spoken in the first place.
My job can be pretty stressful as well. Usually I get a small amount of time after the kids are asleep to decompress and try and regroup myself before going to bed and starting the cycle over again, but having a group this chaotic stay in my home didn't give me much opportunity to do so between things they wanted to do and me trying to do the best I could to help my wife manage everything.
I had been feeling more anxious as the days passed, my eye began twitching, which I've noticed only happens when I'm quite stressed. I began to be more direct in my speech, I noticed my wife getting pulled into the frenzy that her family exuded. As time went on I felt the foundations that we worked hard to set were being picked away at by the constant and tumultuous instances of haphazardness.
Three days ago I noticed I was crying more to songs on my drive to work. I always thought I was just overly emotional, but now I suspect it has something to do with stress or overstimulation? Not sure. These are not sad songs, mind you, these are things like rap songs or jpop/vtuber music, etc. I very much like the alliteration and rhyme schemes of a lot of rap and hip hop, along with the consistent yet melodic beats. However, on my commutes this week I have not been able to follow along without getting choked up and having tears well up in my eyes.
Two days ago I finally started feeling overwhelmed to the point of no return. I knew it was only a matter of time, sitting at my desk at work, before I was going to need to run outside or try and find an empty quiet place to lose my mind at. I don't think any main sensory issues became a big bother to me, but the crushing weight of mental burden just built up like cosmic static in my mind. When I was a teenager I used to have what I think were meltdowns that wound up with me screaming, potentially kicking things, etc. In growing, I found to channel that as best I could into just, uncontrollable fits of crying. I was afraid, if at any moment, anyone noticed I had tears building from the waves of emotion that were hitting the back of my eyes, it would have been game over for me. I've had plenty of times in the past where someone noticed at that moment and asked directly at me if I was alright. It was like they were looking right into my soul at the time and pierced the levy with their gaze, letting loose all of the emotions I was holding and I'd turn into a blubbering mess. Somehow, I managed to request the rest of the day off and had gotten the go ahead from my manager to leave. I left.
I couldn't go home because my in-laws were still there. So I drove 5 minutes to the mall parking lot where I knew I could park and be alone and put on a song Playlist that has always worked as a good release valve for me when things get too built up. Plus I had Barnes and noble right there so, if I made it out the other end as some semblance of a person I could try and get a Manga volume that I like so very much.
I didn't make it to the parking lot before I been to cry so hard that I could nearly drive. The dam started breaking. Like contractions before a birth it would come in strong and recede, giving me enough time to safely park and sit and wait for the coup de grace to arrive. And arrive it did. Sad wailing, utterances I'd be embarrassed to even have my wife hear came from me as panic hit me with surges of adrenaline that, more than anything else, have cured my imposter syndrome about my diagnosis. My music played as I buried my head in my steering wheel while people drove by, hoping I wouldn't be stared at like the wounded animal I felt I was.
Minutes passed, I felt exhausted, my head and psyche were empty. Eyes puffy, I sat in silence as the lower side of my hands started to tingle like they had pens and needles. I remember my first emotions coming back. Anger, I wanted to call my dad immediately and tell him that my sister has this too. She should have been diagnosed. But she's younger than me and has other cognitive issues so she can't articulate herself. When she has “tantrums” as my dad calls them, I can recognize the same bleak, gutteral, heart-wrenching, painful utterances that I've had time and time again. Have to speak with him more about this when I've fully returned to normalcy.
After all that I managed to pull myself together and go and get myself a volume of that Manga, I felt empty, but the cover art was a comforting sight. I knew overall this would help me even if I had to interact with the cashier to bring it home. The drive back was rather uneventful. No thoughts crossed my mind except to get home. I was on autopilot. I just wanted to curl up somewhere. I didn't want to have to interact with anyone that I didn't have to. Making it home, I whisped myself away to my office where people rarely bother me unless needed. I was able to sit and watch some streams and just try and do anything I thought would help me get back to normal. Nothing really worked. I guess time is the only thing that does, but idk. I'm back at work now, I feel like I need a vacation despite having to take off for an illness not too long ago. With my in-laws leaving I may take one day to try and rest, but on the bright side my director says I've “been killing it” this morning, so I suppose I have that going for me.
I guess I needed to get this off my chest, but also I had some questions. Namely can anyone relate to my experiences? I don't get too overstimulated until I'm not able to live how I set my daily life up to be, I guess? I never thought most sensory things bothered me to the point of meltdown, but could internal/emotional pressures or cognitive overload cause meltdowns? Was this a meltdown or a shutdown or something else? And what things help you guys through after these events? I've started making a list of things I like, don't like and signs of stress that I hope to put to good use in the future for myself and my wife to acknowledge, but other than that I'm open to suggestions.
Thank you for reading and sorry for the very long post.
2023.11.03 01:12 KnightGabriel My personal rankings of the recent Freshy Kanal "Ghost Cypher"
First off, I don't want to downplay any of them, everyone killed it and had at least one special thing going for them. Also this is mostly my opinion, I'm completely fine if there's someone you would rank higher or lower. I'm putting this in order of worst to best(also I'm not ranking the narratointro)
#10 - Danny Phantom The second ghost and imo definitely the worst of them(but again, he was still good). Many lines(primarily at the start of his verse) were somewhat cringeworthy and his actor sounds unenthusiastic throughout the whole thing, he just didn't have a lot of energy. However, he did eventually start to pick up partway through the verse. I also liked how near the end of his verse the beat started to seemingly slowly change to the next rapper's beat(who will be appearing later. MUCH later).
#9 - Ghostrider 9th ghost, similar situation above, some lines just felt cheesy/cringeworthy, and he only really started to pick up later in his verse. In addition the "stuttering" part would've been SO MUCH better if it was an alliteration or it rhymed more imo. However, he did at least get into character better and brought more energy than Danny, and I also just think he was slightly better overall.
#8 - Bloody Mary 4th ghost. There's a much bigger difference between her and Ghostrider than there is between Ghostrider and Danny Phantom, don't get me wrong, I just kinda had to put her here by definition since the others I just liked better, even if just by a tiny bit. I liked some of the build-up(although there wasn't much) in her verse and the "bloody mary x3 boo!" part the most. However, I wasn't the biggest fan of the animation style and Ig some parts I just wasn't really feeling.
#7 - Sadako 8th ghost. I like the short singing part for the introduction to her verse that's done in japanese, and it's also impressive how she managed to do the entire rap verse in a whisper voice and still sound great. Like many of the ghosts in this cypher she started to pick up the pace partway through her verse, but her start wasn' t bad either, she basically jumped in from the singing part. But other than those things nothing really stood out to me? Idk both her and Blody Mary were difficult for me to rank for some reason.
#6 - Slimer 6th ghost. Compared to some of the darker verses, this one was somewhat upbeat and very catchy imo. Again, loved the voice, and I also loved the beat and how they incorporated some parts of the ghostbusters theme. Imo his verse was simplistic and just nice to listen too, didn't really have any crazy wordplay, just really good, front and foremost.
#5 - King Boo 1st ghost, a very solid start to the song. Like most of the participants, he(again) started out slow, but picked up the pace later, and I liked his voice. He also had some IMPECCABLE flow, imo the best of all of them. Other than the flow he was kind of a jack-of-all-trades, since he offered a decent amount of everything if you ask me(had both a fast and slow part, several solid punchlines/wordplay, and a good rhyme scheme).
#4 - Casper 5th ghost. Casper was voiced and written by Littleflecks, ofc he was gonna get a spot in the top 5, every single freshy kanal verse he's done was complete fire with wordplay, punchlines, and rhymes galore. I liked the whispering part and the way it built up to the more upbeat part. His flow was great and he had an intricate rhyme scheme, and was pretty consistent all around.
#3 - Headless Horseman The way he started with something that I can only describe as a medieval-themed ballad or poem that's similar to the introduction and then transitioned into a UK drill beat(or grime idk, not really well-versed in UK hip-hop) with an amazing fast-paced, but not too fast flow, and he just sounded amazing in general because of that combined with his accent.
#2 - Gengar 10th and final ghost. Obviously not quite the "best for last" as he says, but he sure comes really damn close(and in my friend's opinion he is the best one). This guy was voiced by Cam Steady, which honestly shocked me, because he's appeared on Freshy before and I've listened to most of those battles, none of his characters had a style even kinda similar to his style for Gengar in this battle. As for the style, I would describe it as something like rap metal, most parts of his verse he does screaming or just in a loud tone, and is both very fast-paced and has a lot of build-up. His closing part gets even more intense as he starts screaming at the top of his fucking lungs and somehow manages to go even harder than he already was. Great finisher.
#1 - The Flying Dutchman I don't even watch Spongebob and didn't even know this guy was a Spongebob character at first(When I looked up "The Flying Dutchman" it isntead showed me things about the mythical ghost ship of the exact same name that most likely inspired said spongebob character), and his part is still easily my favorite of them all. That amazing beat with accordions is not only insanely catchy but it fits the pirate theme, and just the sheer ENERGY that TFD's actor brought was unparalleled. He was consistent throughout and he just WENT. SO. HARD. Over the past few days I've been constantly replaying his part alone, that's how good it is. Literally one of the best rap verses I've heard, period, rap battle or no rap battle, animated or not animated.
Alright yeah that's it. Feel free to put your own opinions in the comments and why you think that. I'm not gonna judge others for their preference.
submitted by KnightGabriel to ERB [link] [comments]
#10 - Danny Phantom The second ghost and imo definitely the worst of them(but again, he was still good). Many lines(primarily at the start of his verse) were somewhat cringeworthy and his actor sounds unenthusiastic throughout the whole thing, he just didn't have a lot of energy. However, he did eventually start to pick up partway through the verse. I also liked how near the end of his verse the beat started to seemingly slowly change to the next rapper's beat(who will be appearing later. MUCH later).
#9 - Ghostrider 9th ghost, similar situation above, some lines just felt cheesy/cringeworthy, and he only really started to pick up later in his verse. In addition the "stuttering" part would've been SO MUCH better if it was an alliteration or it rhymed more imo. However, he did at least get into character better and brought more energy than Danny, and I also just think he was slightly better overall.
#8 - Bloody Mary 4th ghost. There's a much bigger difference between her and Ghostrider than there is between Ghostrider and Danny Phantom, don't get me wrong, I just kinda had to put her here by definition since the others I just liked better, even if just by a tiny bit. I liked some of the build-up(although there wasn't much) in her verse and the "bloody mary x3 boo!" part the most. However, I wasn't the biggest fan of the animation style and Ig some parts I just wasn't really feeling.
#7 - Sadako 8th ghost. I like the short singing part for the introduction to her verse that's done in japanese, and it's also impressive how she managed to do the entire rap verse in a whisper voice and still sound great. Like many of the ghosts in this cypher she started to pick up the pace partway through her verse, but her start wasn' t bad either, she basically jumped in from the singing part. But other than those things nothing really stood out to me? Idk both her and Blody Mary were difficult for me to rank for some reason.
#6 - Slimer 6th ghost. Compared to some of the darker verses, this one was somewhat upbeat and very catchy imo. Again, loved the voice, and I also loved the beat and how they incorporated some parts of the ghostbusters theme. Imo his verse was simplistic and just nice to listen too, didn't really have any crazy wordplay, just really good, front and foremost.
#5 - King Boo 1st ghost, a very solid start to the song. Like most of the participants, he(again) started out slow, but picked up the pace later, and I liked his voice. He also had some IMPECCABLE flow, imo the best of all of them. Other than the flow he was kind of a jack-of-all-trades, since he offered a decent amount of everything if you ask me(had both a fast and slow part, several solid punchlines/wordplay, and a good rhyme scheme).
#4 - Casper 5th ghost. Casper was voiced and written by Littleflecks, ofc he was gonna get a spot in the top 5, every single freshy kanal verse he's done was complete fire with wordplay, punchlines, and rhymes galore. I liked the whispering part and the way it built up to the more upbeat part. His flow was great and he had an intricate rhyme scheme, and was pretty consistent all around.
#3 - Headless Horseman The way he started with something that I can only describe as a medieval-themed ballad or poem that's similar to the introduction and then transitioned into a UK drill beat(or grime idk, not really well-versed in UK hip-hop) with an amazing fast-paced, but not too fast flow, and he just sounded amazing in general because of that combined with his accent.
#2 - Gengar 10th and final ghost. Obviously not quite the "best for last" as he says, but he sure comes really damn close(and in my friend's opinion he is the best one). This guy was voiced by Cam Steady, which honestly shocked me, because he's appeared on Freshy before and I've listened to most of those battles, none of his characters had a style even kinda similar to his style for Gengar in this battle. As for the style, I would describe it as something like rap metal, most parts of his verse he does screaming or just in a loud tone, and is both very fast-paced and has a lot of build-up. His closing part gets even more intense as he starts screaming at the top of his fucking lungs and somehow manages to go even harder than he already was. Great finisher.
#1 - The Flying Dutchman I don't even watch Spongebob and didn't even know this guy was a Spongebob character at first(When I looked up "The Flying Dutchman" it isntead showed me things about the mythical ghost ship of the exact same name that most likely inspired said spongebob character), and his part is still easily my favorite of them all. That amazing beat with accordions is not only insanely catchy but it fits the pirate theme, and just the sheer ENERGY that TFD's actor brought was unparalleled. He was consistent throughout and he just WENT. SO. HARD. Over the past few days I've been constantly replaying his part alone, that's how good it is. Literally one of the best rap verses I've heard, period, rap battle or no rap battle, animated or not animated.
Alright yeah that's it. Feel free to put your own opinions in the comments and why you think that. I'm not gonna judge others for their preference.
2023.09.20 03:59 DaveW626 Pet name origins
KittyKitty (black & white cat) was my very first cat I had as a child. 1983-2001.
Amanda the unicorn after a former co-worker.
Beau the tuxedo cat because there used to be a store called Beau's.
Billie the Billy Goat.
Charlotte the flamingo WWE
Donald the Mallard NCIS
Heinie (short for Heinrich) the parakeet after a bird I owned as a kid. He and Kitty Kitty did not get along. LOL
Hoppy the lop bunny
Kelly the Kiwi because of the alliteration
Larry the crocodile Pearls Before Swine comic strip
Lawrence the Arabian horse.
Maddie named after my best friend's dog who sadly passed away earlier this year.
Nemo the goldfish. From the movie.
Penny the Decade dragon. Money correlation.
Smokey the black Bear. Only you can prevent forest fires.
Snoopy the Beagle from the Peanuts comic strip.
Snowy the Snowy Retriever Puppy
Sugar the color block kitty named after my current cat (IRL she's all black).
The EB Hopping Bunny after the Easter Bunny.
Tye the Tye dyed dog
and Wally the walrus.
Some of these names are unoriginal, possibly clever idk but all hold a special meaning to me.
submitted by DaveW626 to Webkinz [link] [comments]
Amanda the unicorn after a former co-worker.
Beau the tuxedo cat because there used to be a store called Beau's.
Billie the Billy Goat.
Charlotte the flamingo WWE
Donald the Mallard NCIS
Heinie (short for Heinrich) the parakeet after a bird I owned as a kid. He and Kitty Kitty did not get along. LOL
Hoppy the lop bunny
Kelly the Kiwi because of the alliteration
Larry the crocodile Pearls Before Swine comic strip
Lawrence the Arabian horse.
Maddie named after my best friend's dog who sadly passed away earlier this year.
Nemo the goldfish. From the movie.
Penny the Decade dragon. Money correlation.
Smokey the black Bear. Only you can prevent forest fires.
Snoopy the Beagle from the Peanuts comic strip.
Snowy the Snowy Retriever Puppy
Sugar the color block kitty named after my current cat (IRL she's all black).
The EB Hopping Bunny after the Easter Bunny.
Tye the Tye dyed dog
and Wally the walrus.
Some of these names are unoriginal, possibly clever idk but all hold a special meaning to me.
2023.09.03 11:03 FyrenofTelios Cycle 430: Green bugs in more than one way
Cycles summary:
These past couple cycles have once again been rather quiet on the side of Powerplay that usually makes it to these recaps, although I am quite sorry for missing yet another week.
No matter though! This past fortnight saw us steadily hold the fortification line, and I extend a sincere thank-you to everyone who contributed to keeping Winters safe - especially those of you who show up every week with merits in the thousands, you know who you are and you’re absolutely invaluable.
If you want your forts to go where it matters most, do hop on to our Discord server, you might find it quite cozy (and and also handy) in this cold and empty galaxy.
Another front whose objectives are only available on that platform is BGS, where we continued to weather our onslaught of opposition - although we did manage to mount a few sorties from the typical trench warfare of these past months, and our latest handful of scuffles have been soundly successful... so if you want to help us drive that wedge deeper into Imp positions, you know where to go!
Finally, our efforts against Flowey’s fam were mostly focused on thwarting alerts around our buddy Li’s magnificent and poetically-numbered HIPs.
In other news…
For those of you too focused on market prices or hardpoint convergence to notice, a couple stories have been unfolding in the galaxy’s best (and worst, and only) news network. The Federation’s clown could turn out to be a pirate, writes Galnet in an alliteration; the Bubble’s biggest reality TV series has launched and succeeded making solid platinum statues of themselves (uh, congrats? I guess?); and bugs have seen both rapid retreat from scientific study sites as well as now-confirmed revolutionary “Carbon (Life-form) Capture & Storage” technology. Who knew the Thargoids were just trying to limit the effects of humans on galactic climate change all along!
Voting:
Are you able to vote for Winters? Please vote CONS and vote EARLY.
Fortification:
Please do not Fortify any systems at this time. Priorities are ever changing and we cannot update publicly in a timely manner.
Expansion:
None at this time.
Undermining:
Crickets -
Interested in AX? Join FAX-COM.
Interested in non-violent methods to assuage the alien emergency? Winters has a place for you too.
Interested in PvP? PvP is one of Powerplay’s lifebloods. We train interested pilots with a dedicated server, resources and mentors, and weekly in-house tournaments
Interested in exploration? We have a server for our explorers too
Want, uh, objectives (!), to wing up, or to keep up to date on the ever-evolving strategy? Join our Discord! Stop by and say hello - or to stay quiet and beaver away at your speciality. In addition to Powerplay Ops, we have channels for general ED discussion, ship building mastery, and PvP training, with domain experts. We also have an unsurpassed cantina.
Diplomatic Overview:
Aisling Duval – Princess
Archon Delaine – Friendly
Arissa Lavigny-Duval – Rival
Denton Patreus – Rival
Edmund Mahon – the Bubble’s big green hat
Li Yong-Rui – his HIPs don’t lie
Pranav Antal – Dreamy~
Yuri Grom – Rival
Zachary Hudson– Ally
Zemina Torval – Rival
submitted by FyrenofTelios to EliteWinters [link] [comments]
These past couple cycles have once again been rather quiet on the side of Powerplay that usually makes it to these recaps, although I am quite sorry for missing yet another week.
No matter though! This past fortnight saw us steadily hold the fortification line, and I extend a sincere thank-you to everyone who contributed to keeping Winters safe - especially those of you who show up every week with merits in the thousands, you know who you are and you’re absolutely invaluable.
If you want your forts to go where it matters most, do hop on to our Discord server, you might find it quite cozy (and and also handy) in this cold and empty galaxy.
Another front whose objectives are only available on that platform is BGS, where we continued to weather our onslaught of opposition - although we did manage to mount a few sorties from the typical trench warfare of these past months, and our latest handful of scuffles have been soundly successful... so if you want to help us drive that wedge deeper into Imp positions, you know where to go!
Finally, our efforts against Flowey’s fam were mostly focused on thwarting alerts around our buddy Li’s magnificent and poetically-numbered HIPs.
In other news…
For those of you too focused on market prices or hardpoint convergence to notice, a couple stories have been unfolding in the galaxy’s best (and worst, and only) news network. The Federation’s clown could turn out to be a pirate, writes Galnet in an alliteration; the Bubble’s biggest reality TV series has launched and succeeded making solid platinum statues of themselves (uh, congrats? I guess?); and bugs have seen both rapid retreat from scientific study sites as well as now-confirmed revolutionary “Carbon (Life-form) Capture & Storage” technology. Who knew the Thargoids were just trying to limit the effects of humans on galactic climate change all along!
Voting:
Are you able to vote for Winters? Please vote CONS and vote EARLY.
Fortification:
Please do not Fortify any systems at this time. Priorities are ever changing and we cannot update publicly in a timely manner.
Expansion:
None at this time.
Undermining:
Crickets -
Interested in AX? Join FAX-COM.
Interested in non-violent methods to assuage the alien emergency? Winters has a place for you too.
Interested in PvP? PvP is one of Powerplay’s lifebloods. We train interested pilots with a dedicated server, resources and mentors, and weekly in-house tournaments
Interested in exploration? We have a server for our explorers too
Want, uh, objectives (!), to wing up, or to keep up to date on the ever-evolving strategy? Join our Discord! Stop by and say hello - or to stay quiet and beaver away at your speciality. In addition to Powerplay Ops, we have channels for general ED discussion, ship building mastery, and PvP training, with domain experts. We also have an unsurpassed cantina
Diplomatic Overview:
Aisling Duval – Princess
Archon Delaine – Friendly
Arissa Lavigny-Duval – Rival
Denton Patreus – Rival
Edmund Mahon – the Bubble’s big green hat
Li Yong-Rui – his HIPs don’t lie
Pranav Antal – Dreamy~
Yuri Grom – Rival
Zachary Hudson– Ally
Zemina Torval – Rival
2023.08.31 15:05 NYCIndieConcerts September 2023 Shows
Mid-Month update: This post hit Reddit's max character limit when first made. In order to update this post with new additions, past shows have been removed, but are archived in the comments.
last updated 9/18 11:20
submitted by NYCIndieConcerts to u/NYCIndieConcerts [link] [comments]
Friday September 8
| VENUE | TIME / DOOR PRICE | EVENT / LINE-UP |
|---|---|---|
| ALPHAVILLE | 9pm, $15 | Pons + Joudy + Pop Music Fever Dream + Shop Talk |
| Bowery Ballroom | 9pm, $35 | Luna + waveform* |
| The Broadway | 9pm, $15 | Ringing + Slughead + Plastic + Crate |
| The Brooklyn Monarch | 6pm, SOLD OUT | Gorilla Biscuits + H2O + Crime In Stereo + End It + standstill |
| Elsewhere - The Hall | 8:30pm, $40 | Kula Shaker + Native Sun |
| **Forest Hills Stadium | 7pm, SOLD OUT | Arctic Monkeys + Fontaines D.C. |
| Hart Bar | 8pm, $10 | Awful Din + No One & the Somebodies + Alliteration |
| Madison Square Garden | 7:30pm, $300+ | Eagles The Long Goodbye tour + Steely Dan |
| **Public Records | 8pm, $20 | Johnny Dynamite & the Bloodsuckersrecord release show + Korine + Cameron Castan |
| Radio City Music Hall | 7:30pm, $50+ | Squeeze + The Psychedelic Furs |
| Rubulad | 8pm, $15 | Mary Shelley + Moonunitt + The Plebs + Telescope Club |
| Terminal 5 | 8pm, $50 | Mr. Bungle + Battles |
Saturday September 9
| VENUE | TIME / DOOR PRICE | EVENT / LINE-UP |
|---|---|---|
| 18th Ward Brewing | 1pm, FREE | Power Pose + Starcleaner Reunion + Dream Prescription + Creatures + Yoshe Li |
| *Rockefeller Center | 1pm - 10pm, FREE | INDIEPLAZA 2023 feat. Nation of Language + Narrow Head + Video Age + Death Valley Girls + Crime in Stereo + Debby Friday + Miss Grit + Sinkane + Purr + Che |
| *Baby's All Right | 8pm, SOLD OUT | Palm (final tour) + Sediment Club |
| Knitting Factory at Baker Falls | 8pm, $35 | Modern English + Russian Baths + Andi |
| The Brooklyn Monarch | 6pm, $35 | Gorilla Biscuits + Cold World + Fucked Up + Bib + Restraining Order + Combust |
| Elsewhere - Zone One | 8pm, $25 | Chris Farren + Diners |
| **Forest Hills Stadium | 7pm, SOLD OUT | Arctic Monkeys + Fontaines D.C. |
| **Madison Square Garden | 8pm, $65 | Beck + Phoenix + Weyes Blood |
| Mercury Lounge | 9pm, $16 | Film School + Laveda |
| Public Records | 7pm, $25 | Sinkane Residency |
| UBS Arena | 7pm, SOLD OUT | AerosmithPEACE OUT: The Farewell Tour + The Black Crowes |
| Union Pool | 8pm, SOLD OUT | Protex + Dirty Fences + Mala Vista |
| Warsaw | 6pm, $30 | Wicca Phase Springs Eternal + Coucou Chloe + Death Bells + White Ring + Debby Friday + Mirsy |
Sunday September 10
| VENUE | TIME / DOOR PRICE | EVENT / LINE-UP |
|---|---|---|
| Arlene's Grocery | 7pm, $15 | Skorts + Car Becomes Airplane + Demonstrator + partygirl |
| Baby's All Right | 8pm, SOLD OUT | Palm (final tour) + Nina Ryser |
| Bowery Ballroom | 8pm, $25 | Ted Leo & the Pharmacists + Tami Hart |
| Irving Plaza | 6:30pm, $35 | Bowling For Soup + MEST + Authority Zero |
| Madison Square Garden | 8pm, SOLD OUT | Billy Joel |
| The Rooftop at Pier 17 | 7pm, SOLD OUT | Tove Lo + UPSAHL |
| Terminal 5 | 7pm, $35 | The Wonder Years + Anxious + Sweet Pill + Action/Adventure |
Monday September 11
| VENUE | TIME / DOOR PRICE | EVENT / LINE-UP |
|---|---|---|
| *Brooklyn Steel | 8pm, SOLD OUT | Pavement + Kiwi Jr. |
| *Sundown | 8pm, $15 | Spirits of Leo + Minaxi + Joyce |
Tuesday September 12
| VENUE | TIME / DOOR PRICE | EVENT / LINE-UP |
|---|---|---|
| Bowery Ballroom | 8pm, $25 | Claud + Boyish + Hank |
| *Brooklyn Bowl | 8pm, $35 | Warpaint + Radiate |
| *Brooklyn Steel | 8pm, $80 | Pavement + Momma |
| Elsewhere - Hall | 8pm, $25 | Downtown Boys + Babas |
| (le) poisson rouge | 8pm, $25 | City of the Sun residency - final night |
| Baby's All Right | 10pm, $15 | Being Dead + This Is Lorelei |
Wednesday September 13
| VENUE | TIME / DOOR PRICE | EVENT / LINE-UP |
|---|---|---|
| *Baby's All Right | 7pm, $15 | McKinley Dixon + TBA |
| Bowery Ballroim | 8pm, $40 | Fred Armisen + Annie Hart |
| *Brooklyn Steel | 8pm, $80 | Pavement + Garcia Peoples |
| Public Records | 7pm, $25 | Sinkane Residency |
Thursday September 14
| VENUE | TIME / DOOR PRICE | EVENT / LINE-UP |
|---|---|---|
| ALPHAVILLE | 9pm, $12 | Mary Vision single release show + secret guest + Rothko Rodeo |
| *****Knitting Factory at Baker Falls | 8:30pm, $15 | The New Colossus Festival and Super Bock Present Punchlove + Diary + Two-Man Giant Squid + Web Hex + Pons |
| *Brooklyn Steel | 8pm, SOLD OUT | Pavement + prison |
| Gold Sounds | 8pm, $15 | Skeeter de Milo + Wallet + Andrew Pichardo + Boy George Michael |
| Knockdown Center | 8pm, $40 | UNKLE Rōnin Live + billy woods + kenny segal |
| *Lincoln Center - David Rubenstein Atrium | 7:30pm, FREE | Trace Mountains |
| Saint Vitus | 8pm, SOLD OUT | Desert Fest pre-party feat. Colour Haze + Lo-Pan + Duel + Sonic Taboo |
| *Town Hall | 8pm, $35 | Love In Exile (Arooj Aftab + Vijay Iyer + Shahzad Ismaily) |
| *Baby's All Right | 10pm, SOLD OUT | Surf Curse + Dark Tea |
Friday September 15
| VENUE | TIME / DOOR PRICE | EVENT / LINE-UP |
|---|---|---|
| *Knockdown Center | 4:30pm, $60 ($120 for 2-day pass) | Desert Fest - Night 1/2 feat. Monster Magnet + R.I.P. + Colour Haze + Windhand + Heavy Temple + Castle Rat + Grave Bathers + 1000Mods + Valley of The Sun + Spellbook |
| *Bar Freda | 8pm, $15 | The Planes record release show + Kissed By an Animal + Endearments + Gorgeous |
| *Brooklyn Made | 8pm, $18 | Dream Wife + Tula Vera + Queer Vinyl Collective |
| *Forest Hills Stadium | 7:30pm, $80+ | Cigarettes After Sex |
| Hammerstein Ballroom at Manhattan Center | 7pm, SOLD OUT | BABYMETAL + Dethklok |
| *(le) poisson rouge | 7:30pm, $25 | Bush Tetras record release show + Weeping Icon |
| **Madison Square Garden | 8pm, $110+ | Hot 97 & WBLS Present Hip Hop Forever feat. Wu Tang + Mary J Blige + special guests Mariah Carey, Sean Paul & more |
| Main Drag Music | 8pm, $15 | Dead Leaf Echo + The Veldt + The City Gates + Glimmer |
| The Rooftop at Pier 17 | 6:30pm, $45 | Bishop Briggs + MisterWives + Raffaella |
| *Public Records | 7:30pm, $25 | Daedelus + High Pulp + Ghost Funk Orchestra |
| *Rough Trade | 6pm, SOLD OUT | Baroness acoustic performance & signing |
| Skyport Marina - The Liberty Belle | Boat leaves at 7pm, $30 | Rocks Off Cruises presents Four Year Strong + Koyo + Can't Swim |
| The Footlight at The Windjammer | 9pm, $15 | Plight + Bloody Your Hands + Vibrant Colors |
| Baby's All Right | 11pm, $25 | THE SPIRIT OF THE BEEHIVE + Mary Jane Dunphe |
Saturday September 16
| VENUE | TIME / DOOR PRICE | EVENT / LINE-UP |
|---|---|---|
| 18th Ward Brewing | 1pm, FREE | Two-Man Giant Squid + Sally Hatchet + Gum + Screenage + Couvo |
| *Knockdown Center | 2:30pm, $65 ($120 for 2-day pass) | Desert Fest - Night 2/2 feat. Melvins + Boris + Ecstatic Vision + Brant Bjork + Djunah + Godflesh + Dorthia Cottrell + Mondo Generator + Conan + Upper Wilds + White Hills + Mantar + Mick's Jaguar + Clouds Taste Satanic |
| *ALPHAVILLE | 8:30pm, $15 | Francie Moon/Crusasis Split Release Show + Shred Flinstone + Skorts |
| Brooklyn Made | 8pm, $20 | L.O.T.I.O.N. Multinational Corporation + Tozcos + Genocide Pact |
| Brooklyn Steel | 8pm, SOLD OUT | Nothing But Thieves + Kid Kapichi |
| Our Wicked Lady | 8pm, $15 | Trash Casual presents Good Looking Friends record release show + Rest Ashore + Baby Fang |
| Public Records | 7:30pm, $20 | Eli Winter Trio + Eileen Myles/Ryan SawyeSteve Gunn Trio |
Sunday September 17
| VENUE | TIME / DOOR PRICE | EVENT / LINE-UP |
|---|---|---|
| Forest Hills Stadium | 4pm, $60+ | Outlaw Music Festival feat. Willie Nelson & Family + Bobby Weir & Wolf Bros + The String Cheese Incident + Los Lobos + Particle Kid |
| Arlene's Grocery | 7pm, $15 | Aux Blood + Kela + Jeerleader + Dog Park |
| Knitting Factory at Baker Falls | 8:30pm, $20 | Provoker |
| Gramercy Theatre | 7pm, $35 | L7 |
| *Kings Theatre | 8pm, $70+ | Tash Sultana + Go-Jo |
| Our Wicked Lady | 8pm, $15 | Couvo short film release show + Rosso Rosso + Le Boss |
| *Racket | 8pm, $40 | The Lemonheads Come On Feel The Lemonheads 30th anniversary tour + Willy Mason |
Monday September 18
| VENUE | TIME / DOOR PRICE | EVENT / LINE-UP |
|---|---|---|
| *Elsewhere - The Hall | 8pm, $30 | of Montreal + Locate S,1 + Night Palace |
| Gramercy Theatre | 6pm, $40 | Everclear + The Ataris + The Pink Spiders |
| Hammerstein Ballroom at Manhattan Center | 7pm, $40+ | The Band Camino + Bad Suns + Charlotte Sands |
| Madison Square Garden | 8pm, $85+ | Peter Gabriel |
| Saint Vitus | 7pm, $15 | Effee Hawk + Adult Human Females + Tits Dick Ass + Crush Fund |
Tuesday September 19
| VENUE | TIME / DOOR PRICE | EVENT / LINE-UP |
|---|---|---|
| *ALPHAVILLE | 8:30pm, $15 | Tea EateWaltzer split release tour + Heavy Halo + Tetchy |
| *Madison Square Garden | 8pm, $50+ | The Postal Service Give Up 20th anniversary tour + Death Cab for Cutie Transatlanticism 20th anniversary tour |
Wednesday September 20
| VENUE | TIME / DOOR PRICE | EVENT / LINE-UP |
|---|---|---|
| *Brooklyn Steel | 8pm, $30 | Brian Jonestown Massacre |
| Hart Bar | 8pm, $10 | Tine Hill + Sweetbreads + Whaat + Rest Ashore |
| (le) poisson rouge | 8pm, SOLD OUT | Chat Pile + Nerver + Empire State Bastard |
| *Madison Square Garden | 8pm, $50+ | The Postal Service Give Up 20th anniversary tour + Death Cab for Cutie Transatlanticism 20th anniversary tour |
| *Music Hall of Williamsburg | 8pm, SOLD OUT | Youth Lagoon + urika's bedroom |
| *Our Wicked Lady | 8pm, $15 | Onesie + Dinowalrus + Glimmer + Catty |
| UBS Arena | 7:30pm, $200+ | Eagles The Long Goodbye tour + Steely Dan |
Thursday September 21
| VENUE | TIME / DOOR PRICE | EVENT / LINE-UP |
|---|---|---|
| ALPHAVILLE | 8:30pm, $15 | The Unders + Ouster Nash + Shybaby + Egg Cream |
| **Brooklyn Made | 8pm, $25 | Teenage Wrist + Spiritual Cramp + Trauma Ray |
| *Brooklyn Steel | 8pm, SOLD OUT | Death Grips |
| Gramercy Theatre | 6pm, $22+ | Further Seems Forever How To Start A Fire 20th anniversary tour |
| *Knockdown Center | 8pm, SOLD OUT | Black Country, New Road + Daneshevskaya |
| Our Wicked Lady | 8pm, $15 | Steele FC + Marjorine + Duel Ferns |
| Rubulad | 8pm, $15 | Pons + Abbatia + Purple Hurt + Samara Slaughter |
Friday September 22
| VENUE | TIME / DOOR PRICE | EVENT / LINE-UP |
|---|---|---|
| *Brooklyn Steel | 8pm, SOLD OUT | Death Grips |
| Forest Hills Stadium | 6pm, $75+ | Duran Duran w/ Nile Rodgers & CHIC + Bastille |
| Heaven Can Wait | 8pm, $12 | Big Bliss + Hit |
| Irving Plaza | 7pm, $70 | A benefit for Artists in Action feat. Bush |
| *Kings Theatre | 8pm, $50+ | BrooklynVegan presents The Mars Volta + Teri Gender Bender |
| Main Drag Music | 9pm, $20 | LOTION + Nite Music |
| *Mercury Lounge | 9:30pm, $15 | Komodos + Shred Flintstone + Deep Sea Peach Tree |
| *Purgatory | 8pm, $15 | "PUBIS" aka Dead Tooth + Punt EP release show + Pons single release show + Jelly Kelly |
| *Rubulad | 8pm, $15 | The Last Gaze of Summer feat. Mx Lonely + Ringing + Nara's Room + Joyer + Public Circuit + Wiring + Nyxy Nyx + Aux Blood + Crate |
| TV EYE | 8pm, $20 | Tyvek + Foyer Red |
| *Warsaw | 8pm, $25 | Osees + Population II |
Saturday September 23
| VENUE | TIME / DOOR PRICE | EVENT / LINE-UP |
|---|---|---|
| 18th Ward Brewing | 1pm, FREE | Aaron Pfenning + Phantom Signals + Holiem + Castle Black + Reclining Nude |
| *Trans-Pecos | 2:30, $20 | QPR presents The Pale Hound + Big Girl + Jade Tourniquete + Themme + Eevie Echoes + QIRL + Gal Fieri + Femcel + Plastic Baby Genius |
| *Bowery Ballroom | 9pm, $25 | Islands |
| The Broadway | 8pm, $15 | Laurel Canyon + S.C.A.B. + Trinket + Sleepy Jeanne |
| *Kings Theatre | 8pm, $45+ | WFUV presents The Breeders + Screaming Females |
| *The Rooftop at Pier 17 | 7pm, $40 | Grace Potter + Ghost Funk Orchestra |
| Rockaway Bazaar at Beach 97 St | 6pm, $5 | Max Power presents The Last Day of Summer feat. Nihiloceros + Onesie + Le Big Zero + Sorry Darling |
| Warsaw | 8pm, SOLD OUT | Osees + Nolan Potter's Nightmare Band |
| *Webster Hall | 7pm, $25 | Fiddlehead + Never Ending Game + Praise + Mary Jane Dunphe |
| The Footlight at The Windjammer | 9pm, $15 | Drummers Can Achieve + InCircles + Allapartus + What Strange Beast |
Sunday September 24
| VENUE | TIME / DOOR PRICE | EVENT / LINE-UP |
|---|---|---|
| Arlene's Grocery | 7pm, $15 | Almost Sex + MIIRORS + Color Tongue + Rosso Rosso |
Monday September 25
| VENUE | TIME / DOOR PRICE | EVENT / LINE-UP |
|---|---|---|
| Irving Plaza | 7pm, $30 | Neon Trees + Laundry Day + Silent Rival |
| TV EYE | 8pm, $12 | The Invisible College + Echo Moth + Minaxi |
Tuesday September 26
| VENUE | TIME / DOOR PRICE | EVENT / LINE-UP |
|---|---|---|
| City Winery | 8pm, SOLD OUT | Toad the Wet Sprocket |
| Radio City Music Hall | 8pm, $100+ | Janelle Monáe |
| Sundown | 8pm, $15 | Two-Man Giant Squid + O. Wake + Whenwolves |
| Town Hall | 8pm, $66+ (by request only) | Mitski acoustic preview of upcoming record The Land is Inhospitable and So Are We + Mary Lattimore |
Wednesday September 27
| VENUE | TIME / DOOR PRICE | EVENT / LINE-UP |
|---|---|---|
| Arlene's Grocery | 7pm, $15 | Tula Vera + Senior Living + Pencildive + April Gloom |
| Baby's All Right | 10pm, $18 | Wine Lips + Zip Tie Handcuffs |
| Barclay's Center | 8pm, 80+ | NY State of Mind Tour feat. Wu-Tang Clan + Nas + De La Soul |
| **Bowery Ballroom | 8pm, $20 | Ratboys + Free Range |
| *Brooklyn Made | 8pm, $17 | Deeper + Godcaster |
| *Brooklyn Steel | 8pm, $30 | Movements + Mannequin Pussy + Softcult + Heart to Gold |
| Hart Bar | 8pm, $15 | Pop Music Fever Dream + Two-Man Giant Quid + Uncle Skunk + QIRL |
| Heaven Can Wait | 8pm, $15 | Glom + Morning Silk + Barefoot Young |
| Mama Tried | 8pm, FREE | Creek & Kills + The Beat Awfuls + Desert Sharks |
| The Sultan Room | 8pm, $20 | Stolen Jarsrecord release show + Telecomsrecord release show + Junebug |
| *Webster Hall | 8pm, SOLD OUT | Slowdive |
Thursday September 28
| VENUE | TIME / DOOR PRICE | EVENT / LINE-UP |
|---|---|---|
| Brooklyn Steel | 8pm, $40 | Matt & Kim + babybaby_explores |
| Gramercy Theatre | 7pm, $35 (BoGo via Ticketmaster but pay fees) | Code Orange The Above NYC record release show + vein.FM |
| (le) poisson rouge | 8pm, $20 | W.H. Lung + Activity |
| The Rooftop at Pier 17 | 6pm, $40 | Old 97's 30th anniversary tour + Drive-By Truckers |
| Purgatory | 9pm, $15 | Pastel Hell + Cardillo + Debbie Dopamine |
| *Webster Hall | 8pm, SOLD OUT | Slowdive |
Friday September 29
| VENUE | TIME / DOOR PRICE | EVENT / LINE-UP |
|---|---|---|
| Brooklyn Steel | 8pm, $40 | Broken Social Scene + Hannah Georgas |
| *The Gutter | 8pm, $15 | Wetsuit + Lily Mao & the Resonaters + War Honey + BenBen single release show |
| *The Meadows | 6:30pm, SOLD OUT | Scowl + Militarie Gun + MSPAINT + Somerset Thrower |
| Music Hall of Williamsburg | 9pm, SOLD OUT | Swans + Norman Westberg |
| Our Wicked Lady | 8pm, $20 | 13th Law Crisis Core EP release show + Tetchy single release show + Blue Mena + Sira |
| *Trans-Pecos | 8pm, $12 | To The Wedding + Plastic + Rat Palace |
Saturday September 30
| VENUE | TIME / DOOR PRICE | EVENT / LINE-UP |
|---|---|---|
| *18th Ward Brewing | 1pm, FREE | Nite Music + Shilpa Ray + Pons + Ranch Ranch |
| Bowery Ballroom | 9pm, $25 | Velocity Girl + Elk City + Jeanines |
| *Gottscheer Hall | 8pm, $15 | Patio Reunion + Collection Record Release Show + Customer |
| *Main Drag Music | 7pm, $15 | Nihiloceros Re-Destroyed release party + Desert Sharks + A Very Special Episode + Frida Kill + Nevva + Ilithios |
| Music Hall of Williamsburg | 9pm, SOLD OUT | Swans + Norman Westberg |
| *Rubulad | 8pm, $15 | Rubulad presents Living Dolls feat. Skorts + Chico Raro + Fly Ashtray + Leila Adu + The Dirt Whisperers |
| *Saint Vitus | 7pm, SOLD OUT | Scowl + Militarie Gun + MSPAINT + Somerset Thrower |
last updated 9/18 11:20
2023.08.09 18:29 Saylor_Man Radio Free Orion - Chapter 5 [A Nature of Predators Fanfic]
Credit to u/SpacePaladin15 for this universe, and sparking the creative impulse I hadn't felt in a while.
Thanks to u/RegulusPratus for the name of the fic.
Presenting Part 1 of Orion’s crossover with u/oobanooba-
[First] [Previous] [Next]
Memory Transcription Subject: “Orion”, Human, Pirate Radio Host
Date: [Standardized Human Time] 18th November 2136
While I had heard a lot about humanity settling on Venlil Prime as part of the refugee efforts, I had never visited the place before and didn't know much about it. After looking it up in Soma's database, I discovered that it was "tidally locked," meaning one side of the planet constantly faced its sun while the other side remained in perpetual darkness. However, there was a narrow strip between these two sides that boasted the right conditions for habitation.
Now, it would be ideal to land in that beautiful green band, but the problem was that I was completely broke, uninsured, and unlicensed. "Soma, what's the fine for landing on a dock without a license?"
"On Venlil Prime, the fine for flying unlicensed and uninsured is 5000 credits, and they'll impound the vehicle," Soma replied matter-of-factly. That was not good news, not at all. My only source of income came from donations from my listeners, so it would be quite a while before I could amass that many credits in my account. If I weren't wearing my helmet, I'd be biting my nails right now. We needed to find a place where we could touch down inconspicuously and survive the extreme weather conditions without freezing or frying to death.
After scanning through the maps Soma had pulled up for me, I stumbled upon a potential solution. "Soma, what do you have on the town named Deeplake?"
"Deeplake is a moderately sized agricultural center with a small but densely packed city located around a large lake," Soma informed me.
"Anywhere good to touch down outside of town?" I inquired further. Soma took a moment to think, and her fans started to buzz audibly as she processed the information.
"Between Deeplake and Greenmeadow, there's a reasonably sized clearing not too far from a main road that leads into Deeplake," Soma finally responded. It sounded like a viable option, hopefully it would provide enough cover and potential for an intriguing story.
With Soma's guidance, I steered the spacecraft towards the designated clearing. As we approached the surface, I could feel my heart pounding with a mix of excitement and anxiety. Landing on a planet without proper authorization was absolutely nerve-wracking and totally risky .But, the thought of a good story and maybe someone down there being a listener outweighed my fears.
Our ship gently touched down on the soft ground, and I let out a sigh of relief. We had made it safely to our landing spot, and I couldn't wait to explore. I powered down the ship's engines and began the necessary checks before disembarking. My mind was already racing with ideas for captivating content, maybe I could find a farmer and do a special on vegetables and fruit.
Once everything was in order I attached a strap to soma and slung her over my arm then stepped out of the shuttle. The air was crisp and carried a faint scent of vegetation from the surrounding farmland. The green band stretched before me, contrasting beautifully with the darkened horizon behind. It was a surreal sight, and I couldn't help but feel a sense of awe.
Before stepping around the ship I took the doormat off of the airlock and set it in front of the door. Not a speck of dirt would get inside if I could help it.
Underneath the shuttle was a storage area for anything that could be exposed to vacuum without any issues. Popping the hatch open, I pulled my old bike out. Thankfully, it was light enough that even with the higher gravity of Venlil Prime, I would be able to lug it out to the main road. I started to make my way between the trees before tapping a camera that I’d attached to my helmet. “Soma, can you see everything?” I could hear that same whirring at my side again.
“Orion, it appears you’ve picked up some stragglers.” Looking around wildly, I whipped around, and behind me, I saw a small group of birds following me. “Flower-birds, native to Venlil Prime, herbivorous and incredibly docile because of a lack of natural predators.” After a moment, one of the small pastel birds spread its wings wide and started rapidly stepping side to side.
“Soma, is the bird trying to intimidate me?”
“Negative, it appears to be making a display. I think it believes you to be the biggest and prettiest bird around because of your bright coloration.” Soma stated quite matter-of-factly.
Great, I’m getting hit on by the locals.
Turning back around, I tried to ignore the growing congregation of birds behind me and continued to the main road.
After a few minutes passed, I reached the road and set my bike down. The birds seemed apprehensive about stepping onto the pavement, so I bid them farewell before mounting my bike and beginning my excursion in earnest.
As I pedaled along the road a familiar sense began to well up. The landscapes were beautiful, but held a hint of nostalgia. Slowly I felt myself transported into a familiar scene, riding my bike down the main road through town, the roundabout circling the clock tower. It had stopped working decades before I lived there. Right across from it was that cute little diner, though in all my years I’d never stepped inside. Cresting up over the hill that lead into the rest of town I could see it all. “Orion, are you okay?” Soma’s voice brought me back to reality before I almost ran off the road.
“Y-yeah, I’m fine. Just got lost in the moment” I slowly coasted down the hill and into the town. Soma had described it as small but that must be on a more galactic scale because it was bigger than my hometown. I must've gotten here at a good time as it seemed that everyone was out and about. Groups of venlil made their way around the town. Some clearly gave me a wide berth but I paid them no mind. “Some skittish sheep shant make me shun this scintillating scene!” I heard a buzz come from Soma
“Orion, maybe hold back on the alliteration, I doubt it makes sense cross-linguistically.” She was right, but it wasn’t meant for them anyways. I rode down the main street before coming up to a beautiful park that sat right next to the lake. I could see a ferry going across it and multiple stalls selling treats along the paths. Dismounting my bike I found a suitable post, seeing as there’s no bike racks around here, and locked the bike to it.
I don't know what I expected coming to an ‘alien’ park; everything seemed so normal. Small Venlil children ran around playing games. People reclined on benches and engaged in those short conversations where you say nothing in particular. Groups of Venlil were having picnics on the grass, watching the ferry cross the lake in the opposite direction. After a month of running around not knowing what I was doing, the scene before me felt so calm. Looking out next to the water, I noticed another familiar sight.
"Soma, look!" Her camera turned. "They even have a splash pad for the kids!"
Venlil children jumped up and down, swatting their paws at small geysers of water. It was beautiful. Without realizing it, I had started to walk down the path toward the water. The entire scene reminded me of home once again.
Now standing at the edge of the emerald water, I squatted down and sat on the bank, reaching a gloved hand into the water. It was cold, that refreshing kind of cold that comes from a beautiful summer's day. I could hear the faint buzz from Soma's camera as she looked around.
"Orion, incoming, left."
Looking over, I could see a small cream-colored Venlil child running toward me, holding something in his paws. Even though I was sitting down, I was about face level with the child as he approached. Without a moment's notice, a small creature was shoved into my face.
"Hey Human! Have you seen one of these before?" He spoke, holding what looked like a squirming amphibian way too close to me. "Take it!" The young boy pressed the poor thing right up against my helmet, smearing strange gunk across it. Reaching up, I took the creature between my gloved hands.
"Soma, please tell me what this alien frog is." I whispered.
"Tumbrim: amphibian native to Venlil Prime, secretes a thick mucus when threatened. Common in the warmer regions. Named after the sound they make." Hearing this, the kid clapped his paws together excitedly.
"Tumbrim, tumbrim!" The kid ran off, shouting, "Mom! The Human over there knows what a tumbrim is!" Leaving me with a rather anxious tumbrim in my hands, I inspected it closely. Dark green bumpy skin akin to a toad, but its pupils were almost star-shaped. Turning the creature over in my hand, I poked its soft belly; it took in a strange rattling breath then pushed out a shrill ‘Breeeeeem’ before flipping itself around and hopping straight into the lake. Leaning back over the water, I put my hands in the water and worked the mucus off my gloves before removing them and using a handkerchief to clean my helmet.
Putting my gloves back on and attempting to dry them off on my jumpsuit, I stood back up and started my way up the bank. Just ahead of me, a dock jutted out onto the lake with what looked like an office to buy tickets for the ferry and a bright purple bottle-shaped stand with a stem coming out of the top. "Soma, what does that sign say?" I asked, pointing at the sign on the stand.
"Frozen Juice-Fruit Juice."
"And what's a juice-fruit?"
"Juice-fruit: a purple fruit with a wet slush-like flesh, said to taste like mint and bananas."
Wait, that meant…
"Frozen banana stand." I whispered. "Frozen Banana Stand!" Now a shout. I started dashing down the bank toward the dock, laughing maniacally the entire way. Multiple Venlil jumped out of the path, surprised bleats escaping them as I ran toward the stand. Quickly turning onto the dock, I continued down before skidding to a halt right in front of the stand. "Banana-man, one of your finest, please!" A stunned Venlil stood behind the register.
"W-what?" he stammered.
"Fruit-juicer, juice me one of your juiciest juice-fruits for a fruity frozen juice-fruit treat."
"What?" The Venlil stepped back in the stand; there wasn't much room, so they couldn't get that far away.
"Orion, you're scaring them." Soma chimed in.
Right, they're afraid of you.
"Sorry about that." I made myself small. "Could I order a frozen juice-fruit?" The cowering Venlil tried desperately to pull themselves together. They straightened themselves up to the best of their ability before stepping up to the register.
"O-one human-sized frozen juice-fruit juice." They rang it up, and the price appeared on the screen. Gingerly, I tapped my pad to the scanner and heard it ping before they turned back around and got to work. They pulled out two of what I assumed to be the juice-fruit from a fridge, rolled them back and forth on a cutting board before chopping the tops off and squeezing the slushy juice into a paper cup. "E-enjoy." The Venlil did what looked like an approximation of a smile.
I guess they get human customers often enough for it to rub off on them.
Grabbing the drink and stepping back onto the bank, I turned and looked across the water. It was getting darker as the sun started to set... The sun started to set?
"Soma, didn't you say Venlil Prime was 'Tidally Locked'? I thought that meant there weren't any days or nights." Soma's fans kicked in yet again.
"Correction: Venlil Prime, while tidally locked, experiences some axial tilt. Meaning that certain areas around the habitable zone experience a 'night' every 25 of their 'paws,' a paw being equivalent to 20 human hours." Listening to Soma explain it to me, I pulled my helmet slightly up and took a sip of the Juice-Fruit slushie. Incredibly minty and definitely tastes like banana, though the texture is a little strange. Enjoying the cold beverage, I watched the sun dip further down.
Finishing the drink, I lowered my helmet back down, sealing it back in place and began to look for a trash can to dispose of the cup into. There was one right at the pier, so I walked back to it. Looking out at the lake, the twilight made it look even more beautiful. For a moment, I got lost looking at it, before noticing something odd in the reflection of the water. Red flashing lights on top of a vehicle. Huh, guess even alien planets have emergency services. Good to know. Watching the vehicles come in and out of visibility behind the buildings around the lake, I began to wonder what could've happened for there to be such a response. As the flashing lights began to get closer, a thought occurred. "Oh... They're here because of me."
Quickly the vans drove across the grass and up to the pier where I stood. Screeching to a halt in front of me. Six Venlil in reflective silver suits holding what appeared to be flamethrowers burst out and began to encircle me. "Soma, any idea what's going on?" I started to ask before one of the silver-clad Venlil interjected.
"We're the Exterminators, Predator!" He spat that word out with the clear indication of an insult. "Get down and submit or be turned to ash." He pulled the trigger on his flamethrower, sending a gout of flame rushing up into the air.
"Friends, Venlil, lend me your ears."
No, please, not now.
"For I am but a humble bard, a wanderer of worlds, and a speaker of truths." Two of the exterminators shifted uncomfortably, another pushed forward. I raised a hand out to the closest one. "Is it a threat I see before me, or merely a misunderstanding that clouds the air?" Another column of fire burst forth into the coming night. "O' Noble Venlil, let not the flames of anger consume our better judgments." I paused for a moment, allowing the sun to sink further below the horizon. "But let the balm of reason soothe these troubled waters."
Two more of them exchanged tail flicks; they were getting anxious. "To burn or not to burn, that is the question," I brought my arms close to my chest. "Whether 'tis nobler in the minds of Venlil to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous assumptions, or to take arms against a sea of doubts—" I thrust my arms outward "and by opposing, end them?" At that moment, the sun fully dipped below the horizon, and in the second of darkness before the streetlamps came on. I quickly turned and bolted into the darkness.
submitted by Saylor_Man to HFY [link] [comments]
Thanks to u/RegulusPratus for the name of the fic.
Presenting Part 1 of Orion’s crossover with u/oobanooba-
[First] [Previous] [Next]
Memory Transcription Subject: “Orion”, Human, Pirate Radio Host
Date: [Standardized Human Time] 18th November 2136
While I had heard a lot about humanity settling on Venlil Prime as part of the refugee efforts, I had never visited the place before and didn't know much about it. After looking it up in Soma's database, I discovered that it was "tidally locked," meaning one side of the planet constantly faced its sun while the other side remained in perpetual darkness. However, there was a narrow strip between these two sides that boasted the right conditions for habitation.
Now, it would be ideal to land in that beautiful green band, but the problem was that I was completely broke, uninsured, and unlicensed. "Soma, what's the fine for landing on a dock without a license?"
"On Venlil Prime, the fine for flying unlicensed and uninsured is 5000 credits, and they'll impound the vehicle," Soma replied matter-of-factly. That was not good news, not at all. My only source of income came from donations from my listeners, so it would be quite a while before I could amass that many credits in my account. If I weren't wearing my helmet, I'd be biting my nails right now. We needed to find a place where we could touch down inconspicuously and survive the extreme weather conditions without freezing or frying to death.
After scanning through the maps Soma had pulled up for me, I stumbled upon a potential solution. "Soma, what do you have on the town named Deeplake?"
"Deeplake is a moderately sized agricultural center with a small but densely packed city located around a large lake," Soma informed me.
"Anywhere good to touch down outside of town?" I inquired further. Soma took a moment to think, and her fans started to buzz audibly as she processed the information.
"Between Deeplake and Greenmeadow, there's a reasonably sized clearing not too far from a main road that leads into Deeplake," Soma finally responded. It sounded like a viable option, hopefully it would provide enough cover and potential for an intriguing story.
With Soma's guidance, I steered the spacecraft towards the designated clearing. As we approached the surface, I could feel my heart pounding with a mix of excitement and anxiety. Landing on a planet without proper authorization was absolutely nerve-wracking and totally risky .But, the thought of a good story and maybe someone down there being a listener outweighed my fears.
Our ship gently touched down on the soft ground, and I let out a sigh of relief. We had made it safely to our landing spot, and I couldn't wait to explore. I powered down the ship's engines and began the necessary checks before disembarking. My mind was already racing with ideas for captivating content, maybe I could find a farmer and do a special on vegetables and fruit.
Once everything was in order I attached a strap to soma and slung her over my arm then stepped out of the shuttle. The air was crisp and carried a faint scent of vegetation from the surrounding farmland. The green band stretched before me, contrasting beautifully with the darkened horizon behind. It was a surreal sight, and I couldn't help but feel a sense of awe.
Before stepping around the ship I took the doormat off of the airlock and set it in front of the door. Not a speck of dirt would get inside if I could help it.
Underneath the shuttle was a storage area for anything that could be exposed to vacuum without any issues. Popping the hatch open, I pulled my old bike out. Thankfully, it was light enough that even with the higher gravity of Venlil Prime, I would be able to lug it out to the main road. I started to make my way between the trees before tapping a camera that I’d attached to my helmet. “Soma, can you see everything?” I could hear that same whirring at my side again.
“Orion, it appears you’ve picked up some stragglers.” Looking around wildly, I whipped around, and behind me, I saw a small group of birds following me. “Flower-birds, native to Venlil Prime, herbivorous and incredibly docile because of a lack of natural predators.” After a moment, one of the small pastel birds spread its wings wide and started rapidly stepping side to side.
“Soma, is the bird trying to intimidate me?”
“Negative, it appears to be making a display. I think it believes you to be the biggest and prettiest bird around because of your bright coloration.” Soma stated quite matter-of-factly.
Great, I’m getting hit on by the locals.
Turning back around, I tried to ignore the growing congregation of birds behind me and continued to the main road.
After a few minutes passed, I reached the road and set my bike down. The birds seemed apprehensive about stepping onto the pavement, so I bid them farewell before mounting my bike and beginning my excursion in earnest.
As I pedaled along the road a familiar sense began to well up. The landscapes were beautiful, but held a hint of nostalgia. Slowly I felt myself transported into a familiar scene, riding my bike down the main road through town, the roundabout circling the clock tower. It had stopped working decades before I lived there. Right across from it was that cute little diner, though in all my years I’d never stepped inside. Cresting up over the hill that lead into the rest of town I could see it all. “Orion, are you okay?” Soma’s voice brought me back to reality before I almost ran off the road.
“Y-yeah, I’m fine. Just got lost in the moment” I slowly coasted down the hill and into the town. Soma had described it as small but that must be on a more galactic scale because it was bigger than my hometown. I must've gotten here at a good time as it seemed that everyone was out and about. Groups of venlil made their way around the town. Some clearly gave me a wide berth but I paid them no mind. “Some skittish sheep shant make me shun this scintillating scene!” I heard a buzz come from Soma
“Orion, maybe hold back on the alliteration, I doubt it makes sense cross-linguistically.” She was right, but it wasn’t meant for them anyways. I rode down the main street before coming up to a beautiful park that sat right next to the lake. I could see a ferry going across it and multiple stalls selling treats along the paths. Dismounting my bike I found a suitable post, seeing as there’s no bike racks around here, and locked the bike to it.
I don't know what I expected coming to an ‘alien’ park; everything seemed so normal. Small Venlil children ran around playing games. People reclined on benches and engaged in those short conversations where you say nothing in particular. Groups of Venlil were having picnics on the grass, watching the ferry cross the lake in the opposite direction. After a month of running around not knowing what I was doing, the scene before me felt so calm. Looking out next to the water, I noticed another familiar sight.
"Soma, look!" Her camera turned. "They even have a splash pad for the kids!"
Venlil children jumped up and down, swatting their paws at small geysers of water. It was beautiful. Without realizing it, I had started to walk down the path toward the water. The entire scene reminded me of home once again.
Now standing at the edge of the emerald water, I squatted down and sat on the bank, reaching a gloved hand into the water. It was cold, that refreshing kind of cold that comes from a beautiful summer's day. I could hear the faint buzz from Soma's camera as she looked around.
"Orion, incoming, left."
Looking over, I could see a small cream-colored Venlil child running toward me, holding something in his paws. Even though I was sitting down, I was about face level with the child as he approached. Without a moment's notice, a small creature was shoved into my face.
"Hey Human! Have you seen one of these before?" He spoke, holding what looked like a squirming amphibian way too close to me. "Take it!" The young boy pressed the poor thing right up against my helmet, smearing strange gunk across it. Reaching up, I took the creature between my gloved hands.
"Soma, please tell me what this alien frog is." I whispered.
"Tumbrim: amphibian native to Venlil Prime, secretes a thick mucus when threatened. Common in the warmer regions. Named after the sound they make." Hearing this, the kid clapped his paws together excitedly.
"Tumbrim, tumbrim!" The kid ran off, shouting, "Mom! The Human over there knows what a tumbrim is!" Leaving me with a rather anxious tumbrim in my hands, I inspected it closely. Dark green bumpy skin akin to a toad, but its pupils were almost star-shaped. Turning the creature over in my hand, I poked its soft belly; it took in a strange rattling breath then pushed out a shrill ‘Breeeeeem’ before flipping itself around and hopping straight into the lake. Leaning back over the water, I put my hands in the water and worked the mucus off my gloves before removing them and using a handkerchief to clean my helmet.
Putting my gloves back on and attempting to dry them off on my jumpsuit, I stood back up and started my way up the bank. Just ahead of me, a dock jutted out onto the lake with what looked like an office to buy tickets for the ferry and a bright purple bottle-shaped stand with a stem coming out of the top. "Soma, what does that sign say?" I asked, pointing at the sign on the stand.
"Frozen Juice-Fruit Juice."
"And what's a juice-fruit?"
"Juice-fruit: a purple fruit with a wet slush-like flesh, said to taste like mint and bananas."
Wait, that meant…
"Frozen banana stand." I whispered. "Frozen Banana Stand!" Now a shout. I started dashing down the bank toward the dock, laughing maniacally the entire way. Multiple Venlil jumped out of the path, surprised bleats escaping them as I ran toward the stand. Quickly turning onto the dock, I continued down before skidding to a halt right in front of the stand. "Banana-man, one of your finest, please!" A stunned Venlil stood behind the register.
"W-what?" he stammered.
"Fruit-juicer, juice me one of your juiciest juice-fruits for a fruity frozen juice-fruit treat."
"What?" The Venlil stepped back in the stand; there wasn't much room, so they couldn't get that far away.
"Orion, you're scaring them." Soma chimed in.
Right, they're afraid of you.
"Sorry about that." I made myself small. "Could I order a frozen juice-fruit?" The cowering Venlil tried desperately to pull themselves together. They straightened themselves up to the best of their ability before stepping up to the register.
"O-one human-sized frozen juice-fruit juice." They rang it up, and the price appeared on the screen. Gingerly, I tapped my pad to the scanner and heard it ping before they turned back around and got to work. They pulled out two of what I assumed to be the juice-fruit from a fridge, rolled them back and forth on a cutting board before chopping the tops off and squeezing the slushy juice into a paper cup. "E-enjoy." The Venlil did what looked like an approximation of a smile.
I guess they get human customers often enough for it to rub off on them.
Grabbing the drink and stepping back onto the bank, I turned and looked across the water. It was getting darker as the sun started to set... The sun started to set?
"Soma, didn't you say Venlil Prime was 'Tidally Locked'? I thought that meant there weren't any days or nights." Soma's fans kicked in yet again.
"Correction: Venlil Prime, while tidally locked, experiences some axial tilt. Meaning that certain areas around the habitable zone experience a 'night' every 25 of their 'paws,' a paw being equivalent to 20 human hours." Listening to Soma explain it to me, I pulled my helmet slightly up and took a sip of the Juice-Fruit slushie. Incredibly minty and definitely tastes like banana, though the texture is a little strange. Enjoying the cold beverage, I watched the sun dip further down.
Finishing the drink, I lowered my helmet back down, sealing it back in place and began to look for a trash can to dispose of the cup into. There was one right at the pier, so I walked back to it. Looking out at the lake, the twilight made it look even more beautiful. For a moment, I got lost looking at it, before noticing something odd in the reflection of the water. Red flashing lights on top of a vehicle. Huh, guess even alien planets have emergency services. Good to know. Watching the vehicles come in and out of visibility behind the buildings around the lake, I began to wonder what could've happened for there to be such a response. As the flashing lights began to get closer, a thought occurred. "Oh... They're here because of me."
Quickly the vans drove across the grass and up to the pier where I stood. Screeching to a halt in front of me. Six Venlil in reflective silver suits holding what appeared to be flamethrowers burst out and began to encircle me. "Soma, any idea what's going on?" I started to ask before one of the silver-clad Venlil interjected.
"We're the Exterminators, Predator!" He spat that word out with the clear indication of an insult. "Get down and submit or be turned to ash." He pulled the trigger on his flamethrower, sending a gout of flame rushing up into the air.
"Friends, Venlil, lend me your ears."
No, please, not now.
"For I am but a humble bard, a wanderer of worlds, and a speaker of truths." Two of the exterminators shifted uncomfortably, another pushed forward. I raised a hand out to the closest one. "Is it a threat I see before me, or merely a misunderstanding that clouds the air?" Another column of fire burst forth into the coming night. "O' Noble Venlil, let not the flames of anger consume our better judgments." I paused for a moment, allowing the sun to sink further below the horizon. "But let the balm of reason soothe these troubled waters."
Two more of them exchanged tail flicks; they were getting anxious. "To burn or not to burn, that is the question," I brought my arms close to my chest. "Whether 'tis nobler in the minds of Venlil to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous assumptions, or to take arms against a sea of doubts—" I thrust my arms outward "and by opposing, end them?" At that moment, the sun fully dipped below the horizon, and in the second of darkness before the streetlamps came on. I quickly turned and bolted into the darkness.
2023.08.07 15:39 EPCOT_Is_My_Favorite New Playlists Released (Week of 8/7/2023)
 | submitted by EPCOT_Is_My_Favorite to SongPop2 [link] [comments] |
2023.07.14 18:52 eekbarbaderkle Best names of the 2023 MLB Draft
Before the unofficial second half of the MLB season kicks off this evening, I wanted to commemorate the recently-completed 2023 draft by highlighting some of the best name talent from this year's crop.
Every year, many great baseball names enter the minor league ranks via the draft. Some of these names receive much fanfare, while others slip by unnoticed. If the reader will permit me to noot my own horn a bit, I was among the first to identify Lars Nootbaar as an 80-grade name talent in my first version of this post back in 2018. What new sleeper names will emerge from this year's draft class? Only time will tell. But here are some of my personal top picks.
Rhett Lowder - Round 1, Pick 7 (CIN) - Kicking off the early-round festivities is a good, hearty baseball name. It will be very easy for scoreboard operators (hopefully in Cincinnati) to implore fans to “Gett Lowder” for years to come. “Rhett” is just a sturdy name that oozes strength and confidence to my eyes.
Noble Meyer - 1,10 (MIA) - If “Rhett Lowder” is a name that embodies rugged strength, Noble Meyer is a strong name on the other end of the spectrum. Noble derives his power from prestige, wealth, and an innate fear of what the Meyer lineage stands for. Will MLB hitters tackle the monarchy, or will the Meyer clan reign supreme?
Hurston Waldrep - 1,24 (ATL) - Late in the first round, and now we’re getting into the truly funky baseball names. For generations, many Great Baseball Names have been names that feel just a little bit clunky and made up. Neither “Hurston” nor “Waldrep” is an outrageously silly name. But neither is exactly conventional to the ear either. This is a name that was birthed to play baseball.
Kemp Alderman - 2,8 (MIA) - I like names that have a little bit of dissonance. “Alderman” is a name that suggests a bit of regality and prestige. Kemp, on the other hand, feels rough and rugged. It would be like if somebody named their child Noble Rhett.
Nazzan Zanetello - 2,11 (BOS) - My beloved Red Sox snagged some solid name talent with their 2nd round pick. Credit to u/Stock412 for observing that Nazzan’s first name is a palindrome. Also, I just like any name with an abundance of Z’s.
Jackson Baumeister - CB-B,2 (BAL) - Here we have our first entry of the 2023 draft into another class of baseball names. This is the class that sounds like it should either belong to a baseball player or a wealthy aristocrat, and nothing in between. If Jackson Baumeister was not playing baseball, he would be running amok at the local yacht club and letting everybody know that his father is an attorney.
Kiefer Lord - 3,16 (BAL) - Lord Kief comes to Baltimore in the summer of 2026.
Maui Ahuna - 4,16 (SF) - It’s not often that a person’s name tells you exactly what state they are from. Yet, I would be delighted by this name even more if it turned out he was born and raised in Montana.
Izack Tiger - 7,7 (TEX) - This one speaks for itself. Just a badass name, plain and simple. Bonus points to Mr. and Mrs. Tiger for foregoing the conventional spelling of “Isaac”. Now it’s their son’s turn to earn his stripes as a professional.
Owen Wild - 7,19 (TB) - The name itself is not too special. But a pitcher named “Wild” is always worth noting.
Jatnk Diaz - 8,6 (DET) - Jatnk Diaz makes the list because I have never seen the letters “tnk” combined together in that exact sequence. Except on occasions when I smash my hands randomly over the keyboard, perhaps. I can say with complete honesty that I am not sure how to pronounce this name.
Trennor O’Donnell - 8,14 (BOS) - See entry for “Jackson Baumeister” (above).
Craig Yoho - 8,18 (MIL) - That last name simply elicits joy. It’s fun to say. It’s fun to look at. It simultaneously makes me think of yogurt and a yo-yo.
Ixan Henderson - 8,20 (STL) - I had never come across the name “Ixan” before in all my years. But it apparently is a thing. Ixan is apparently the master of his own destiny, so it’s up to him to crack the big league roster, I guess.
Kannon Kemp - 8,27 (SD) - “Kannon” is just a fantastic baseball/children’s cartoon superhero name. Bonus points for alliteration and a nice sonic cadence as well.
RJ Schreck - 9,23 (SEA) - Like Shrek. The ogre. Get it? RJ Shrek. Every fan under a certain age hops and prays that RJ chooses Smash Mouth as his walkup music.
Pier-Olivier Boucher - 10,25 (ATL) - It’s not every day that a French nobleman joins the ranks of professional baseball. Bon voyage on your baseball journey, Monsieur Boucher.
Bryson Hammer - 12,8 (COL) - I am a little disappointed that young Mr. Hammer is a pitcher. This name feels better suited for a hard-hitting corner infielder. But there is still plenty of potential for hammer-related wordplay on the mound. As a reliever, he can nail down some games. Or, one could say of his stuff that batters cannot touch this.
Paulshawn Pasqualotto - 12,13 (MIN) - Two first names? Check. Alliteration? Check. Too many syllables in both the first and last name? Check! Paulshawn Pasqualotto is the 80-grade name talent that every baseball scout dreams of discovering when they get into the business. Kudos to Minnesota for stealing this name so late in the draft.
Bjorn Johnson - 12,18 (MIL) - Jon Bois has dutifully called the world’s attention to The Bob Emergency across professional sports. But I come before you today, good people of baseball, to recognize a similar name tragedy. There have been exactly zero Bjorns in the history of Major League Baseball. Godspeed, Bjorn. We are all rooting for you. This pick also gets a bonus point because, if any team should have a Bjorn, it’s Milwaukee.
Jojo Ingrassia - 14,14 (BOS) - Just a fun name to say. A fun, lilting cadence and a last name that radiates pleasant feelings. Solid pickup in the 14th round for the Sox.
Edrick Felix - 14,15 (CHW) - The Soxes went back-to-back with fun names in the 14th round. “Edrick Felix” feels kind of like a Fighting Baseball name. It just doesn’t quite feel right as a real name, even if all the discrete parts feel fine.
Jaxon Jelkin - 14,26 (LAD) - We’re having more fun with alliteration in the 14th round. And unconventional spellings of more common names. And the last name “Jelkin” is simply fun to say. This is a quiet 60-grade baseball name. I assume he’ll be putting up a 135 ERA+ out of the Dodgers’ bullpen in a couple of years.
Caleb Ketchup - 15,10 (LAA) - Alliteration AND he’s named after the silliest of all the basic condiments? Count me in. Easy 80-grade name pickup for the Angels. Maybe this is what it will take to convince Ohtani to stay?
Qrey Lott - 15,17 (BAL) - I would like to commend Mr. and Mrs. Lott for giving us a Q which is not immediately followed by a U. Linguistic conventions be damned. Bonus points for having two monosyllabic names as well.
Kelena Sauer - 15,20 (TOR) - The winner of this year’s Name That Sounds The Most Like An Alcoholic Beverage goes to the Jays’ 15th round pick, Kelena Sauer.
Weston Eberly - 16,15 (CHW) - See entries for Jackson Baumeister and Trennor O’Donnell (above).
Hayden Snelsire - 17,19 (TB) - The Rays took Blake Snell in the first round of the draft 12 years ago. Now, they’ve taken the Snell-selection process one step further by grabbing a Snelsire. I tremble at what he might accomplish on the mound for two years before inevitably blowing out his UCL in Tampa.
Stone Russell - 18,5 (KC) - If you name your kid Stone, you are basically guaranteeing that he will be a confident person no matter what he does. Stone Russell is a name you can believe in. Nay, it is a name that compels you to believe. This name is destined to accomplish great things in life. And that is why he will not sign with the Kansas City Royals, and will become draft eligible again in three years.
Kannon Handy - 19,8 (COL) - See my infatuation with the name “Kannon” above. I see many bad puns about his arm strength coming in handy if he makes it to the Show. Get your mind out of the gutter if you thought I was going in a different direction with this. These name rankings are sophisticated and dignified.
Raudi Rodriguez - 19,10 (LAA) - Rowdy Raudi Rodriguez, one part rodeo clown, one part knock-off WWE wrestler, has somehow found his way into the MLB draft.
Adler Cecil - 19,27 (SD) - “Adler Cecil” is name in the center circle of a Venn diagram between Fighting Baseball names and Rich Aristocratic baseball names. “Adler” surely is not an actual name, and yet here it is. It sounds like it comes from wealth, as does the last name “Cecil”. Solid 60-grade baseball name, plucked in the penultimate round of this year’s draft by AJ Preller and Co.
B.Y. Choi - 20,27 (SD) - San Diego dominated the last two rounds when it comes to name talent. I do not think I have ever encountered anybody who goes by the initials “B.Y.” in any walk of life.
Thus concludes my list of the top names in this year's draft. Please feel free to highlight any great names that I may have missed or debate the validity of my name-ranking methods.
Edit: Links to previous years' lists, in case anyone is interested.
2022
2021
2020
2019
2018
submitted by eekbarbaderkle to baseball [link] [comments]
Every year, many great baseball names enter the minor league ranks via the draft. Some of these names receive much fanfare, while others slip by unnoticed. If the reader will permit me to noot my own horn a bit, I was among the first to identify Lars Nootbaar as an 80-grade name talent in my first version of this post back in 2018. What new sleeper names will emerge from this year's draft class? Only time will tell. But here are some of my personal top picks.
Noble Meyer - 1,10 (MIA) - If “Rhett Lowder” is a name that embodies rugged strength, Noble Meyer is a strong name on the other end of the spectrum. Noble derives his power from prestige, wealth, and an innate fear of what the Meyer lineage stands for. Will MLB hitters tackle the monarchy, or will the Meyer clan reign supreme?
Hurston Waldrep - 1,24 (ATL) - Late in the first round, and now we’re getting into the truly funky baseball names. For generations, many Great Baseball Names have been names that feel just a little bit clunky and made up. Neither “Hurston” nor “Waldrep” is an outrageously silly name. But neither is exactly conventional to the ear either. This is a name that was birthed to play baseball.
Kemp Alderman - 2,8 (MIA) - I like names that have a little bit of dissonance. “Alderman” is a name that suggests a bit of regality and prestige. Kemp, on the other hand, feels rough and rugged. It would be like if somebody named their child Noble Rhett.
Nazzan Zanetello - 2,11 (BOS) - My beloved Red Sox snagged some solid name talent with their 2nd round pick. Credit to u/Stock412 for observing that Nazzan’s first name is a palindrome. Also, I just like any name with an abundance of Z’s.
Jackson Baumeister - CB-B,2 (BAL) - Here we have our first entry of the 2023 draft into another class of baseball names. This is the class that sounds like it should either belong to a baseball player or a wealthy aristocrat, and nothing in between. If Jackson Baumeister was not playing baseball, he would be running amok at the local yacht club and letting everybody know that his father is an attorney.
Kiefer Lord - 3,16 (BAL) - Lord Kief comes to Baltimore in the summer of 2026.
Maui Ahuna - 4,16 (SF) - It’s not often that a person’s name tells you exactly what state they are from. Yet, I would be delighted by this name even more if it turned out he was born and raised in Montana.
Izack Tiger - 7,7 (TEX) - This one speaks for itself. Just a badass name, plain and simple. Bonus points to Mr. and Mrs. Tiger for foregoing the conventional spelling of “Isaac”. Now it’s their son’s turn to earn his stripes as a professional.
Owen Wild - 7,19 (TB) - The name itself is not too special. But a pitcher named “Wild” is always worth noting.
Jatnk Diaz - 8,6 (DET) - Jatnk Diaz makes the list because I have never seen the letters “tnk” combined together in that exact sequence. Except on occasions when I smash my hands randomly over the keyboard, perhaps. I can say with complete honesty that I am not sure how to pronounce this name.
Trennor O’Donnell - 8,14 (BOS) - See entry for “Jackson Baumeister” (above).
Craig Yoho - 8,18 (MIL) - That last name simply elicits joy. It’s fun to say. It’s fun to look at. It simultaneously makes me think of yogurt and a yo-yo.
Ixan Henderson - 8,20 (STL) - I had never come across the name “Ixan” before in all my years. But it apparently is a thing. Ixan is apparently the master of his own destiny, so it’s up to him to crack the big league roster, I guess.
Kannon Kemp - 8,27 (SD) - “Kannon” is just a fantastic baseball/children’s cartoon superhero name. Bonus points for alliteration and a nice sonic cadence as well.
RJ Schreck - 9,23 (SEA) - Like Shrek. The ogre. Get it? RJ Shrek. Every fan under a certain age hops and prays that RJ chooses Smash Mouth as his walkup music.
Pier-Olivier Boucher - 10,25 (ATL) - It’s not every day that a French nobleman joins the ranks of professional baseball. Bon voyage on your baseball journey, Monsieur Boucher.
Bryson Hammer - 12,8 (COL) - I am a little disappointed that young Mr. Hammer is a pitcher. This name feels better suited for a hard-hitting corner infielder. But there is still plenty of potential for hammer-related wordplay on the mound. As a reliever, he can nail down some games. Or, one could say of his stuff that batters cannot touch this.
Paulshawn Pasqualotto - 12,13 (MIN) - Two first names? Check. Alliteration? Check. Too many syllables in both the first and last name? Check! Paulshawn Pasqualotto is the 80-grade name talent that every baseball scout dreams of discovering when they get into the business. Kudos to Minnesota for stealing this name so late in the draft.
Bjorn Johnson - 12,18 (MIL) - Jon Bois has dutifully called the world’s attention to The Bob Emergency across professional sports. But I come before you today, good people of baseball, to recognize a similar name tragedy. There have been exactly zero Bjorns in the history of Major League Baseball. Godspeed, Bjorn. We are all rooting for you. This pick also gets a bonus point because, if any team should have a Bjorn, it’s Milwaukee.
Jojo Ingrassia - 14,14 (BOS) - Just a fun name to say. A fun, lilting cadence and a last name that radiates pleasant feelings. Solid pickup in the 14th round for the Sox.
Edrick Felix - 14,15 (CHW) - The Soxes went back-to-back with fun names in the 14th round. “Edrick Felix” feels kind of like a Fighting Baseball name. It just doesn’t quite feel right as a real name, even if all the discrete parts feel fine.
Jaxon Jelkin - 14,26 (LAD) - We’re having more fun with alliteration in the 14th round. And unconventional spellings of more common names. And the last name “Jelkin” is simply fun to say. This is a quiet 60-grade baseball name. I assume he’ll be putting up a 135 ERA+ out of the Dodgers’ bullpen in a couple of years.
Caleb Ketchup - 15,10 (LAA) - Alliteration AND he’s named after the silliest of all the basic condiments? Count me in. Easy 80-grade name pickup for the Angels. Maybe this is what it will take to convince Ohtani to stay?
Qrey Lott - 15,17 (BAL) - I would like to commend Mr. and Mrs. Lott for giving us a Q which is not immediately followed by a U. Linguistic conventions be damned. Bonus points for having two monosyllabic names as well.
Kelena Sauer - 15,20 (TOR) - The winner of this year’s Name That Sounds The Most Like An Alcoholic Beverage goes to the Jays’ 15th round pick, Kelena Sauer.
Weston Eberly - 16,15 (CHW) - See entries for Jackson Baumeister and Trennor O’Donnell (above).
Hayden Snelsire - 17,19 (TB) - The Rays took Blake Snell in the first round of the draft 12 years ago. Now, they’ve taken the Snell-selection process one step further by grabbing a Snelsire. I tremble at what he might accomplish on the mound for two years before inevitably blowing out his UCL in Tampa.
Stone Russell - 18,5 (KC) - If you name your kid Stone, you are basically guaranteeing that he will be a confident person no matter what he does. Stone Russell is a name you can believe in. Nay, it is a name that compels you to believe. This name is destined to accomplish great things in life. And that is why he will not sign with the Kansas City Royals, and will become draft eligible again in three years.
Kannon Handy - 19,8 (COL) - See my infatuation with the name “Kannon” above. I see many bad puns about his arm strength coming in handy if he makes it to the Show. Get your mind out of the gutter if you thought I was going in a different direction with this. These name rankings are sophisticated and dignified.
Raudi Rodriguez - 19,10 (LAA) - Rowdy Raudi Rodriguez, one part rodeo clown, one part knock-off WWE wrestler, has somehow found his way into the MLB draft.
Adler Cecil - 19,27 (SD) - “Adler Cecil” is name in the center circle of a Venn diagram between Fighting Baseball names and Rich Aristocratic baseball names. “Adler” surely is not an actual name, and yet here it is. It sounds like it comes from wealth, as does the last name “Cecil”. Solid 60-grade baseball name, plucked in the penultimate round of this year’s draft by AJ Preller and Co.
B.Y. Choi - 20,27 (SD) - San Diego dominated the last two rounds when it comes to name talent. I do not think I have ever encountered anybody who goes by the initials “B.Y.” in any walk of life.
Edit: Links to previous years' lists, in case anyone is interested.
2022
2021
2020
2019
2018
2023.05.19 15:39 Not_Mason_Pines Building a Canon-Compliant, Consistent and Comprehensive Scheme for Constructing Glyph Combos
Tl;dr: Yes, I did cram as much alliteration into that title as possible. Anyway, I set out to create my own system for making glyphs from scratch, using the basic concepts we’re shown in the show, here is my thought process all laid down along with the results. Since this has expanded over time to become a monstrous dissertation, the layout for this will be Basic Concepts, where all the basic concepts from the show are listed as the foundation for this system, followed by Basic Vocabulary, where the words for the glyph ‘language’ are made up, proceeded by Grammar Rules, where I think up the rules of the system and use what I’ve got so far to analyse the simpler combo glyphs made by Luz and co. The penultimate section is Shortcuts and Misc. Stuff, where I take a look at Philip’s WIP glyphs (seen at the start of Them’s the Breaks, Kid), attempt to figure out what they could mean in this system to yield the canon effects, and work in the miscellaneous stuff that appears on them. And lastly Conclusion, where I use this system to build a glyph combo from scratch for a spell that appears in the show.
Also, here's an Imgur album for every illustration coming up in this post. Having RES would probably also make things clearer.
I’ve gone pretty deep into this, so if something that I think makes perfect sense makes absolutely no sense to you, please comment and ask for clarification or something. Also, if you know of another system someone made for this, I couldn't find it, so I'd love to see those as well.
Quick note before I begin: This literal essay that's pushing the character limit on Reddit (dear God) is not me attempting to figure out how the actual system within the show works. To be honest, I don’t even think there is a fully worked-out system behind the scenes. Glyph combos were highly underutilised in the show, especially compared to single-glyph usage, so there wouldn’t be much point in building an entire system of rules for constructing them if you’d only need to use it in a few instances. Instead I think the crew simply put together some glyphs that intuitively felt like they’d work for the few glyph combos we do get, and then added some extra doodads for each to hint at the existence of a complex ruleset that would allow for four glyphs to reproduce every possible spell.
So yeah, I’m not setting out to make a system that perfectly explains every glyph combo we see, especially the advanced ones Philip uses (it feels weird to say Belos is using glyphs, dunno why). You certainly won’t see me crying in bed after this if what I come up with doesn’t fit perfectly with everything. Instead I’ll be taking the basic concepts the show has laid out for us, take some aspects/cues from the show’s glyph combos, and build a system with that for my own needs (I’m writing a crossover with Harry Potter and I want to have a consistent system for turning HP spells into glyph combos). Though I will at least attempt to budge things around to have the simpler glyph combos work out with whatever I come up with, and I’ll also see how closely I get the more complicated combos once that’s done. If things do happen to work out, then consider me a happy guy.
(Edit from me after having written everything out, about a day later: I did actually manage to read all the glyph combos from the show and get a meaning that corresponds to what happens in canon, so that was a very pleasant surprise. Except the teleportation glyph. I’m not even going to attempt reading it so I don’t actually know if that one would work with this system or not. But hey, here’s a nice prospect to look forward to if you attempt reading what has become a dissertation lol: some actual decent results).
a.1) There exist four basic glyphs, each with an elemental meaning: Light, Ice, Plant, and Fire. Though I’d like to say that Life is a more accurate descriptor for Plant, just that plants are the easiest living things to imagine and grow when using it (And growing sentient things might be a bit iffy).
a.2) There also is a fifth sorta glyph that I'll call a Null glyph, which has a glyph border but no symbol inside. Philip used it in his most complex glyphs and Luz used it in her mist generating glyph. I think a glyph that has no meaning on its own can be quite useful as a building block, either when a glyph is needed somewhere but you don’t want to use any of the actual glyphs, as a way to indicate absence, or as a place to input external variables (Interesting fact, on the golden glyph bubble thing Luz conjured as a Titan-hybrid there are five connected glyphs evenly spread out over it. You can see Light, Plant, and Fire most of the time, with Ice visible below as one of the two obstructed glyphs later, leaving the final one as Null if the trend of no repeats continues).
b) Glyphs can have small variations to their symbols, changing their effects slightly. Glyphs can also have a single or double border.
c) While size determines the power behind a glyph’s effect, intent also plays a large role, primarily in how and when a glyph activates, where/on what it generates its effect, and what shape and direction its effect has.
d.1) Glyphs can also have secondary meanings, which are related to their element. The only examples we get are Power, Colour and Reflection for the Light glyph (in the notes near the start of Echoes of the Past), though judging by the question marks they weren’t sure if those were the right words either, and Reflection fits less with Light and more with Ice imo.
d.2) We also know which meaning a glyph has ‘diffs 4 placement’, whatever that means.
e.1) Glyphs can be chained together into closed circuits, which can technically be any shape (rectangular in Luz’s neon shop sign) but are preferably circular. This allows for glyphs to be activated simultaneously.
e.2) Chaining multiples of the same basic glyph together allows for multiple separate instances of the same element to be summoned simultaneously.
e.3) Putting two different glyphs in a circuit can yield a new, merged, secondary element (like Doodle God or Little Alchemy or whatever floated your boat back then), the only known example from the show being Mist from Fire and Ice.
e.4) The basic glyphs are always drawn in the same orientation within glyph combos, with one known exception that I’ll ignore because it occurs in the teleportation glyph.
f.1) Glyphs are like a language that describe what you want the ambient magic to do, with the basic glyphs being the words and circuits being the sentences, though this seems distinct from how circuits function from e.2. This also seems to be closer to a natural language than something like a coding language, as there’s an actual being that you talk to which casts the magic for you (I’m assuming that using glyphs communicates telepathically with a subconscious part of Papa Titan’s soul, since it stops working once his soul isn’t there anymore to respond and use his magic in the way the glyphs instruct him to. I’m also saying his subconscious because having him consciously hear and act on magic instructions would be hell).
f.2) Context clues, synonyms, metaphors and subtext thus play a role in reading glyphs, as they do with natural languages. Though with intent added to the mix to disambiguate, though you can't just press a single glyph and expect your intent to do everything (God, wouldn’t it be nice if sending intent along with what you say was a thing we could do. So many avoided miscommunications).
f.3) Glyphs overlapping will cause confusion and glitches in the language, like overlaying text or saying words at the same time.
g) With these 4(/5) basic glyphs, chaining glyphs in circuits, and whatever rules, secondary elements from merging, and secondary meanings of glyphs exist, you can reproduce any spell a Boiling Isles witch can cast.
And with that out of the way, let’s get started.
For the four basic glyphs I added four sets of pairs of secondary meanings. To add my own twist and to make things feel more cohesive, each meaning is paired up with an opposite, colour-coded here with the glyph it’s paired up with. Three sets of pairs are paired up with meanings from one of the three other glyphs, and the fourth set is a pair of opposites from the same glyph.
And since this acts as a language (f.1) we should also add in the ability to use word types. In this case, nouns, verbs, adjectives and adverbs. From the word types, pronouns aren’t needed, and prepositions and conjunctions can be figured out through context or some indicator. So, for each meaning we can add the noun, verb, adjective and adverb variations where it’s possible in the above. And let’s also add the ability to use close synonyms when needed (f.2). Like Evolve being interchangeable with Change or Transform as a verb. Or the noun version of Obscure, Obscurity, being interchangeable with Secret. The intent of the user and context can be what decides which synonym is used (c).
Speaking of, we also need a way to indicate which form of word is being used for each glyph, so let’s bring in point b for this.
Let’s have the standard design of the glyph symbols indicate a noun, and the variant design of the symbols can indicate a verb (changing direction of diagonal stripes for Light, the kite to triangle for Ice, and the dot to small circle for Plant and Fire), and I’ll also add a use for the double border, which I’ll call the ad-der, since I’ll have it change the noun design into its adjective meaning and the verb design into the adverb version (it would’ve fit better if nouns were called jectives, or adjectives were called adnouns, but we can’t have everything). This probably won't perfectly match up, especially since some glyphs have more alternate designs, but that's a concession I'll make.
Also, just ignore how the secondary meanings in the first table aren’t all in noun form, I just put in what type of word fit best, but assume that the noun version applies to the standard design.
Now we have a small vocabulary built up, but from first glance it’s still missing a bunch of useful words that we’ll want this language to have to describe every spell (g), and only using words related to one of the elements will always keep this limited, even if you add more.
So let’s pull in point e.3 and see what words we can come up with when merging the four elements. Once again this will require coming up with things from scratch, since the only confirmed case is Fire and Ice into Mist. See my confusing attempt at a table here.
Since using multiples of the same glyph just allows for getting multiples of the same effect (e.2) I kept those combinations out. And since I want as extensive a vocabulary as possible, let’s allow for the order of combining elements to be important as well.
With the only instance of merging elements being with two, I’ll take the opportunity and make three-mergings possible as well, see my further confusing attempt here.
I once again added a restriction of not allowing multiples of the same element in a merging, to at least somewhat restrict the extent of this (since I don’t like leaving blanks).
As you can see, there aren’t as many traditional elements in these combinations, and a lot of abstract stuff, which does make things feel quite similar to the secondary meanings I already defined. But as I said before, you couldn’t get these abstract concepts just from associated meanings of one basic element, and there are a few new elemental things here too.
I also attempted going up one more time by using all four basic glyphs in mergings, trying to figure out combos between the 3-mergers and the final unused element, as well as pairing up 2-mergers with the ones coming from the two other unused elements, but those combinations had no decent solutions that I could come up with, so I’m keeping it to this.
Side-note, playing Doodle God when your base set has only one of the traditional elements (Fire) is actually pretty annoying and restrictive. Like, what useful, distinctive natural element can you come up with by combining Ice with Plant or Light, or Fire with Plant? Coal isn’t exactly a useful element to have in this vocabulary.
Either way, with that all done, we have built up a decent vocabulary. Now we can start setting up some basic ‘grammar’ rules and see how to put these words together.
So with that option discarded, the one remaining is that the specific position of a glyph on one of those circles/circuits is what determines meaning, like the circuit being divided into equal sectors (eight in this case, since I have eight secondary meanings per glyph). This can explain why all glyphs are typically drawn in the same direction, so the general orientation of an entire construction is set and the location of a glyph is easy to determine from a glance. It also explains why circuits are preferably drawn as circles rather than something like rectangles, since on a circle divided into equal sectors it’s much easier to spot which sectoangle a glyph is in, compared to using a rectangle or some other weird shape.
And since we have very little examples of glyph combos in the show, let alone explicit confirmation of which placement would be which meaning, let’s once again assign the placements ourselves, though with some reference towards the simple glyph combos we see in the show. See my attempt at making a usable diagram here.
As another twist to add something more interesting, I have the pairs of opposite meanings sitting on opposite ends of the circle.
In this way, a glyph without a circuit is simply its elemental meaning, but when you want a secondary meaning, you can indicate which one you want by putting the associated basic glyph on the specific sector of the circle (f.2), more specifically centred exactly on one of the cardinals or the diagonals, meaning top, right, bottom-left etc. (a neat consequence from using eight secondary meanings, and another reason for me to not expand that specific vocabulary). See an example here.
So now let’s get to the meat and potatoes, how a basic glyph combo is set up.
The first observation is that glyph combos almost always have some glyph at the centre. This central focus or anchor seems to determine what element is used in the spell, or how the spell is expressed, similar to being the core word of a sentence. For example, the Light glyph in both the invisibility spell and safety hover bends light in the first case, and emits a soft glow when active in the second. For Fire, Philip’s teleportation glyph emits a pillar of flame when activated. As a side-note, we also see from Philip’s later glyphs that, in my interpretation, a secondary meaning can also be used as a focus/anchor (Fire on bottom-left for water fountain (Motion) and Plant on bottom-left for monster arm (Evolve/Change)). I’ll get to them later, but merged elements can also be used as the central point. A Null glyph can also be a central glyph, and doesn’t have to be drawn since context excludes any other option of being the centre instead (f.2).
I also think that, in general, Ice and Plant glyphs will enact a spell more gradually, while Light and Fire glyphs will do so quickly/almost instantaneously. Also, Plant and Fire glyphs make a spell grow over time, while Ice and Light glyphs don’t. But that’s just an idle thought.
To make actual sentences with other words, however, we also need to add further descriptors on what this central/anchored word should do. This is where the glyph circuits come in, forming concentric circles centred on the central glyph. All glyphs and their corresponding meanings on this circle are direct descriptors for the central glyph that apply at the same time (e.1). Let’s call these descriptor circuits.
One quick note, with this setup we can run into the problem of needing two different glyphs to be at the same location, causing an overlap (f.3). To avoid this, let’s add the ability to draw a circle tangent to this point, keep one of the two glyphs on the tangent point as a ‘tangent glyph’, and move the other to somewhere else on the circle. See illustration here. Let’s call it a spacer circle/circuit. In the case of three or even all four glyphs overlapping, all can go somewhere on the circle. The position of the glyphs on this circuit doesn’t matter, but at least one should be off-grid, i.e. not centred on cardinals or diagonals (to clear up distinction issues later).
We also see from the teleport glyph that you can have multiple descriptor circuits all concentrically surrounding the central glyph. In the case of a second circuit, I’ll take it as meaning that the glyph combination it encircles can already count as its own nested spell, and this second circuit applies to the entirety of the enclosed spell. The reading order for this would thus be from centre to edge. I also think each added layer of circuit to the central focus produces a spell that can technically function on its own, even if it might be too unwieldy or useless or have dangerous side-effects without further description.
But what if there’s a nested spell that’s separate from the one already built up from the central glyph, an entire spell that needs to be applied to the main spell along with other descriptors in the same circuit? In that case we could attach a different glyph combo, like a nested sub descriptor circuit (subcircuit for short), onto one or more of the main descriptor circuits (if more exist). This subcircuit has the same rules as the main circuit, except it may not have a central glyph if it matches that of the main one, and might only work on other spells. In short, it's like a subroutine (if we’re pulling in coding language).
To also distinguish it from the previous spacer circle, let’s specify that a subcircuit has a glyph on an intersection point with other circuits, an ‘intersecting glyph’, rather than on a tangent point as a ‘tangent glyph’. We can also use this by saying that the glyphs on a subcircuit that occupy an intersection with another circle indicate that the subcircuit applies to those other circles. In order to line things up, you’d have to play with the size and location of the circle in relation to the main circle. Though you’d also have to keep in mind that glyphs on an intersection could have multiple meanings with their different placements for each of the different circles, which may be unwanted. To combat that, let’s add a rule that a glyph on an intersection always applies its meaning only to the more nested or otherwise smallest circle of the intersection, unless specified otherwise (we’ll get back to that later), and if there’s no other way you could use a Null glyph to add a connection (a.2).
With the main descriptor circuits, subcircuits, and spacer circuits, there’s only one more that is needed to make sure every bit of the vocabulary can be applied.
To add the merged/secondary elements from before, let’s add a merger circuit, which has the two or three elements you want to merge to form the secondary element, and let’s have them all equally spaced, reading the order of elements from left-most and moving clockwise.
To make sure this can be distinct from the sub- and spacer circuits, let’s say that, unlike the prior two, it has both a glyph only on an intersection point (or multiple) and at least one of the glyphs on a merger circuit is off-grid. In the case of 2-mergers that’d have to be both, and for 3-mergers you’re guaranteed to have at least one off-grid anyway (The joys of matching up a circle divided into equal threes with a circle divided into equal eighths). So now a subcircuit only has an intersecting glyph (or more) and all glyphs on the grid, spacer circuits only have a tangent glyph (or more) and at least one glyph off-grid, and merger circuits only have an intersecting glyph (or more) and at least one glyph off-grid.
This actually leaves open another useful combination, a circuit with only a tangent glyph (or more) and all glyphs on-grid. Let’s call this last combination a specification circuit, which adds extra descriptors onto only the glyph at the tangent point. It’s not a spell on its own, but adds adjectives and adverbs to the noun or verb it’s tangent to the other circuit with.
As a quick overview for some visualisation, here’s a glyph spell I put together, containing each of the circuits I’ve mentioned above, and with glyphs randomly thrown in. Though this was just set up for explanation purposes, let’s also try an attempt at reading said glyph with the rules I’ve set up and see if anything reasonable pops up (and keep your look-up diagrams with you. Can’t believe I made actual look-up diagrams).
Surprisingly, though maybe it’s just me spotting patterns in nothing, this isn’t complete gibberish, and I’d interpret this spell as being something that connects memories that are in danger of being absorbed by someone else to light balls, but also using it to order them and move them around, as long as the subject is aware of it happening. Sounds a bit like a mindscape defence against mind-reading. So yeah, that’s the basics out of the way.
Let’s see how this works out with the basic glyph combos in the show.
Invisibility glyph: Lightened (centre, adjective) coloured (top-left, adjective) transparency (bottom-right, noun) order (bottom-left, noun) → Subject becomes lightened by coloured transparency through order → Invisibility through camouflage. Side-note, the bottom-left glyph can be absent and the glyph still works, as seen in its first instance. But I think the ‘order’ allows for multiple to be camouflaged by the one glyph.
Safety hover glyph: Light (centre, noun) stillness (top-right, noun) movement (bottom-left, noun) → Use light on movement to make stillness → Stop subject’s movement instantly.
Snow/Command glyph (copyright, Lilith): Null (centre, not drawn, surrounding circle isn’t a merger circuit (repeats of Ice) so isn’t acting as central glyph, meaning the empty space is an implied Null glyph) power (top, adjective) weakness (bottom, noun) preserved (left, adjective) removed (right, adjective) → The external object touching the centre is removed, this process is powered through weakness, yet the object is preserved → Break down this object through sheer power but keep the debris (In the case of the ice blob, break it down and powder it into snow)
So that turned out pretty well (Though I did already say I ordered the diagram with secondary glyph meanings to at least make sense of the basic glyphs).
Let’s go one final step further and see what we can use from what Philip eventually used in his glyphs.
h) Condense and simplify glyphs as much as possible.
Obviously, for usability it’s always best to find a way to get the same spell/effect with a glyph that’s easier to draw. And since this system is like a language, it’s like saying there are multiple ways of saying the same thing, with some faster to say than others.
But more than that, it’s also like shortening actual sentences with contractions, abbreviations, and finding that one specific obscure word in the Thesaurus that you previously had to use several words for to describe. For example, if you have multiple non-concentric circuits you could attempt orientating them to have multiple instances of the same glyphs overlap and work from there.
Another thing that was mentioned a while back was how glyphs on intersections only apply to the smaller circuit, unless specified. Well, let’s say this can be specified by drawing a straight line from the intersection glyph to the central glyph of the bigger circle, indicating it contributes simultaneously to both circles with two separate meanings.
This way of using straight lines to show a glyph is pulling double- or triple-duty can also be applied to drawing a line between two glyphs on the same circuit. This would make use of the previously discarded concept for how glyph meanings are ‘diff 4 placement’, indicating that the connected glyphs also have additional meanings based on their relative placement to one another.
For example, let’s take Philip’s petrification glyph.
Petrification glyph: Iced (centre, adjective) removed (right, adjective) [Change (relative bottom-left, noun)] preserved (left, adjective) organism (bottom, noun) [Stilled (relative top-right, adjective) inorganic (relative top, adjective)] → Organism is removed but preserved, by having changed the stilled organism into something inorganic.
That already works amazingly on its own, though there’s also this funky plant glyph that’s unconnected to a circle but still connected to other glyphs by straight lines.
Something that hasn’t been tackled yet is how to actually use the primary meaning of the basic glyphs outside of being the central focus, because there’s no other place in the current rules for the basic glyphs to apply their elemental meaning on anything. So let’s make it so that a basic glyph that’s disconnected from a circle still has primary meaning, and is applied to other glyphs with straight lines. In this case that would add that iced life is preserved.
…This obviously doesn’t work too well since in canon the petrification is permanent and kills the petrified person, but I’ll gladly hop onto the convenient lifeboat that is the context of this glyph being incomplete. I’d say Philip was originally experimenting with a way of turning someone into stone as a defensive spell, but a) didn’t know how to express stone yet, and b) didn’t want it to be permanent, since that would be pretty iffy unless he already has all the power over the Boiling Isles and nobody attempting to question him for killing people. So this original glyph just turned the subject ‘inorganic’, which is apparently just some weak dust, so the preserving of life to make it reversible is pretty useless here anyway. Clearly not complete yet. In the completed, proper petrification glyph, the small Plant glyph with the two connections would be gone to make it irreversible, and a merger circle of Fire and Plant (Earth) with the two glyphs intersecting with another, appropriately sized merger circle with Ice as the third glyph (Hard), bringing a total circuit for (Hard Earth = Stone).
Either way, let’s add elemental modification to the toolkit.
Let’s go to the other three of Philip’s WIP glyphs and try to make sense of them, plus whatever extra features were added. First up, water fountain.
Water fountain glyph: Sever (centre (top-left), verb (there’s no real noun for ‘sever’, and no double border so all that’s left is verb)) tangible (top-left, adjective) still (top-right, adjective) transparent (bottom-right, adjective). We also have some funky spiral lines connecting the three to the central point. My current translation would be ‘sever something here that’s tangible, still, and transparent’. My guess is that my boi Phil was trying to make a glyph that could isolate groundwater and get it out of the ground, probably for survival purposes since groundwater would be drinkable compared to the Boiling Sea and Rain (Luz assumes the glyph is meant to make a water fountain, but that’s just what she sees the glyph doing, not what its intended use is). Obviously he didn’t know how to properly express ‘groundwater’ at this point, or thought it was too bulky to write down that way, and went with a vague description of ‘tangible but transparent and still (not moving in the ground)’ instead. I think the spiralling lines here are supposed to provide a direction for the motion (there’s no motion glyph in here, i.e. Fire bottom-left, but severing water from the ground would probably push it up and give it some motion regardless, so the lines help direct it). It would make sense, since just bringing water straight up would make it fall back down on the ground, so you need a little trajectory to have it land in a gathering bowl next to the glyph. That said, let’s add motion lines.
Next up, monster arm.
The new feature here is a partial circle segment capped off by two fire glyphs. The first thing that comes to mind for me is that this is supposed to be an abbreviation for when you have to draw the same glyph on neighbouring locations of the circuit. So instead you only draw the correct glyph at the ends of the sequence and let the line imply the rest of the meanings involved. In this case: Evolution/Change (centre (bottom-left), noun) Protect Decay Weak Motion Hurt Sever Deception (right-to-top (clockwise), nouns), and on a second circuit ring, Evolution (bottom-left, noun). My current thoughts are that the ground or whatever sits at the central circle undergoes a change into something that can protect, move, hurt, sever, and deceive. And whatever that thing becomes is then told to continue evolving/changing/adapting.
What I think makes this glyph a failed WIP is that, though the segment already excludes Chaos (top-right), which would be pretty detrimental for a construct you want to order around, it does still include Weak and Decay (bottom and bottom-right), which makes the monster arm physically weak, prone to damage and slowly breaking down over time, as demonstrated in the episode. But Philips didn’t want to let go of using the segment to draw only two Fire glyphs instead of five either, as further breaking up the segment would isolate the Fire glyph on the right, which would separate the glyph from the system and turn it into a separate one that happens to occupy the same space, and a full circuit would require drawing five glyphs too). I think a good solution that Philip probably used in the completed version would be to use the Null glyph to further exclude the meanings that aren’t desired while keeping the full line segment intact.
Definitely useful to simplify the drawing process, so let’s add sequence segments as well.
Last of the WIP glyphs: the tornado glyph, which is the only one that actually works decently, on a small scale anyway, and saved for last for good reason.
We now have some sort of combination of circle segments positioned in layers, and direct line connections with both disconnected and connected element glyphs, as well as straight radial lines coming from the central glyph.
Since these Fire glyphs are on actual circular segments, let’s begin simply with the normal secondary meanings.
Tornado glyph: Icy (centre, adjective) Emitted (bottom-left, adjective) Sever (top-left, verb) Protection (right, noun) Weakness (bottom, noun).
Alright, so it took a while, but if I really want to make sense of this I’ll have to budge some parts of the word type indicators in the right direction. In this case, the bottom glyph will be changed to the adjective version, and the right glyph turned into its verb version.
To start with, as a circle segment, the line trajectory is only associated with Fire, and with the radial line segments in the bottom-left and bottom-right we’ll add those meanings as well. And the connection to the bottom-left Light glyph means something as well. So we now have Emitted (Light, bottom-left) Movement (Fire, bottom-left) Weak (Fire, bottom) Decays (Fire, bottom-right), so ‘an emitted movement that’s weak and decays’. It’s also connected to the circle segment one layer deeper, which has Protect (Fire, right) Decay (Fire, bottom-right). So we have ‘an emitted movement that’s weak and decays, but is protected from decay’. Since the line segment connects the outer circuit line (with the Light glyph) to the central glyph, and the outer glyphs apply to the inner ones, we also add some directionality. So now it becomes ‘an emitted, weak movement that decays as it moves inwards, but is protected from slowing down in total’. That’s probably just me budging everything, but that sounds like how the movement within a vortex of air behaves.
Lastly, the top circle segment has Sever (Fire, top-left) and Chaos (Fire, top-right), and has no connection between the outside circuit and the central glyph. So I’d say ‘sever chaos’ i.e. counteract the chaotic movement of the already existing air, and thus making it organised when it begins moving. Altogether, this glyph describes an ‘emitted, uniform motion that decays as it goes inwards but remains stable overall’. It might’ve been a bit wonky to get here, but none of the rules I’ve made have been contradicted yet and it actually got a decently accurate reading out of it.
Technically I could also cover Philip’s Teleportation glyph or the unlocking glyph Belos used to enter the Grimwalker area in the Skull, but that’s a) too much effort and probably doesn’t match up with my meanings for the former, but it can be left up as an exercise to the reader. And b) the additional rules the latter glyph could imply would probably be far too complex and unnecessary for this post (which is at the character limit), or for making glyphs altogether. We gotta keep in mind that that glyph is from someone who’s been experimenting and drawing for 400 years, so the previous simplifications/tricks I covered in the last section would be far more amplified and complex.
Either way, with that all finished up, let’s use it to build a glyph from scratch that mimics a complex spell we see used in canon but doesn’t have a glyph counterpart.
For this, I’ll use the ‘quick-step’ spell we see Eda and Lilith use, where they turn into flame and quickly move elsewhere, reappearing at the end. Hunter does something similar with Flapjack, but there it’s done with light.
So, the central component of this entire spell will be moving. And the descriptor circuit for that movement will be something like ‘[move] a person quickly along a path’. ‘Quickly’ here can be made with a merger circuit. Then, if I want to recreate the spell accurately, the path needs to be specified to be somewhat short, so you can’t just use it to teleport somewhere far away. This can easily be done by specifying that it has to be visible for the caster before they cast it, using a specification circuit.
The next component will be the turning the person into fire. This sounds like a spell on its own, even if it’s pretty deadly, so it’ll be a nested spell that links to the main circuit through a subcircuit. The subcircuit will then be something like ‘change person into fire’. Since this spell is still very much deadly on its own, it’ll also need its own specifier saying that the person should be preserved during the change, for protection.
Lastly, it still needs a way to reverse this change from fire back to person once the spell has reached the end of the connection. In this case, ‘Reverse’ and ‘Ending’ can both be made from merger circuits.
Now we just need to add all those circuits together, making sure each type of circle has the right border glyphs and glyph positioning (tangent or intersecting, on-grid or off-grid), and lastly the condition of ‘reverse transformation spell at end of trajectory’ needs to be properly linked up. And with that we get the final Quick-Step glyph here.
Some additional notes. The top circuit didn’t technically have to go at the top-right, but it did need to intersect with the main circuit through one of its glyphs. The only other place where it wouldn’t have overlapped with the main circuit’s glyphs would’ve been in the top-left, with the merger circuit for ‘Fast/Quick’ needing to rotate down on the main circuit a bit to accommodate. But in that case the series of connected circuits for the ‘reverse at end of trajectory’ would’ve been impossible to draw compactly. Either they’d go straight over the main circuit, or going around the circuit would require giant circles.
And then there’s also the inside line segments of the subcircuit. I haven’t established the rules for how those would work, and I’m playing it a bit loose there, but basically the places where the circles jump down in layer (shorter radius) is where the glyphs on the outside ring slot in. If the segment had jumped down a layer where a glyph from the outside hadn’t been connected into it, then it would’ve been the corresponding definition for the Fire glyph at the start of the circuit. The reading order here is also from the Fire glyph towards the centre. And lastly, the outside circuit of the spell ‘organism change inorganic’ does need disambiguation, since it could also be read as ‘inorganic change organism’. The direction of how the inside circuit approaches the middle helps disambiguate that, giving it a defined reading order, which is then read in reverse once the ‘Reverse’ circuit comes into play.
And…wow, I think that’s all. I’ve spent an entire day typing this out (plus way too many days of experimenting with things and coming up with some rules), and few people will probably see this, but damn that was satisfying to write out.
For those of you who read all the way to the end, or God forbid actually took the time to take it all in, thank you very much!
…I’m going to bed.
submitted by Not_Mason_Pines to TheOwlHouse [link] [comments]
Also, here's an Imgur album for every illustration coming up in this post. Having RES would probably also make things clearer.
I’ve gone pretty deep into this, so if something that I think makes perfect sense makes absolutely no sense to you, please comment and ask for clarification or something. Also, if you know of another system someone made for this, I couldn't find it, so I'd love to see those as well.
So yeah, I’m not setting out to make a system that perfectly explains every glyph combo we see, especially the advanced ones Philip uses (it feels weird to say Belos is using glyphs, dunno why). You certainly won’t see me crying in bed after this if what I come up with doesn’t fit perfectly with everything. Instead I’ll be taking the basic concepts the show has laid out for us, take some aspects/cues from the show’s glyph combos, and build a system with that for my own needs (I’m writing a crossover with Harry Potter and I want to have a consistent system for turning HP spells into glyph combos). Though I will at least attempt to budge things around to have the simpler glyph combos work out with whatever I come up with, and I’ll also see how closely I get the more complicated combos once that’s done. If things do happen to work out, then consider me a happy guy.
(Edit from me after having written everything out, about a day later: I did actually manage to read all the glyph combos from the show and get a meaning that corresponds to what happens in canon, so that was a very pleasant surprise. Except the teleportation glyph. I’m not even going to attempt reading it so I don’t actually know if that one would work with this system or not. But hey, here’s a nice prospect to look forward to if you attempt reading what has become a dissertation lol: some actual decent results).
Basic Concepts
Let’s list the basic concepts we can use from observing the show first.a.1) There exist four basic glyphs, each with an elemental meaning: Light, Ice, Plant, and Fire. Though I’d like to say that Life is a more accurate descriptor for Plant, just that plants are the easiest living things to imagine and grow when using it (And growing sentient things might be a bit iffy).
a.2) There also is a fifth sorta glyph that I'll call a Null glyph, which has a glyph border but no symbol inside. Philip used it in his most complex glyphs and Luz used it in her mist generating glyph. I think a glyph that has no meaning on its own can be quite useful as a building block, either when a glyph is needed somewhere but you don’t want to use any of the actual glyphs, as a way to indicate absence, or as a place to input external variables (Interesting fact, on the golden glyph bubble thing Luz conjured as a Titan-hybrid there are five connected glyphs evenly spread out over it. You can see Light, Plant, and Fire most of the time, with Ice visible below as one of the two obstructed glyphs later, leaving the final one as Null if the trend of no repeats continues).
b) Glyphs can have small variations to their symbols, changing their effects slightly. Glyphs can also have a single or double border.
c) While size determines the power behind a glyph’s effect, intent also plays a large role, primarily in how and when a glyph activates, where/on what it generates its effect, and what shape and direction its effect has.
d.1) Glyphs can also have secondary meanings, which are related to their element. The only examples we get are Power, Colour and Reflection for the Light glyph (in the notes near the start of Echoes of the Past), though judging by the question marks they weren’t sure if those were the right words either, and Reflection fits less with Light and more with Ice imo.
d.2) We also know which meaning a glyph has ‘diffs 4 placement’, whatever that means.
e.1) Glyphs can be chained together into closed circuits, which can technically be any shape (rectangular in Luz’s neon shop sign) but are preferably circular. This allows for glyphs to be activated simultaneously.
e.2) Chaining multiples of the same basic glyph together allows for multiple separate instances of the same element to be summoned simultaneously.
e.3) Putting two different glyphs in a circuit can yield a new, merged, secondary element (like Doodle God or Little Alchemy or whatever floated your boat back then), the only known example from the show being Mist from Fire and Ice.
e.4) The basic glyphs are always drawn in the same orientation within glyph combos, with one known exception that I’ll ignore because it occurs in the teleportation glyph.
f.1) Glyphs are like a language that describe what you want the ambient magic to do, with the basic glyphs being the words and circuits being the sentences, though this seems distinct from how circuits function from e.2. This also seems to be closer to a natural language than something like a coding language, as there’s an actual being that you talk to which casts the magic for you (I’m assuming that using glyphs communicates telepathically with a subconscious part of Papa Titan’s soul, since it stops working once his soul isn’t there anymore to respond and use his magic in the way the glyphs instruct him to. I’m also saying his subconscious because having him consciously hear and act on magic instructions would be hell).
f.2) Context clues, synonyms, metaphors and subtext thus play a role in reading glyphs, as they do with natural languages. Though with intent added to the mix to disambiguate, though you can't just press a single glyph and expect your intent to do everything (God, wouldn’t it be nice if sending intent along with what you say was a thing we could do. So many avoided miscommunications).
f.3) Glyphs overlapping will cause confusion and glitches in the language, like overlaying text or saying words at the same time.
g) With these 4(/5) basic glyphs, chaining glyphs in circuits, and whatever rules, secondary elements from merging, and secondary meanings of glyphs exist, you can reproduce any spell a Boiling Isles witch can cast.
And with that out of the way, let’s get started.
Basic Vocabulary
First things first, a vocabulary of only four words (a.1) is far too little to make a decent system out of, so it’s a good thing we have point d.1 to take from. Sadly we’re seriously lacking in any confirmed secondary meanings to have a decent vocabulary, so I’ll already have to resort to thinking up my own. Here is what I’ve come up with.For the four basic glyphs I added four sets of pairs of secondary meanings. To add my own twist and to make things feel more cohesive, each meaning is paired up with an opposite, colour-coded here with the glyph it’s paired up with. Three sets of pairs are paired up with meanings from one of the three other glyphs, and the fourth set is a pair of opposites from the same glyph.
And since this acts as a language (f.1) we should also add in the ability to use word types. In this case, nouns, verbs, adjectives and adverbs. From the word types, pronouns aren’t needed, and prepositions and conjunctions can be figured out through context or some indicator. So, for each meaning we can add the noun, verb, adjective and adverb variations where it’s possible in the above. And let’s also add the ability to use close synonyms when needed (f.2). Like Evolve being interchangeable with Change or Transform as a verb. Or the noun version of Obscure, Obscurity, being interchangeable with Secret. The intent of the user and context can be what decides which synonym is used (c).
Speaking of, we also need a way to indicate which form of word is being used for each glyph, so let’s bring in point b for this.
Let’s have the standard design of the glyph symbols indicate a noun, and the variant design of the symbols can indicate a verb (changing direction of diagonal stripes for Light, the kite to triangle for Ice, and the dot to small circle for Plant and Fire), and I’ll also add a use for the double border, which I’ll call the ad-der, since I’ll have it change the noun design into its adjective meaning and the verb design into the adverb version (it would’ve fit better if nouns were called jectives, or adjectives were called adnouns, but we can’t have everything). This probably won't perfectly match up, especially since some glyphs have more alternate designs, but that's a concession I'll make.
Also, just ignore how the secondary meanings in the first table aren’t all in noun form, I just put in what type of word fit best, but assume that the noun version applies to the standard design.
Now we have a small vocabulary built up, but from first glance it’s still missing a bunch of useful words that we’ll want this language to have to describe every spell (g), and only using words related to one of the elements will always keep this limited, even if you add more.
So let’s pull in point e.3 and see what words we can come up with when merging the four elements. Once again this will require coming up with things from scratch, since the only confirmed case is Fire and Ice into Mist. See my confusing attempt at a table here.
Since using multiples of the same glyph just allows for getting multiples of the same effect (e.2) I kept those combinations out. And since I want as extensive a vocabulary as possible, let’s allow for the order of combining elements to be important as well.
With the only instance of merging elements being with two, I’ll take the opportunity and make three-mergings possible as well, see my further confusing attempt here.
I once again added a restriction of not allowing multiples of the same element in a merging, to at least somewhat restrict the extent of this (since I don’t like leaving blanks).
As you can see, there aren’t as many traditional elements in these combinations, and a lot of abstract stuff, which does make things feel quite similar to the secondary meanings I already defined. But as I said before, you couldn’t get these abstract concepts just from associated meanings of one basic element, and there are a few new elemental things here too.
I also attempted going up one more time by using all four basic glyphs in mergings, trying to figure out combos between the 3-mergers and the final unused element, as well as pairing up 2-mergers with the ones coming from the two other unused elements, but those combinations had no decent solutions that I could come up with, so I’m keeping it to this.
Side-note, playing Doodle God when your base set has only one of the traditional elements (Fire) is actually pretty annoying and restrictive. Like, what useful, distinctive natural element can you come up with by combining Ice with Plant or Light, or Fire with Plant? Coal isn’t exactly a useful element to have in this vocabulary.
Either way, with that all done, we have built up a decent vocabulary. Now we can start setting up some basic ‘grammar’ rules and see how to put these words together.
Grammar Rules
Let’s start with figuring out how we can indicate which secondary meaning a glyph has. All we know is that secondary meaning ‘diffs 4 placement’ (d.2). As I see it, there are only two possible interpretations. Either it means the placement of one glyph relative to the others decides meaning, which would get far too complex as a basis to build rules on (And just imagine, in the case of a small combo of five glyphs you’d already have twenty total relative positions to take into account, i.e. twenty possible different meanings).So with that option discarded, the one remaining is that the specific position of a glyph on one of those circles/circuits is what determines meaning, like the circuit being divided into equal sectors (eight in this case, since I have eight secondary meanings per glyph). This can explain why all glyphs are typically drawn in the same direction, so the general orientation of an entire construction is set and the location of a glyph is easy to determine from a glance. It also explains why circuits are preferably drawn as circles rather than something like rectangles, since on a circle divided into equal sectors it’s much easier to spot which sectoangle a glyph is in, compared to using a rectangle or some other weird shape.
And since we have very little examples of glyph combos in the show, let alone explicit confirmation of which placement would be which meaning, let’s once again assign the placements ourselves, though with some reference towards the simple glyph combos we see in the show. See my attempt at making a usable diagram here.
As another twist to add something more interesting, I have the pairs of opposite meanings sitting on opposite ends of the circle.
In this way, a glyph without a circuit is simply its elemental meaning, but when you want a secondary meaning, you can indicate which one you want by putting the associated basic glyph on the specific sector of the circle (f.2), more specifically centred exactly on one of the cardinals or the diagonals, meaning top, right, bottom-left etc. (a neat consequence from using eight secondary meanings, and another reason for me to not expand that specific vocabulary). See an example here.
So now let’s get to the meat and potatoes, how a basic glyph combo is set up.
The first observation is that glyph combos almost always have some glyph at the centre. This central focus or anchor seems to determine what element is used in the spell, or how the spell is expressed, similar to being the core word of a sentence. For example, the Light glyph in both the invisibility spell and safety hover bends light in the first case, and emits a soft glow when active in the second. For Fire, Philip’s teleportation glyph emits a pillar of flame when activated. As a side-note, we also see from Philip’s later glyphs that, in my interpretation, a secondary meaning can also be used as a focus/anchor (Fire on bottom-left for water fountain (Motion) and Plant on bottom-left for monster arm (Evolve/Change)). I’ll get to them later, but merged elements can also be used as the central point. A Null glyph can also be a central glyph, and doesn’t have to be drawn since context excludes any other option of being the centre instead (f.2).
I also think that, in general, Ice and Plant glyphs will enact a spell more gradually, while Light and Fire glyphs will do so quickly/almost instantaneously. Also, Plant and Fire glyphs make a spell grow over time, while Ice and Light glyphs don’t. But that’s just an idle thought.
To make actual sentences with other words, however, we also need to add further descriptors on what this central/anchored word should do. This is where the glyph circuits come in, forming concentric circles centred on the central glyph. All glyphs and their corresponding meanings on this circle are direct descriptors for the central glyph that apply at the same time (e.1). Let’s call these descriptor circuits.
One quick note, with this setup we can run into the problem of needing two different glyphs to be at the same location, causing an overlap (f.3). To avoid this, let’s add the ability to draw a circle tangent to this point, keep one of the two glyphs on the tangent point as a ‘tangent glyph’, and move the other to somewhere else on the circle. See illustration here. Let’s call it a spacer circle/circuit. In the case of three or even all four glyphs overlapping, all can go somewhere on the circle. The position of the glyphs on this circuit doesn’t matter, but at least one should be off-grid, i.e. not centred on cardinals or diagonals (to clear up distinction issues later).
We also see from the teleport glyph that you can have multiple descriptor circuits all concentrically surrounding the central glyph. In the case of a second circuit, I’ll take it as meaning that the glyph combination it encircles can already count as its own nested spell, and this second circuit applies to the entirety of the enclosed spell. The reading order for this would thus be from centre to edge. I also think each added layer of circuit to the central focus produces a spell that can technically function on its own, even if it might be too unwieldy or useless or have dangerous side-effects without further description.
But what if there’s a nested spell that’s separate from the one already built up from the central glyph, an entire spell that needs to be applied to the main spell along with other descriptors in the same circuit? In that case we could attach a different glyph combo, like a nested sub descriptor circuit (subcircuit for short), onto one or more of the main descriptor circuits (if more exist). This subcircuit has the same rules as the main circuit, except it may not have a central glyph if it matches that of the main one, and might only work on other spells. In short, it's like a subroutine (if we’re pulling in coding language).
To also distinguish it from the previous spacer circle, let’s specify that a subcircuit has a glyph on an intersection point with other circuits, an ‘intersecting glyph’, rather than on a tangent point as a ‘tangent glyph’. We can also use this by saying that the glyphs on a subcircuit that occupy an intersection with another circle indicate that the subcircuit applies to those other circles. In order to line things up, you’d have to play with the size and location of the circle in relation to the main circle. Though you’d also have to keep in mind that glyphs on an intersection could have multiple meanings with their different placements for each of the different circles, which may be unwanted. To combat that, let’s add a rule that a glyph on an intersection always applies its meaning only to the more nested or otherwise smallest circle of the intersection, unless specified otherwise (we’ll get back to that later), and if there’s no other way you could use a Null glyph to add a connection (a.2).
With the main descriptor circuits, subcircuits, and spacer circuits, there’s only one more that is needed to make sure every bit of the vocabulary can be applied.
To add the merged/secondary elements from before, let’s add a merger circuit, which has the two or three elements you want to merge to form the secondary element, and let’s have them all equally spaced, reading the order of elements from left-most and moving clockwise.
To make sure this can be distinct from the sub- and spacer circuits, let’s say that, unlike the prior two, it has both a glyph only on an intersection point (or multiple) and at least one of the glyphs on a merger circuit is off-grid. In the case of 2-mergers that’d have to be both, and for 3-mergers you’re guaranteed to have at least one off-grid anyway (The joys of matching up a circle divided into equal threes with a circle divided into equal eighths). So now a subcircuit only has an intersecting glyph (or more) and all glyphs on the grid, spacer circuits only have a tangent glyph (or more) and at least one glyph off-grid, and merger circuits only have an intersecting glyph (or more) and at least one glyph off-grid.
This actually leaves open another useful combination, a circuit with only a tangent glyph (or more) and all glyphs on-grid. Let’s call this last combination a specification circuit, which adds extra descriptors onto only the glyph at the tangent point. It’s not a spell on its own, but adds adjectives and adverbs to the noun or verb it’s tangent to the other circuit with.
As a quick overview for some visualisation, here’s a glyph spell I put together, containing each of the circuits I’ve mentioned above, and with glyphs randomly thrown in. Though this was just set up for explanation purposes, let’s also try an attempt at reading said glyph with the rules I’ve set up and see if anything reasonable pops up (and keep your look-up diagrams with you. Can’t believe I made actual look-up diagrams).
Surprisingly, though maybe it’s just me spotting patterns in nothing, this isn’t complete gibberish, and I’d interpret this spell as being something that connects memories that are in danger of being absorbed by someone else to light balls, but also using it to order them and move them around, as long as the subject is aware of it happening. Sounds a bit like a mindscape defence against mind-reading. So yeah, that’s the basics out of the way.
Let’s see how this works out with the basic glyph combos in the show.
Invisibility glyph: Lightened (centre, adjective) coloured (top-left, adjective) transparency (bottom-right, noun) order (bottom-left, noun) → Subject becomes lightened by coloured transparency through order → Invisibility through camouflage. Side-note, the bottom-left glyph can be absent and the glyph still works, as seen in its first instance. But I think the ‘order’ allows for multiple to be camouflaged by the one glyph.
Safety hover glyph: Light (centre, noun) stillness (top-right, noun) movement (bottom-left, noun) → Use light on movement to make stillness → Stop subject’s movement instantly.
Snow/Command glyph (copyright, Lilith): Null (centre, not drawn, surrounding circle isn’t a merger circuit (repeats of Ice) so isn’t acting as central glyph, meaning the empty space is an implied Null glyph) power (top, adjective) weakness (bottom, noun) preserved (left, adjective) removed (right, adjective) → The external object touching the centre is removed, this process is powered through weakness, yet the object is preserved → Break down this object through sheer power but keep the debris (In the case of the ice blob, break it down and powder it into snow)
So that turned out pretty well (Though I did already say I ordered the diagram with secondary glyph meanings to at least make sense of the basic glyphs).
Let’s go one final step further and see what we can use from what Philip eventually used in his glyphs.
Shortcuts and Miscellaneous Stuff
Let’s add one more concept to this entire system before that though.h) Condense and simplify glyphs as much as possible.
Obviously, for usability it’s always best to find a way to get the same spell/effect with a glyph that’s easier to draw. And since this system is like a language, it’s like saying there are multiple ways of saying the same thing, with some faster to say than others.
But more than that, it’s also like shortening actual sentences with contractions, abbreviations, and finding that one specific obscure word in the Thesaurus that you previously had to use several words for to describe. For example, if you have multiple non-concentric circuits you could attempt orientating them to have multiple instances of the same glyphs overlap and work from there.
Another thing that was mentioned a while back was how glyphs on intersections only apply to the smaller circuit, unless specified. Well, let’s say this can be specified by drawing a straight line from the intersection glyph to the central glyph of the bigger circle, indicating it contributes simultaneously to both circles with two separate meanings.
This way of using straight lines to show a glyph is pulling double- or triple-duty can also be applied to drawing a line between two glyphs on the same circuit. This would make use of the previously discarded concept for how glyph meanings are ‘diff 4 placement’, indicating that the connected glyphs also have additional meanings based on their relative placement to one another.
For example, let’s take Philip’s petrification glyph.
Petrification glyph: Iced (centre, adjective) removed (right, adjective) [Change (relative bottom-left, noun)] preserved (left, adjective) organism (bottom, noun) [Stilled (relative top-right, adjective) inorganic (relative top, adjective)] → Organism is removed but preserved, by having changed the stilled organism into something inorganic.
That already works amazingly on its own, though there’s also this funky plant glyph that’s unconnected to a circle but still connected to other glyphs by straight lines.
Something that hasn’t been tackled yet is how to actually use the primary meaning of the basic glyphs outside of being the central focus, because there’s no other place in the current rules for the basic glyphs to apply their elemental meaning on anything. So let’s make it so that a basic glyph that’s disconnected from a circle still has primary meaning, and is applied to other glyphs with straight lines. In this case that would add that iced life is preserved.
…This obviously doesn’t work too well since in canon the petrification is permanent and kills the petrified person, but I’ll gladly hop onto the convenient lifeboat that is the context of this glyph being incomplete. I’d say Philip was originally experimenting with a way of turning someone into stone as a defensive spell, but a) didn’t know how to express stone yet, and b) didn’t want it to be permanent, since that would be pretty iffy unless he already has all the power over the Boiling Isles and nobody attempting to question him for killing people. So this original glyph just turned the subject ‘inorganic’, which is apparently just some weak dust, so the preserving of life to make it reversible is pretty useless here anyway. Clearly not complete yet. In the completed, proper petrification glyph, the small Plant glyph with the two connections would be gone to make it irreversible, and a merger circle of Fire and Plant (Earth) with the two glyphs intersecting with another, appropriately sized merger circle with Ice as the third glyph (Hard), bringing a total circuit for (Hard Earth = Stone).
Either way, let’s add elemental modification to the toolkit.
Let’s go to the other three of Philip’s WIP glyphs and try to make sense of them, plus whatever extra features were added. First up, water fountain.
Water fountain glyph: Sever (centre (top-left), verb (there’s no real noun for ‘sever’, and no double border so all that’s left is verb)) tangible (top-left, adjective) still (top-right, adjective) transparent (bottom-right, adjective). We also have some funky spiral lines connecting the three to the central point. My current translation would be ‘sever something here that’s tangible, still, and transparent’. My guess is that my boi Phil was trying to make a glyph that could isolate groundwater and get it out of the ground, probably for survival purposes since groundwater would be drinkable compared to the Boiling Sea and Rain (Luz assumes the glyph is meant to make a water fountain, but that’s just what she sees the glyph doing, not what its intended use is). Obviously he didn’t know how to properly express ‘groundwater’ at this point, or thought it was too bulky to write down that way, and went with a vague description of ‘tangible but transparent and still (not moving in the ground)’ instead. I think the spiralling lines here are supposed to provide a direction for the motion (there’s no motion glyph in here, i.e. Fire bottom-left, but severing water from the ground would probably push it up and give it some motion regardless, so the lines help direct it). It would make sense, since just bringing water straight up would make it fall back down on the ground, so you need a little trajectory to have it land in a gathering bowl next to the glyph. That said, let’s add motion lines.
Next up, monster arm.
The new feature here is a partial circle segment capped off by two fire glyphs. The first thing that comes to mind for me is that this is supposed to be an abbreviation for when you have to draw the same glyph on neighbouring locations of the circuit. So instead you only draw the correct glyph at the ends of the sequence and let the line imply the rest of the meanings involved. In this case: Evolution/Change (centre (bottom-left), noun) Protect Decay Weak Motion Hurt Sever Deception (right-to-top (clockwise), nouns), and on a second circuit ring, Evolution (bottom-left, noun). My current thoughts are that the ground or whatever sits at the central circle undergoes a change into something that can protect, move, hurt, sever, and deceive. And whatever that thing becomes is then told to continue evolving/changing/adapting.
What I think makes this glyph a failed WIP is that, though the segment already excludes Chaos (top-right), which would be pretty detrimental for a construct you want to order around, it does still include Weak and Decay (bottom and bottom-right), which makes the monster arm physically weak, prone to damage and slowly breaking down over time, as demonstrated in the episode. But Philips didn’t want to let go of using the segment to draw only two Fire glyphs instead of five either, as further breaking up the segment would isolate the Fire glyph on the right, which would separate the glyph from the system and turn it into a separate one that happens to occupy the same space, and a full circuit would require drawing five glyphs too). I think a good solution that Philip probably used in the completed version would be to use the Null glyph to further exclude the meanings that aren’t desired while keeping the full line segment intact.
Definitely useful to simplify the drawing process, so let’s add sequence segments as well.
Last of the WIP glyphs: the tornado glyph, which is the only one that actually works decently, on a small scale anyway, and saved for last for good reason.
We now have some sort of combination of circle segments positioned in layers, and direct line connections with both disconnected and connected element glyphs, as well as straight radial lines coming from the central glyph.
Since these Fire glyphs are on actual circular segments, let’s begin simply with the normal secondary meanings.
Tornado glyph: Icy (centre, adjective) Emitted (bottom-left, adjective) Sever (top-left, verb) Protection (right, noun) Weakness (bottom, noun).
Alright, so it took a while, but if I really want to make sense of this I’ll have to budge some parts of the word type indicators in the right direction. In this case, the bottom glyph will be changed to the adjective version, and the right glyph turned into its verb version.
To start with, as a circle segment, the line trajectory is only associated with Fire, and with the radial line segments in the bottom-left and bottom-right we’ll add those meanings as well. And the connection to the bottom-left Light glyph means something as well. So we now have Emitted (Light, bottom-left) Movement (Fire, bottom-left) Weak (Fire, bottom) Decays (Fire, bottom-right), so ‘an emitted movement that’s weak and decays’. It’s also connected to the circle segment one layer deeper, which has Protect (Fire, right) Decay (Fire, bottom-right). So we have ‘an emitted movement that’s weak and decays, but is protected from decay’. Since the line segment connects the outer circuit line (with the Light glyph) to the central glyph, and the outer glyphs apply to the inner ones, we also add some directionality. So now it becomes ‘an emitted, weak movement that decays as it moves inwards, but is protected from slowing down in total’. That’s probably just me budging everything, but that sounds like how the movement within a vortex of air behaves.
Lastly, the top circle segment has Sever (Fire, top-left) and Chaos (Fire, top-right), and has no connection between the outside circuit and the central glyph. So I’d say ‘sever chaos’ i.e. counteract the chaotic movement of the already existing air, and thus making it organised when it begins moving. Altogether, this glyph describes an ‘emitted, uniform motion that decays as it goes inwards but remains stable overall’. It might’ve been a bit wonky to get here, but none of the rules I’ve made have been contradicted yet and it actually got a decently accurate reading out of it.
Conclusion (plus an attempt to make a glyph from scratch for an existing spell)
So yeah, that’s literally all there is, and I think I got a cohesive system together that fits all the concepts I listed at the start, even if it’s certainly got a lot of cogs, but that’s to be expected when your system is described as a language.Technically I could also cover Philip’s Teleportation glyph or the unlocking glyph Belos used to enter the Grimwalker area in the Skull, but that’s a) too much effort and probably doesn’t match up with my meanings for the former, but it can be left up as an exercise to the reader. And b) the additional rules the latter glyph could imply would probably be far too complex and unnecessary for this post (which is at the character limit), or for making glyphs altogether. We gotta keep in mind that that glyph is from someone who’s been experimenting and drawing for 400 years, so the previous simplifications/tricks I covered in the last section would be far more amplified and complex.
Either way, with that all finished up, let’s use it to build a glyph from scratch that mimics a complex spell we see used in canon but doesn’t have a glyph counterpart.
For this, I’ll use the ‘quick-step’ spell we see Eda and Lilith use, where they turn into flame and quickly move elsewhere, reappearing at the end. Hunter does something similar with Flapjack, but there it’s done with light.
So, the central component of this entire spell will be moving. And the descriptor circuit for that movement will be something like ‘[move] a person quickly along a path’. ‘Quickly’ here can be made with a merger circuit. Then, if I want to recreate the spell accurately, the path needs to be specified to be somewhat short, so you can’t just use it to teleport somewhere far away. This can easily be done by specifying that it has to be visible for the caster before they cast it, using a specification circuit.
The next component will be the turning the person into fire. This sounds like a spell on its own, even if it’s pretty deadly, so it’ll be a nested spell that links to the main circuit through a subcircuit. The subcircuit will then be something like ‘change person into fire’. Since this spell is still very much deadly on its own, it’ll also need its own specifier saying that the person should be preserved during the change, for protection.
Lastly, it still needs a way to reverse this change from fire back to person once the spell has reached the end of the connection. In this case, ‘Reverse’ and ‘Ending’ can both be made from merger circuits.
Now we just need to add all those circuits together, making sure each type of circle has the right border glyphs and glyph positioning (tangent or intersecting, on-grid or off-grid), and lastly the condition of ‘reverse transformation spell at end of trajectory’ needs to be properly linked up. And with that we get the final Quick-Step glyph here.
Some additional notes. The top circuit didn’t technically have to go at the top-right, but it did need to intersect with the main circuit through one of its glyphs. The only other place where it wouldn’t have overlapped with the main circuit’s glyphs would’ve been in the top-left, with the merger circuit for ‘Fast/Quick’ needing to rotate down on the main circuit a bit to accommodate. But in that case the series of connected circuits for the ‘reverse at end of trajectory’ would’ve been impossible to draw compactly. Either they’d go straight over the main circuit, or going around the circuit would require giant circles.
And then there’s also the inside line segments of the subcircuit. I haven’t established the rules for how those would work, and I’m playing it a bit loose there, but basically the places where the circles jump down in layer (shorter radius) is where the glyphs on the outside ring slot in. If the segment had jumped down a layer where a glyph from the outside hadn’t been connected into it, then it would’ve been the corresponding definition for the Fire glyph at the start of the circuit. The reading order here is also from the Fire glyph towards the centre. And lastly, the outside circuit of the spell ‘organism change inorganic’ does need disambiguation, since it could also be read as ‘inorganic change organism’. The direction of how the inside circuit approaches the middle helps disambiguate that, giving it a defined reading order, which is then read in reverse once the ‘Reverse’ circuit comes into play.
And…wow, I think that’s all. I’ve spent an entire day typing this out (plus way too many days of experimenting with things and coming up with some rules), and few people will probably see this, but damn that was satisfying to write out.
For those of you who read all the way to the end, or God forbid actually took the time to take it all in, thank you very much!
…I’m going to bed.
2023.05.05 14:55 JackPembroke [SF] Jank - A gamelit short story
Hey folks, first time posting a story here. I've already got a compendium of short stories written on Royal Road, so I figure I'll share some of the individual ones here. Feedback welcome! For those that don't know, gamelit is a niche genre of story that takes place entirely in, or surrounding, a video game.
Optimus Live VR headset recognized.
Origin Online successfully installed.
Update available. Game must restart.
I grimaced. The Day One patch was just a Band-Aid to hold this game together through launch. They had released a glitchy mess, and I was going to make them pay.
Back when we started, I had believed in Origin Online. It was going to be beautiful, the most ambitious and technologically advanced free-to-play fantasy MMORPG the world had ever seen. But now, as its flashy intro soared across the pristine landscape, I had to close my eyes. It was like being unable to enjoy a favorite food after it’s made you sick.
I’d sat through this intro hundreds of times during testing, probably thousands. They had refused to shorten the unskippable intro sequence, and still it went on. I rapid-clicked, as if by some miracle I’d be allowed to skip it.
Title screen > New character > Human > Default stats > Default avatar > Default equipment package #1 > Yes I’m sure > Skip tutorial > Start game. Muscle memory allowed me to race through the setup process, clicking where the buttons would appear like precognition .
My new boring character spawned into Origin Online’s starting town, if it could even be called that. I was already an expert, with thousands of hours logged in every square inch of this buggy hell hole. All that time exchanged for silence, platitudes , and a crappy paycheck.
The starting town was packed with the identical avatars of thousands of other players who rushed through the setup to get their first glimpse of this incredible new online experience. To its credit, OO’s quantum server never skipped a beat. It really was a marvel of technology. Every player on Earth would exist in a single open world, bigger and more spectacular than anything that came before. Except the starting hovel, of course. Who cares about first impressions, right?
OO was so hyped that they talked about its progress on the evening news. Distinguished, white-haired men would drone on about world tragedies, scandals, and disasters, then smile as they came to the latest promise that Claud Vanderstint had made about Origin Online.
Claud Vanderstint. Even thinking the name made me grit my teeth.
I had 48 hours to reach Level 100, and I had to do it before anyone else. The players around me were gawking at the beautiful VR textures, testing the game physics, or rushing toward the first NPC with a quest indicator. I began jumping, backwards, into the surrounding jungle.
They had fixed the infinite acceleration glitch, but only by giving a top maximum speed. The solution was rushed and worse, not very effective. Lush foliage flew past me, tiny fantasy animals scattering in my wake. I knew the route so well I didn’t even need to turn my head.
I arrived at the fungus field and snatched up red and blue capped mushrooms as fast as I could. My macro combined them as soon as they appeared in my inventory. At early levels, spamming craftables was the fastest way to gain XP. My level indicator dinged again and again. I checked the option to auto-level, automatically distributing points to the default warrior stats.
“Choose a power!” said the game. Players earned a feat upon reaching Level 5. I opened the menu and picked Iron Fist from the hundreds of abilities available. Now my bare fists counted as low quality tools.
I beelined for a towering oak tree and rapid-clicked to attack it as fast as possible. My upgraded fists made taking down the tree possible, but not efficient. It took twelve minutes of continuous clicking to down it. I shook out my mouse hand as the massive trunk splintered and cracked, its invisible HP gauge reduced to zero. The crash would be investigated by new players certainly. They could help themselves to the Uncommon Wood, I would be back later.
I needed a weapon, and I knew just the one.
Reverse jumping toward the Doom Ridge Mountain, I passed dozens of other players. They were having fun, exploring this brave new world and sampling all it had to offer. They were like a thousand digital Adams and Eves. I pitied them. They hadn’t sampled the Tree of Knowledge yet. They were happy because they were innocent. I would be their serpent.
It took 45 minutes of reverse jumping to reach Doom Ridge Mountain. The scope of the game was exhilarating, until you realized what an ordeal changing locations became. Then you’d look for ways to skip it and just get where you were going. You’d be led to a quest line that unlocked the option to pay actual money for a fast travel scroll.
Con man. You’re just a typical con man, Claud. Con Man Claud, good alliteration. I’d have to remember that for when I reached the end.
Doom Ridge Mountain contained a high-level dungeon. One of my favorites, actually. The blinding smoke, lava bombs, and rivers of molten rock made the environment as dangerous as the salamander tribe enemies. Even cooler was that attempting the dungeon triggered a volcanic eruption that would rain destruction on anyone near the mountain.
I hated what they did to this game. This was such a cool dungeon! There were others too, inspired challenges for dedicated players. Relics left by the developers who poured their souls into OO, before they were replaced by cheap labor to rush the game out.
I bunny hopped my way up the mountain to the dungeon’s exit. A large boulder blocked the tunnel, and I wedged myself against the seam. I went into settings and cranked my control sensitivity. I began spinning while I jumped against the boulder and the wall, and my stomach lurched at the whirlwind of movement. My avatar began to twist in midair and jittered between the pieces of geometry.
I squinted to minimize nausea. Come on, you bastard.
“Where the hell is the player?!” the character location tracker fumed.
“Well, mostly they’re over here, but sometimes they’re also a little over there,” said the geometry.
“Nonsense! They can’t be in two places at once! Pick one and put them there!”
“Yes!” I was beginning to fear the boulder clip issue had been fixed. I ran down the tunnel to the dungeon treasure vault. The Salamander King who guarded the vault was safely on the wrong side of the door. I pulled aggro on him, but he had no way to reach me. I could hear his distinctive tongue attack. He pulled you into his mouth and crushed you for trillions of damage. Unavoidable, unfair and, in this game, basically criminal.
I skipped the mountains of gold and gems, grabbed the Salamander Plate Armor, two Rings of Life Fortification, and a Helm of Endurance. All were useful, but the real prize was resting on the altar—the Axe of Earth’s Fire. “An artifact of incredible power, said to require a wielder to prove their worth in order to hold it,” according to the item description.
This ‘test’ was to burn whoever picked it up for an obscene amount of damage. If you survived you were worthy, if not bring on the next contender. I used to think it was a neat effect, but in retrospect it was just another trap.
I threw an empty chest at the altar. The chest burst into flames and I looted the axe in the recharge window before the test was active again. A bug meant the axe considered just about anything to be a valid target.
I was the one to first discover this glitch. It was early on, when we thought our bug reports mattered. My fellow testers and I had managed to get a generic NPC to survive the test and pick up the axe, becoming its true owner and keeping it out of reach of players forever. It had seemed so funny at the time.
Now the Axe of Earth’s Fire was mine. Other players would be picking up their first iron weapons by now, ooing and aahing over +1 gear. I was now the single most powerful player in the game. It would take six months of grinding for someone to match me.
I’m not done yet, you son of a bitch.
The stone moved out of my way with no trouble. After all I was exiting the vault, so I must have completed the dungeon!
Next step, waterfall. Easy to find, as a dramatic natural feature they were everywhere. I reverse jumped to one nearby. Crystal clear water fell from a high cliff, creating a rainbow that made an idyllic place to sit and appreciate the beautiful textures. Lipstick on a pig.
There was a chance (a small one, but still) that they’d fixed the bug so my setup no longer worked. I hopped onto the rocks, beneath the waterfall. The rock I wanted was third from the left, every waterfall built exactly the same. I stood on the very edge of it and backed up, pixel by pixel. I fell off. My position had to be perfect.
I took a deep cleansing breath. I kept trying.
After a few more attempts, I managed it. I stood on thin air, my feet just beyond the edge of the rock. The new players would soon discover the shabby geometry. Maybe some already had, falling through the level or suffocating inside trees. But for me, it was time again to practice patience.
I started a macro that made me jump, then attempt to swim, over and over.
“Attempting swim up a waterfall?!” The game’s swim mechanic was aghast. “You have nary the skill level to do such a thing!”
“Now, now. They can do it,” said the XP tracker, “just for a teeny tiny moment.”
The swim mechanic harrumphed. “They can swim for that instant and not a second longer!
“Don’t forget the multipliers for swimming with all that armor.”
“They can try all day, they’re never getting up that waterfall. Mua-hahahahaha!”
I took off the VR headset and wiped the sweat from my face. The macro would take about an hour to get me to Swim 100. Good time for a break. I had to keep an eye on my screen, though. At any moment a mod might notice me, someone might get a notification something was wrong, and my plan would be ruined.
My dinner was a jumbo burrito and milkshake. I needed my strength for the next part.
My avatar had maxed out swim. Each jump now carried me several feet up the waterfall before the Salamander Plate pulled me back onto the questionable geometry.
I was now Level 10. For my new feat, I chose Fresh Meat. Monsters would now be more likely to notice and attack me. There was only one monster I was interested in.
I reverse jumped back to the nearest wood where my prey would be lurking. I had to be careful not to let anyone get a good look at my equipment. The wrong questions could lead to me getting banned, but I needed the gear for the next part.
I crouched to sneak as the terrain turned to sucking mud. Trees were sparse and giant insects flitted about so fast they seemed to be teleporting. Fresh Meat pulled aggro on them, but my ludicrously overpowered equipment made the fights no more than a click per bug.
As I walked through the muck, I heard a grunting sound. A large, lumpy beast shook off the brown goop and grumbled at me.
There you are little pig. Come and get me now.
The bristle-backed mud hog charged out of its soupy nest, squealing and slashing with its tusks. I dodged attack and waited for it to attack again.
The hog launched into an attack sequence of bites, gores, and headbutts. I blocked the attacks to reduce the damage. Then it exposed its flank to me, telegraphing the attack I was waiting for. The hog spun in a blur, a melee area of effect attack. Intended to be used when the hog was surrounded, but still part of its normal line up of moves.
I jumped over the hog as it spun, aiming for its exact axis of rotation, and swung the Axe of Earth’s Flame down on it. The pig died in a single blow, dropping a paltry amount of coin.
Dammit. The spinning pig glitch was difficult to pull off. The attack needed to be frame perfect, I needed to be in the perfect position, and it had to be during that one specific move. But it was worth it.
There was a strange bug when a mud hog died in just the right way, at just the right time. The fight ended, but the hog’s attack was still considered in progress against its last target. It became an artifact, still spinning, but with no stats. The result was a collision object rotating at incredible speeds and doing damage per frame of collision detection. With a frame rate powered by quantum computing, it resulted in nearly infinite damage per second of contact.
Traipsing through the mud, I swatted man-eating bugs from the sky and leapt over pig after pig. I gained enough levels to upgrade Fresh Meat to Seasoned, spawning more enemies in my zone. This was a work of endurance, jumping and striking over and over as time ticked away.
I had a dreadful thought. What if the Day One patch fixed the spinning pig glitch!? Ooooh, what a bitter irony that would be. I had fought with them to fix the spinning pigs for months.
“Got it! Yes!” I leapt from my chair in victory. I was now the proud owner of a spinning pig. It hovered, perpetually just to my right, ready to kill anything that could be killed.
I made my way back to the massive oak I had felled near the starting area. The spinning pig tore down trees and disintegrated foliage as I travelled. I managed to avoid any other players, though I was sure they’d investigate the swath of destruction I left in my wake. With a little maneuvering, I managed to drill the pig into the side of a massive boulder, carving twisted paths to conceal myself. It wasn’t perfect, but it would have to do while I went AFK.
Alright, time to get some rest. Then we kill God.
I didn’t sleep well. I was too anxious about logging in to find my character deleted with a ban notice, or discovering they’d managed to squeeze in an emergency patch.
You’ll be done soon, I told myself. It will be worth the lawsuits, the burning bridges, all of it.
My character was still in my makeshift pig cave, apparently undisturbed. I breathed a sigh of relief, then started on the next stage of my plan.
I returned to the stump of the great oak I’d punched to death yesterday. Trees had a 24 hour respawn cycle, and it was nearly time.
I stood on the stump and waited. It was meditative, listening to the birds and animals that populated the jungle. There was time to appreciate what the game had aspired to be. Blood, sweat, and tears poured into an amazing world. I felt a pang, knowing what I was about to do.
But amongst all that verdant foliage, all those spine covered monkeys, poisonous lizards, and collectible butterflies, there was still the spinning pig beside me. For all the love that went into this OO, it was sloth, greed, and arrogance that allowed this hog of unlimited destruction.
24 hours ticked by, and the geometry collision detection threw a fit.
“Two objects occupying the same space at the same time?! Absurd! I won’t hear of it!”
“What shall we do?” asked the physics engine.
“Send the player away as quick as possible!”
The physics engine gave a servile bow.
A great tree erupted beneath my feet and rocketed me directly upward. The game world shrank away as the clouds of the skybox rushed to meet me. I passed through them and entered the realm of the game’s final dungeon, The Palace of the Sky King.
Instead of falling back to earth, I began to swim. The mechanics for flying hadn’t been built yet, so for now the whole place was considered underwater. Multiple end-game content quests barricaded the doors of the Palace, great beasts and dragons holding keys that would unlock the doors. But, as I had not yet initiated those quests, the entire area was inert.
I passed through the gates like a ghost. A nasally voice crackled in my ear. “Sky King intro dialogue here.”
“Dammit, Claud, finish your game !” I yelled to no one.
The palace was an empty shell. The walls and floors had placeholder textures. But I had to forgive them, at least a little. This part of OO wasn’t meant to be encountered for at least a year. The quests’ difficulty was so great, the devs expected it to take tens of thousands of Level 100 players to storm the Palace together.
No one was supposed to be here for a long time.
I floated through the palace, clipping through walls, and into the Sky King’s throne room. There, the Sky King sat upon his throne of storms. Composed of light, hurricanes, and raw power, he held in one hand the golden Staff of Winds, the four winds of the earth churning like tornadoes on the top. His other hand held the Sword of Storms, the weapon with which he would smite the world. The weapon I had come for.
He was awe-inspiring, the love child of two genius devs who were subsequently fired for “performance-related insubordination”. I was no bigger than a flea to this titan.
I spoke a sort of prayer at his feet. “You deserved better than this, you big, beautiful bastard.”
The Sky King was unmoved. I turned, aligning the spinning pig to The Sky King’s foot. A credit to his immense difficulty, he took almost three seconds to die. He never moved, not even a death animation. His status simply changed from living to lootable. My XP counter didn’t even twitch.
“Who shall receive The Sky King’s XP?!” the game wondered.
“No one! He died of collision! He must have fallen! He’s awfully tall you know, long way to fall.”
“What of his treasure vault? Shall it be opened?”
“Of course! He dead, isn’t he?”
A hurricane’s eye appeared behind the throne. It led to the vaults where the most valuable treasures and God-tier equipment would appear. I wasn’t interested.
I looted The Sword of Storms from the Sky King’s body and clipped through the floor. Outside the Palace, I swam downward until I reached the normal skybox and began to plummet.
Splat. Dead. The pig spun victoriously.
The screen went dark and two options appeared: New Character or Continue, in a large green button. I seethed. Here was the core of the matter.
I hit Continue, and a new box appeared. “You have chosen continue your adventure! $3.87 has been charged to your account.”
They marketed their “Pay to live” system as a way to ensure high-level characters would cycle out over time. But that was where the lies began.
Better enjoy it that $3.87 while it’s still yours, Claud.
I was revived . Almost there. I unequipped the Sword of Storms and stored it in my inventory, then began scooping up handfuls of the nearest Common item. In this area, that was acorns. Soon I had seven stacks of 55 acorns.
For whatever reason, OO really hated the number 55. The odds of glitches increased dramatically if there were 55 of anything, and I knew how to how to trigger a bug 100% of the time. It was on this bug that my whole plan rested.
I arranged my inventory so the Sword of Storms was between the fifth and sixth stacks of acorns, then took off my headset and yanked the plug on my computer. The screen flashed white and turned off. I counted to five (superstition dies hard) and plugged it back in.
While my computer rebooted, and I started gathering on all the light sources in my room and turned them towards my face. I reviewed my script one last time. I logged in. That wretched intro played again. Click-click-click-click-click-click. Clickclickclickclickclickclick.
The Sword of Storms was a unique item, one of the strongest in the game. It had a power that could be used once every 30 days, Wrath of the Sky King. The weather in Origin Online could be anywhere from a pleasant day to a hurricane. Casting Wrath of the Sky King increased the weather’s severity by two steps. Sunny, Cloudy, Windy, Raining, Storm, Heavy Thunderstorm, Tornado, Hurricane, Storm of Judgment.
Normally, a player could only summon a Storm of Judgement if they used Wrath of the Sky King when there was already a tornado. But, nestled in my inventory between my stacks of 55 acorns, I had a neat little stack of 55 Swords of Storms.
Equip Sword of Storms, hotkey Wrath of the Sky King, cast. I swung the sword in a great arc over my head and the sky began to darken. The wind shook the trees. Wrath of the Sky King affected the entire server at once, except for the wielder of the Sword. But I had to hurry. The mods and devs would realize something was wrong very soon.
Equip, hotkey, cast. I discarded the legendary artifact after using it. Poof, gone forever. Now rain poured from the sky in blinding sheets and trees bowed their heads to my power.
Equip, hotkey, cast. The clouds began to twist and pucker overhead. Hail fell from the skies. In the distance I saw funnel clouds form and reach their questing fingers for buildings and characters to destroy.
Equip, hotkey, cast. Game over, ladies and gentlemen. I smoothed down my hair as arcs of purple and yellow lightning crawled through the clouds. The ground erupted where they struck. Balls of burning ice hurtled down, the rain turned to caustic acid, and the tornados became mile wide monstrosities that hunted their targets.
Equip, hotkey, cast.
Equip, hotkey, cast.
Equip, hotkey, cast.
“I say!” said the weather programming, “We’ve already reached the maximum possible weather severity. Whatever shall we do now?”
“We follow the rules!” the game’s logic engine replied. “If the spell is used in the presence of a tornado or higher, it causes a Storm of Judgement! I see tornados, don’t you?”
“Well, of course! But where shall we put the new Storm of Judgement? There’s already one right here!”
“Oh. I suppose there is. Ah well, just throw it on top of the old one!”
“Very good! And the others?”
“Add them to the pile! And don’t forget to award XP to the caster for anything the storm kills!
I watched in awe as the lightning became so dense it hid the clouds. Tornados merged together, as wide as continents. Acid rain fell like with the intensity of a waterfall. Burning hail ravaged the earth in great columns.
Everything everywhere died.
In less than 30 seconds, I had become the only living thing in Origins Online. My XP bar filled again and again, and small window appeared.
“Congratulations! You’re the first player to reach the Level 100! As a reward, we’re offering you the chance to livestream your reaction to every player, all over the world! You’ll have 5 minutes. Please no swearing or your other rewards will be null and void. Click the OK button to begin the stream.”
I yanked off my VR headset just in time for my face to appear on the screen, captured by my computer’s built in camera. I smiled at the millions who were watching me right now. Showtime!
“Hello, everyone. My name is Rebecca Vanderstint, and I’m the daughter of Origins Online lead creator, Claud Vanderstint. I orchestrated this event to tell you that my father is a liar and a cheat.
“I was the principle tester for Origins Online, and I learned things Con Man Claud doesn’t want you to know. For example, everyone knows that resurrecting a character costs money. But are you aware there are invisible stat changes every time you resurrect? That they make you more likely to find rare items, but also make you susceptible to crits and sudden death? Your character becomes more valuable to compel you to pay the ever-increasing fees. And believe me, those fees ramp up fast. OO is the world’s most overhyped pay-to-win. Its designed to be unfair, to rob you, and to take advantage of you for playing it.”
I paused to let that information sink in and remind myself not to talk too fast. There’s your game Claud, now for your reputation.
“Claud Vanderstint is also guilty of sexual harassment and assault on multiple women on his design team. He has withheld promised overtime pay to employees and fired them when they try to get their money. Their royalties end up in his pocket. And he knows his team of lawyers can drag out a case and bankrupt anyone who tries to bring them to court.”
Now for your freedom.
“Claud Vanderstint is also involved in tax evasion and fraud. His entire board of directors is in on it. They don’t intend to pay a dime on their profits from OO. Anyone who digs into his finances will find evidence. I swear to testify before any court on any of these claims. Furthermore—"
The window closed. Time’s up. I finally settled back into my chair, the muscles in my back sighing in relief. I heard the door to my room open, and I spun around to greet him.
“Good game, Dad.”
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Optimus Live VR headset recognized.
Origin Online successfully installed.
Update available. Game must restart.
I grimaced. The Day One patch was just a Band-Aid to hold this game together through launch. They had released a glitchy mess, and I was going to make them pay.
Back when we started, I had believed in Origin Online. It was going to be beautiful, the most ambitious and technologically advanced free-to-play fantasy MMORPG the world had ever seen. But now, as its flashy intro soared across the pristine landscape, I had to close my eyes. It was like being unable to enjoy a favorite food after it’s made you sick.
I’d sat through this intro hundreds of times during testing, probably thousands. They had refused to shorten the unskippable intro sequence, and still it went on. I rapid-clicked, as if by some miracle I’d be allowed to skip it.
Title screen > New character > Human > Default stats > Default avatar > Default equipment package #1 > Yes I’m sure > Skip tutorial > Start game. Muscle memory allowed me to race through the setup process, clicking where the buttons would appear like precognition .
My new boring character spawned into Origin Online’s starting town, if it could even be called that. I was already an expert, with thousands of hours logged in every square inch of this buggy hell hole. All that time exchanged for silence, platitudes , and a crappy paycheck.
The starting town was packed with the identical avatars of thousands of other players who rushed through the setup to get their first glimpse of this incredible new online experience. To its credit, OO’s quantum server never skipped a beat. It really was a marvel of technology. Every player on Earth would exist in a single open world, bigger and more spectacular than anything that came before. Except the starting hovel, of course. Who cares about first impressions, right?
OO was so hyped that they talked about its progress on the evening news. Distinguished, white-haired men would drone on about world tragedies, scandals, and disasters, then smile as they came to the latest promise that Claud Vanderstint had made about Origin Online.
Claud Vanderstint. Even thinking the name made me grit my teeth.
I had 48 hours to reach Level 100, and I had to do it before anyone else. The players around me were gawking at the beautiful VR textures, testing the game physics, or rushing toward the first NPC with a quest indicator. I began jumping, backwards, into the surrounding jungle.
They had fixed the infinite acceleration glitch, but only by giving a top maximum speed. The solution was rushed and worse, not very effective. Lush foliage flew past me, tiny fantasy animals scattering in my wake. I knew the route so well I didn’t even need to turn my head.
I arrived at the fungus field and snatched up red and blue capped mushrooms as fast as I could. My macro combined them as soon as they appeared in my inventory. At early levels, spamming craftables was the fastest way to gain XP. My level indicator dinged again and again. I checked the option to auto-level, automatically distributing points to the default warrior stats.
“Choose a power!” said the game. Players earned a feat upon reaching Level 5. I opened the menu and picked Iron Fist from the hundreds of abilities available. Now my bare fists counted as low quality tools.
I beelined for a towering oak tree and rapid-clicked to attack it as fast as possible. My upgraded fists made taking down the tree possible, but not efficient. It took twelve minutes of continuous clicking to down it. I shook out my mouse hand as the massive trunk splintered and cracked, its invisible HP gauge reduced to zero. The crash would be investigated by new players certainly. They could help themselves to the Uncommon Wood, I would be back later.
I needed a weapon, and I knew just the one.
Reverse jumping toward the Doom Ridge Mountain, I passed dozens of other players. They were having fun, exploring this brave new world and sampling all it had to offer. They were like a thousand digital Adams and Eves. I pitied them. They hadn’t sampled the Tree of Knowledge yet. They were happy because they were innocent. I would be their serpent.
It took 45 minutes of reverse jumping to reach Doom Ridge Mountain. The scope of the game was exhilarating, until you realized what an ordeal changing locations became. Then you’d look for ways to skip it and just get where you were going. You’d be led to a quest line that unlocked the option to pay actual money for a fast travel scroll.
Con man. You’re just a typical con man, Claud. Con Man Claud, good alliteration. I’d have to remember that for when I reached the end.
Doom Ridge Mountain contained a high-level dungeon. One of my favorites, actually. The blinding smoke, lava bombs, and rivers of molten rock made the environment as dangerous as the salamander tribe enemies. Even cooler was that attempting the dungeon triggered a volcanic eruption that would rain destruction on anyone near the mountain.
I hated what they did to this game. This was such a cool dungeon! There were others too, inspired challenges for dedicated players. Relics left by the developers who poured their souls into OO, before they were replaced by cheap labor to rush the game out.
I bunny hopped my way up the mountain to the dungeon’s exit. A large boulder blocked the tunnel, and I wedged myself against the seam. I went into settings and cranked my control sensitivity. I began spinning while I jumped against the boulder and the wall, and my stomach lurched at the whirlwind of movement. My avatar began to twist in midair and jittered between the pieces of geometry.
I squinted to minimize nausea. Come on, you bastard.
“Where the hell is the player?!” the character location tracker fumed.
“Well, mostly they’re over here, but sometimes they’re also a little over there,” said the geometry.
“Nonsense! They can’t be in two places at once! Pick one and put them there!”
“Yes!” I was beginning to fear the boulder clip issue had been fixed. I ran down the tunnel to the dungeon treasure vault. The Salamander King who guarded the vault was safely on the wrong side of the door. I pulled aggro on him, but he had no way to reach me. I could hear his distinctive tongue attack. He pulled you into his mouth and crushed you for trillions of damage. Unavoidable, unfair and, in this game, basically criminal.
I skipped the mountains of gold and gems, grabbed the Salamander Plate Armor, two Rings of Life Fortification, and a Helm of Endurance. All were useful, but the real prize was resting on the altar—the Axe of Earth’s Fire. “An artifact of incredible power, said to require a wielder to prove their worth in order to hold it,” according to the item description.
This ‘test’ was to burn whoever picked it up for an obscene amount of damage. If you survived you were worthy, if not bring on the next contender. I used to think it was a neat effect, but in retrospect it was just another trap.
I threw an empty chest at the altar. The chest burst into flames and I looted the axe in the recharge window before the test was active again. A bug meant the axe considered just about anything to be a valid target.
I was the one to first discover this glitch. It was early on, when we thought our bug reports mattered. My fellow testers and I had managed to get a generic NPC to survive the test and pick up the axe, becoming its true owner and keeping it out of reach of players forever. It had seemed so funny at the time.
Now the Axe of Earth’s Fire was mine. Other players would be picking up their first iron weapons by now, ooing and aahing over +1 gear. I was now the single most powerful player in the game. It would take six months of grinding for someone to match me.
I’m not done yet, you son of a bitch.
The stone moved out of my way with no trouble. After all I was exiting the vault, so I must have completed the dungeon!
Next step, waterfall. Easy to find, as a dramatic natural feature they were everywhere. I reverse jumped to one nearby. Crystal clear water fell from a high cliff, creating a rainbow that made an idyllic place to sit and appreciate the beautiful textures. Lipstick on a pig.
There was a chance (a small one, but still) that they’d fixed the bug so my setup no longer worked. I hopped onto the rocks, beneath the waterfall. The rock I wanted was third from the left, every waterfall built exactly the same. I stood on the very edge of it and backed up, pixel by pixel. I fell off. My position had to be perfect.
I took a deep cleansing breath. I kept trying.
After a few more attempts, I managed it. I stood on thin air, my feet just beyond the edge of the rock. The new players would soon discover the shabby geometry. Maybe some already had, falling through the level or suffocating inside trees. But for me, it was time again to practice patience.
I started a macro that made me jump, then attempt to swim, over and over.
“Attempting swim up a waterfall?!” The game’s swim mechanic was aghast. “You have nary the skill level to do such a thing!”
“Now, now. They can do it,” said the XP tracker, “just for a teeny tiny moment.”
The swim mechanic harrumphed. “They can swim for that instant and not a second longer!
“Don’t forget the multipliers for swimming with all that armor.”
“They can try all day, they’re never getting up that waterfall. Mua-hahahahaha!”
I took off the VR headset and wiped the sweat from my face. The macro would take about an hour to get me to Swim 100. Good time for a break. I had to keep an eye on my screen, though. At any moment a mod might notice me, someone might get a notification something was wrong, and my plan would be ruined.
My dinner was a jumbo burrito and milkshake. I needed my strength for the next part.
My avatar had maxed out swim. Each jump now carried me several feet up the waterfall before the Salamander Plate pulled me back onto the questionable geometry.
I was now Level 10. For my new feat, I chose Fresh Meat. Monsters would now be more likely to notice and attack me. There was only one monster I was interested in.
I reverse jumped back to the nearest wood where my prey would be lurking. I had to be careful not to let anyone get a good look at my equipment. The wrong questions could lead to me getting banned, but I needed the gear for the next part.
I crouched to sneak as the terrain turned to sucking mud. Trees were sparse and giant insects flitted about so fast they seemed to be teleporting. Fresh Meat pulled aggro on them, but my ludicrously overpowered equipment made the fights no more than a click per bug.
As I walked through the muck, I heard a grunting sound. A large, lumpy beast shook off the brown goop and grumbled at me.
There you are little pig. Come and get me now.
The bristle-backed mud hog charged out of its soupy nest, squealing and slashing with its tusks. I dodged attack and waited for it to attack again.
The hog launched into an attack sequence of bites, gores, and headbutts. I blocked the attacks to reduce the damage. Then it exposed its flank to me, telegraphing the attack I was waiting for. The hog spun in a blur, a melee area of effect attack. Intended to be used when the hog was surrounded, but still part of its normal line up of moves.
I jumped over the hog as it spun, aiming for its exact axis of rotation, and swung the Axe of Earth’s Flame down on it. The pig died in a single blow, dropping a paltry amount of coin.
Dammit. The spinning pig glitch was difficult to pull off. The attack needed to be frame perfect, I needed to be in the perfect position, and it had to be during that one specific move. But it was worth it.
There was a strange bug when a mud hog died in just the right way, at just the right time. The fight ended, but the hog’s attack was still considered in progress against its last target. It became an artifact, still spinning, but with no stats. The result was a collision object rotating at incredible speeds and doing damage per frame of collision detection. With a frame rate powered by quantum computing, it resulted in nearly infinite damage per second of contact.
Traipsing through the mud, I swatted man-eating bugs from the sky and leapt over pig after pig. I gained enough levels to upgrade Fresh Meat to Seasoned, spawning more enemies in my zone. This was a work of endurance, jumping and striking over and over as time ticked away.
I had a dreadful thought. What if the Day One patch fixed the spinning pig glitch!? Ooooh, what a bitter irony that would be. I had fought with them to fix the spinning pigs for months.
“Got it! Yes!” I leapt from my chair in victory. I was now the proud owner of a spinning pig. It hovered, perpetually just to my right, ready to kill anything that could be killed.
I made my way back to the massive oak I had felled near the starting area. The spinning pig tore down trees and disintegrated foliage as I travelled. I managed to avoid any other players, though I was sure they’d investigate the swath of destruction I left in my wake. With a little maneuvering, I managed to drill the pig into the side of a massive boulder, carving twisted paths to conceal myself. It wasn’t perfect, but it would have to do while I went AFK.
Alright, time to get some rest. Then we kill God.
I didn’t sleep well. I was too anxious about logging in to find my character deleted with a ban notice, or discovering they’d managed to squeeze in an emergency patch.
You’ll be done soon, I told myself. It will be worth the lawsuits, the burning bridges, all of it.
My character was still in my makeshift pig cave, apparently undisturbed. I breathed a sigh of relief, then started on the next stage of my plan.
I returned to the stump of the great oak I’d punched to death yesterday. Trees had a 24 hour respawn cycle, and it was nearly time.
I stood on the stump and waited. It was meditative, listening to the birds and animals that populated the jungle. There was time to appreciate what the game had aspired to be. Blood, sweat, and tears poured into an amazing world. I felt a pang, knowing what I was about to do.
But amongst all that verdant foliage, all those spine covered monkeys, poisonous lizards, and collectible butterflies, there was still the spinning pig beside me. For all the love that went into this OO, it was sloth, greed, and arrogance that allowed this hog of unlimited destruction.
24 hours ticked by, and the geometry collision detection threw a fit.
“Two objects occupying the same space at the same time?! Absurd! I won’t hear of it!”
“What shall we do?” asked the physics engine.
“Send the player away as quick as possible!”
The physics engine gave a servile bow.
A great tree erupted beneath my feet and rocketed me directly upward. The game world shrank away as the clouds of the skybox rushed to meet me. I passed through them and entered the realm of the game’s final dungeon, The Palace of the Sky King.
Instead of falling back to earth, I began to swim. The mechanics for flying hadn’t been built yet, so for now the whole place was considered underwater. Multiple end-game content quests barricaded the doors of the Palace, great beasts and dragons holding keys that would unlock the doors. But, as I had not yet initiated those quests, the entire area was inert.
I passed through the gates like a ghost. A nasally voice crackled in my ear. “Sky King intro dialogue here.”
“Dammit, Claud, finish your game !” I yelled to no one.
The palace was an empty shell. The walls and floors had placeholder textures. But I had to forgive them, at least a little. This part of OO wasn’t meant to be encountered for at least a year. The quests’ difficulty was so great, the devs expected it to take tens of thousands of Level 100 players to storm the Palace together.
No one was supposed to be here for a long time.
I floated through the palace, clipping through walls, and into the Sky King’s throne room. There, the Sky King sat upon his throne of storms. Composed of light, hurricanes, and raw power, he held in one hand the golden Staff of Winds, the four winds of the earth churning like tornadoes on the top. His other hand held the Sword of Storms, the weapon with which he would smite the world. The weapon I had come for.
He was awe-inspiring, the love child of two genius devs who were subsequently fired for “performance-related insubordination”. I was no bigger than a flea to this titan.
I spoke a sort of prayer at his feet. “You deserved better than this, you big, beautiful bastard.”
The Sky King was unmoved. I turned, aligning the spinning pig to The Sky King’s foot. A credit to his immense difficulty, he took almost three seconds to die. He never moved, not even a death animation. His status simply changed from living to lootable. My XP counter didn’t even twitch.
“Who shall receive The Sky King’s XP?!” the game wondered.
“No one! He died of collision! He must have fallen! He’s awfully tall you know, long way to fall.”
“What of his treasure vault? Shall it be opened?”
“Of course! He dead, isn’t he?”
A hurricane’s eye appeared behind the throne. It led to the vaults where the most valuable treasures and God-tier equipment would appear. I wasn’t interested.
I looted The Sword of Storms from the Sky King’s body and clipped through the floor. Outside the Palace, I swam downward until I reached the normal skybox and began to plummet.
Splat. Dead. The pig spun victoriously.
The screen went dark and two options appeared: New Character or Continue, in a large green button. I seethed. Here was the core of the matter.
I hit Continue, and a new box appeared. “You have chosen continue your adventure! $3.87 has been charged to your account.”
They marketed their “Pay to live” system as a way to ensure high-level characters would cycle out over time. But that was where the lies began.
Better enjoy it that $3.87 while it’s still yours, Claud.
I was revived . Almost there. I unequipped the Sword of Storms and stored it in my inventory, then began scooping up handfuls of the nearest Common item. In this area, that was acorns. Soon I had seven stacks of 55 acorns.
For whatever reason, OO really hated the number 55. The odds of glitches increased dramatically if there were 55 of anything, and I knew how to how to trigger a bug 100% of the time. It was on this bug that my whole plan rested.
I arranged my inventory so the Sword of Storms was between the fifth and sixth stacks of acorns, then took off my headset and yanked the plug on my computer. The screen flashed white and turned off. I counted to five (superstition dies hard) and plugged it back in.
While my computer rebooted, and I started gathering on all the light sources in my room and turned them towards my face. I reviewed my script one last time. I logged in. That wretched intro played again. Click-click-click-click-click-click. Clickclickclickclickclickclick.
The Sword of Storms was a unique item, one of the strongest in the game. It had a power that could be used once every 30 days, Wrath of the Sky King. The weather in Origin Online could be anywhere from a pleasant day to a hurricane. Casting Wrath of the Sky King increased the weather’s severity by two steps. Sunny, Cloudy, Windy, Raining, Storm, Heavy Thunderstorm, Tornado, Hurricane, Storm of Judgment.
Normally, a player could only summon a Storm of Judgement if they used Wrath of the Sky King when there was already a tornado. But, nestled in my inventory between my stacks of 55 acorns, I had a neat little stack of 55 Swords of Storms.
Equip Sword of Storms, hotkey Wrath of the Sky King, cast. I swung the sword in a great arc over my head and the sky began to darken. The wind shook the trees. Wrath of the Sky King affected the entire server at once, except for the wielder of the Sword. But I had to hurry. The mods and devs would realize something was wrong very soon.
Equip, hotkey, cast. I discarded the legendary artifact after using it. Poof, gone forever. Now rain poured from the sky in blinding sheets and trees bowed their heads to my power.
Equip, hotkey, cast. The clouds began to twist and pucker overhead. Hail fell from the skies. In the distance I saw funnel clouds form and reach their questing fingers for buildings and characters to destroy.
Equip, hotkey, cast. Game over, ladies and gentlemen. I smoothed down my hair as arcs of purple and yellow lightning crawled through the clouds. The ground erupted where they struck. Balls of burning ice hurtled down, the rain turned to caustic acid, and the tornados became mile wide monstrosities that hunted their targets.
Equip, hotkey, cast.
Equip, hotkey, cast.
Equip, hotkey, cast.
“I say!” said the weather programming, “We’ve already reached the maximum possible weather severity. Whatever shall we do now?”
“We follow the rules!” the game’s logic engine replied. “If the spell is used in the presence of a tornado or higher, it causes a Storm of Judgement! I see tornados, don’t you?”
“Well, of course! But where shall we put the new Storm of Judgement? There’s already one right here!”
“Oh. I suppose there is. Ah well, just throw it on top of the old one!”
“Very good! And the others?”
“Add them to the pile! And don’t forget to award XP to the caster for anything the storm kills!
I watched in awe as the lightning became so dense it hid the clouds. Tornados merged together, as wide as continents. Acid rain fell like with the intensity of a waterfall. Burning hail ravaged the earth in great columns.
Everything everywhere died.
In less than 30 seconds, I had become the only living thing in Origins Online. My XP bar filled again and again, and small window appeared.
“Congratulations! You’re the first player to reach the Level 100! As a reward, we’re offering you the chance to livestream your reaction to every player, all over the world! You’ll have 5 minutes. Please no swearing or your other rewards will be null and void. Click the OK button to begin the stream.”
I yanked off my VR headset just in time for my face to appear on the screen, captured by my computer’s built in camera. I smiled at the millions who were watching me right now. Showtime!
“Hello, everyone. My name is Rebecca Vanderstint, and I’m the daughter of Origins Online lead creator, Claud Vanderstint. I orchestrated this event to tell you that my father is a liar and a cheat.
“I was the principle tester for Origins Online, and I learned things Con Man Claud doesn’t want you to know. For example, everyone knows that resurrecting a character costs money. But are you aware there are invisible stat changes every time you resurrect? That they make you more likely to find rare items, but also make you susceptible to crits and sudden death? Your character becomes more valuable to compel you to pay the ever-increasing fees. And believe me, those fees ramp up fast. OO is the world’s most overhyped pay-to-win. Its designed to be unfair, to rob you, and to take advantage of you for playing it.”
I paused to let that information sink in and remind myself not to talk too fast. There’s your game Claud, now for your reputation.
“Claud Vanderstint is also guilty of sexual harassment and assault on multiple women on his design team. He has withheld promised overtime pay to employees and fired them when they try to get their money. Their royalties end up in his pocket. And he knows his team of lawyers can drag out a case and bankrupt anyone who tries to bring them to court.”
Now for your freedom.
“Claud Vanderstint is also involved in tax evasion and fraud. His entire board of directors is in on it. They don’t intend to pay a dime on their profits from OO. Anyone who digs into his finances will find evidence. I swear to testify before any court on any of these claims. Furthermore—"
The window closed. Time’s up. I finally settled back into my chair, the muscles in my back sighing in relief. I heard the door to my room open, and I spun around to greet him.
“Good game, Dad.”
2023.04.26 16:40 itsbutt My Magenta Bear-lien arrived today (on alien day)! (pics inside)
Click for photos (imgur)
Lyra, my Magenta Bear-lien, made it home today with the Blue Bear-lien Buddy (heh alliteration) and it just so happens to be Alien Day (usually my orders come in a day faster than this so it's a funny coincidence).
I've always loved alien stuff so I'm really happy to have them home! I know people were wondering about the colour and such so I tried to get a half decent representation of that. I know on some screens they seem more purple or more pink or brighter or darker so I also compared the colours to those on the Toadally Tye-Die Frog and the Purple Hops Frog just so people might be able to get a clearer idea of where they land colour-wise. Magenta is pink of course but I know sometimes it can vary a bit.
She's also not super vibrant which I'm really happy about! Mine has a slightly wonky nose but it's not too obvious and I don't mind flaws, I think it adds character. The little one (still gotta come up with a name) is a lovely shade of blue I think!
submitted by itsbutt to buildabear [link] [comments]
Lyra, my Magenta Bear-lien, made it home today with the Blue Bear-lien Buddy (heh alliteration) and it just so happens to be Alien Day (usually my orders come in a day faster than this so it's a funny coincidence).
I've always loved alien stuff so I'm really happy to have them home! I know people were wondering about the colour and such so I tried to get a half decent representation of that. I know on some screens they seem more purple or more pink or brighter or darker so I also compared the colours to those on the Toadally Tye-Die Frog and the Purple Hops Frog just so people might be able to get a clearer idea of where they land colour-wise. Magenta is pink of course but I know sometimes it can vary a bit.
She's also not super vibrant which I'm really happy about! Mine has a slightly wonky nose but it's not too obvious and I don't mind flaws, I think it adds character. The little one (still gotta come up with a name) is a lovely shade of blue I think!
2023.02.06 09:14 RelevantLemon36 Alright
“Alright” has already received tons of attention from the media and the general public, both positive and negative. For example, on the positive side, due to the theme of hope, “Alright” has, in a sense, become an anthem for the Black Lives Matter movement; in terms of a negative reception, Fox News anchors have commented on how they think that hip-hop, especially songs like alright do “more damage than racism.” Despite the large audiences reached by Kendrick Lamar’s alright, I have yet to see posts that focus extensively on the literary devices used by Kendrick Lamar in “Alright” and how they help him portray a message. Thus, I am using this post to share my thoughts on how Kendrick uses contrasts and shifts throughout alright to portray a message of optimism that is driven by past pains and struggles.
The overall structure of “Alright” uses significant amounts of contrast. The track starts by describing how Kendrick has always had to work hard. Then, the song immediately shifts into repeating how “we gon’ be alright. The next verse then goes into describing more of the struggles that Kendrick faces. This alternating structure more or less continues for the rest of the song; however, at times, the time spent on optimism versus struggle changes.
Part of what gives this somewhat alternating structure power is how the sections focused on optimism about the future use repetition, whereas Kendrick describes many different struggles. In addition to repeating the whole phrase, “we gon’ be alright,” Kendrick also uses alliteration: “But if God got us then we gon’ be alright.” The repetition of the “g” sound primarily makes the song flow better, which shouldn’t be discredited because it contributes to how “Alright” became one of the most well-known hip-hop songs.
Similarly, when Kendrick describes his optimism for the future in a general sense but describes the issues he has faced more specifically. In fact, when discussing the future, the only phrase Kendrick is about how “we will be alright,” besides when he raps, “I write til’ I’m right with God.” On the other hand, while discussing issues, Kendrick uses many examples connecting to topics from police brutality to his own ego. Additionally, Kendrick uses metaphors, allusions, irony, and other literary devices to describe his struggles in a more abstract way.
Diving further into individual word choices, in the fifth line of the intro, Kendrick raps, “Nazareth, I’m fucked up.” The direct comparison between Nazareth, Jesus’s place of birth, and “I’m fucked up” compares Kendrick to Jesus in a couple of ways. One way that Kendrick could be compared to Jesus based on this line is how both he and Jesus came from cities that were tough to grow up in yet were still able to prosper. Additionally, by describing himself as “fucked up” adjacent to Nazareth, Kendrick could be comparing himself to Jesus because Jesus was beaten up many times and was crucified.
submitted by RelevantLemon36 to KendrickLamar [link] [comments]
The overall structure of “Alright” uses significant amounts of contrast. The track starts by describing how Kendrick has always had to work hard. Then, the song immediately shifts into repeating how “we gon’ be alright. The next verse then goes into describing more of the struggles that Kendrick faces. This alternating structure more or less continues for the rest of the song; however, at times, the time spent on optimism versus struggle changes.
Part of what gives this somewhat alternating structure power is how the sections focused on optimism about the future use repetition, whereas Kendrick describes many different struggles. In addition to repeating the whole phrase, “we gon’ be alright,” Kendrick also uses alliteration: “But if God got us then we gon’ be alright.” The repetition of the “g” sound primarily makes the song flow better, which shouldn’t be discredited because it contributes to how “Alright” became one of the most well-known hip-hop songs.
Similarly, when Kendrick describes his optimism for the future in a general sense but describes the issues he has faced more specifically. In fact, when discussing the future, the only phrase Kendrick is about how “we will be alright,” besides when he raps, “I write til’ I’m right with God.” On the other hand, while discussing issues, Kendrick uses many examples connecting to topics from police brutality to his own ego. Additionally, Kendrick uses metaphors, allusions, irony, and other literary devices to describe his struggles in a more abstract way.
Diving further into individual word choices, in the fifth line of the intro, Kendrick raps, “Nazareth, I’m fucked up.” The direct comparison between Nazareth, Jesus’s place of birth, and “I’m fucked up” compares Kendrick to Jesus in a couple of ways. One way that Kendrick could be compared to Jesus based on this line is how both he and Jesus came from cities that were tough to grow up in yet were still able to prosper. Additionally, by describing himself as “fucked up” adjacent to Nazareth, Kendrick could be comparing himself to Jesus because Jesus was beaten up many times and was crucified.
2022.12.19 10:14 LiquidKonfusionPlaya Album of the Year #4: Black Star - No Fear of Time
Artist: Black Star
Album: No Fear of Time
Listen:
Background:
In 1998, Mos Def and Talib Kweli released their debut album under the name Black Star, an album and duo that would quickly become a widely celebrated hip hop classic. The name comes from the Black Star Line, an early 20th century shipping line started by Marcus Garvey, with the aim of coordinating shipping between the African diaspora in an effort to promote black social and economic independence. The album, Mos Def and Talib Kweli Are Black Star, is rooted in the Pan-Africanism of Garvey and a promotion of black art, culture, and life. The Black Star duo would go their separate ways following this 1998 debut, with extensive solo careers and one-off collaborations being all that was produced under this Black Star legacy. They announced a second album in 2011, to be titled Black Star Aretha, however other than its first single and another track the project never saw the light of day. Enough time had now passed between the original Black Star album and the present that Mos Def had even changed his name to yasiin bey. Rumours in the late 2010s began to hype up the release of Black Star 2 once again, this time proclaiming it would be fully procured by the legendary Madlib. In 2019, the album was supposedly done, but with no release in sight and various complaints over it being held back from the artists. After 24 years however, in May 2022, the duo would in fact release the Black Star 2 album, titled No Fear of Time.Review:
The album’s title No Fear of Time is seemingly a declaration of the two artists’ mantra going into its creation. With 24 years between the original Black Star and its sequel, the time between each release plays a central role in the album. The title suggests that this time between records, this 24 years, is not something to be feared. The actual music stands for itself, and it doesn’t matter how long it took. The passing of two decades between releases did not hinder the process of the album’s creation, but most likely aided it into the final product it is today. Therefore, the listener should not fear time, but simply take in the everlasting truth of the music. The album art is this image, the cover to a photography book on the Kanaval of Haiti, depicting two Haitian boys in carnival dress. The image is edited to place these two figures in a mystical cosmos, with a space of light and stars at their back. This final cover places the culture of Haiti and diaspora in this space setting, engaging with an Afro-futurist formulation of black culture. In the 21st century, the rapper’s choose to set their Black Star line in the heights of space, displaying the evolution and expansion of Marcus Garvey’s vision into Afro-Futurism.The album opens on the ambient intro to ‘o.G.’, a sparse setting with soon erupts into drum rolls and the voices of yasiin and Talib. A bumping bass traverses these drum fills, as dub yells sound over Madlib’s beat. yasiin’s verse comes into this mix, teeming with spiritualism, Biggie quotes (“Shilahlah, live from Bedford Stuyvesant, the livest one”) and closing with the triumphant words “The light is not afraid of the dark at all, that part, Black Star”. yasiin then also sings the song’s hook, “I want to thank you for helping me reach the understanding, / the time is relative and the truth is everlasting”, words that appear to be this album’s primary message, linking to its title and appearing multiple times throughout. This primary message is a call to free oneself from a preoccupation with time and it’s passing, and to focus on the more everlasting elements of life and truth rather than the material. The song briefly cuts out before moving into Talib’s verse, which just as intense a declaration, making threats to fascists (“We gon' bash us some fascists and **** them up”) and celebrating the self (“My birthday is a holiday, mark it down on your calendars”). The song then closes on the wisdom of yasiin’s hook.
The second song, ‘So be it’, opens on a the Madlib flip of a looping fuzzed bass sample, a driving beat that brings energy to the verses over it. yasiin’s verse is a skilful display of rapping style and technique, using rhymes, assonance and alliteration to move from one colourful image to another in quick succession. The verse shows no sign of slowing even when Madlib’s sample seemingly run outs beneath it, as bey just keeps rapping. The emcee proclaims “It's bigger than hip-hop, hypes, and wicked government”, another testament to the everlasting nature of rhymes that transcend. Style comes to the forefront in lines such as the surreal imagery of “Van-glorious, phantasmagoria, / Crack-panned Oreo on each and every all of you” or “Bey, torpedo, blast match the ego / Sniper on the range, sniper bang enough, reload / RPG to give free power people”, where freedom is violently claimed with a multitude of weapons. This then leads straight into Talib’s verse, with the duo even continuing the rhyme scheme as if the entire track is just one continuous slew of bars. His raps lead the listener through the months of the year in an explicit attention to the passing of time, such as May’s “Black Star sequel”, “November when we come for that office, black POTUS” or “Colder than the winter wind, day after December 10” which expertly repurposes a multisyllabic Mos Def line from 1998. This again highlights the celebration of time passing, not the fear of it. The song then closes on bey’s singing, as the first break from pure rapping in the entire song comes almost 4 minutes in.
At the forefront of ‘Sweetheart. Sweethard. Sweetodd.’ is Madlib’s chopped up soul sample, as vocals, chords and bass cut in and out in an imperfect but soulful loop. Kweli comes first here, with the standout line “This the Black Star line like Marcus, the cargo / Is all the stardust that we spark up”, which calls upon the Afro-futurist Pan-Africanism and the carrying of Marcus Garvey’s torch in the two emcees, as their album carries the cosmic cargo of “stardust”. yasiin’s verse follows, a ret-telling of a conversation on the nature of love. He recounts, “One said, I’m too noble for simple love, / Said the other, have you ever been noble enough?” where two voices debate the nobility of a simple love. This is followed by the line “But never mind, clever fool, I love you still”, where even the simple love between the two voices allows them to come together despite their disagreement. The height of the track comes in yasiin’s own soulful singing out to a “Sweetheart”,which echoes several times and closes the song.
The next track,‘My favourite band’ is a solo showing by bey, and begins with another of Madlib’s soulful loops and the sounding of bird whistles. The verse is a powerful one, as yasiin is a preoccupied with the spiritual and the metaphysical nature of things. He opens rapping “This is for my favourite band of human beings / The faithful, the graceful, the tragic and the classic”, addressing his words to all who listen, in any position of life, with any degree of faith, grace, or tragedy. The verse continues, “The evidence of things unseen, the book of life / The mansions of the moon, the bones of Fir’awn”, a reference to body of the pharaoh Rameses II who persecuted Moses and the children of Israel. According to Islamic scripture, these bones would be preserved and displayed as a message to future generations, a message throughout time to all human beings. Later in the verse yasiin also raps “My Umi told it to me just the other day […] I hope you get what you want / And that you want what you need”, a reference to his classic song ‘Umi Says’, as well as the more recent ‘NAW’ from his 2016 album. This line imparts the wisdom of his ‘Umi’, meaning mother in Arabic, which expresses the vision of needs and wants coalescing together, without any tendency for the inequality of a society based on wants alone. For yasiin, the two should come together, so that everyone gets what they need both physically and spiritually, and this should leave them satisfied and happy in life.
After another spacey ambient section, the opening, eerie piano line begins the track ‘The main thing is to keep the main thing the main thing’ or ‘TMT’ for short. The recurring monotone utterance of “TMT — f**** white supremacy” is muttered by both rappers throughout the song, a powerful mantra which aligns with the eeriness of the instrumental. yasiin’s verse engages with the album’s title in lines such as “Local time, all ages / Forever is the current event / Life on this side is quick, quick”, where the everlasting ‘forever’ is what he is preoccupied with, not the quickness of life but any existence in the other side. His verse also closes with a shoutout to J Dilla, who’s tragic passing places him in this space of the ‘forever’. Talib’s verse is an answer to yasiin posing the question “What is white supremacy?”, to which labels it “Mental illness”, an irrational state of mind. He continues on these lines later in the verse with “Don't believe you superior to the darker races / Just means you inferior living darker places”, where racism and white supremacy is described as a dark, pitiable state of mind.
The album’s following track is ‘Yonders’, where gunshots open Kweli’s verse as he raps “Shots fired / You say your block is like The Wire, I am not inspired”. These lines suggest the rapper’s boredom of both the actual violence and the glorified portrayals of it in America, where the rapper’s attention is markedly turned the material problems of the African American community. bey alternatively opens his verse with a date, ‘January 32nd’, painting the surreal image of an inaccessible time beyond time, chasing after a more spiritual approach. The same verse closes with an explanation of the song’s title, “Way out way raw, way warm, way cold / Yonders”, as it seems the two emcees a directing their raps to the similarly way out space of ‘yonders’, a place defined by its being beyond them.
The album then moves into its solo Kweli showing in the next track, ‘Supreme alchemy’. Here Madlib’s beat is a jazzy loop of cymbals, hi hats and piano chords, a relaxed backdrop over which Talib rhymes. He opens describing the soundtrack of Black Star’s creative process, stating “At the crib, we listen to Madlib, / Hi-Tek, Dilla beat tapes and that's it”, which paints the image of a scene where these three producers beats collide and transform alongside the emcees to create the Black Star sound. Later in the verse he represents the pride in his blackness through the line “Descendant of a king, I got Negus in my bloodline” using the reclaiming Ethiopian term for a king, as well as proclaiming the joy of freedom from the music industry and how he can “Celebrate escaping from the industry to get away / Seen the same kind of fate that turned Dumile to Metal Face”, which describes its exploitative ways through the story of how one rapper became the masked villain MF DOOM just to spite this industry. The jazzy beat from DOOM’s own Madvillainy collaborator then rides out into the next track.
The next song is ‘Freequency’, where a misspelling places the additional word ‘Free’ to the meaning of the title. Black Thought’s verse is the first to shine, a raw onslaught of rhymes full of mythical allusions (“Descend into darkness like black Orpheus”), self-comparisons to black poets (“an American gangster slash Langston Hughes”), and his final lines “If you tryna go the distance, liberate your mind / Your soul gon' follow, it ain't far behind / As long as you're not hollow, it ain't hard to find / I personally transcend space all the time”. Thought connects his verse to the the floating word ‘Free’ which hovers over the track and fastens to its title, proclaiming a freedom of mind and soul to be achieved. All this is atop a beat of triumphant horn stabs and ocean crashes which Madlib creates. Kweli and yasiin follow with their own verses, following similar themes of liberation. yasiin sings the outro of “Waves all over the place”, placing this imagery as the song’s culmination. The image may call upon the sea and the waves which carried slave ships, as even in the modern age the waves offer a glimpse of the violence which occurred upon them. As well as this however, the waves emphasise a contrast, that of open spaces, beyond spaces, where freedom can be attained and an identity can be carved out. Overall, the duality of such an image echoes out the album’s penultimate moment.
The final song on the album is its title track, ‘No fear of time’. Madlib laces the track with stabbing dub bass and reversed drums, as the track echoes out the album’s culminating message. Kweli’s verse is an attack on the thought processes of racism such as “They said a wound create capital but that was rape” and “they assume that racism is logical”. A short refrain then bridges the verses together, where bey sings amidst wistful horns. His verse then begins with the esoteric imagery; “A message from the ancient future, a fresh fossil / A piece of the buried gospel that the Earth refused to swallow / A seed grown into a tall tree” - full of contradictions, symbolism and the metaphysical description of an all-encompassing message. He laters raps about how “Black Star reconvened” so long after their debut, a focus of this song, ending his verse on the creation of a new Black Star project where “God give us the design and we assemble an ark and just float”. The song and ultimately the album then ends on the same chorus which opened the record; “I want to thank you for helping me reach the understanding”, this time sung by Yummy Bingham. A speech by Greg Tate overlays this closing, detailing the strengths of rap music and what hip hop offers to the world. The album therefore closes on the message it conveyed from its very opening, the greatness of hip hop and a proclamation that the listener should not fear the passing of time, as the albums, emcees and landmarks of the music will be cemented within that passing time, not lost to it.
Prior to the actual album’s release, the freestyle ‘Mineral Mountain’ with Black Thought announced the return of Black Star with Madlib. The three emcees take the instrumental ‘The New Normal’ from Madlib’s 2021 Sound Ancestors album, and each freestyle a verse. This is signalled by yasiin’s opening lines “I wrote something to this” which lead straight into the rest of the freestyle. His opening verse then ends on the naming of four passed emcees “on Pac, on Big, on Nip, and on Phife”, in a similar manner to his verse on ‘Mathematics’ in 1999, but this time updated to include Nipsey Hussle and Phife Dawg. Kweli follows, with similar lyrical callback in “8th light shine bright when my brothers get in the booth”, an homage to the second track on the 1998 Black Star album. The final verse is then delivered by Black Thought (who’s almost become an honorary member of Black Star with his several appearances). The line, “The thing about graffiti is it ain’t cursive”, contrasts an accepted, formal language versus the language of street, empowering the “graffiti” despite its cultural informality. The song’s hook then closes, “Standards of conduct, standards of beauty / Mineral mountain, the inevitable miracle”, which is delivered by yasiin.
Several songs were removed from the 2019 edition of the album but have leaked since the release. ‘Tribute’ is yasiin’s verse from ‘My favourite band’ over an alternate beat, with an extra Kweli verse, and ‘JGB’ is a posse cut of Nas, Talib, yasiin, and Common over a soulful Madlib loop.
Overall, after a 24 year gap the Black Star sequel is an excellent follow up to what was originally just a one-off collaboration. Political and spiritual lyrics from each rapper lace the project, with stand out rhymes and wisdom layered into every verse, and the production from Madlib is everything that could be expected from this dream collaboration. The record’s message and title rings true in its every moment, time is not to be feared, but embraced and celebrated for all passing time gives us. I mean, is it not the passing of time that gave us this very album? Even if it took 24 years to arrive.
Questions:
- Did this album meet the 24 year expectations?
- How do yasiin and Kweli stand as veteran artists?
- How does Madlib’s production compare to the original Black Star soundscape?
2022.12.10 03:19 Yokono666 Theory: Greg is a mob-hired Bounty Hunter, likes Tanya, and maybe isn't bad. Discuss.
Greg, Tanya's parents, and the mob.
*I don't really think this but it could be a 'Greg is actually nice' theory.
If Tanya's dad was mob affiliated, maybe his rival mob guy hired Greg, who is deployed to kill Tanya after her mom's death to free up whatever land/estate she has. Or to take out Tanya to pay back shit her dad did. So the person to gain the most from Tanya's death would be whoever hired Greg, and also Greg....but Greg kinda likes her and 'it's not the time'...
If Greg wants to protect Tanya, maybe he wants to fake their deaths and keep her alive, and make everyone think he died too so he can stop being a hit-man/bounty hunter for the mob. So they plant a bomb in the room she rented at White Lotus, bring her to Polermo to Quentin's, distract her so she doesn't think about Greg, have someone elses' bodies in the room, everyone thinks Tanya and Greg are dead, they float away on Quentin's yacht, and all go live happily ever after away from the mob that is after Tanya's money, and a couple random dead locals pay the price.
Greg could be like Neri in the Godfather: Neri is identified as a capo for the Corleone family on an organization chart. He also carries out the execution of Michael's brother Fredo Corleone, under Michael's orders: while out fishing together on Lake Tahoe, Al Neri shoots Fredo in the back of the head.
Obviously, Quentin is friendly with the mob, but the rival gang. Maybe not just Niccolo. This is how he met Greg. And so they are in cahoots not to swindle Tanya, but to swindle the other rival mob gang and make them think Greg and Tanya are dead 'he would do anything for the cowboy'.
Jack is the one who has to kill the decoy bodies and put them in Tanya's room. That's his dark hole. He feels bad about it. Maybe Portia has to be sacrificed if she sees anything, Greg was mad Portia was there because now he has to protect her too, or she has to be collateral damage.
The way to distract Tanya is to get the gays to take her on an amazing trip to the palazzo to see opera and get ravished and drugged and doted on. And get Tanya out of the way, most importantly.
In the extremely unlikely case that Greg is actually her protector and not a bounty hunter and actually in love with her...or bounty hunter-turned-nice, he'll die from miscommunication...Greg, you just should have fucking texted your new wife more ffs.
And if Greg doesn't die and Tanya and him stay together...he better start fucking treating her better!
Other Thoughts
MW has a lot of alliteration in the character names. Greg Hunt:Hit Man...it just sounds like the best TV show ever and would be an amazing TWL spinoff show.
*Tanya might also have just been writing checks to Greg for his 'ailments' without looking at any bills, and he could have just been sending it straight to his boss..they want to get rid of her before she spends the entire fortune at TWL, because it seems she just hops from one resort to the next, and is even a spokesperson! Does Tanya get paid for being a spokesperson I wonder?
*Greg Hunt: Mob Hit-Man is hired to kill Tanya in season 1. Since her mother had just died, she apparently inherited the entire estate. Was Tanya living with her mom in like a Grey Gardens situation? Or was Tanya more independent? It seems it's kinda the latter, and they were co-dependent. WHAT IS TANYA'S BACKSTORY I need to read the book.
*I have never believed Greg is sick, simply because sick people can't swim like beasts like did all the time. he also ignored Tanya, and got her drunk, it seemed obvious he was pulling things with her to see how much he could get away with and how oblivious she is.
*Prenup theory is here, I don't think it's an angle. I also don't think anything she did was that bad, I party like that all the time...She saw that photo of Greg, knew he was lying somehow, and made out with Niccolo...I bet she'll stop it anyway.
submitted by Yokono666 to TheWhiteLotusHBO [link] [comments]
*I don't really think this but it could be a 'Greg is actually nice' theory.
If Tanya's dad was mob affiliated, maybe his rival mob guy hired Greg, who is deployed to kill Tanya after her mom's death to free up whatever land/estate she has. Or to take out Tanya to pay back shit her dad did. So the person to gain the most from Tanya's death would be whoever hired Greg, and also Greg....but Greg kinda likes her and 'it's not the time'...
If Greg wants to protect Tanya, maybe he wants to fake their deaths and keep her alive, and make everyone think he died too so he can stop being a hit-man/bounty hunter for the mob. So they plant a bomb in the room she rented at White Lotus, bring her to Polermo to Quentin's, distract her so she doesn't think about Greg, have someone elses' bodies in the room, everyone thinks Tanya and Greg are dead, they float away on Quentin's yacht, and all go live happily ever after away from the mob that is after Tanya's money, and a couple random dead locals pay the price.
Greg could be like Neri in the Godfather: Neri is identified as a capo for the Corleone family on an organization chart. He also carries out the execution of Michael's brother Fredo Corleone, under Michael's orders: while out fishing together on Lake Tahoe, Al Neri shoots Fredo in the back of the head.
Obviously, Quentin is friendly with the mob, but the rival gang. Maybe not just Niccolo. This is how he met Greg. And so they are in cahoots not to swindle Tanya, but to swindle the other rival mob gang and make them think Greg and Tanya are dead 'he would do anything for the cowboy'.
Jack is the one who has to kill the decoy bodies and put them in Tanya's room. That's his dark hole. He feels bad about it. Maybe Portia has to be sacrificed if she sees anything, Greg was mad Portia was there because now he has to protect her too, or she has to be collateral damage.
The way to distract Tanya is to get the gays to take her on an amazing trip to the palazzo to see opera and get ravished and drugged and doted on. And get Tanya out of the way, most importantly.
In the extremely unlikely case that Greg is actually her protector and not a bounty hunter and actually in love with her...or bounty hunter-turned-nice, he'll die from miscommunication...Greg, you just should have fucking texted your new wife more ffs.
And if Greg doesn't die and Tanya and him stay together...he better start fucking treating her better!
Other Thoughts
MW has a lot of alliteration in the character names. Greg Hunt:Hit Man...it just sounds like the best TV show ever and would be an amazing TWL spinoff show.
*Tanya might also have just been writing checks to Greg for his 'ailments' without looking at any bills, and he could have just been sending it straight to his boss..they want to get rid of her before she spends the entire fortune at TWL, because it seems she just hops from one resort to the next, and is even a spokesperson! Does Tanya get paid for being a spokesperson I wonder?
*Greg Hunt: Mob Hit-Man is hired to kill Tanya in season 1. Since her mother had just died, she apparently inherited the entire estate. Was Tanya living with her mom in like a Grey Gardens situation? Or was Tanya more independent? It seems it's kinda the latter, and they were co-dependent. WHAT IS TANYA'S BACKSTORY I need to read the book.
*I have never believed Greg is sick, simply because sick people can't swim like beasts like did all the time. he also ignored Tanya, and got her drunk, it seemed obvious he was pulling things with her to see how much he could get away with and how oblivious she is.
*Prenup theory is here, I don't think it's an angle. I also don't think anything she did was that bad, I party like that all the time...She saw that photo of Greg, knew he was lying somehow, and made out with Niccolo...I bet she'll stop it anyway.
2022.10.18 19:35 Ben10Extreme A Quirky New World: Grand Witches
Salem smiles serenely as she was coming into the room with a freshly made cup of tea, with several tendrils around her setting things up and cleaning the room around her. Sounds of vacuuming and sweeping ensued, along with the wiping of windows, before they all retracted. The place now looked much cleaner than before.
"Greetings, one and all. This is your friendly neighborhood Grandma Grimm. Have you all been well? Are you getting proper rest? It's important to rest your mind as well as your heart and soul."
She hummed while sipping some of her tea, whilst sitting herself on her rocking chair.
"Hm? You're disappointed that you don't get to see me bathing again this time? Oh my, I have quite an admiring audience. Someone still considers me enticing. Perhaps another time, as I'm already quite clean."
She teased while setting her tea to the side, grabbing a book as she gently began rocking back and forth in her chair.
"This shouldn't take too much of your time, don't fret. Although if you find other reasons to stick around, please feel free. I don't quite look like it, but I rather enjoy the company. Now let's der here..."
Salem begins flipping through her book while rocking in her chair, before smiling and finding the pages she was looking for.
She hums while pushing some hair away from her face.
"If you've heard of witches before, the meaning of the word tends to mean a person(particularly a woman) who is credited with having malignant supernatural powers. In fairy tales they are usually depicted as old and wearing a pointed black hat. They also tend to live in solitary."
She tilts her head while lightly poking her cheek.
"Well...I am quite old...and I live in solitary, away from today's society..."
A tendril reaches out and places a pointed witch hat on her head. She smiles and points to it.
"Oh, look! I even have a black hat to go with my outfit! It seems like I fit the description, don't I?"
Salem playfully levitates in the air, a broom floating next to her, and she sits on it while sensually posing one arm behind her head and one leg crossed over the other.
"How do I look? Hmhmhmhm....have I bewitched you? Did you fall under my spell? Perhaps willingly?~"
She chuckles and shakes her head, shrugging.
"No, perhaps not. I probably better fit the definition for witch as ugly and ill-tempered, don't I? I definitely didn't have the best maturity in the world back then, despite my sophisticated demeanor. Let's continue."
Salem smiles as she leans down and continues reading through the book while levitating casually, leaving her nicely voluptuous rear in the air, emphasized by her black form-fitting robe.
"In a basic sense, a witch is usually a woman with magical, supernatural power. While it's usually attributed to malignant, cruel, evil witches...it's not the end all be all of their name. At the core, the beginning of the word's existence, it mostly meant 'female magic user'. The depiction and reception of witches differentiate across generations, genres, and audiences. It's. Simply more common for them to be depicted as evil, hence the alliteration 'Wicked Witch'. While the term 'mage' or 'magician' is attributed to magic users in general."
Salem blinks as she hears a low meow. She turns to see a black cat hopping on to the table, lightly sitting down. Salem smiles.
"Ah, witches also tend to have cats as companions and familiars. Especially black ones!"
"... Salem, this isn't funny. Change me back. Mreow."
Blake's deadpan voice left the cat's muzzle.
Salem coos as she picks up the black cat under her arms and snuggles her, rubbing her cheek against hers.
"You look oh so cute like this!"
Blake's current aloof expression came with a very annoyed 'help me' look in her eyes.
"I'm never gonna live this down, meow."
Salem sets her down and continues reading her book.
"Back to the matter at hand, we've reach the core of today's subject. And that's the Grand Witches."
Salem clears her throat.
"In this precious tale, the Grand Witches are seen as such, because be it through their own actions, abilities, and efforts, they've displayed the most potential to direct and guide the fate of the age they live in, out of everyone else. This means fates, destinies, and prophecies they show no approval of tend a high risk of being thwarted. And those who 'walk in their shadow' (those who accompany them) end up capable of the same."
Salem smiles towards Blake, who rolls her eyes and uses her paw to turn the page for her.
"The term didn't quite exist back in the Barren Era, but the first four to manage these kinds of feats are the Four Maidens. I never would have been able to succeed in restoring Remnant if it wasn't for them. They directed the fate of their world in a new direction. They just needed a bit of...'motivation' from me, is all."
Blake flips to another page.
"Come on, mreow! How long are you going to keep me like this?"
Salem smiles sweetly and pets and scratches the top of her head, much to her annoyance. Further annoying her was that she actually began purring from the affection.
"Patience, young Blake. Now then, the Grand Witches of the Dark Ages."
Salem reads them off.
"Having played a pivotal role in ending the War of the Dead, thus sparing the living from the wrath of those dead and undead, Maria Calavera was classified as a Grand Witch due to surviving and then thriving past the worst period of the Dark Age. She is the oldest of the Grand Witches, yet despite a wrinkle here and there as well as grayed hair, she's still quite beautiful, and is as capable as she was in her prime, if not even MORE so. She currently possesses the MOST supernaturally powerful, exceeding amounts of Aura out of everyone. No one has come close to such a refined mastery and connection of/to the power of their soul like she does. She holds special mention for personally mentoring another current Grand Witch, and a future one, both being mother and daughter. She is also best friends with the father of another future Grand Witch, further contributing to her belief in the strong connections between souls."
"Of all the current major headquarters, Beacon is the most well known for producing, guiding, gathering, and supporting extraordinary heroes, explorers, adventurers, knights, etc. Glynda taking authority of Beacon means that she's placed herself in a position to influence how the next generation shall shape the new age. This is essential, because she guards an ancient library that holds all of Remnant's history and continually records it, so she knows what events must not be repeated. Her psychic abilities means she always keeps these things in mind, a these histories also give way to new stories. She plays a key part in Oscar Pine becoming his own kind of High Wizard beyond merely being Ozpin's successor, and how to build upon his own kind of wisdom and understanding of the world and how to help progress it."
"Born within a tribe where the weak are meant to be discarded and the strong continue on without them, Raven had espoused similar beliefs in her youth. However, once she saw that the Branwen Tribe was prepared to sacrifice their weakest link, her younger twin brother Qrow Branwen, to contract an ancient demon, after spiriting away the youngest children first, she didn't hesitate to cut down half of her own tribe to protect him. She killed the other half entirely when they tried the same with her daughter Yang Xiao Long years later. Both times her love for her family outweighed her once adamant loyalty to her tribe, which shaped her to one of the most merciless warriors on Remnant purely for their sake. On top of that, her mastery and understanding of all methods of swordsmanship leads to creating high quality blades used by many, from enhanced durability up to her own use of blades that cut through dimensions, or even time. The potential of the sword matches the sword wielder's will, and Raven is a woman of indomitable will."
"Summer Rose was a lost and lonely girl who was taken in by a surprisingly kind witch. After growing up on her care, she proved to be a prodigy in wielding her Inner Light, indicated by her Silver Eyes. Pushing onwards, she went on to make numerous connections with various beasts from normal, to ancient, to mystical, to mythical, to legendary. Helping them through various problems and protecting them from other threats indebted many to her. Some have taken her to being the 'Silver Guardian Wolf Goddess' due to her usage of her wolf form, her silver light, and how protective she is. Notably, she's rather embarrassed by the 'Goddess' part. Though few can blame them once they see her power and capabilities for themselves. Summer Rose is considered the best at using her Inner Light out of anyone and everyone in her lineage, discovering new advancements to the powers that no one before her has. Few Grimm can continually withstand the might of her light."
Salem sighs, briefly raising a hand to fan herself, pulling on her to be slightly for airing, which briefly revealed the top of her bust.
"Whew. That was a bit of a mouthful. Now then, let's briefly move onto the possible new Grand Witches of the Rebirth Era, each possessing supernatural amounts of potential, and how they could be seen as special threats to be targeted by their enemies. Blake, if you will?"
"If I do this, will you change me back?"
"Of course! It'll go by quick, I promise.~"
Blake rolled her eyes and sighed, before using her paw to turn the page, sitting on her haunches. Her turn to read.
"Pyrrha Nikos has immense fighting potential and capabilities, leading her on a path to being one of the best warriors in Remnant's history. She is the one many bet on when they want a high chance of ensured victory. This isn't a story of hard work overcoming raw talent. Or natural talent being all that matters. But dedicated effort, experience, and intense determination is what it takes to bring out the best of your talents. No one in the world is born completely and utterly talentless. And what people will remember even more than the envy of your talents, is what you go on to do with them. She embodies the personal strength to defy a fate you disapprove of or to fulfill a fate that you do. To choose yourself to be the one who makes that kind of decision, and to make it succeed. That is the power of choice and self determination. It takes a while before she can convince Cinder that she too wields this same power, as many have been thanks to her magnetic-like charisma."
"Penny Polendina is a young woman whose ability has the potential advances of magical and technological powers. She represents a future of further combinations between magic and super technology, possessing extraordinary abilities that neither can achieve on their own. In her hands, science and magic are one in the same, with better understanding and creativity. She is a walking crossroads of magic and technology meeting. And through this, the potential for enhancing the future continues to expand. A world of infinite possibilities becomes even more accessible than ever. She is curious enough to create many great possibilities for her friends, especially her best friend Ruby Rose, and thus seeks to master her combined science/technology-magic/supernatural powers to enhance their lives as much as she can."
"Dragons are the apex predators amongst supernatural forces, they're seen as living incarnations of power, capable of devouring anything they set their minds to. Even when creating abilities and tools and such specifically to kill them, it would take impossibly large amounts of effort to truly manage it if their strength was immense enough. The dragons vanished from one day without a trace, and haven't been seen in centuries...until Cinder. Her appearance, as well as her tremendous magic power, threatens to attract a new age of dragons, with her being the unknowing scorer to decide whether it's to Remnant's benefit or detriment. Regardless, Cinder will thrive. Survival on its own is meaningless. She wants to keep bettering her own state of being, continuing to prosper like a passionate growing flame. She is slightly unknowing of how inspirational her determination truly is to those around her. Or how the brighter and stronger her flame becomes, the warmer it becomes. And people gradually gather around it to warm their hearts and souls..."
"Ruby Rose is a young woman of truly astounding potential. Not just for battle, or for her ambitions she's set her sight on, but her utilization of her empathy. She wears her heart on her sleeve; if she's feeling happy, she'll display it in full. If she's sad, she'll cry her eyes out. If she's hopeful, she'll shine bright like a star and share her ambitions and optimism. If she's feeling furious at injustice, she'll demonstrate it with righteous impunity. Her open-minded and open-natured approach to her own emotions ensures that whether they're positive or negative, she'll gain strength from them. The light within her shines brighter, and even the darkness within her becomes gentle and nurturing. She then turns them both into power that protects and saves. This makes her a graver threat to the Grimm Devils than even her mother, as well as her mentor. She rejects the rejection and avoidance of negative emotions, for they serve a purpose for our survival, health, and well-being; there is a positive intention behind them. Compassion drives her to help the downtrodden face these negative emotions and seek out that positive result, for their own sake. This indomitable empathy, allowing herself to focus her emotions to certain goals, was how she connected with many of her companions, and shall make her a more compassionate Demon Queen."
Blake closed the book with her paw and sighed. Salem smiled and clapped her hands.
"Very good, that's about all of them! Our Grand Witches of the past and possible future, everyone! See? I told you that it didn't take too much!"
She placed her hands together.
"So you see, we have several witches around with great potential, and good hearts when you take the time to observe. Not all witches are evil. It's common, but not absolute. These Grand Witches will continue to amaze, that I can assure everyone."
"Meow! Ahem. Mreeeeoooow! Aren't you forgetting something, nya?"
Blake briefly locked the back of her paw, and swiped the fur behind her ear, impatiently whipping her tail against the table. Salem chuckled while shaking her head.
"Oh alright alright, your meows have been heard. Goodness, allow me some fun, won't you?"
Salem snaps her fingers. A puff of shadows surrounds the cat. Eventually Blake was revealed to be standing with her bare feet on the ground...wearing a similarly snugly fitting black and purple robe that left her slender legs similarly out in the open. She narrowed her eyes.
"...These aren't the clothes I had before you transformed me." Blake deadpanned.
"Whatever do you mean?"
Salem shrugs innocently. Blake's robes were rather small and short; they managed to just barely cover up a sizable bust, and there was the matter of her wide hips and large, shapely rear being even more noticeable than usual due to them. Her tail whipped in annoyance.
"You know exactly what I mean. What's the big idea?"
Salem rubbed her chin with a tilted head.
"Hmmm..speaking of big. Plenty of our lovely females have such ample and curvaceous rears. My dear Ruby's is quite cutely plump and round these days, while Cinder's is even fleshier. Could an appreciation be building...?"
"Salem..."
"Oh well, that's all the time we have for today. I did rather enjoy this, it was fun. Ah, I almost forgot. Are you also bewitched by our lovely Blake? Quite the beastly beauty isn't she?
"Salem..."
"Hm? A troll? Me?"
Salem gasped in fake shock, placing a hand over her chest, which shook slightly.
"Why, I truly do not know what you are talking about."
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"Greetings, one and all. This is your friendly neighborhood Grandma Grimm. Have you all been well? Are you getting proper rest? It's important to rest your mind as well as your heart and soul."
She hummed while sipping some of her tea, whilst sitting herself on her rocking chair.
"Hm? You're disappointed that you don't get to see me bathing again this time? Oh my, I have quite an admiring audience. Someone still considers me enticing. Perhaps another time, as I'm already quite clean."
She teased while setting her tea to the side, grabbing a book as she gently began rocking back and forth in her chair.
"This shouldn't take too much of your time, don't fret. Although if you find other reasons to stick around, please feel free. I don't quite look like it, but I rather enjoy the company. Now let's der here..."
Salem begins flipping through her book while rocking in her chair, before smiling and finding the pages she was looking for.
Grand Witches
"Here we are. Grand Witches."She hums while pushing some hair away from her face.
"If you've heard of witches before, the meaning of the word tends to mean a person(particularly a woman) who is credited with having malignant supernatural powers. In fairy tales they are usually depicted as old and wearing a pointed black hat. They also tend to live in solitary."
She tilts her head while lightly poking her cheek.
"Well...I am quite old...and I live in solitary, away from today's society..."
A tendril reaches out and places a pointed witch hat on her head. She smiles and points to it.
"Oh, look! I even have a black hat to go with my outfit! It seems like I fit the description, don't I?"
Salem playfully levitates in the air, a broom floating next to her, and she sits on it while sensually posing one arm behind her head and one leg crossed over the other.
"How do I look? Hmhmhmhm....have I bewitched you? Did you fall under my spell? Perhaps willingly?~"
She chuckles and shakes her head, shrugging.
"No, perhaps not. I probably better fit the definition for witch as ugly and ill-tempered, don't I? I definitely didn't have the best maturity in the world back then, despite my sophisticated demeanor. Let's continue."
Salem smiles as she leans down and continues reading through the book while levitating casually, leaving her nicely voluptuous rear in the air, emphasized by her black form-fitting robe.
"In a basic sense, a witch is usually a woman with magical, supernatural power. While it's usually attributed to malignant, cruel, evil witches...it's not the end all be all of their name. At the core, the beginning of the word's existence, it mostly meant 'female magic user'. The depiction and reception of witches differentiate across generations, genres, and audiences. It's. Simply more common for them to be depicted as evil, hence the alliteration 'Wicked Witch'. While the term 'mage' or 'magician' is attributed to magic users in general."
Salem blinks as she hears a low meow. She turns to see a black cat hopping on to the table, lightly sitting down. Salem smiles.
"Ah, witches also tend to have cats as companions and familiars. Especially black ones!"
"... Salem, this isn't funny. Change me back. Mreow."
Blake's deadpan voice left the cat's muzzle.
Blake guest stars!
"But Blakey..."Salem coos as she picks up the black cat under her arms and snuggles her, rubbing her cheek against hers.
"You look oh so cute like this!"
Blake's current aloof expression came with a very annoyed 'help me' look in her eyes.
"I'm never gonna live this down, meow."
Salem sets her down and continues reading her book.
"Back to the matter at hand, we've reach the core of today's subject. And that's the Grand Witches."
Salem clears her throat.
"In this precious tale, the Grand Witches are seen as such, because be it through their own actions, abilities, and efforts, they've displayed the most potential to direct and guide the fate of the age they live in, out of everyone else. This means fates, destinies, and prophecies they show no approval of tend a high risk of being thwarted. And those who 'walk in their shadow' (those who accompany them) end up capable of the same."
Salem smiles towards Blake, who rolls her eyes and uses her paw to turn the page for her.
"The term didn't quite exist back in the Barren Era, but the first four to manage these kinds of feats are the Four Maidens. I never would have been able to succeed in restoring Remnant if it wasn't for them. They directed the fate of their world in a new direction. They just needed a bit of...'motivation' from me, is all."
Blake flips to another page.
"Come on, mreow! How long are you going to keep me like this?"
Salem smiles sweetly and pets and scratches the top of her head, much to her annoyance. Further annoying her was that she actually began purring from the affection.
"Patience, young Blake. Now then, the Grand Witches of the Dark Ages."
Salem reads them off.
Maria Calavera
Reasoning: Immensely Vast Aura/War Veteran"Having played a pivotal role in ending the War of the Dead, thus sparing the living from the wrath of those dead and undead, Maria Calavera was classified as a Grand Witch due to surviving and then thriving past the worst period of the Dark Age. She is the oldest of the Grand Witches, yet despite a wrinkle here and there as well as grayed hair, she's still quite beautiful, and is as capable as she was in her prime, if not even MORE so. She currently possesses the MOST supernaturally powerful, exceeding amounts of Aura out of everyone. No one has come close to such a refined mastery and connection of/to the power of their soul like she does. She holds special mention for personally mentoring another current Grand Witch, and a future one, both being mother and daughter. She is also best friends with the father of another future Grand Witch, further contributing to her belief in the strong connections between souls."
Glynda GoodWitch
Reasoning: Ancient Archive KeepeBeacon's Headmistress"Of all the current major headquarters, Beacon is the most well known for producing, guiding, gathering, and supporting extraordinary heroes, explorers, adventurers, knights, etc. Glynda taking authority of Beacon means that she's placed herself in a position to influence how the next generation shall shape the new age. This is essential, because she guards an ancient library that holds all of Remnant's history and continually records it, so she knows what events must not be repeated. Her psychic abilities means she always keeps these things in mind, a these histories also give way to new stories. She plays a key part in Oscar Pine becoming his own kind of High Wizard beyond merely being Ozpin's successor, and how to build upon his own kind of wisdom and understanding of the world and how to help progress it."
Raven Branwen
Reasoning: Ruthlessness/Master Swordswoman"Born within a tribe where the weak are meant to be discarded and the strong continue on without them, Raven had espoused similar beliefs in her youth. However, once she saw that the Branwen Tribe was prepared to sacrifice their weakest link, her younger twin brother Qrow Branwen, to contract an ancient demon, after spiriting away the youngest children first, she didn't hesitate to cut down half of her own tribe to protect him. She killed the other half entirely when they tried the same with her daughter Yang Xiao Long years later. Both times her love for her family outweighed her once adamant loyalty to her tribe, which shaped her to one of the most merciless warriors on Remnant purely for their sake. On top of that, her mastery and understanding of all methods of swordsmanship leads to creating high quality blades used by many, from enhanced durability up to her own use of blades that cut through dimensions, or even time. The potential of the sword matches the sword wielder's will, and Raven is a woman of indomitable will."
Summer Rose
Reasoning: Mythical Beast Intuition/Sacred Silver Light"Summer Rose was a lost and lonely girl who was taken in by a surprisingly kind witch. After growing up on her care, she proved to be a prodigy in wielding her Inner Light, indicated by her Silver Eyes. Pushing onwards, she went on to make numerous connections with various beasts from normal, to ancient, to mystical, to mythical, to legendary. Helping them through various problems and protecting them from other threats indebted many to her. Some have taken her to being the 'Silver Guardian Wolf Goddess' due to her usage of her wolf form, her silver light, and how protective she is. Notably, she's rather embarrassed by the 'Goddess' part. Though few can blame them once they see her power and capabilities for themselves. Summer Rose is considered the best at using her Inner Light out of anyone and everyone in her lineage, discovering new advancements to the powers that no one before her has. Few Grimm can continually withstand the might of her light."
Salem sighs, briefly raising a hand to fan herself, pulling on her to be slightly for airing, which briefly revealed the top of her bust.
"Whew. That was a bit of a mouthful. Now then, let's briefly move onto the possible new Grand Witches of the Rebirth Era, each possessing supernatural amounts of potential, and how they could be seen as special threats to be targeted by their enemies. Blake, if you will?"
"If I do this, will you change me back?"
"Of course! It'll go by quick, I promise.~"
Blake rolled her eyes and sighed, before using her paw to turn the page, sitting on her haunches. Her turn to read.
Pyrrha Nikos
Reasoning: Superhuman Fighting Instinct/Destiny Unchosen"Pyrrha Nikos has immense fighting potential and capabilities, leading her on a path to being one of the best warriors in Remnant's history. She is the one many bet on when they want a high chance of ensured victory. This isn't a story of hard work overcoming raw talent. Or natural talent being all that matters. But dedicated effort, experience, and intense determination is what it takes to bring out the best of your talents. No one in the world is born completely and utterly talentless. And what people will remember even more than the envy of your talents, is what you go on to do with them. She embodies the personal strength to defy a fate you disapprove of or to fulfill a fate that you do. To choose yourself to be the one who makes that kind of decision, and to make it succeed. That is the power of choice and self determination. It takes a while before she can convince Cinder that she too wields this same power, as many have been thanks to her magnetic-like charisma."
Penny Polendina
Reasoning: Techno-Sorcery/Magic-Science Intuition"Penny Polendina is a young woman whose ability has the potential advances of magical and technological powers. She represents a future of further combinations between magic and super technology, possessing extraordinary abilities that neither can achieve on their own. In her hands, science and magic are one in the same, with better understanding and creativity. She is a walking crossroads of magic and technology meeting. And through this, the potential for enhancing the future continues to expand. A world of infinite possibilities becomes even more accessible than ever. She is curious enough to create many great possibilities for her friends, especially her best friend Ruby Rose, and thus seeks to master her combined science/technology-magic/supernatural powers to enhance their lives as much as she can."
Cinder Fall
Reasoning: Dragon Heritage/Immense Destructive Power"Dragons are the apex predators amongst supernatural forces, they're seen as living incarnations of power, capable of devouring anything they set their minds to. Even when creating abilities and tools and such specifically to kill them, it would take impossibly large amounts of effort to truly manage it if their strength was immense enough. The dragons vanished from one day without a trace, and haven't been seen in centuries...until Cinder. Her appearance, as well as her tremendous magic power, threatens to attract a new age of dragons, with her being the unknowing scorer to decide whether it's to Remnant's benefit or detriment. Regardless, Cinder will thrive. Survival on its own is meaningless. She wants to keep bettering her own state of being, continuing to prosper like a passionate growing flame. She is slightly unknowing of how inspirational her determination truly is to those around her. Or how the brighter and stronger her flame becomes, the warmer it becomes. And people gradually gather around it to warm their hearts and souls..."
Ruby Rose
Reasoning: Inner Light-Darkness Unison/Indomitable Heart"Ruby Rose is a young woman of truly astounding potential. Not just for battle, or for her ambitions she's set her sight on, but her utilization of her empathy. She wears her heart on her sleeve; if she's feeling happy, she'll display it in full. If she's sad, she'll cry her eyes out. If she's hopeful, she'll shine bright like a star and share her ambitions and optimism. If she's feeling furious at injustice, she'll demonstrate it with righteous impunity. Her open-minded and open-natured approach to her own emotions ensures that whether they're positive or negative, she'll gain strength from them. The light within her shines brighter, and even the darkness within her becomes gentle and nurturing. She then turns them both into power that protects and saves. This makes her a graver threat to the Grimm Devils than even her mother, as well as her mentor. She rejects the rejection and avoidance of negative emotions, for they serve a purpose for our survival, health, and well-being; there is a positive intention behind them. Compassion drives her to help the downtrodden face these negative emotions and seek out that positive result, for their own sake. This indomitable empathy, allowing herself to focus her emotions to certain goals, was how she connected with many of her companions, and shall make her a more compassionate Demon Queen."
Blake closed the book with her paw and sighed. Salem smiled and clapped her hands.
"Very good, that's about all of them! Our Grand Witches of the past and possible future, everyone! See? I told you that it didn't take too much!"
She placed her hands together.
"So you see, we have several witches around with great potential, and good hearts when you take the time to observe. Not all witches are evil. It's common, but not absolute. These Grand Witches will continue to amaze, that I can assure everyone."
"Meow! Ahem. Mreeeeoooow! Aren't you forgetting something, nya?"
Blake briefly locked the back of her paw, and swiped the fur behind her ear, impatiently whipping her tail against the table. Salem chuckled while shaking her head.
"Oh alright alright, your meows have been heard. Goodness, allow me some fun, won't you?"
Salem snaps her fingers. A puff of shadows surrounds the cat. Eventually Blake was revealed to be standing with her bare feet on the ground...wearing a similarly snugly fitting black and purple robe that left her slender legs similarly out in the open. She narrowed her eyes.
"...These aren't the clothes I had before you transformed me." Blake deadpanned.
"Whatever do you mean?"
Salem shrugs innocently. Blake's robes were rather small and short; they managed to just barely cover up a sizable bust, and there was the matter of her wide hips and large, shapely rear being even more noticeable than usual due to them. Her tail whipped in annoyance.
"You know exactly what I mean. What's the big idea?"
Salem rubbed her chin with a tilted head.
"Hmmm..speaking of big. Plenty of our lovely females have such ample and curvaceous rears. My dear Ruby's is quite cutely plump and round these days, while Cinder's is even fleshier. Could an appreciation be building...?"
"Salem..."
"Oh well, that's all the time we have for today. I did rather enjoy this, it was fun. Ah, I almost forgot. Are you also bewitched by our lovely Blake? Quite the beastly beauty isn't she?
"Salem..."
"Hm? A troll? Me?"
Salem gasped in fake shock, placing a hand over her chest, which shook slightly.
"Why, I truly do not know what you are talking about."